1
00:00:03,101 --> 00:00:04,227
Yeah?
You wanted to see me?
2
00:00:04,302 --> 00:00:07,794
Yes, Oscar, come on in.
Close the door if you would.
3
00:00:08,473 --> 00:00:10,304
Thank you. Thanks so
much for talking to me.
4
00:00:10,375 --> 00:00:11,399
Yeah, sure.
5
00:00:11,476 --> 00:00:13,842
I'm going in
for a procedure today.
6
00:00:13,912 --> 00:00:15,846
Is everything okay?
Yeah.
7
00:00:15,914 --> 00:00:18,109
It's routine. I'm just
a little bit scared.
8
00:00:18,183 --> 00:00:20,879
I'm sure everything
will be fine.
9
00:00:20,952 --> 00:00:23,443
What's the procedure,
if you don't mind my asking?
10
00:00:23,522 --> 00:00:25,114
It is a colonoscopy.
11
00:00:25,590 --> 00:00:26,716
Okay.
12
00:00:28,226 --> 00:00:30,786
In your experience,
what should I be expecting
13
00:00:30,862 --> 00:00:35,128
in terms of sensation
or emotions?
14
00:00:43,141 --> 00:00:47,475
Is there anything I can do to
make it more pleasurable for me,
15
00:00:47,546 --> 00:00:49,309
or for Dr. Chaudry?
16
00:00:51,316 --> 00:00:52,408
Oh, my God!
17
00:00:52,484 --> 00:00:54,679
My main concern, should
I have a safe word?
18
00:00:54,820 --> 00:00:56,014
Yeah.
19
00:01:17,943 --> 00:01:19,137
So, Michael, you think
you can give me a rundown
20
00:01:19,211 --> 00:01:20,838
on the Buffalo
clients by Monday?
21
00:01:20,912 --> 00:01:22,880
Absolutely. You know what?
I'll do you one better.
22
00:01:22,948 --> 00:01:24,472
Sunday. Sunday night.
23
00:01:24,549 --> 00:01:26,039
Okay. I will
get it Monday.
24
00:01:26,117 --> 00:01:27,812
Hold on, big guy.
25
00:01:27,886 --> 00:01:30,377
I'm going to put it in the mail
Sunday night, you'll get it Wednesday.
26
00:01:30,455 --> 00:01:32,355
Okay. Jim, you want to
hit the conference room?
27
00:01:32,424 --> 00:01:33,413
Sure.
28
00:01:33,492 --> 00:01:34,516
Hey, good luck.
29
00:01:34,726 --> 00:01:36,921
Oh, right, this thing.
I remember now.
30
00:01:36,995 --> 00:01:38,087
What's this about?
31
00:01:38,163 --> 00:01:39,790
This is just me and
David, if that's okay.
32
00:01:39,865 --> 00:01:41,389
It's okay with me. He's
going to want me in there.
33
00:01:41,466 --> 00:01:43,866
No. It's okay,
Michael. We got it.
34
00:01:44,035 --> 00:01:45,434
Really?
Yeah.
35
00:01:45,504 --> 00:01:47,699
All right. Do you mind
if I sit this out?
36
00:01:47,772 --> 00:01:51,606
I have so much work to do, I feel
like I'm going to blow my brains out.
37
00:01:52,811 --> 00:01:54,438
Okay. You got it.
38
00:02:00,819 --> 00:02:04,220
Am I worried that Jim and David
are having a meeting without me?
39
00:02:04,289 --> 00:02:07,986
No. Because we are
the three amigos.
40
00:02:08,760 --> 00:02:09,920
And once in a while,
41
00:02:09,995 --> 00:02:13,431
one of the amigos will
go off to the bathroom,
42
00:02:13,498 --> 00:02:16,331
while the other two
have a secret meeting.
43
00:02:22,807 --> 00:02:24,365
Hey, let me escort you to your desk.
44
00:02:24,442 --> 00:02:27,900
Okay. It's just three or
four steps, but thank you.
45
00:02:27,979 --> 00:02:30,140
Thank you. You and Jim are close, huh?
46
00:02:30,215 --> 00:02:33,412
Yeah. I think the pregnancy
really brought us together.
47
00:02:33,485 --> 00:02:36,420
Hey, what do you think he
and David are talking about?
48
00:02:36,488 --> 00:02:37,614
What do you...
49
00:02:37,689 --> 00:02:39,020
Um, I don't know.
50
00:02:39,090 --> 00:02:41,354
Well, you said good
luck to Jim as he walked in.
51
00:02:41,426 --> 00:02:45,055
Did I? Doesn't sound like
me. Not very superstitious.
52
00:02:50,001 --> 00:02:52,936
If you're lying to me right now, Pam,
53
00:02:53,004 --> 00:02:55,029
your baby is gonna
come out a liar.
54
00:02:56,841 --> 00:03:00,368
That's how it works. They inherit
things through the breast milk.
55
00:03:01,046 --> 00:03:03,310
Please don't talk
about my breast milk.
56
00:03:03,381 --> 00:03:05,747
I just don't want
you to lie to me.
57
00:03:06,084 --> 00:03:09,019
I don't want you to ever lie
to me. Have I ever lied to you?
58
00:03:09,087 --> 00:03:10,076
Yeah.
59
00:03:10,155 --> 00:03:11,747
I just don't
want you to.
60
00:03:11,823 --> 00:03:13,586
I was rushing
to fill an order.
61
00:03:13,658 --> 00:03:17,059
I put the ladder up to grab a box
of three hole from the top shelf,
62
00:03:17,128 --> 00:03:19,722
next thing I know, I'm on the
ground, ladder's on top of me.
63
00:03:19,831 --> 00:03:21,059
And that's how you
broke your ankle?
64
00:03:21,132 --> 00:03:22,292
Yes.
65
00:03:22,367 --> 00:03:24,335
Hmm. Interesting.
66
00:03:24,402 --> 00:03:28,463
How did the ladder end up on
top of you if you fell off of it?
67
00:03:28,540 --> 00:03:30,838
This doesn't concern you, man.
You need to walk away.
68
00:03:30,909 --> 00:03:33,173
Oh, really? I'm sorry. I
thought this was a free country.
69
00:03:33,244 --> 00:03:35,337
I didn't know we were
in Communist Sweden.
70
00:03:35,413 --> 00:03:36,471
If we were
living in Sweden,
71
00:03:36,548 --> 00:03:37,537
I wouldn't have
to worry about this
72
00:03:37,616 --> 00:03:39,550
because we'd have
universal healthcare.
73
00:03:40,285 --> 00:03:41,309
That's not... Okay.
74
00:03:41,386 --> 00:03:42,683
Be quiet.
I'm talking about...
75
00:03:42,754 --> 00:03:44,016
Hmm...
76
00:03:44,089 --> 00:03:45,556
I will send this
off to corporate.
77
00:03:45,624 --> 00:03:47,421
Make sure you hold on
to your medical bills.
78
00:03:47,492 --> 00:03:48,686
Feel better.
79
00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,024
Thanks, T-man. Later.
80
00:03:52,998 --> 00:03:55,626
So long, Darryl.
Feel better.
81
00:03:55,700 --> 00:03:57,258
He's lying.
82
00:03:57,335 --> 00:03:58,597
He has a doctor's note.
83
00:03:58,737 --> 00:04:02,798
From who? Dr. J? You really
need to investigate this.
84
00:04:02,874 --> 00:04:04,808
People don't just
fall off of ladders.
85
00:04:04,876 --> 00:04:06,241
Guy on my street
fell off a ladder
86
00:04:06,311 --> 00:04:07,903
painting his house.
It was on the news.
87
00:04:07,979 --> 00:04:10,777
Since when have you known
Darryl to rush to do anything
88
00:04:10,849 --> 00:04:13,283
other than to come up here
for birthday cake?
89
00:04:13,351 --> 00:04:15,581
"Y'all having birthday cake?"
90
00:04:15,654 --> 00:04:16,985
That's not a very good Darryl. Please!
91
00:04:17,055 --> 00:04:20,923
And how many foremen do
you know that pull boxes?
92
00:04:21,826 --> 00:04:23,987
It just doesn't add up.
93
00:04:26,631 --> 00:04:29,691
Well, we did a little
investigation, and Dwight had a good point.
94
00:04:29,768 --> 00:04:33,534
The ladder didn't reach the top
shelf. I don't know if I believe it,
95
00:04:33,605 --> 00:04:36,574
but I am a fan of the
hardboiled detective novel.
96
00:04:36,641 --> 00:04:38,973
"I'll punch you
into mush, see?"
97
00:04:39,944 --> 00:04:43,880
Uh-huh. Well, if he doesn't like it, you
can tell that s.o. B that he is fired.
98
00:04:43,948 --> 00:04:48,248
Sorry, I'm going into a meeting right
now. I will. I love you, too. Bye.
99
00:04:48,319 --> 00:04:49,308
Who was that?
100
00:04:49,387 --> 00:04:51,150
Sorry about that.
What'd I miss?
101
00:04:51,222 --> 00:04:53,656
Michael, we would like to continue
the rest of this meeting in private,
102
00:04:53,725 --> 00:04:54,714
please,
if you don't mind.
103
00:04:54,793 --> 00:04:56,090
I do not mind.
104
00:04:56,161 --> 00:04:59,028
Yes, I do. No, I don't.
Yes, I do. No, I don't mind.
105
00:04:59,097 --> 00:05:01,463
Catch you guys on the
flippity-flop. Oh, this...
106
00:05:01,533 --> 00:05:03,296
Call waiting. Yeah?
107
00:05:03,368 --> 00:05:05,461
Uh-huh. Well, you tell the
mayor he just lost six votes.
108
00:05:07,605 --> 00:05:09,539
They've been
in there a while.
109
00:05:09,607 --> 00:05:11,404
Yeah.
Can't be good.
110
00:05:12,043 --> 00:05:13,135
No.
111
00:05:13,211 --> 00:05:14,576
Think they're
talking about me?
112
00:05:15,213 --> 00:05:17,681
No, I think they're
talking about me.
113
00:05:17,749 --> 00:05:21,048
Yeah. That makes way more
sense. Okay. Thanks, boss.
114
00:05:21,886 --> 00:05:23,854
What is Jim telling
him? That I can't handle this job?
115
00:05:23,922 --> 00:05:26,049
That's bull crap.
That is bull crap.
116
00:05:27,058 --> 00:05:29,891
Although it has been
chaotic lately.
117
00:05:29,961 --> 00:05:32,020
Corporate shut down
the Buffalo branch,
118
00:05:32,097 --> 00:05:35,362
which left us to absorb
all of their clients.
119
00:05:35,433 --> 00:05:39,392
I will tell you, there
has been work every day.
120
00:05:39,471 --> 00:05:41,564
Had to come in
on a Saturday
121
00:05:42,474 --> 00:05:45,739
to retrieve... I left
my cell phone here.
122
00:05:47,312 --> 00:05:48,870
Hey, Kelly.
123
00:05:48,947 --> 00:05:51,279
So jealous
of your boobs.
124
00:05:52,150 --> 00:05:53,344
Thank you.
125
00:05:53,418 --> 00:05:55,784
Um, listen, I just wanted to confirm
126
00:05:55,854 --> 00:05:57,947
that you're not
coming to the wedding,
127
00:05:58,022 --> 00:06:01,458
which is totally understandable,
and more than fine.
128
00:06:01,526 --> 00:06:02,686
Is Ryan going?
129
00:06:02,761 --> 00:06:04,695
I don't know,
he hasn't RSVPed yet.
130
00:06:04,763 --> 00:06:07,197
We invited everyone in
the office to our wedding,
131
00:06:07,265 --> 00:06:08,823
even though we realized most people
132
00:06:08,900 --> 00:06:12,165
wouldn't be able to make
the drive to Niagara Falls.
133
00:06:12,537 --> 00:06:15,700
Which is why we're
having it in Niagara Falls.
134
00:06:16,341 --> 00:06:18,309
Then Michael
told everyone
135
00:06:18,376 --> 00:06:21,834
they could have Friday and
Monday off if they came.
136
00:06:21,913 --> 00:06:25,781
So now, people have to decide if
they want to come to our wedding
137
00:06:25,850 --> 00:06:27,841
or have to work.
138
00:06:27,919 --> 00:06:30,012
Here's the deal.
I really want to go.
139
00:06:30,088 --> 00:06:31,885
But I'm not gonna go
if Ryan doesn't go,
140
00:06:31,956 --> 00:06:34,049
because it's kind of
a waste of time.
141
00:06:34,125 --> 00:06:35,251
That came out wrong.
142
00:06:35,326 --> 00:06:36,987
It would be awesome if you
could try to get him to go
143
00:06:37,061 --> 00:06:40,326
because I'd really like
to be there to support Jim.
144
00:06:44,669 --> 00:06:46,830
What can I do
for you, hoss?
145
00:06:47,338 --> 00:06:48,600
How are your
sales doing?
146
00:06:48,673 --> 00:06:50,573
How are my sales doing?
147
00:06:51,176 --> 00:06:52,404
Busted.
148
00:06:53,511 --> 00:06:56,002
You know, my numbers
are down a little bit.
149
00:06:56,080 --> 00:06:58,241
And it's 'cause
of the economy.
150
00:06:59,350 --> 00:07:02,183
You're not buying it.
You're good.
151
00:07:02,253 --> 00:07:04,244
Okay, the truth is
152
00:07:04,322 --> 00:07:07,223
I have been having trouble
focusing lately. I'm in this weird,
153
00:07:07,292 --> 00:07:12,127
flirty, nebulous thing
with this cousin of mine.
154
00:07:12,931 --> 00:07:14,694
And it's a total mind f'er.
155
00:07:14,766 --> 00:07:16,461
Again with the cousin.
156
00:07:16,534 --> 00:07:18,195
Oh, I'm sorry, Phyllis.
157
00:07:18,269 --> 00:07:20,100
You explain
this email. Okay?
158
00:07:20,171 --> 00:07:24,574
"Hey, Andy, let's go visit Grandma
and then get drunk together. Ha, ha."
159
00:07:24,642 --> 00:07:28,100
Shh. I'm just trying to figure out
what's going on in that room, okay?
160
00:07:28,179 --> 00:07:30,010
Wallace
had to show up
161
00:07:30,081 --> 00:07:33,915
on the one four-month period
that I'm completely overwhelmed.
162
00:07:35,620 --> 00:07:39,021
You know when they say, "It's
so crazy it just might work?"
163
00:07:39,624 --> 00:07:43,287
Well, I don't believe that. I
say go for the airtight plan.
164
00:07:43,361 --> 00:07:45,192
And that is why
I am having Andy
165
00:07:45,263 --> 00:07:46,787
wheel me into
the conference room
166
00:07:46,865 --> 00:07:48,799
inside a makeshift
cheese cart.
167
00:07:49,467 --> 00:07:53,267
It is just elegant.
168
00:07:56,641 --> 00:07:58,006
Be my eyes.
You got it.
169
00:07:58,076 --> 00:07:59,941
What have we here?
Oh!
170
00:08:00,011 --> 00:08:01,035
Hello.
171
00:08:01,112 --> 00:08:02,374
Just backing up
and turning around.
172
00:08:02,447 --> 00:08:03,436
Hey, we're
gonna do this...
173
00:08:03,514 --> 00:08:05,573
It's not for you.
174
00:08:09,220 --> 00:08:12,712
I took the liberty of preparing
for you a cheese platter,
175
00:08:12,790 --> 00:08:16,886
which I will place here on the
eastern wall of the conference room.
176
00:08:16,961 --> 00:08:18,019
Cheese platter?
177
00:08:19,330 --> 00:08:22,629
From the Wisconsin region,
a nice, firm cheddar.
178
00:08:23,468 --> 00:08:27,268
Also from the great state of
Wisconsin, an aged Parmesan.
179
00:08:27,805 --> 00:08:30,535
Here you will find
a cheddar-style spread,
180
00:08:30,608 --> 00:08:34,704
which has reacted nicely with
the air to form a light rind,
181
00:08:34,779 --> 00:08:37,407
which I think you'll find both
challenging and delicious.
182
00:08:37,482 --> 00:08:39,416
At that point, I would
recommend you take
183
00:08:39,484 --> 00:08:42,510
a quick trip south of the border
to the great state of Illinois,
184
00:08:42,587 --> 00:08:45,579
where you will find this
fine blue cheese dressing.
185
00:08:45,657 --> 00:08:47,318
If I may be so bold,
186
00:08:47,392 --> 00:08:50,190
it's a lot of fun
to let the goldfish
187
00:08:50,261 --> 00:08:53,025
take a little swim
in the blue cheese.
188
00:08:56,167 --> 00:08:59,398
All right, well, I should
go. Thanks for this.
189
00:09:00,004 --> 00:09:01,198
You've given me
a lot to think about.
190
00:09:01,272 --> 00:09:03,297
Please promise me you won't
do anything until we speak.
191
00:09:03,374 --> 00:09:04,841
No, I won't.
192
00:09:05,977 --> 00:09:07,444
All right. Hey,
thanks for taking the time.
193
00:09:07,512 --> 00:09:10,106
Yeah. Appreciate it.
Thank you, Jim.
194
00:09:16,020 --> 00:09:17,578
Erin,
is Michael around?
195
00:09:17,655 --> 00:09:19,748
I think
he's around here.
196
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:22,387
Is that...
197
00:09:22,460 --> 00:09:23,620
Hey, hey, hey.
198
00:09:23,695 --> 00:09:25,629
You must have walked right
past me. How you doing?
199
00:09:25,697 --> 00:09:27,130
Yeah. Could we talk in
your office for a sec?
200
00:09:27,198 --> 00:09:29,132
Yes, definitely.
201
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:30,394
Okay.
202
00:09:38,276 --> 00:09:42,679
It sounds
like a EMD P40.
203
00:09:42,747 --> 00:09:45,181
Nah. That's a GE.
204
00:09:45,817 --> 00:09:47,341
The P40 is much
higher-pitched.
205
00:09:47,418 --> 00:09:48,851
You're into trains?
206
00:09:48,920 --> 00:09:50,512
Have been my whole life. Wow!
207
00:09:50,588 --> 00:09:53,148
I'm rebuilding a
turn-of-the-century steam engine
208
00:09:53,224 --> 00:09:54,748
in my slaughterhouse.
209
00:09:54,826 --> 00:09:56,760
That's so cool.
Yeah.
210
00:09:56,828 --> 00:09:58,455
Wow! I'd love to take a look at that.
211
00:09:58,529 --> 00:10:00,121
Yeah. It's just a
run-of-the-mill slaughterhouse,
212
00:10:00,198 --> 00:10:01,187
but sure, anytime.
213
00:10:01,265 --> 00:10:03,597
Well, you know,
because of the trains.
214
00:10:03,668 --> 00:10:05,533
Wait, someone's coming.
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
215
00:10:05,603 --> 00:10:08,003
It's Darryl! Get down!
He's not using crutches!
216
00:10:08,072 --> 00:10:09,664
Get the camera.
Start taping.
217
00:10:09,741 --> 00:10:10,765
Drive!
218
00:10:10,842 --> 00:10:12,707
Worker's comp, my ass!
219
00:10:12,777 --> 00:10:14,404
I can't believe this.
220
00:10:14,479 --> 00:10:15,639
Hey, you ass!
221
00:10:15,713 --> 00:10:16,737
Toby!
222
00:10:16,814 --> 00:10:19,544
You gonna eat all
that dog food yourself?
223
00:10:20,651 --> 00:10:22,778
No, no!
224
00:10:23,988 --> 00:10:25,285
Oh, man!
You okay?
225
00:10:25,356 --> 00:10:26,380
Just drive.
226
00:10:31,362 --> 00:10:33,023
Hey, Ryan.
Hey.
227
00:10:33,097 --> 00:10:36,032
So, I just wanted to confirm that
you're not coming to my wedding.
228
00:10:36,100 --> 00:10:38,159
Yeah, I might stop by.
229
00:10:38,236 --> 00:10:40,261
It costs about
$75 per person.
230
00:10:40,338 --> 00:10:43,865
Okay. I once had a glass of
Cognac that cost $77, so...
231
00:10:43,941 --> 00:10:46,933
Can you just tell me now
if you're coming or not?
232
00:10:47,445 --> 00:10:50,209
Yes. I'm coming
to your wedding.
233
00:10:50,281 --> 00:10:52,215
Okay. Ryan Howard, yes.
234
00:10:52,283 --> 00:10:53,841
Probably yes.
235
00:10:53,918 --> 00:10:55,613
Kelly Kapoor, yes.
236
00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:59,112
Are you sure you're okay with
these new responsibilities?
237
00:10:59,190 --> 00:11:00,418
Look who you're talking to.
238
00:11:00,491 --> 00:11:04,188
Just trying to figure out the best
way to utilize everyone's talents.
239
00:11:04,262 --> 00:11:06,389
Well, I would say
that my greatest talent
240
00:11:06,464 --> 00:11:09,831
is being the best
man, woman or child
241
00:11:09,901 --> 00:11:11,528
to have ever run
this branch. Ever.
242
00:11:11,602 --> 00:11:12,626
And what about Jim?
243
00:11:12,703 --> 00:11:14,193
You think Jim is
someone who is ready
244
00:11:14,272 --> 00:11:17,002
to move into
a management position?
245
00:11:22,013 --> 00:11:23,742
Permission to speak
on the record.
246
00:11:23,815 --> 00:11:25,112
Please do.
247
00:11:25,183 --> 00:11:28,175
Jim is like Big Bird.
248
00:11:28,252 --> 00:11:32,621
He is tall and yellow
and very nice.
249
00:11:32,690 --> 00:11:35,090
But would I put him
in charge? No.
250
00:11:35,626 --> 00:11:40,063
I don't think so. He... Big Bird
doesn't make the tough decisions.
251
00:11:40,932 --> 00:11:44,993
If I was going to put someone in
charge, I would put Bert in charge.
252
00:11:45,069 --> 00:11:46,969
Or I would put one of the
real grownups in charge,
253
00:11:47,038 --> 00:11:48,062
like Maria.
254
00:11:48,139 --> 00:11:49,470
Or Gordon, maybe.
255
00:11:49,540 --> 00:11:50,700
I thought you liked Jim.
256
00:11:50,775 --> 00:11:53,039
Very much.
Jim is my best friend.
257
00:11:53,111 --> 00:11:55,875
But here's his
performance report.
258
00:11:57,915 --> 00:11:59,314
Right here.
259
00:11:59,383 --> 00:12:02,181
Now, this was
written by Toby,
260
00:12:02,253 --> 00:12:05,620
who we all know is
extremely reliable.
261
00:12:06,290 --> 00:12:09,953
"Constant office distraction. Spends
way too much time at reception.
262
00:12:10,027 --> 00:12:13,292
"Antagonizes other salesmen.
Not at all what he thinks he is."
263
00:12:13,364 --> 00:12:16,492
It's not very well written.
But you get the gist.
264
00:12:16,567 --> 00:12:19,934
Is there anybody else you think could
run the day-to-day of the branch?
265
00:12:20,004 --> 00:12:22,165
I could just continue
to run it myself, that's...
266
00:12:22,240 --> 00:12:26,040
Jim had an interesting idea to
help you with this extra workload.
267
00:12:26,110 --> 00:12:28,101
And it involved
you being promoted
268
00:12:28,179 --> 00:12:30,579
to oversee all
northeast sales.
269
00:12:30,648 --> 00:12:33,742
And then Jim would be
promoted to your position.
270
00:12:36,320 --> 00:12:37,514
This was Jim's idea?
271
00:12:37,588 --> 00:12:38,577
Mmm-hmm.
272
00:12:39,757 --> 00:12:41,019
Wow!
273
00:12:43,594 --> 00:12:49,533
Well, I'd have to talk to my
mother and my guy at H&R Block.
274
00:12:52,503 --> 00:12:54,300
Okay. But, well, see,
here's the thing, though.
275
00:12:54,372 --> 00:12:55,930
The plan doesn't work
276
00:12:56,007 --> 00:12:58,669
unless we have someone to
replace you. I was hoping...
277
00:12:59,810 --> 00:13:03,041
Plus, we have to worry about
Jim. He has another job offer.
278
00:13:03,114 --> 00:13:05,344
We may have to replace him.
279
00:13:05,416 --> 00:13:09,182
I didn't tell Michael because
I thought he'd try to help.
280
00:13:10,154 --> 00:13:14,352
Example, he handed out Jell-O shots at
the 23rd mile of the Steamtown Marathon.
281
00:13:17,461 --> 00:13:19,691
Jim, can you walk me down
to my car for a second?
282
00:13:19,764 --> 00:13:20,924
Sure.
283
00:13:42,486 --> 00:13:45,944
I can't help but feel
partially responsible.
284
00:13:54,465 --> 00:13:59,164
Little pick-me-up. Those
are the best. Sugar rush.
285
00:13:59,237 --> 00:14:01,705
When you were in the office
earlier talking to Wallace,
286
00:14:01,772 --> 00:14:03,899
did I come up at all?
287
00:14:05,243 --> 00:14:08,076
Well, we did talk about
how handsome you are.
288
00:14:08,145 --> 00:14:09,476
Why don't we head into
your office and talk?
289
00:14:09,547 --> 00:14:13,176
Okay. What did
we... God! We said...
290
00:14:13,951 --> 00:14:16,886
I know there were
certain things we said.
291
00:14:17,355 --> 00:14:19,050
Michael, look.
I'll just be honest with you.
292
00:14:19,123 --> 00:14:21,990
Earlier today, I spoke with
Wallace about a promotion.
293
00:14:22,059 --> 00:14:23,617
And I actually think
that talk went really well.
294
00:14:23,694 --> 00:14:24,718
Mmm-hmm.
295
00:14:24,795 --> 00:14:26,126
And then,
after he spoke with you,
296
00:14:26,197 --> 00:14:28,757
for some reason, it felt
like things had changed.
297
00:14:28,833 --> 00:14:31,199
Hmm. That's weird.
That's weird.
298
00:14:32,270 --> 00:14:33,931
Kind of weirding me out.
299
00:14:34,005 --> 00:14:36,735
Did you know that Lincoln's
secretary was named Kennedy?
300
00:14:36,807 --> 00:14:39,139
Michael,
did you say anything?
301
00:14:39,510 --> 00:14:42,172
Tell you what,
when you leave this office,
302
00:14:42,246 --> 00:14:44,373
I'm going to call Wallace
and I'm going to tell him
303
00:14:44,448 --> 00:14:46,211
that you should
get that promotion.
304
00:14:46,284 --> 00:14:47,376
Really?
Yes.
305
00:14:47,451 --> 00:14:48,850
You will?
Yes.
306
00:14:48,919 --> 00:14:50,409
Wanna do it right now?
307
00:14:50,488 --> 00:14:51,477
Yes.
308
00:14:52,657 --> 00:14:55,353
I tried to keep
Michael in the dark.
309
00:14:57,028 --> 00:15:01,089
I should have known that he can
do just as much damage in the dark.
310
00:15:01,332 --> 00:15:02,594
I need to see
your pupils.
311
00:15:02,667 --> 00:15:04,100
I have to see if
they're dilating...
312
00:15:04,168 --> 00:15:05,897
Toby! Dwight!
313
00:15:06,871 --> 00:15:08,099
Is that them?
314
00:15:08,172 --> 00:15:09,366
Definitely.
315
00:15:10,474 --> 00:15:13,443
You come to my house,
bust up my trash cans,
316
00:15:13,511 --> 00:15:16,412
call my baby sister an ass
and told her to eat dog food?
317
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,175
We thought that
she was you.
318
00:15:18,249 --> 00:15:20,444
Why would you think
a lady is me?
319
00:15:24,155 --> 00:15:28,683
Are you serious? Because
you look exactly alike.
320
00:15:28,759 --> 00:15:29,953
Am I the only one?
- That's too far...
321
00:15:30,027 --> 00:15:31,892
Are you getting this?
I mean...
322
00:15:31,962 --> 00:15:32,951
I don't see it.
323
00:15:33,030 --> 00:15:34,827
Here's what
I'm gonna do.
324
00:15:34,899 --> 00:15:38,357
I'm calling corporate and I'm filing
a complaint against both of you.
325
00:15:38,436 --> 00:15:39,664
Oh, Darryl.
326
00:15:39,737 --> 00:15:40,897
Come on, Gwyneth.
327
00:15:42,206 --> 00:15:43,264
Sad.
328
00:15:44,809 --> 00:15:46,299
This is David.
329
00:15:47,144 --> 00:15:49,135
Hey, David,
this is Michael...
330
00:15:50,514 --> 00:15:51,981
Michael Scott here.
Yeah.
331
00:15:52,049 --> 00:15:54,313
Just wanted to talk to
you about Jim Halpert.
332
00:15:54,385 --> 00:15:58,446
I understand that he did
not receive that promotion,
333
00:15:58,522 --> 00:16:00,490
and I wanted to see
what I could do
334
00:16:00,558 --> 00:16:02,958
to nudge you in the right direction.
335
00:16:03,561 --> 00:16:06,155
So, what, you're changing
your mind about Jim?
336
00:16:06,230 --> 00:16:10,860
Absolutely not!
Like I said before,
337
00:16:10,935 --> 00:16:14,427
Jim is fantastic
and he deserves this job.
338
00:16:15,406 --> 00:16:17,670
Michael, it seems like
you're cutting in and out.
339
00:16:17,742 --> 00:16:20,734
This is not what
you said earlier.
340
00:16:20,811 --> 00:16:22,438
What... Here's the thing.
341
00:16:23,581 --> 00:16:25,048
Jim is the best
man for this job.
342
00:16:25,116 --> 00:16:26,413
I think you should
give it to him.
343
00:16:26,484 --> 00:16:28,748
Well, it doesn't change what
you showed me in Jim's file.
344
00:16:28,819 --> 00:16:30,184
What?
Well...
345
00:16:31,288 --> 00:16:33,688
That was an anomaly.
346
00:16:34,358 --> 00:16:40,024
That file had been falsified.
Toby Flenderson is doing drugs.
347
00:16:40,097 --> 00:16:42,031
Michael, I really don't know
what's going on down there, but...
348
00:16:43,167 --> 00:16:44,725
Oh, damn it!
349
00:16:44,802 --> 00:16:48,329
I am getting pulled over for
talking on my cell. Damn it!
350
00:16:52,143 --> 00:16:56,580
Hey, Darryl, look,
we're here to apologize.
351
00:16:56,647 --> 00:16:57,841
We're cool.
- Wait.
352
00:16:57,915 --> 00:17:00,145
They're using the lift as
their own personal elevator.
353
00:17:00,217 --> 00:17:01,809
What?
He broke his ankle
354
00:17:01,886 --> 00:17:03,979
climbing over the railing,
then he lied about it
355
00:17:04,054 --> 00:17:06,818
because it was a misuse
of company equipment.
356
00:17:06,891 --> 00:17:08,381
Case closed.
357
00:17:08,459 --> 00:17:09,892
Stupidest thing
I ever heard.
358
00:17:09,960 --> 00:17:13,828
Really? Then why is there
new wood only on one railing?
359
00:17:15,032 --> 00:17:17,728
Let's just check
the security tapes, Toby.
360
00:17:18,569 --> 00:17:21,629
Well, you know, I don't think
there's any reason to check them,
361
00:17:21,705 --> 00:17:24,902
but I suppose if we wanted
to be really certain.
362
00:17:24,975 --> 00:17:27,239
All right. Yeah.
Fine, so whatever.
363
00:17:27,311 --> 00:17:28,300
Yes!
364
00:17:28,379 --> 00:17:29,607
You really did it.
365
00:17:29,680 --> 00:17:33,377
Now, I would like to file an
official complaint to corporate
366
00:17:33,451 --> 00:17:36,852
because Darryl lied
on an official form.
367
00:17:36,921 --> 00:17:39,481
And I'm telling them you guys
sexually harassed my sister.
368
00:17:39,557 --> 00:17:42,788
No judge
is gonna believe that.
369
00:17:45,262 --> 00:17:46,559
Okay.
370
00:17:47,131 --> 00:17:49,565
Look, we could all file
complaints against each other
371
00:17:49,633 --> 00:17:52,397
and just drown in a sea
of paperwork, but,
372
00:17:52,470 --> 00:17:55,667
you know, we'll just
move on with our lives.
373
00:17:56,941 --> 00:18:01,844
So, Dwight and Darryl came to an
agreement that they would both file
374
00:18:01,912 --> 00:18:03,436
complaints
with corporate,
375
00:18:03,514 --> 00:18:06,142
and now I get to do
all this paperwork.
376
00:18:07,518 --> 00:18:09,145
We worked it out.
377
00:18:12,022 --> 00:18:15,185
Hey, hey, Jim. It would make
me feel really good right now
378
00:18:15,259 --> 00:18:18,626
if you would just punch me in
the face, all right? Just do it.
379
00:18:18,696 --> 00:18:20,186
How many times
have I asked you
380
00:18:20,264 --> 00:18:21,731
to put me up for
a branch manager job?
381
00:18:21,799 --> 00:18:24,768
I never recommended you because
I didn't want to lose you.
382
00:18:24,835 --> 00:18:26,496
And I didn't
want to lose Pam.
383
00:18:26,570 --> 00:18:28,128
Now I don't want
to lose the baby.
384
00:18:28,205 --> 00:18:30,105
So, instead,
you screwed me?
385
00:18:30,174 --> 00:18:32,233
That's what she said.
No.
386
00:18:33,410 --> 00:18:34,399
David Wallace
is calling.
387
00:18:34,478 --> 00:18:35,604
We're kind of in the
middle of something here.
388
00:18:35,679 --> 00:18:36,668
Should I tell him
you'll call back?
389
00:18:36,747 --> 00:18:39,944
Yeah. No.
I'll tell him myself.
390
00:18:40,417 --> 00:18:41,907
Let's both.
391
00:18:46,123 --> 00:18:47,112
Hello?
392
00:18:47,191 --> 00:18:48,419
Hey, Michael.
Yes.
393
00:18:48,492 --> 00:18:49,652
You got Jim
there with you?
394
00:18:49,727 --> 00:18:51,194
No, it's just us.
395
00:18:51,262 --> 00:18:54,129
Actually, can you call Jim in?
I want him on this. Please.
396
00:18:54,198 --> 00:18:56,792
Oh! Well, here
he is right now.
397
00:18:58,068 --> 00:18:59,296
Come in.
398
00:19:05,376 --> 00:19:06,843
Hi, David.
399
00:19:06,911 --> 00:19:09,778
Hey, guys.
So, I spoke to Alan.
400
00:19:09,847 --> 00:19:13,305
We had kind of an unconventional
idea, which I think is pretty cool.
401
00:19:13,384 --> 00:19:15,944
But it only works if
everyone's onboard.
402
00:19:16,020 --> 00:19:18,682
Well, just as long as it
means Jim becomes a manager.
403
00:19:18,756 --> 00:19:22,055
We were thinking of having two
branch managers in Scranton.
404
00:19:22,126 --> 00:19:24,560
Both of you guys
working as co-managers.
405
00:19:24,628 --> 00:19:25,993
Jim would handle
the day-to-day,
406
00:19:26,063 --> 00:19:29,430
and Michael, you would focus on
clients and big picture stuff.
407
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:30,728
Wow!
That sounds pretty cool.
408
00:19:30,801 --> 00:19:32,029
I like that!
409
00:19:32,102 --> 00:19:33,899
So, manager
and co-manager.
410
00:19:33,971 --> 00:19:36,064
Co-manager and co-manager.
411
00:19:36,140 --> 00:19:37,630
See, there are a lot
of moving pieces
412
00:19:37,708 --> 00:19:40,074
and this is the only way
I can sell it upstairs.
413
00:19:40,144 --> 00:19:41,907
Well, that might be a
little confusing for people
414
00:19:41,979 --> 00:19:44,140
because they
know me as manager.
415
00:19:44,815 --> 00:19:48,114
All right, hey, Michael, can
you pick up for one second?
416
00:19:48,819 --> 00:19:51,583
Okay, look, I'm not going
to force you into anything.
417
00:19:51,655 --> 00:19:53,816
If you're willing
to lose Jim, fine.
418
00:19:53,891 --> 00:19:56,985
You just say so. We'll
find another solution. Okay?
419
00:19:57,895 --> 00:19:59,988
Is that what
you want to do?
420
00:20:06,570 --> 00:20:08,197
Okay, people, listen up!
- Okay, everybody.
421
00:20:08,272 --> 00:20:10,263
I have an announcement to make.
422
00:20:10,341 --> 00:20:11,569
Fraud was committed in... Whoa!
423
00:20:11,642 --> 00:20:12,631
Do you have
an announcement?
424
00:20:12,710 --> 00:20:14,075
I was making it.
425
00:20:14,144 --> 00:20:16,977
Everybody, David Wallace
and I have talked,
426
00:20:17,047 --> 00:20:21,040
and we have decided to promote
Jim to the position of co-manager.
427
00:20:21,785 --> 00:20:22,877
Co-manager of what?
428
00:20:22,953 --> 00:20:24,784
Of your butt!
429
00:20:25,456 --> 00:20:29,392
And your butt, and your butt, and your
butt. All of Scranton branch butts.
430
00:20:29,460 --> 00:20:30,984
What's happening
to you, Michael?
431
00:20:31,061 --> 00:20:32,187
What's happening to me?
432
00:20:32,262 --> 00:20:34,696
I am also being
promoted to co-manager.
433
00:20:34,765 --> 00:20:37,131
We will be
co-managers together.
434
00:20:38,469 --> 00:20:41,233
Jim Halpert, welcome.
435
00:20:41,305 --> 00:20:42,670
Thank you.
436
00:20:51,448 --> 00:20:54,246
Niagara Falls in October?
Hells yeah!
437
00:20:54,318 --> 00:20:57,754
Do you think that you could
send in your RSVP card?
438
00:20:57,821 --> 00:20:59,254
No. I'll just
tell you now. Easier.
439
00:20:59,323 --> 00:21:01,655
Well, you have to
choose a food option,
440
00:21:01,725 --> 00:21:04,216
and there's information in there
about directions and lodging.
441
00:21:04,294 --> 00:21:07,161
I'll just have whatever's
fanciest, unless there's ribs,
442
00:21:07,231 --> 00:21:09,825
and I'll just get all the other
information the day of. I'll text you.
443
00:21:09,900 --> 00:21:12,926
You are going to text me
the morning of my wedding
444
00:21:13,003 --> 00:21:14,470
to ask for directions...
Mmm-hmm. Right.
445
00:21:14,538 --> 00:21:16,836
...and you will eat
whatever is fanciest?
446
00:21:16,907 --> 00:21:18,238
Unless there's ribs.
447
00:21:19,576 --> 00:21:20,634
Rude.
448
00:21:20,711 --> 00:21:22,611
So rude, right?
Mmm-hmm.
449
00:21:22,680 --> 00:21:25,979
Oh, my gosh. I have been
chasing people down all day.
450
00:21:26,050 --> 00:21:27,039
It's incredible.
451
00:21:27,117 --> 00:21:28,778
Pam, my bag was there.