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Things are a little slow here,
2
00:00:08,800 --> 00:00:12,070
And there's only so much cold
calling you can do in a day.
3
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Turns out there's no limit
to the number of cheese puffs
4
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Yocan throw at someone's face.
5
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We're getting pretty good at it.
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-=Www.Ydy.Com/bbs=-
Proudly presents
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-=Www.Ydy.Com/bbs=-
Sync:ytet-¶¬ãßµäöí
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the.Office
season5 episode22
9
00:01:21,330 --> 00:01:23,190
Andy put down a bunch of deposits
10
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:24,640
On stuff for his wedding with angela,
11
00:01:24,660 --> 00:01:26,370
But then she was sleeping with dwight
12
00:01:26,380 --> 00:01:29,020
For...several years.
13
00:01:29,030 --> 00:01:30,150
Wait,no,that can't be right.
14
00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:32,090
The timeline's messy.
15
00:01:32,100 --> 00:01:34,650
Anyway,now we are going bargain hunting
16
00:01:34,670 --> 00:01:36,890
In the haunted graveyard of their love.
17
00:01:38,310 --> 00:01:40,710
This is my solo.
18
00:01:47,140 --> 00:01:49,080
Ba dum bum bum
19
00:01:49,100 --> 00:01:51,120
Ba dum bum bum
20
00:01:51,140 --> 00:01:52,920
Ba dum bum m
21
00:01:52,930 --> 00:01:53,800
Ba
dum--
22
00:01:53,810 --> 00:01:55,910
I'm confused.
23
00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:58,700
Am i walking down the
aisle toyou can call me al?
24
00:01:58,710 --> 00:02:00,220
Trust me,you will not be walking.
25
00:02:00,230 --> 00:02:02,470
You will be boogie-Ing.
26
00:02:02,490 --> 00:02:04,330
I am extremely interested.
27
00:02:04,340 --> 00:02:06,110
So how much will all of this cost?
28
00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:08,950
Well,12 guys,airfare,three
nights in a hotel,
29
00:02:08,970 --> 00:02:12,820
Food per diem,table
up front for merch...
30
00:02:13,310 --> 00:02:15,450
$9,000.
31
00:02:15,660 --> 00:02:16,750
I don't know.
32
00:02:16,760 --> 00:02:17,650
It-- It seems
like a lot
33
00:02:17,660 --> 00:02:18,780
For an a cappella group
34
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:20,740
From a college we never went to.
35
00:02:20,750 --> 00:02:24,790
Did you even hear the
music i just played for you?
36
00:02:30,450 --> 00:02:32,350
What's wrong with you?
37
00:02:32,700 --> 00:02:34,540
Seleeves are cutting off my circulation.
38
00:02:34,550 --> 00:02:36,390
Not enough blood getting to my hands.
39
00:02:36,400 --> 00:02:37,750
I think you look nice.
40
00:02:37,760 --> 00:02:40,580
Doesn't charles know he's
compromising my attack readiness?
41
00:02:40,590 --> 00:02:41,800
It'sot a dress code.
42
00:02:41,810 --> 00:02:43,690
It's a death sentence.
43
00:02:43,710 --> 00:02:46,040
- Looking good.
- 'Kay,thank you.
44
00:02:48,630 --> 00:02:50,450
It's a straight jacket!
45
00:02:50,460 --> 00:02:51,950
Okay.
46
00:02:52,570 --> 00:02:54,370
When michael was in charge,
47
00:02:54,510 --> 00:02:56,750
This place was like the roman empire.
48
00:02:56,770 --> 00:02:58,720
And the wild west.
49
00:02:59,120 --> 00:03:01,150
And war-Torn poland.
50
00:03:01,240 --> 00:03:02,910
And poland.
51
00:03:03,210 --> 00:03:06,330
There was just a lot going on,
52
00:03:06,340 --> 00:03:07,060
So what you wore to work
53
00:03:07,070 --> 00:03:09,230
Was the least of anybody's worries.
54
00:03:09,390 --> 00:03:11,200
And in that chaos,
55
00:03:11,220 --> 00:03:13,040
I soared.
56
00:03:15,430 --> 00:03:16,460
- Hey.
- Hey.
57
00:03:16,470 --> 00:03:18,830
Ed's tires is thinking
of making a change.
58
00:03:18,840 --> 00:03:19,670
Is this good?
59
00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:21,440
They have some great kitchen ideas.
60
00:03:21,450 --> 00:03:24,180
Oh. Okay. Ed's tires,huh?
61
00:03:24,210 --> 00:03:26,130
It's small,i know.
62
00:03:28,070 --> 00:03:29,730
I really appreciate it.
63
00:03:29,750 --> 00:03:30,380
Thanks,michael.
64
00:03:30,390 --> 00:03:32,090
What--
Whats this?
65
00:03:32,100 --> 00:03:32,930
It's for your trouble.
66
00:03:32,940 --> 00:03:35,250
Wh-- I don't need
$6 to help a friend.
67
00:03:35,260 --> 00:03:36,670
No,no,listen,
68
00:03:36,680 --> 00:03:38,450
As a friend,i want you to have it.
69
00:03:38,460 --> 00:03:39,390
Michael,you know i can't take this.
70
00:03:39,400 --> 00:03:41,540
Yes,i do.
71
00:03:41,550 --> 00:03:43,370
But don't forget you owe me $10.
72
00:03:43,380 --> 00:03:46,430
That was four years ago. Why
don't you let it go?Michael.
73
00:03:47,130 --> 00:03:49,700
What was up with pam being all
pushy and negative in there?
74
00:03:49,720 --> 00:03:51,800
I think she just didn't
want a crucifix cake.
75
00:03:51,820 --> 00:03:54,770
It scares me to see you going
down a road that i went down.
76
00:03:54,780 --> 00:03:55,980
Am i going down a road?
77
00:03:55,990 --> 00:03:58,490
When i see her bossing
you around like that,
78
00:03:58,500 --> 00:04:00,320
It just makes me wonder
79
00:04:00,330 --> 00:04:04,220
If this thing really has the legs
80
00:04:04,330 --> 00:04:06,300
To go the distan.
81
00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:08,380
It's so scary
82
00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:10,820
How right the things you're saying are,
83
00:04:10,830 --> 00:04:13,470
And you're coming at it
with almost no knowledge,
84
00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:15,830
So of course i trust
your opinion on this.
85
00:04:15,840 --> 00:04:18,210
I know a few
things about love--
86
00:04:18,400 --> 00:04:23,400
Horrible,te awful,awfulthings.
87
00:04:23,570 --> 00:04:26,010
I was gonna use today to purge my inbox,
88
00:04:26,020 --> 00:04:29,050
But now something much
more pressing has come up.
89
00:04:30,310 --> 00:04:31,180
Ed's tires.
90
00:04:31,190 --> 00:04:32,450
Why don't you tell them
91
00:04:32,460 --> 00:04:34,480
That we have fewer clients,
92
00:04:34,490 --> 00:04:37,170
So that we can spend
more me with each of them.
93
00:04:37,190 --> 00:04:40,440
Also try to discuss it over indian food,
94
00:04:40,450 --> 00:04:43,520
And try to mention
how you distrust women.
95
00:04:43,530 --> 00:04:44,710
I'm not gonna do that.
96
00:04:44,720 --> 00:04:45,600
That is smart.
97
00:04:45,610 --> 00:04:47,250
That would not seem genuine.
98
00:04:47,260 --> 00:04:48,450
- Ryan?
- I can get there.
99
00:04:48,470 --> 00:04:50,190
Good. You take the lead on this one.
100
00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:53,850
Also,dnoforget that he has just
gone through a messy divorce.
101
00:04:53,860 --> 00:04:54,820
Oh,awesome.
102
00:04:54,830 --> 00:04:56,730
Bring it in.Morning cheer.
103
00:05:01,690 --> 00:05:03,520
U-G-L-Y
104
00:05:03,530 --> 00:05:06,230
You ain't got no alibi you ugly
105
00:05:06,650 --> 00:05:07,550
You ugly
106
00:05:07,570 --> 00:05:09,450
You mama says you ugly
107
00:05:09,460 --> 00:05:12,700
Go michael scott paper company!
108
00:05:14,830 --> 00:05:16,620
I'm here.
109
00:05:16,630 --> 00:05:18,600
I'm part of this now.
110
00:05:19,720 --> 00:05:20,740
You needed to speak to me?
111
00:05:20,750 --> 00:05:22,720
Dwight,take a seat.
112
00:05:22,740 --> 00:05:24,980
I prefer to stand. Less blood clots.
113
00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:28,100
Nah,that's weird. You're gonna sit.
114
00:05:28,820 --> 00:05:29,790
Great.
115
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:30,730
You know,dwight,
116
00:05:30,750 --> 00:05:33,510
It has been quite a
transition for all of us.
117
00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:36,760
Are you happy with the way
things have been runnin' lately?
118
00:05:36,780 --> 00:05:37,650
Why do you ask?
119
00:05:37,660 --> 00:05:39,920
Do you mean compared to the way
things ran with other bosses?
120
00:05:39,940 --> 00:05:40,950
Comparisons arhard.
121
00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,880
I've just been impressed
with your performance,
122
00:05:42,890 --> 00:05:45,920
And i wanted to make sure
good work doesn't go unnoticed.
123
00:05:46,010 --> 00:05:47,340
Your concern is noted.
124
00:05:47,350 --> 00:05:49,020
Yeah,i like your work ethic.
125
00:05:49,030 --> 00:05:51,200
You're so...focused.
126
00:05:51,210 --> 00:05:53,050
Like a wolf. Thank you.
127
00:05:53,470 --> 00:05:55,900
And i wanna start givin'
you more responsibility.
128
00:05:56,070 --> 00:05:59,010
What do you say you and i
go out for a dri this week?
129
00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:01,370
Really?
130
00:06:01,380 --> 00:06:03,230
Definitely.
131
00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:06,830
It's firm.
132
00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:09,720
I need you to get me the prices
133
00:06:09,730 --> 00:06:11,250
That you're charging ed's tires,
134
00:06:11,260 --> 00:06:13,230
So i can undercut dunder mifflin.
135
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,660
I don't know that i can do that now.
136
00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,210
You know,uh,something's come up.
137
00:06:17,220 --> 00:06:19,450
Oh,n-- Is
it mose?
138
00:06:19,520 --> 00:06:21,280
Did you put the cover on that well?
139
00:06:21,290 --> 00:06:22,410
No,mose is fine.
140
00:06:22,420 --> 00:06:24,040
I-- I roped it off.
It's not about mose.
141
00:06:24,060 --> 00:06:26,570
Listen,things are changing here,michael.
142
00:06:26,580 --> 00:06:28,270
They're changing fast.
143
00:06:28,280 --> 00:06:29,680
I'm not following you.
144
00:06:29,690 --> 00:06:31,540
Imagine...
145
00:06:32,070 --> 00:06:36,740
Someone has a personal
hero they really wanna help,
146
00:06:37,090 --> 00:06:38,760
But then there's this new guy,
147
00:06:38,770 --> 00:06:43,000
Very cool,very will smith-Esque,
148
00:06:43,010 --> 00:06:46,160
Who would not like it
if he helped his hero.
149
00:06:46,170 --> 00:06:48,580
Personal hero,cool new guy.
150
00:06:48,590 --> 00:06:50,640
Okay,i think i'm getting your drift.
151
00:06:50,650 --> 00:06:52,330
Good,so you see what i'm saying?
152
00:06:52,340 --> 00:06:54,190
Crystal clear.
153
00:06:54,610 --> 00:06:56,390
So is this for a movie
that you're writing?
154
00:06:56,400 --> 00:06:57,910
- No.
- Can i use it?
155
00:06:57,920 --> 00:07:00,160
No.
156
00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,260
Dwight,are you talking about us?
157
00:07:10,270 --> 00:07:12,850
It is possible that i
could be talking about us.
158
00:07:12,870 --> 00:07:14,530
Someone could say
159
00:07:14,540 --> 00:07:17,660
It is like the situation
that we are in now?
160
00:07:17,670 --> 00:07:20,610
Itisthe situation we are in now.
161
00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:22,560
So,i would say
162
00:07:22,570 --> 00:07:25,840
That the old boss has
always been good to dwight,
163
00:07:25,860 --> 00:07:27,020
And he was there first,
164
00:07:27,030 --> 00:07:28,810
So he has dibs.
165
00:07:28,820 --> 00:07:30,620
You respect dibs,don't you?
166
00:07:30,630 --> 00:07:32,290
I'm not a barbarian.
167
00:07:32,300 --> 00:07:36,010
Good. Will you et me in
20 minutes at the spot?
168
00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:37,420
I will.
169
00:07:37,430 --> 00:07:39,730
- Dwight.
- Yes?
170
00:07:40,300 --> 00:07:41,870
Is the cool new guy charles?
171
00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:43,220
I've said too much.
172
00:07:43,230 --> 00:07:45,040
Is it stanley?
173
00:07:45,360 --> 00:07:47,140
Hey,andy.
174
00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:48,780
You know,i been thinkin'
about what you said,and...
175
00:07:48,790 --> 00:07:49,490
"Noishe."
176
00:07:49,500 --> 00:07:50,770
...i just don't know if i can do it.
177
00:07:50,780 --> 00:07:52,720
That's interesting,because
what i hear you saying
178
00:07:52,730 --> 00:07:55,900
Is that you do want to do
it,which means you can do it.
179
00:07:55,910 --> 00:07:57,750
Believe me,i broke up with angela,
180
00:07:57,770 --> 00:08:00,950
And i'm,like,the happiest guy ever.
181
00:08:01,530 --> 00:08:03,550
I mean,i'm so happy.
182
00:08:03,560 --> 00:08:05,090
I'm so happy.
183
00:08:05,100 --> 00:08:07,120
Like,total freedom,you know?
184
00:08:07,130 --> 00:08:09,490
It's just that pam gets me
through the day,you know?
185
00:08:09,500 --> 00:08:11,490
I really rely on her.
186
00:08:11,510 --> 00:08:12,980
I'm pretty emotionally needy.
187
00:08:12,990 --> 00:08:14,740
And you know what?
188
00:08:15,510 --> 00:08:17,580
I am here for you.
189
00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:22,360
Let me be your traveling pants.
190
00:08:25,430 --> 00:08:27,420
Ah,what'd you do that for?
191
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,580
You know that i was doin' this.
192
00:08:29,600 --> 00:08:31,710
Totally. Okay.
193
00:08:32,550 --> 00:08:34,880
Hello,dwight. What's with the shirt?
194
00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:38,970
Are you all right?
195
00:08:38,980 --> 00:08:40,270
I'm sorry,michael.
196
00:08:40,280 --> 00:08:41,090
Hi,michael. Oh,my god.
197
00:08:41,100 --> 00:08:42,860
Run! Run! It's a setup. Setup!
198
00:08:42,870 --> 00:08:43,170
No,mich-- Michael.
Dwight,run!
199
00:08:43,190 --> 00:08:46,230
Michael,no. Let's beool,okay?
200
00:08:46,250 --> 00:08:48,340
You be cool. Yes.
201
00:08:48,770 --> 00:08:50,070
Just-- What's
goin' on?
202
00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:52,530
We need to talk about our two companies,
203
00:08:52,540 --> 00:08:54,040
And how we should behave.
204
00:08:54,060 --> 00:08:58,020
Dwight tells me you've been
pestering him for company info.
205
00:08:58,040 --> 00:08:59,810
Mm--
Do...
206
00:08:59,820 --> 00:09:00,730
Dwight
would not--
207
00:09:00,740 --> 00:09:02,300
- He did.
- I did,michael.
208
00:09:02,310 --> 00:09:04,090
I was upset about the
shirt sleeves at first,
209
00:09:04,110 --> 00:09:05,140
But now i'm okay with it.
210
00:09:05,150 --> 00:09:07,040
Michael,i want you to
stop pestering my salesmen,
211
00:09:07,050 --> 00:09:08,680
And i want you to leave
dunder mifflin alone.
212
00:09:08,690 --> 00:09:10,780
Do you understand?
213
00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:16,130
I...understand...nothing.
214
00:09:21,410 --> 00:09:22,690
Wow. Michael,are you all right?
215
00:09:22,700 --> 00:09:24,100
It was a setup.
216
00:09:24,110 --> 00:09:25,980
Dwight told charles. He told him.
217
00:09:25,990 --> 00:09:28,120
Tell us what you're talking about.
218
00:09:29,000 --> 00:09:32,260
It's like a girl says
she'll make out with you,
219
00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:34,500
But then her boyfriend is
waiting around the corner
220
00:09:34,510 --> 00:09:36,560
With a pee-Filled balloon.
221
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:39,470
Wcan't help you if you don't
just tell us what happened.
222
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,920
I got hit in the face with
a pee-Filled water balloon,
223
00:09:41,930 --> 00:09:43,240
Pam,okay?
224
00:09:43,250 --> 00:09:44,520
I don't know how they did it.
225
00:09:44,540 --> 00:09:45,860
They filled the balloon with pee.
226
00:09:45,870 --> 00:09:48,200
A funnel? I don't know.
227
00:09:48,210 --> 00:09:50,350
Is that clear enough for you?
228
00:09:52,920 --> 00:09:54,320
Hey,jim.
229
00:09:54,650 --> 00:09:57,270
I just totally blew a sales call.
230
00:09:58,000 --> 00:09:59,450
Bro,i do that all the time.
231
00:09:59,460 --> 00:10:01,280
Yeah,well,with you it's different,okay?
232
00:10:01,290 --> 00:10:02,930
'Cause
i just--
233
00:10:03,050 --> 00:10:04,020
I just suck.
234
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,460
I just--
I suck!
235
00:10:05,470 --> 00:10:08,010
Tuna,be nice to my friend jim,okay?
236
00:10:08,020 --> 00:10:09,790
Why? When i look in the mirror,
237
00:10:09,800 --> 00:10:11,800
I don't like the face that looks back.
238
00:10:11,810 --> 00:10:14,680
Well,so what? Your body's a ten.
239
00:10:14,690 --> 00:10:16,060
- Forget it.
- Jim.
240
00:10:16,070 --> 00:10:18,090
I said forget it.
241
00:10:25,580 --> 00:10:28,560
- Dwight schrute.
- Hello,traitor.
242
00:10:29,690 --> 00:10:31,610
I think you have the
wrong number,michael.
243
00:10:31,620 --> 00:10:34,910
I want you to listen to me,friend,
244
00:10:34,930 --> 00:10:37,350
And i want you to listen to me good.
245
00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:40,430
I am going to come at you,
246
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:43,800
And i'm going to come at you hard.
247
00:10:43,810 --> 00:10:46,580
I'm going to steal all of your clients,
248
00:10:46,600 --> 00:10:49,180
And then i am going to
kill them in front of you.
249
00:10:49,190 --> 00:10:49,970
Michael.
250
00:10:49,980 --> 00:10:52,330
- I'm just getting hardcore with him.
- Finally.
251
00:10:52,340 --> 00:10:54,640
Yes,and hear me,dwight,
252
00:10:54,650 --> 00:10:56,790
When i say i brought you into this rld,
253
00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:58,820
And i can take you out.
254
00:10:58,840 --> 00:11:00,610
Bill cosby.
255
00:11:02,840 --> 00:11:04,030
Mr. Schofield,please.
256
00:11:04,040 --> 00:11:06,160
- He's in a meeting.
- Damn it!
257
00:11:06,170 --> 00:11:07,300
Is mr. Schofield there?
258
00:11:07,310 --> 00:11:09,370
If you'd like to reach an outside line,
259
00:11:09,380 --> 00:11:11,450
Please dial nine first.
260
00:11:11,540 --> 00:11:14,490
So,you think michael's
going after the whal huh?
261
00:11:14,500 --> 00:11:16,870
I have a long relationship
with harper collins publishers
262
00:11:16,880 --> 00:11:18,050
And mr. Schofield.
263
00:11:18,060 --> 00:11:19,000
I'm not worried.
264
00:11:19,010 --> 00:11:20,330
You sound worried.
265
00:11:20,350 --> 00:11:21,760
And you have bad skin.
266
00:11:21,770 --> 00:11:24,780
Oh,look,everyone,we're
all making observations!
267
00:11:28,090 --> 00:11:29,210
Well,if yocould do me a big favor
268
00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:32,140
And tell mr. Schofield that
michael scott has tickets
269
00:11:32,150 --> 00:11:35,080
To the wilkes-Barre
penguins game this weekend,
270
00:11:35,090 --> 00:11:37,520
And if he would like to join me...
271
00:11:38,660 --> 00:11:40,260
Hello,daniel. How are you?
272
00:11:41,390 --> 00:11:44,030
I sure do. Yes.
273
00:11:44,150 --> 00:11:46,210
Wantedo thase k,of
ficedid kathy ever make jv?
274
00:11:46,220 --> 00:11:48,820
Look at that old dude
and his rolodex go.
275
00:11:48,830 --> 00:11:51,990
I spent a month putting that
rolodex on his blackberry,
276
00:11:52,010 --> 00:11:53,530
Which he now uses as a nightlight.
277
00:11:53,540 --> 00:11:55,040
Wow. High score?
278
00:11:55,050 --> 00:11:58,430
And no,i cannot lower my current prices.
279
00:11:58,560 --> 00:11:59,970
Hold on.
280
00:12:00,170 --> 00:12:01,000
Hello?
281
00:12:01,020 --> 00:12:03,740
Mr. Schofield,thank you so much
for taking the time to talk.
282
00:12:03,750 --> 00:12:07,450
I wanted to discuss
your contract with us--
283
00:12:08,520 --> 00:12:11,250
Oh,you're considering him.
284
00:12:12,310 --> 00:12:14,560
I thought michael scott
left the paper business
285
00:12:14,580 --> 00:12:16,200
After his nervous breakdown.
286
00:12:16,210 --> 00:12:18,410
Michael has been talking
to my biggest client.
287
00:12:18,420 --> 00:12:20,230
Master and apprentice
288
00:12:20,250 --> 00:12:21,600
Pitted against one another
289
00:12:21,610 --> 00:12:25,250
For the fate of the greater
scranton area paper market.
290
00:12:25,870 --> 00:12:29,470
So it's not exactly
likehighlander,but still.
291
00:12:33,320 --> 00:12:35,310
Hello,dwight. I've been
expecting your call.
292
00:12:35,320 --> 00:12:36,360
What do you want?
293
00:12:36,370 --> 00:12:39,540
I would like to arrange a truce.
294
00:12:39,560 --> 00:12:42,400
So you heard schofield
is considering a switch,
295
00:12:42,410 --> 00:12:43,770
And you want mercy?
296
00:12:43,780 --> 00:12:45,650
Meet me in our spot in four minutes.
297
00:12:45,660 --> 00:12:47,880
No. No. You think i'm
going to fall for that?
298
00:12:47,890 --> 00:12:49,490
- There's no
- Michael.
299
00:12:49,500 --> 00:12:52,200
Meet-- Okay,go
to the spot,
300
00:12:52,210 --> 00:12:53,560
And then walk 100 feet.
301
00:12:53,580 --> 00:12:55,240
In which direction?
302
00:12:55,250 --> 00:12:56,390
Toward the sun.
303
00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,670
- At what time?
- Noon.
304
00:12:58,770 --> 00:13:00,530
That-- You have
two seconds.
305
00:13:05,110 --> 00:13:06,970
Michael.
306
00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:11,140
Sorry.
307
00:13:11,150 --> 00:13:12,720
Dwight.
308
00:13:12,720 --> 00:13:13,180
Michael.
309
00:13:13,190 --> 00:13:16,160
I hope you're not
recording this conversation.
310
00:13:19,170 --> 00:13:20,950
Good.
311
00:13:21,010 --> 00:13:23,600
I cannot believe that
y sided with charles.
312
00:13:23,610 --> 00:13:25,640
You were making me do things
that were not all right.
313
00:13:25,650 --> 00:13:27,900
So you just rat me out?
You could have said no.
314
00:13:27,910 --> 00:13:29,380
And not come through for you?
315
00:13:29,390 --> 00:13:30,400
If you want a truce,
316
00:13:30,410 --> 00:13:32,160
I will give you a truce.
317
00:13:32,170 --> 00:13:34,200
- I want a truce.
- I do too.
318
00:13:34,210 --> 00:13:37,270
Let me take you and your whole
company out for lunch at alfredo's.
319
00:13:37,280 --> 00:13:38,470
Cooper's.
320
00:13:38,480 --> 00:13:39,970
I had fish yesterday.
321
00:13:39,980 --> 00:13:41,470
Damn it.
322
00:13:43,340 --> 00:13:44,680
Dwight-Elicious. Where you at?
323
00:13:44,690 --> 00:13:46,020
Oh,hi,michael.
324
00:13:46,030 --> 00:13:47,430
I'm so sorry i'm late.
325
00:13:47,450 --> 00:13:49,320
I got stuck in traffic.
326
00:13:49,330 --> 00:13:51,400
Really? That's weird. We didn't see any.
327
00:13:51,410 --> 00:13:53,200
- I hit a bear.
- What?
328
00:13:53,210 --> 00:13:54,780
He's technically fine.
329
00:13:54,790 --> 00:13:56,250
I imine the true horror will be
330
00:13:56,260 --> 00:13:58,280
When he wakes up in a zoo.
331
00:13:59,040 --> 00:14:00,370
Hey,listen,will you do me a favor
332
00:14:00,380 --> 00:14:02,980
And order the meatball parm for me,
333
00:14:02,990 --> 00:14:04,850
- With extra cheese?
- Yeah,sure.
334
00:14:04,860 --> 00:14:07,630
Good. I will see you
very soon,all right?
335
00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:09,510
Okay. See you in a bit.
336
00:14:12,590 --> 00:14:15,330
Dwight hit a bear.
He'll be here in a sec.
337
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,240
- Sounds neat.
- We can spend a couple days there.
338
00:14:19,250 --> 00:14:21,810
Oh,my god,i think we've been robbed.
339
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:28,120
Did you enjoy your lunch?
340
00:14:28,210 --> 00:14:29,640
Dwight,not now. We've en robbed.
341
00:14:29,650 --> 00:14:32,600
No,michael,you were sabotaged.
342
00:14:32,610 --> 00:14:35,080
No,dwight,we were robbed.
343
00:14:35,100 --> 00:14:36,170
How would you even know?
344
00:14:36,180 --> 00:14:38,610
You're still stuck in traffic.
345
00:14:40,740 --> 00:14:42,210
You?
346
00:14:42,220 --> 00:14:43,550
Me.
347
00:14:43,560 --> 00:14:45,190
What about our truce?
348
00:14:45,200 --> 00:14:45,840
I broke it.
349
00:14:45,850 --> 00:14:47,450
- On purpose?
- Yes.
350
00:14:47,460 --> 00:14:48,060
Why?
351
00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:49,560
You think this is some kind of game?
352
00:14:49,570 --> 00:14:51,140
No,this is a war,
353
00:14:51,150 --> 00:14:52,030
And i will not stop.
354
00:14:52,050 --> 00:14:53,020
I will not rest.
355
00:14:53,030 --> 00:14:55,560
You have no idea what kind
of enemy you've created.
356
00:14:55,570 --> 00:14:57,690
You have unleashed the wolf!
357
00:14:57,700 --> 00:14:59,330
Be that as it may,
358
00:14:59,340 --> 00:15:04,270
I have your meatball parm sandwich here,
359
00:15:04,460 --> 00:15:05,770
And i am going to eat it.
360
00:15:05,790 --> 00:15:07,380
And i knew that you would do that.
361
00:15:07,390 --> 00:15:11,740
Their meatball parm is
their worst sandwich.
362
00:15:11,750 --> 00:15:13,230
Oh.
363
00:15:13,720 --> 00:15:15,640
Bastard!
364
00:15:19,710 --> 00:15:20,970
Hi there. Dwight schrute here.
365
00:15:20,990 --> 00:15:23,390
I was just calling to
see if michael scott paper
366
00:15:23,400 --> 00:15:25,740
Was meeting all of your paper needs,
367
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:28,800
And how is brenda,age four,ponytail,
368
00:15:28,810 --> 00:15:30,940
And simon,age seven?
369
00:15:32,300 --> 00:15:33,750
Oh,you don't say.
370
00:15:33,760 --> 00:15:36,110
Schrute,dwight.
371
00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:37,630
And on the back he wrote,
372
00:15:37,640 --> 00:15:40,670
"Great salesman,better friend."
373
00:15:43,720 --> 00:15:46,620
"Tall" and "beets."
374
00:15:46,760 --> 00:15:49,580
And say hello to cheri,
375
00:15:49,590 --> 00:15:52,800
Who is your black wife.
376
00:15:58,680 --> 00:16:00,410
I see you're begging for mercy,huh?
377
00:16:00,430 --> 00:16:02,550
Well,you will find none here.
378
00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:03,850
Dwight,do you mind if we talk?
379
00:16:03,870 --> 00:16:06,150
Sure. That'd be fine.
380
00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:07,570
If you keep coming after us,
381
00:16:07,580 --> 00:16:10,560
The michael scott paper
company cannot succeed.
382
00:16:10,580 --> 00:16:12,940
This is war,and that is what happens.
383
00:16:12,950 --> 00:16:14,920
Oh,one more thing.
384
00:16:14,940 --> 00:16:16,680
I'm going to have you listen
385
00:16:16,690 --> 00:16:18,370
While i ea your biggest client.
386
00:16:18,380 --> 00:16:20,470
Oh,no. No,no,no,no.
387
00:16:20,470 --> 00:16:23,680
Oh,uh,oh,i'm turning you down right now.
388
00:16:23,690 --> 00:16:25,290
You can hear me,but i can't hear you.
389
00:16:25,300 --> 00:16:27,190
Mr. Schofield's re ady
to see you now,mr. Scott.
390
00:16:27,200 --> 00:16:29,260
Oh,great. Mr. Schofield's
ready to see me.
391
00:16:29,270 --> 00:16:30,140
Thank you so much.
392
00:16:30,150 --> 00:16:31,330
Don't let him in! He's a traitor!
393
00:16:31,340 --> 00:16:33,160
Michael! Walking in the door...
394
00:16:33,180 --> 00:16:34,430
Michael. Good to see you.
395
00:16:34,450 --> 00:16:36,970
Mr. Schofield,good to see you.
396
00:16:37,440 --> 00:16:41,060
And i'm closing the door.
397
00:16:43,070 --> 00:16:44,680
Now,when dwight tells you
398
00:16:44,690 --> 00:16:47,570
That he will keep
prices steady for a year,
399
00:16:47,590 --> 00:16:49,570
I think he is speaking out of turn.
400
00:16:49,580 --> 00:16:50,890
- Really?
- Yes.
401
00:16:50,900 --> 00:16:53,160
He does not have the
authority to say that.
402
00:16:53,170 --> 00:16:54,310
I,on the other hand,
403
00:16:54,320 --> 00:16:57,080
Am the president,the
owner,and the founder.
404
00:16:57,090 --> 00:16:59,180
It is like you are buying
software from bill ges.
405
00:16:59,190 --> 00:17:02,030
Are you saying you invented paper?
406
00:17:02,930 --> 00:17:04,960
Okay,okay.
407
00:17:04,970 --> 00:17:05,940
Oh,god.
408
00:17:05,950 --> 00:17:07,840
Okay,tuna.
409
00:17:09,390 --> 00:17:11,030
- Hey,guys.
- Hey.
410
00:17:11,040 --> 00:17:12,540
Hello.
411
00:17:12,550 --> 00:17:14,360
Excuse me,can i have
your attention,everyone?
412
00:17:14,370 --> 00:17:15,360
He's the deal,everybody.
413
00:17:15,370 --> 00:17:19,250
Jim halpert is very upset and disturbed.
414
00:17:19,260 --> 00:17:20,430
I don't know if it
was something you did,
415
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,290
Something you said,a look you have him.
416
00:17:22,300 --> 00:17:23,630
Maybe it was nothing at all,
417
00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:25,440
But here's the deal,okay?
418
00:17:25,450 --> 00:17:26,430
It stops now.
419
00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:27,880
I guess i could be nicer.
420
00:17:27,890 --> 00:17:30,040
Andy,i think jim is messing with you.
421
00:17:30,050 --> 00:17:32,040
Oh,really?
422
00:17:35,370 --> 00:17:36,510
- Okay.
- Yeah,okay,
423
00:17:36,520 --> 00:17:38,230
What the heck is happenin' here?
424
00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:39,890
Two things i need you to understand.
425
00:17:39,910 --> 00:17:42,300
One,pam and i are very happy together,
426
00:17:42,310 --> 00:17:44,510
- Uh,that's not what was
- And two,
427
00:17:45,030 --> 00:17:47,610
That stuff that happened with
you and angela is a bummer,
428
00:17:47,630 --> 00:17:49,450
Ani ow that you don't think you're
ever gonna find someone else,
429
00:17:49,460 --> 00:17:50,660
But you will.
430
00:17:50,670 --> 00:17:53,350
I promise you. You will.
431
00:17:58,370 --> 00:18:00,780
Oh,man. He got me so good.
432
00:18:03,620 --> 00:18:05,740
I learned something about myself today.
433
00:18:07,510 --> 00:18:08,370
I wish this was a sofa,
434
00:18:08,390 --> 00:18:10,960
'Cause i feel like i could
sit here and talk for hours.
435
00:18:11,100 --> 00:18:13,690
What is that thing
that dwight always says?
436
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:18,860
Paper is the soil in which
the seeds of business grow?
437
00:18:18,870 --> 00:18:19,860
It's not the soil!
438
00:18:19,870 --> 00:18:22,390
It's the manur paper is the manure!
439
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:25,370
On-Time delivery is the soil!
440
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:39,040
- Uh,hel,dwight.
- Spin move.
441
00:18:41,690 --> 00:18:44,000
April 13th,2002.
442
00:18:44,010 --> 00:18:45,440
Dwight,i'm in a meeting.
443
00:18:45,450 --> 00:18:46,740
That's very rude.
444
00:18:46,750 --> 00:18:48,520
I barge because i care.
445
00:18:48,530 --> 00:18:50,240
April 13th,2002,
446
00:18:50,250 --> 00:18:53,400
That is the date when you
tried to switch paper providers
447
00:18:53,410 --> 00:18:55,450
Foan obscure sociology textbook,
448
00:18:55,460 --> 00:18:57,070
But were hung out to dry
449
00:18:57,080 --> 00:18:59,650
When the price of
glossy stock increased.
450
00:18:59,670 --> 00:19:01,190
Maybe we should schedule
a meeting on our--
451
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:03,110
La,la,la. Continuing.
452
00:19:03,120 --> 00:19:04,410
Notice my persistence and recall.
453
00:19:04,420 --> 00:19:05,340
Continuing!
454
00:19:05,350 --> 00:19:06,890
You called dunder mifflin,
455
00:19:06,900 --> 00:19:08,310
And your order was filled
456
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:09,490
Within an hour!
457
00:19:09,500 --> 00:19:12,520
I'm going to pull a date
ouof the air right now.
458
00:19:12,830 --> 00:19:15,150
April 13th,2002.
459
00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:16,690
That is the last day
460
00:19:16,700 --> 00:19:19,070
That you evaluated your paper needs.
461
00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:20,440
Is it not?
462
00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,510
We all know that the economy is bad,
463
00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:24,350
And bloated companies
like dunder mifflin...
464
00:19:24,360 --> 00:19:26,590
- Come on.
- ...are going to fall by the wayside.
465
00:19:26,600 --> 00:19:29,580
Two of their branches have
closed within the last year.
466
00:19:29,590 --> 00:19:31,810
The michael scott paper company however,
467
00:19:31,820 --> 00:19:33,920
Has opened a new branch this very month.
468
00:19:33,930 --> 00:19:37,330
What he's not telling you
is that he will abandon you.
469
00:19:37,610 --> 00:19:40,060
Why don't you guys just
email me your best offers,
470
00:19:40,070 --> 00:19:41,510
And we can finish it up that way.
471
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:43,790
That sounds like a fantastic idea.
472
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:45,300
I will see you this
weekend for the penguins.
473
00:19:45,310 --> 00:19:46,820
Box seats as usual.
474
00:19:46,830 --> 00:19:47,230
Uh,okay. Sure.
475
00:19:47,240 --> 00:19:49,100
- Good,good,good.
- I will see you.
476
00:19:49,110 --> 00:19:51,140
Thank you,mr. Schofield,for your time.
477
00:19:51,150 --> 00:19:52,230
Much appreciated.
478
00:19:52,240 --> 00:19:54,000
Oh,and tell me,um,
479
00:19:54,620 --> 00:19:56,850
How's your gay son?
480
00:19:57,170 --> 00:19:59,500
Excuse me?
481
00:20:01,590 --> 00:20:03,280
I color code all my info.
482
00:20:03,290 --> 00:20:04,730
I wrote "gay son" in green.
483
00:20:04,740 --> 00:20:06,060
Green means go,
484
00:20:06,070 --> 00:20:08,590
So i know to go ahead
and shut up about it.
485
00:20:08,600 --> 00:20:11,580
Orange means "orange you
glad you didn't bring it up?"
486
00:20:11,830 --> 00:20:13,880
Most colors mean "don't say it."
487
00:20:14,170 --> 00:20:17,900
How is tom,the homosexual sophomore?
488
00:20:18,570 --> 00:20:21,180
I wanted to start a company,not a war,
489
00:20:21,430 --> 00:20:23,600
Because in a war,
490
00:20:23,610 --> 00:20:26,920
You always fight those
you are closest to.
491
00:20:26,930 --> 00:20:29,720
And the great tragedy of the civil war
492
00:20:29,730 --> 00:20:31,750
Is that brother fought ainst brother.
493
00:20:31,760 --> 00:20:34,370
For what? What purpose did that serve?
494
00:20:34,390 --> 00:20:36,680
Apart from abolishing slavery?
495
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,640
In that case,war was the right choice.
496
00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:42,110
This doesn't feel as important,though.
497
00:20:42,970 --> 00:20:45,510
That's just how the world works,i guess.
498
00:20:46,790 --> 00:20:49,570
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499
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the.Office
season5 episode22
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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