1
00:00:00,625 --> 00:00:03,093
For 20 bucks,
I'll tell you what happened
2
00:00:03,127 --> 00:00:05,195
last week on Shameless.
3
00:00:05,229 --> 00:00:06,697
Thanks.
4
00:00:06,731 --> 00:00:08,331
You're gonna have to have
an abortion.
5
00:00:08,366 --> 00:00:09,766
Hell, no.
I'm not aborting my baby.
6
00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:10,967
Ourbaby.
7
00:00:11,002 --> 00:00:12,169
You need to call your family.
8
00:00:12,203 --> 00:00:13,437
Your dad's dying, Ian.
9
00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:17,274
Fuck. Ian.
10
00:00:17,308 --> 00:00:18,475
We're down to two babies.
11
00:00:18,509 --> 00:00:20,310
- What happened?
- Huey ate Dewey.
12
00:00:20,344 --> 00:00:22,612
- You almost killed Liam.
- I didn't do it on purpose.
13
00:00:22,647 --> 00:00:24,848
- Yeah, but you did it.
- I'm not guilty!
14
00:00:24,882 --> 00:00:26,316
Liam almost died!
15
00:00:26,350 --> 00:00:27,617
I heard you talk about
my little brother Liam
16
00:00:27,652 --> 00:00:28,852
on the bus this morning.
17
00:00:28,886 --> 00:00:30,787
Both: Cocaine baby brother.
18
00:00:30,822 --> 00:00:33,790
[Grunts]
Oh, fuck.
19
00:00:33,825 --> 00:00:36,326
I could watch Liam for you
if you wanted.
20
00:00:36,360 --> 00:00:39,496
I'll send you a text picture
every 30 minutes.
21
00:00:39,530 --> 00:00:40,864
- I need a gun.
- Who you gonna kill?
22
00:00:40,898 --> 00:00:42,632
Alibi got robbed.
23
00:00:42,667 --> 00:00:43,700
They stole the keg
that I keep the money in.
24
00:00:43,735 --> 00:00:45,068
[Gun cocks]
25
00:00:45,103 --> 00:00:46,503
We can't be boyfriend
and girlfriend.
26
00:00:46,537 --> 00:00:48,238
Why are you breaking up
with me?
27
00:00:48,272 --> 00:00:49,673
Because you're too young.
28
00:00:49,707 --> 00:00:51,241
Get the fuck out of my house.
29
00:00:51,275 --> 00:00:54,077
[Glass shatters]
30
00:00:54,112 --> 00:00:55,812
Is Sheila gonna be mad at me?
31
00:00:55,847 --> 00:00:56,913
She's out of town.
32
00:00:56,948 --> 00:00:58,148
With this plea agreement,
33
00:00:58,182 --> 00:00:59,416
you will be a felon.
34
00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:00,417
You will be under house arrest
35
00:01:00,451 --> 00:01:01,718
until further notice.
36
00:01:01,753 --> 00:01:02,853
How do you plead to possession
37
00:01:02,887 --> 00:01:04,387
and child endangerment?
38
00:01:04,422 --> 00:01:05,722
I'm guilty.
39
00:01:07,311 --> 00:01:09,288
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
40
00:01:13,804 --> 00:01:17,239
♪ think of all the luck
you got ♪
41
00:01:17,274 --> 00:01:20,209
♪ know that
it's not for naught ♪
42
00:01:20,243 --> 00:01:23,479
♪ you were beaming
once before ♪
43
00:01:23,513 --> 00:01:27,717
♪ but it's not like that
anymore ♪
44
00:01:27,751 --> 00:01:31,087
♪ what is this downside ♪
45
00:01:31,121 --> 00:01:34,557
♪ that you speak of? ♪
46
00:01:34,591 --> 00:01:36,759
♪ what is this feeling ♪
47
00:01:36,793 --> 00:01:41,397
♪ you're so sure of? ♪
48
00:01:41,431 --> 00:01:48,304
♪ ♪
49
00:01:48,338 --> 00:01:51,474
♪ round up the friends
you got ♪
50
00:01:51,508 --> 00:01:54,677
♪ know that
they're not for naught ♪
51
00:01:54,711 --> 00:01:57,980
♪ you were willing
once before ♪
52
00:01:58,015 --> 00:02:02,184
♪ but it's not like that
anymore ♪
53
00:02:02,219 --> 00:02:05,588
♪ what is this downside ♪
54
00:02:05,622 --> 00:02:09,291
♪ that you speak of? ♪
55
00:02:09,326 --> 00:02:11,260
♪ what is this feeling ♪
56
00:02:11,294 --> 00:02:14,830
♪ you're so sure of? ♪
57
00:02:16,733 --> 00:02:19,702
[Gauntlet Hair's Human Nature]
58
00:02:19,736 --> 00:02:27,743
♪ ♪
59
00:02:40,757 --> 00:02:43,826
♪ when it comes out
it's all I see ♪
60
00:02:43,860 --> 00:02:48,731
♪ that's when you tell me
it's just your human nature ♪
61
00:02:48,765 --> 00:02:53,035
♪ ♪
62
00:02:53,070 --> 00:02:56,205
♪ when it comes out
it's all I see ♪
63
00:02:56,239 --> 00:03:01,010
♪ and that's when you tell me
it's just your human nature ♪
64
00:03:01,044 --> 00:03:05,981
♪ ♪
65
00:03:06,016 --> 00:03:10,152
♪ yeah ♪
66
00:03:10,187 --> 00:03:16,258
♪ it's just your human nature ♪
67
00:03:16,293 --> 00:03:20,896
[Alarm clock buzzing]
68
00:03:20,931 --> 00:03:22,598
♪ ♪
69
00:03:22,632 --> 00:03:25,901
♪ one time a week ♪
70
00:03:25,936 --> 00:03:30,339
♪ one time a week ♪
71
00:03:30,373 --> 00:03:33,509
♪ when it comes out
it's all I see ♪
72
00:03:33,543 --> 00:03:38,180
♪ that's when you tell me
it's just your human nature ♪
73
00:03:38,215 --> 00:03:43,452
♪ ♪
74
00:03:43,487 --> 00:03:47,389
♪ yeah ♪
75
00:03:47,424 --> 00:03:48,924
♪ it's just your human... ♪
76
00:03:48,959 --> 00:03:53,262
♪ and you tell me
I make you smile ♪
77
00:03:53,296 --> 00:03:56,398
♪ one time a week ♪
78
00:03:56,433 --> 00:04:01,036
♪ one time a week ♪
79
00:04:01,071 --> 00:04:05,608
♪ and you tell me
I make you smile ♪
80
00:04:05,642 --> 00:04:08,077
♪ one time a week ♪
81
00:04:08,111 --> 00:04:12,548
♪ ♪
82
00:04:15,785 --> 00:04:18,787
Do you have any sanitary pads?
83
00:04:18,822 --> 00:04:20,422
You got your period?
That's wonderful.
84
00:04:20,457 --> 00:04:23,259
I don't want
to talk about it. Ever.
85
00:04:23,293 --> 00:04:24,827
I get it.
I get it.
86
00:04:24,861 --> 00:04:26,095
We have some tampons
87
00:04:26,129 --> 00:04:27,730
in the upstairs bathroom
under the sink.
88
00:04:27,764 --> 00:04:29,265
Do you need me
to walk you through any--
89
00:04:29,299 --> 00:04:30,633
No. Nope.
90
00:04:30,667 --> 00:04:32,268
Why are you baking
at 7:00 AM?
91
00:04:32,302 --> 00:04:34,103
'Cause my probation officer's
coming today
92
00:04:34,137 --> 00:04:36,772
and I'm freaking out.
Is your room clean?
93
00:04:36,806 --> 00:04:38,407
Why does my room
need to be clean?
94
00:04:38,441 --> 00:04:40,009
'Cause she's gonna
tear the joint apart
95
00:04:40,043 --> 00:04:41,911
looking for anything
that can get me in trouble.
96
00:04:41,945 --> 00:04:44,146
I only have, like, clothes
and school stuff and makeup.
97
00:04:44,181 --> 00:04:45,681
Debs, just do me
this one favor, okay?
98
00:04:45,715 --> 00:04:47,316
I can't take any chances.
99
00:04:47,350 --> 00:04:48,817
Well, I'm not the one
who left the cocaine out.
100
00:04:48,852 --> 00:04:50,152
Do it.
101
00:04:50,187 --> 00:04:53,622
God.
102
00:04:53,657 --> 00:04:54,857
Hungry.
103
00:04:54,891 --> 00:04:57,259
We have half a bag of cereal,
104
00:04:57,294 --> 00:04:59,094
two packs of oatmeal,
and four frozen waffles.
105
00:04:59,129 --> 00:05:00,829
You need to clean your room
before school.
106
00:05:00,864 --> 00:05:03,532
Get rid of anything that can
make me look like a bad parent.
107
00:05:03,567 --> 00:05:05,000
Go. Now.
108
00:05:05,035 --> 00:05:06,001
Those are for my PO.
109
00:05:06,036 --> 00:05:09,872
Upstairs.
110
00:05:09,906 --> 00:05:11,540
[Sighs]
111
00:05:11,575 --> 00:05:13,375
Are you dead?
112
00:05:13,410 --> 00:05:16,545
[Groans] Not a chance.
113
00:05:16,580 --> 00:05:18,280
Where were we?
114
00:05:18,315 --> 00:05:21,283
Number nine,
rob a convenience store.
115
00:05:21,318 --> 00:05:23,886
Number ten,
recycle scrap metal.
116
00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:25,621
Number 11, prostitution.
117
00:05:25,655 --> 00:05:27,122
Nix that one.
118
00:05:27,157 --> 00:05:29,558
My thrill drill
is out of juice.
119
00:05:29,593 --> 00:05:31,694
You got to be kidding me!
120
00:05:31,728 --> 00:05:34,029
Number 12, sperm bank.
121
00:05:34,064 --> 00:05:37,466
See number 11.
122
00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:42,304
Some sheik named
Fahid Ahmed Habib or whatever
123
00:05:42,339 --> 00:05:44,139
is getting
a brand-new set of lungs.
124
00:05:44,174 --> 00:05:45,374
Government flew him in.
125
00:05:45,408 --> 00:05:46,976
We get the newspaper?
126
00:05:47,010 --> 00:05:48,043
Sheila does.
127
00:05:48,078 --> 00:05:49,378
Look. Look.
128
00:05:49,412 --> 00:05:51,413
Shaking hands with his surgeon.
129
00:05:51,448 --> 00:05:53,549
Some towelhead gets to
jump the line
130
00:05:53,583 --> 00:05:56,518
just 'cause
he's a "important ally?"
131
00:05:56,553 --> 00:05:59,622
Guy's got eight teenage wives
dressed in tablecloths.
132
00:05:59,656 --> 00:06:00,889
Won't even let 'em drive.
133
00:06:00,924 --> 00:06:02,858
Look, Sammi.
134
00:06:02,892 --> 00:06:04,126
Chuckie and I are trying--
135
00:06:04,160 --> 00:06:05,461
we're-- we're writing--
136
00:06:05,495 --> 00:06:10,299
Ah, fuck it.
Show her, Chuckles.
137
00:06:10,333 --> 00:06:12,201
"Kidnap a walton heir.
138
00:06:12,235 --> 00:06:13,669
Roadside fruit stand.
139
00:06:13,703 --> 00:06:14,670
Contract killer."
140
00:06:14,704 --> 00:06:16,005
What are these?
141
00:06:16,039 --> 00:06:18,340
Ways to make money
for my surgery.
142
00:06:18,375 --> 00:06:19,808
Hey!
[Coughs]
143
00:06:19,843 --> 00:06:22,745
What about an app version
of my book?
144
00:06:22,779 --> 00:06:24,980
The drug book that I'm writing?
145
00:06:25,015 --> 00:06:26,649
[Coughing]
146
00:06:26,683 --> 00:06:30,085
Got to keep hope alive, right?
147
00:06:30,120 --> 00:06:32,087
Easy, honey.
148
00:06:32,122 --> 00:06:36,025
[Loud flatulence]
149
00:06:36,059 --> 00:06:38,060
- [Grunts]
- [Chuckles]
150
00:06:38,094 --> 00:06:40,496
Here's your oxys
and your perkies.
151
00:06:40,530 --> 00:06:43,098
Just like mama used to make.
152
00:06:50,140 --> 00:06:51,840
Whoa, that is bad.
153
00:06:51,875 --> 00:06:53,842
Okay, all you glu-tards
in the house,
154
00:06:53,877 --> 00:06:55,844
wheat-free flapjacks
are ready.
155
00:06:55,879 --> 00:06:57,680
Get them while they suck.
156
00:06:57,714 --> 00:06:58,681
Hey, short-stack!
157
00:06:58,715 --> 00:07:01,116
High five.
158
00:07:01,151 --> 00:07:02,685
What's up with your kid, Phil?
159
00:07:02,719 --> 00:07:04,086
Why's he so damn calm?
160
00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:05,521
Brain damage.
161
00:07:05,555 --> 00:07:06,855
Gotta tell you, man,
162
00:07:06,890 --> 00:07:08,123
I didn't think this was
gonna work out.
163
00:07:08,158 --> 00:07:09,958
- Yeah.
- Adorable.
164
00:07:09,993 --> 00:07:11,360
He yours?
165
00:07:11,394 --> 00:07:12,594
No, brother.
166
00:07:12,629 --> 00:07:14,530
Deadbeat parents and so on.
167
00:07:14,564 --> 00:07:16,532
Aw, so you take care of him?
168
00:07:16,566 --> 00:07:18,567
Yeah. Yeah, no.
I do my best.
169
00:07:18,601 --> 00:07:21,403
Cool.
170
00:07:21,438 --> 00:07:23,272
So enjoy.
[Clears throat]
171
00:07:23,306 --> 00:07:26,108
Ever get a break
from watching him?
172
00:07:26,142 --> 00:07:27,976
Sure, yeah.
Sometimes.
173
00:07:31,014 --> 00:07:32,247
I'm free tomorrow morning.
174
00:07:32,282 --> 00:07:33,482
Around 11:00.
175
00:07:33,516 --> 00:07:35,818
Great.
176
00:07:35,852 --> 00:07:37,152
Bye.
177
00:07:37,187 --> 00:07:39,955
[KC Booker's Lulu]
178
00:07:39,989 --> 00:07:41,123
Hey, what can I get you, sir?
179
00:07:41,157 --> 00:07:43,659
♪ mm ♪
180
00:07:43,693 --> 00:07:46,962
♪ eh, oh, eh, oh, eh, oh,
eh, yeah ♪
181
00:07:46,996 --> 00:07:49,965
♪ ♪
182
00:07:49,999 --> 00:07:52,267
♪ sweet as a golden apple ♪
183
00:07:52,302 --> 00:07:55,437
♪ fallen from
a golden apple tree ♪
184
00:07:55,472 --> 00:07:58,073
♪ ♪
185
00:07:58,108 --> 00:07:59,408
Ugh.
186
00:07:59,442 --> 00:08:00,976
♪ oh, I'd like to take a ride ♪
187
00:08:01,010 --> 00:08:04,480
♪ if she'd only
take a ride on me ♪
188
00:08:04,514 --> 00:08:07,583
Jesus Christ, Carl.
189
00:08:07,617 --> 00:08:09,351
♪ how many mountains
must I climb ♪
190
00:08:09,386 --> 00:08:13,655
♪ before I get a taste
of what I'm due ♪
191
00:08:13,690 --> 00:08:16,291
♪ ♪
192
00:08:16,326 --> 00:08:18,026
♪ yeah ♪
193
00:08:18,061 --> 00:08:20,195
♪ oh! ♪
194
00:08:20,230 --> 00:08:21,497
♪ uh-huh ♪
195
00:08:21,531 --> 00:08:24,967
♪ ♪
196
00:08:30,340 --> 00:08:33,642
♪ ♪
197
00:08:33,676 --> 00:08:35,677
♪ how many weekdays
must I slide ♪
198
00:08:35,712 --> 00:08:39,882
♪ before I get a piece
of what I'm due? ♪
199
00:08:39,916 --> 00:08:41,683
Yes, Deborah?
200
00:08:41,718 --> 00:08:43,152
Can I use the bathroom?
201
00:08:43,186 --> 00:08:44,486
Again?
202
00:08:44,521 --> 00:08:47,723
Girl stuff.
203
00:08:47,757 --> 00:08:49,892
[Sighs]
204
00:08:49,926 --> 00:08:53,295
♪ they call her little Lulu ♪
205
00:08:53,329 --> 00:08:56,498
♪ they call her little Lulu ♪
206
00:08:56,533 --> 00:08:59,868
♪ they call her little Lulu ♪
207
00:08:59,903 --> 00:09:07,142
♪ they call her little Lulu ♪
208
00:09:07,177 --> 00:09:08,510
♪ oh, yeah ♪
209
00:09:08,545 --> 00:09:11,647
So the bedrooms are all clean.
210
00:09:11,681 --> 00:09:13,749
Who else lives in the house?
211
00:09:13,783 --> 00:09:16,652
My two brothers, Carl and Liam,
212
00:09:16,686 --> 00:09:17,920
my sister, Debbie,
213
00:09:17,954 --> 00:09:19,855
and sometimes my brother Lip.
214
00:09:19,889 --> 00:09:21,590
- All younger?
- Yes.
215
00:09:21,624 --> 00:09:24,059
Will they help you
not re-offend?
216
00:09:24,093 --> 00:09:26,595
Well, yeah.
I'm their guardian.
217
00:09:26,629 --> 00:09:28,697
Is the family fully aware
of the crime committed?
218
00:09:28,731 --> 00:09:29,865
Oh, yes.
219
00:09:29,899 --> 00:09:31,333
Do you have plans
220
00:09:31,367 --> 00:09:33,068
to leave the state of Illinois
for any reason?
221
00:09:33,102 --> 00:09:34,069
No.
222
00:09:34,103 --> 00:09:35,370
Are you in possession
223
00:09:35,405 --> 00:09:36,371
of any firearms
or dangerous weapons?
224
00:09:36,406 --> 00:09:37,940
No.
225
00:09:37,974 --> 00:09:39,208
Are you in contact with anyone
who might cause you
226
00:09:39,242 --> 00:09:40,209
to engage in
drug and alcohol abuse?
227
00:09:40,243 --> 00:09:41,276
No.
228
00:09:41,311 --> 00:09:42,578
Is anyone else in the household
229
00:09:42,612 --> 00:09:45,214
in trouble with the law?
230
00:09:45,248 --> 00:09:47,916
Uh, no.
231
00:09:47,951 --> 00:09:51,787
Not-- not in the household.
232
00:09:53,890 --> 00:09:56,058
You must get tired of asking
these questions every day.
233
00:09:56,092 --> 00:09:58,861
Mm.
234
00:09:58,895 --> 00:10:00,529
Do you want a cookie?
235
00:10:00,563 --> 00:10:03,098
I baked them myself.
236
00:10:03,132 --> 00:10:07,636
If you consider squeezing batter
from a tube "baking."
237
00:10:07,670 --> 00:10:09,238
Look, I'm not your friend.
238
00:10:09,272 --> 00:10:10,772
I'm here to make sure
you don't violate
239
00:10:10,807 --> 00:10:12,774
the terms of your probation.
240
00:10:12,809 --> 00:10:15,477
Right.
241
00:10:15,512 --> 00:10:19,147
So when can I get out of here
and start looking for a job?
242
00:10:19,182 --> 00:10:22,150
I'm the sole earner,
and money's pretty tight.
243
00:10:22,185 --> 00:10:24,119
You can't leave the house
until a report is filed.
244
00:10:24,153 --> 00:10:25,621
And how long does that take?
245
00:10:25,655 --> 00:10:28,557
- Five to ten business days.
- Two weeks?
246
00:10:28,591 --> 00:10:31,393
Sometimes quicker,
but I wouldn't count on it.
247
00:10:31,427 --> 00:10:33,195
What happens if I leave?
248
00:10:33,229 --> 00:10:36,431
Does this thing, like, detonate?
249
00:10:36,466 --> 00:10:38,267
If you attempt
to leave the residence,
250
00:10:38,301 --> 00:10:40,536
a radio-frequency transmitter
will send an alert
251
00:10:40,570 --> 00:10:43,572
to our service computer center
and you, Miss Fiona,
252
00:10:43,606 --> 00:10:45,107
will be in deep shit.
253
00:10:45,141 --> 00:10:46,542
I need a urine sample
254
00:10:46,576 --> 00:10:48,377
so that I can test
your system for drugs.
255
00:10:48,411 --> 00:10:49,945
No problem.
256
00:10:54,784 --> 00:10:56,818
And I need to watch.
257
00:10:56,853 --> 00:10:58,420
What?
258
00:10:58,454 --> 00:11:00,055
Me pissing?
259
00:11:00,089 --> 00:11:02,057
To be sure it's yours.
260
00:11:02,091 --> 00:11:04,927
Believe me, I enjoy this
even less than you do.
261
00:11:10,500 --> 00:11:14,903
You need to wipe first.
262
00:11:14,938 --> 00:11:17,406
[Exhales]
263
00:11:19,375 --> 00:11:21,677
[Inhales suddenly]
264
00:11:21,711 --> 00:11:24,680
[Groans]
265
00:11:28,451 --> 00:11:30,752
Morning.
266
00:11:30,787 --> 00:11:34,923
Uh, dobroye utro.
267
00:11:34,958 --> 00:11:36,158
It is afternoon.
268
00:11:36,192 --> 00:11:38,226
You sleep all day.
269
00:11:47,971 --> 00:11:50,973
[Water running]
270
00:12:01,150 --> 00:12:02,684
Oh!
271
00:12:02,719 --> 00:12:03,685
I have baby soon.
272
00:12:03,720 --> 00:12:05,854
- I can not work.
- Jeez.
273
00:12:05,888 --> 00:12:07,623
He must take care of me
and baby.
274
00:12:07,657 --> 00:12:08,857
You go.
275
00:12:08,891 --> 00:12:10,459
We do not need you.
276
00:12:10,493 --> 00:12:12,694
You sleep here
tonight in this house?
277
00:12:12,729 --> 00:12:14,129
I kill you.
278
00:12:14,163 --> 00:12:16,198
I bash your orange head.
279
00:12:16,232 --> 00:12:17,466
Mm-hmm.
280
00:12:17,500 --> 00:12:18,467
Vy ponimayete?
281
00:12:18,501 --> 00:12:20,135
Yeah.
282
00:12:20,169 --> 00:12:23,138
[Kaitlin Riegel's Silhouettes]
283
00:12:33,652 --> 00:12:36,354
♪ oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪
284
00:12:36,388 --> 00:12:37,955
♪ oh ♪
285
00:12:37,989 --> 00:12:40,057
♪ all that's left
of the great indoors ♪
286
00:12:40,092 --> 00:12:44,028
♪ are silhouettes
on wooden floors ♪
287
00:12:46,362 --> 00:12:47,796
[Reverberates lips]
288
00:12:56,939 --> 00:12:59,708
What?
289
00:12:59,742 --> 00:13:01,209
No!
290
00:13:01,244 --> 00:13:03,245
- Come here.
- Oh, my God.
291
00:13:03,279 --> 00:13:04,546
Oh, my God, is this for real?
292
00:13:04,580 --> 00:13:05,547
Are you really back?
293
00:13:05,581 --> 00:13:07,516
For real.
For now.
294
00:13:07,550 --> 00:13:11,019
Oh, my God, you bastard,
I missed you so much.
295
00:13:11,054 --> 00:13:13,388
You're a piece of shit.
You had me so worried.
296
00:13:13,423 --> 00:13:15,023
- Not one call?
- I texted.
297
00:13:15,058 --> 00:13:16,258
Yeah.
Real detailed.
298
00:13:16,292 --> 00:13:17,426
"Miss you guys,
having fun."
299
00:13:17,460 --> 00:13:18,727
I didn't want you to worry.
300
00:13:18,761 --> 00:13:20,028
Well, I worried more, asshole.
301
00:13:20,063 --> 00:13:22,364
Where the hell were you?
302
00:13:22,398 --> 00:13:24,433
The army.
I enlisted.
303
00:13:24,467 --> 00:13:26,201
- The army?
- Yeah.
304
00:13:26,235 --> 00:13:27,302
I wanted to find myself.
305
00:13:27,336 --> 00:13:29,738
Didn't think I could do it here.
306
00:13:29,772 --> 00:13:31,039
Don't you have to be 18?
307
00:13:31,074 --> 00:13:32,040
Don't know, don't care.
308
00:13:32,075 --> 00:13:33,542
I left.
Stuff got nuts.
309
00:13:33,576 --> 00:13:35,410
What "stuff?"
310
00:13:35,445 --> 00:13:37,746
Oh, military trying
to control me.
311
00:13:37,780 --> 00:13:40,549
Well, isn't that
what the military does?
312
00:13:40,583 --> 00:13:43,285
Got sick of it, but, hey,
I met some amazing folks.
313
00:13:43,319 --> 00:13:44,720
Got all these great ideas.
314
00:13:44,754 --> 00:13:47,122
I'm a different person.
315
00:13:47,156 --> 00:13:49,224
Hey, but we can talk about that
later, right?
316
00:13:49,258 --> 00:13:53,595
Sure.
317
00:13:53,629 --> 00:13:54,830
Do you want a sandwich?
318
00:13:54,864 --> 00:13:56,264
Yeah!
Oh, starving.
319
00:13:56,299 --> 00:14:00,235
It's yours.
320
00:14:00,269 --> 00:14:02,070
Nice hardware.
321
00:14:02,105 --> 00:14:03,472
Huh, yeah.
322
00:14:03,506 --> 00:14:05,240
My winter boots don't fit.
323
00:14:05,274 --> 00:14:07,909
All I can get on are
fuck-me pumps and tennis shoes.
324
00:14:07,944 --> 00:14:10,712
[Laughing]
325
00:14:13,116 --> 00:14:14,116
[Chuckles]
Are you okay?
326
00:14:14,150 --> 00:14:18,754
Yeah.
Yeah, great, why?
327
00:14:18,788 --> 00:14:20,088
You seem a little
328
00:14:20,123 --> 00:14:21,089
caffeinated.
329
00:14:21,124 --> 00:14:23,959
I quit smoking.
330
00:14:23,993 --> 00:14:27,329
So what's next for you?
331
00:14:27,363 --> 00:14:29,664
Oh, I've been thinking about
apprenticing
332
00:14:29,699 --> 00:14:30,966
with this electrician I met.
333
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,934
You know,
learn how to wire stuff.
334
00:14:32,969 --> 00:14:34,336
What about high school?
335
00:14:34,370 --> 00:14:35,337
Oh, well,
Frank finished high school.
336
00:14:35,371 --> 00:14:36,371
It worked out great for him.
337
00:14:36,405 --> 00:14:37,672
You have to finish, Ian--
338
00:14:37,707 --> 00:14:39,374
- I don't have to do anything.
339
00:14:39,408 --> 00:14:41,476
I'm done living the way
other people want me to live.
340
00:14:41,511 --> 00:14:45,013
But, hey,
thanks for the sandwich.
341
00:14:48,484 --> 00:14:50,318
Welcome home.
342
00:14:50,353 --> 00:14:54,556
[Country rock music]
343
00:14:54,590 --> 00:14:56,291
Yeah, it's a nice
little piece, you know.
344
00:14:56,325 --> 00:14:58,794
Quick to action, doesn't jam.
345
00:14:58,828 --> 00:15:00,162
Easy, baby.
346
00:15:00,196 --> 00:15:01,496
What else you packing?
347
00:15:01,531 --> 00:15:02,898
What do you mean, like,
dick-wise?
348
00:15:02,932 --> 00:15:04,166
- [Laughs]
- No.
349
00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:05,167
I mean, that's not
350
00:15:05,201 --> 00:15:06,902
your only weapon, is it?
351
00:15:06,936 --> 00:15:08,637
Well, how many guns
does a guy need?
352
00:15:08,671 --> 00:15:10,705
Well, it depends.
353
00:15:10,740 --> 00:15:13,975
If you want to create
the illusion of safety,
354
00:15:14,010 --> 00:15:15,811
then one piece is plenty.
355
00:15:15,845 --> 00:15:17,078
But if you really want
to be ready
356
00:15:17,113 --> 00:15:18,814
in the event of an emergency,
357
00:15:18,848 --> 00:15:20,682
you'll need to step it up.
358
00:15:20,716 --> 00:15:22,250
One for every room
in the house.
359
00:15:22,285 --> 00:15:23,518
One for your car.
360
00:15:23,553 --> 00:15:24,753
One at work.
361
00:15:24,787 --> 00:15:28,256
And at least two on your person.
362
00:15:28,291 --> 00:15:29,724
How many guns do you own?
363
00:15:29,759 --> 00:15:32,761
Um, I got a Bushmaster AR15,
364
00:15:32,795 --> 00:15:35,997
an HK USP .45,
Glock 23 .40 cal,
365
00:15:36,032 --> 00:15:38,099
my Sig Sauer
P226R 9-millimeter,
366
00:15:38,134 --> 00:15:39,401
a Henry .22 Magnum,
367
00:15:39,435 --> 00:15:42,003
a Ruger SP101
3-inch six-shot,
368
00:15:42,038 --> 00:15:44,706
and my Walther P22.
369
00:15:44,740 --> 00:15:45,941
I know a guy.
370
00:15:45,975 --> 00:15:48,109
I can hook you up.
371
00:15:48,144 --> 00:15:51,012
My motto is
prepare and prevent,
372
00:15:51,047 --> 00:15:52,747
don't repair and repent.
373
00:15:52,782 --> 00:15:54,783
The hell is this,
poolside at the Flamingo?
374
00:15:54,817 --> 00:15:56,051
We got a line of clients
upstairs
375
00:15:56,085 --> 00:15:57,419
with their hands
down their pants.
376
00:15:57,453 --> 00:15:59,287
- Go to work.
- [Speaking Russian]
377
00:15:59,322 --> 00:16:01,256
And you, don't think
you're getting off
378
00:16:01,290 --> 00:16:03,592
just 'cause you're about to drop
a patty from your fur-burger.
379
00:16:03,626 --> 00:16:05,227
- "Fur-burger?"
- She won't shave.
380
00:16:05,261 --> 00:16:06,862
- I like the way God made me.
- That's nice.
381
00:16:06,896 --> 00:16:08,463
You're late again,
I'm gonna dock you 50.
382
00:16:08,497 --> 00:16:10,432
- Carrot Boy is gone.
- Who's Carrot Boy?
383
00:16:10,466 --> 00:16:12,300
- He knows who.
- Where'd he go?
384
00:16:12,335 --> 00:16:14,436
I don't know.
I made him leave.
385
00:16:14,470 --> 00:16:16,872
No room for him
when baby comes.
386
00:16:16,906 --> 00:16:21,276
The fuck do I care?
387
00:16:21,310 --> 00:16:22,777
And shave your fucking muff.
388
00:16:24,447 --> 00:16:29,050
[Phone ringing,
indistinct chatter]
389
00:16:29,085 --> 00:16:30,752
Teacher told me
to come down to the office.
390
00:16:30,786 --> 00:16:32,454
I wish I could say
391
00:16:32,488 --> 00:16:34,456
it's a pleasure to see you
again, Mr. Gallagher.
392
00:16:34,490 --> 00:16:35,724
Your handiwork?
393
00:16:35,758 --> 00:16:37,459
I don't want to brag.
394
00:16:37,493 --> 00:16:38,927
We have a problem.
395
00:16:38,961 --> 00:16:39,928
They're the ones
with the problem.
396
00:16:39,962 --> 00:16:40,929
Can't fight for shit.
397
00:16:40,963 --> 00:16:41,963
Why did you assault
398
00:16:41,998 --> 00:16:43,331
all these students?
399
00:16:43,366 --> 00:16:44,666
Talkin' smack about my brother.
400
00:16:44,700 --> 00:16:46,067
All of them?
401
00:16:46,102 --> 00:16:47,969
And that one's got stupid hair.
402
00:16:48,004 --> 00:16:49,671
And that one smells
like bologna farts.
403
00:16:49,705 --> 00:16:51,973
And the one whose hand
you smashed in a locker?
404
00:16:52,008 --> 00:16:54,509
And the one you pushed
down the stairs?
405
00:16:54,543 --> 00:16:56,144
Too short, maybe?
406
00:16:56,178 --> 00:16:57,679
I don't remember.
407
00:16:57,713 --> 00:16:59,981
You're hereby suspended
from school.
408
00:17:00,016 --> 00:17:02,350
8:00 AM Friday morning,
you will come back
409
00:17:02,385 --> 00:17:04,486
with a parent or guardian
and you will apologize
410
00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:07,088
to all these children
in the presence of their parents
411
00:17:07,123 --> 00:17:09,391
or your suspension will last
indefinitely.
412
00:17:09,425 --> 00:17:10,625
- Which means?
- Expulsion.
413
00:17:10,660 --> 00:17:12,160
Which means?
414
00:17:12,194 --> 00:17:13,561
Go home, Carl.
415
00:17:13,596 --> 00:17:15,130
Come back with a parent.
416
00:17:15,164 --> 00:17:17,565
I can't wait to see
who created you.
417
00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:20,568
[Rock music]
418
00:17:20,603 --> 00:17:24,639
♪ ♪
419
00:17:24,674 --> 00:17:27,142
Hey.
420
00:17:27,176 --> 00:17:29,010
- My first class tomorrow
is at 11:30,
421
00:17:29,045 --> 00:17:30,845
so we're gonna stay here
tonight,
422
00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:33,148
and then Friday it's 8:00 AM
so we're gonna stay
423
00:17:33,182 --> 00:17:34,416
at the dorms tomorrow night.
424
00:17:34,450 --> 00:17:35,650
Got it.
Got it.
425
00:17:35,685 --> 00:17:37,585
- Hi! Hi, hi.
- There we go.
426
00:17:37,620 --> 00:17:39,988
- Hi, my big boy.
- Hi.
427
00:17:40,022 --> 00:17:41,256
- Did you miss me today?
- Yeah.
428
00:17:41,290 --> 00:17:43,358
- Oh, you did?
- Yeah.
429
00:17:43,392 --> 00:17:45,493
I missed you too.
430
00:17:45,528 --> 00:17:47,095
Oh, you brought dinner.
That's great.
431
00:17:47,129 --> 00:17:49,965
That means we can move
tonight's mac and cheese
432
00:17:49,999 --> 00:17:53,134
to tomorrow, which gives us
an extra day of food
433
00:17:53,169 --> 00:17:54,135
before we panic.
434
00:17:54,170 --> 00:17:55,437
- Panic?
- Yeah.
435
00:17:55,471 --> 00:17:56,438
I got to pay the heat
and electric
436
00:17:56,472 --> 00:17:57,505
before I buy groceries.
437
00:17:57,540 --> 00:17:58,807
It's pretty bleak.
438
00:17:58,841 --> 00:18:00,375
I got a check coming
from the cups,
439
00:18:00,409 --> 00:18:02,877
but that's gonna cover rent,
and food-wise,
440
00:18:02,912 --> 00:18:05,213
we're low on everything
but macaroni and mayonnaise.
441
00:18:05,247 --> 00:18:06,848
You saved nothing
from your job?
442
00:18:06,882 --> 00:18:09,384
I was trying to catch up
on old bills.
443
00:18:09,418 --> 00:18:11,453
- How'd he do today?
- Yeah, he's fine.
444
00:18:11,487 --> 00:18:12,520
- Carl got suspended.
- What?
445
00:18:12,555 --> 00:18:13,855
Shut up, ass-brain.
446
00:18:13,889 --> 00:18:16,858
- Hi, Lip.
- Hey, kiddo, how are ya?
447
00:18:16,892 --> 00:18:18,893
- Hey, bud.
- Hey.
448
00:18:18,928 --> 00:18:21,329
I need someone to go to school
with me Friday morning
449
00:18:21,364 --> 00:18:22,664
or I'll be expelled.
450
00:18:22,698 --> 00:18:23,798
Well, I can't
leave the house yet.
451
00:18:23,833 --> 00:18:25,200
They need to reschedule.
452
00:18:25,234 --> 00:18:26,201
Did you tell them
I'm stuck at home?
453
00:18:26,235 --> 00:18:27,736
No.
454
00:18:27,770 --> 00:18:29,137
Well, go in tomorrow
and tell them I'm sick.
455
00:18:29,171 --> 00:18:30,638
I have shingles or mono.
456
00:18:30,673 --> 00:18:32,240
I'll take you, bruiser.
What time?
457
00:18:32,274 --> 00:18:34,175
- 8:00 AM.
- Oh, fuck. I got class.
458
00:18:34,210 --> 00:18:35,710
Can you make it a little later,
like, around noon?
459
00:18:35,745 --> 00:18:37,212
No, parents will be there
and stuff.
460
00:18:37,246 --> 00:18:39,514
Hi, new family.
461
00:18:39,548 --> 00:18:40,515
Door was open.
462
00:18:40,549 --> 00:18:42,250
I won't stay long,
463
00:18:42,284 --> 00:18:44,352
just wanted to let you know,
dad's at Sheila's house.
464
00:18:44,387 --> 00:18:46,388
We're living there a bit.
It's a really great place.
465
00:18:46,422 --> 00:18:47,589
Plenty of room, lots of light.
466
00:18:47,623 --> 00:18:49,257
Thanks for the update.
467
00:18:49,291 --> 00:18:51,059
Any of you guys
have any extra cash?
468
00:18:51,093 --> 00:18:52,160
Dad wants money
for his surgery.
469
00:18:52,194 --> 00:18:53,395
Why not get a job?
470
00:18:53,429 --> 00:18:54,529
Right now,
my full-time career
471
00:18:54,563 --> 00:18:55,530
is taking care of our pops
472
00:18:55,564 --> 00:18:56,531
before he goes.
473
00:18:56,565 --> 00:18:57,665
Well, we're broke.
474
00:18:57,700 --> 00:18:58,900
Wish we could help you.
475
00:18:58,934 --> 00:19:00,835
Okay.
Doesn't hurt to ask.
476
00:19:00,870 --> 00:19:03,071
If anyone wants to stop by,
give his morale a boost,
477
00:19:03,105 --> 00:19:04,339
hope can heal.
478
00:19:04,373 --> 00:19:06,107
Oh, yeah, can hope make up
479
00:19:06,142 --> 00:19:07,909
for the years of misery
that he put us through?
480
00:19:07,943 --> 00:19:09,210
Maybe.
Come by.
481
00:19:09,245 --> 00:19:10,712
Find out.
482
00:19:10,746 --> 00:19:12,847
He doesn't deserve
to go out like this.
483
00:19:12,882 --> 00:19:15,417
No one does.
484
00:19:15,451 --> 00:19:17,685
Why not ask Frank to go
to school with you, Carl?
485
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:18,686
Ian here?
486
00:19:18,721 --> 00:19:20,688
He's upstairs.
487
00:19:20,723 --> 00:19:22,857
All: Ian's here?
488
00:19:24,627 --> 00:19:28,496
[Door opens]
489
00:19:28,531 --> 00:19:30,065
[Door closes]
490
00:19:30,099 --> 00:19:32,667
See you left.
Took all your shit.
491
00:19:32,701 --> 00:19:34,936
Your bride threatened me
with a claw hammer.
492
00:19:34,970 --> 00:19:36,337
[Door opens]
493
00:19:36,372 --> 00:19:38,406
- You're back!
- Oh, hey, guys.
494
00:19:38,441 --> 00:19:40,909
Oh, man.
I missed you guys.
495
00:19:40,943 --> 00:19:42,777
[Laughs]
496
00:19:42,812 --> 00:19:44,045
- Hey, man.
- Hey.
497
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:46,414
Come here.
498
00:19:46,449 --> 00:19:48,450
Lip says you stole
a helicopter.
499
00:19:48,484 --> 00:19:49,884
I tried to.
500
00:19:49,919 --> 00:19:51,119
Kind of tipped it.
501
00:19:51,153 --> 00:19:52,854
Blades snapped.
Motor caught fire.
502
00:19:52,888 --> 00:19:54,589
Awesome.
You shoot anyone?
503
00:19:54,623 --> 00:19:56,391
I never left basic.
504
00:19:56,425 --> 00:19:58,126
You can't shoot anyone there?
505
00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,228
You can.
I didn't.
506
00:20:00,262 --> 00:20:01,930
You shot no one.
You flew nothing.
507
00:20:01,964 --> 00:20:03,765
Why'd you even go there
in the first place?
508
00:20:03,799 --> 00:20:06,468
Relationship issues.
509
00:20:06,502 --> 00:20:07,969
Yeah, you okay?
510
00:20:08,003 --> 00:20:10,138
- Yup, all good.
- Cool.
511
00:20:10,172 --> 00:20:12,107
All right. Well, let's go get
some dinner, dorks.
512
00:20:12,141 --> 00:20:13,408
Hey, I'll catch up with you
later, yeah?
513
00:20:13,442 --> 00:20:14,709
- Yeah, later, man.
- All right.
514
00:20:14,743 --> 00:20:17,212
- Come on, let's--
- Go.
515
00:20:17,246 --> 00:20:20,381
[Door closes]
516
00:20:20,416 --> 00:20:21,916
You coming back?
517
00:20:21,951 --> 00:20:23,218
Depends.
518
00:20:23,252 --> 00:20:24,652
Will you suck my dick
whenever I want?
519
00:20:24,687 --> 00:20:26,788
Fuck off.
520
00:20:31,360 --> 00:20:33,428
- What you writing?
- Stuff.
521
00:20:33,462 --> 00:20:35,196
Notes, ideas.
522
00:20:40,102 --> 00:20:43,438
I'll do it.
523
00:20:43,472 --> 00:20:45,940
Do what?
524
00:20:45,975 --> 00:20:47,475
Don't make me say it, asswipe.
525
00:20:47,510 --> 00:20:49,911
Suck my dick.
526
00:20:49,945 --> 00:20:51,646
Whenever I want.
527
00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:54,649
[Up-tempo rock music]
528
00:20:54,683 --> 00:21:02,690
♪ ♪
529
00:21:16,472 --> 00:21:19,340
Peas.
530
00:21:19,375 --> 00:21:21,676
I thought of something.
531
00:21:21,710 --> 00:21:22,977
Be specific.
532
00:21:23,012 --> 00:21:24,379
We could sell the house.
533
00:21:24,413 --> 00:21:26,648
- Which house?
- This one. Sheila's.
534
00:21:26,682 --> 00:21:29,384
We don't have the title.
Sweet potatoes.
535
00:21:29,418 --> 00:21:30,852
Don't need it.
536
00:21:30,886 --> 00:21:33,521
We put a sign out front,
offer way below market,
537
00:21:33,556 --> 00:21:36,491
have people make cash offers
for earnest money.
538
00:21:36,525 --> 00:21:39,027
Wash, rinse, repeat.
539
00:21:39,061 --> 00:21:41,529
"Earnest money"?
Lentils.
540
00:21:41,564 --> 00:21:43,731
They give us
3% of the purchase price,
541
00:21:43,766 --> 00:21:45,400
we say we'll take it
off the market.
542
00:21:45,434 --> 00:21:47,669
We don't, of course.
We just grab the cash.
543
00:21:47,703 --> 00:21:51,206
Do this four or five times,
rake in maybe 11 grand.
544
00:21:51,240 --> 00:21:52,574
Christ on a crumb bun.
545
00:21:52,608 --> 00:21:54,409
I know, right?
546
00:21:54,443 --> 00:21:57,011
Nothing like a major scam
to life a person's spirits.
547
00:21:57,046 --> 00:21:58,513
How do you know all this?
548
00:21:58,547 --> 00:22:00,682
I may have done this
once or twice before
549
00:22:00,716 --> 00:22:04,185
with one or more husbands.
550
00:22:04,220 --> 00:22:06,688
[Sweet light rock music]
551
00:22:06,722 --> 00:22:10,225
You really are a Gallagher.
552
00:22:10,259 --> 00:22:11,993
[Sighs]
553
00:22:12,027 --> 00:22:20,001
♪ ♪
554
00:22:31,547 --> 00:22:34,515
[Locksley's Black Ajax]
555
00:22:34,550 --> 00:22:37,685
♪ ♪
556
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,521
♪ ooh ♪
557
00:22:40,556 --> 00:22:43,458
♪ ooh ♪
558
00:22:43,492 --> 00:22:46,427
♪ ooh ♪
559
00:22:46,462 --> 00:22:49,030
♪ ooh ♪
560
00:22:49,064 --> 00:22:50,698
♪ when all the mas
and the pas ♪
561
00:22:50,733 --> 00:22:52,066
♪ tell 'em please to go away ♪
562
00:22:52,101 --> 00:22:53,935
♪ yeah, when all
the mother... ♪
563
00:22:53,969 --> 00:22:55,703
♪ were coming out to play,
yeah ♪
564
00:22:55,738 --> 00:22:57,939
♪ ooh ♪
565
00:22:57,973 --> 00:23:01,042
♪ that's when I'm rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
566
00:23:01,076 --> 00:23:04,112
♪ you hear me rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
567
00:23:04,146 --> 00:23:07,048
♪ you see me rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
568
00:23:07,082 --> 00:23:10,752
♪ you feel me rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
569
00:23:10,786 --> 00:23:13,655
♪ ooh ♪
570
00:23:13,689 --> 00:23:16,157
♪ ooh ♪
571
00:23:16,191 --> 00:23:17,959
♪ all the fellas call my name ♪
572
00:23:17,993 --> 00:23:19,560
♪ and the girlies
pull my hair ♪
573
00:23:19,595 --> 00:23:21,229
♪ they like my ties
and my shoes ♪
574
00:23:21,263 --> 00:23:22,830
♪ and ...'em if they dare,
now ♪
575
00:23:22,865 --> 00:23:25,233
♪ ooh ♪
576
00:23:25,267 --> 00:23:28,303
♪ 'cause now I'm rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
577
00:23:28,337 --> 00:23:31,906
♪ you hear me rollin' in,
rollin' in ♪
578
00:23:31,940 --> 00:23:35,476
♪ ♪
579
00:24:09,678 --> 00:24:11,179
[Bracelet beeping]
580
00:24:26,528 --> 00:24:28,663
So then my TI comes crashing
through my door, right,
581
00:24:28,697 --> 00:24:29,664
and chases me.
582
00:24:29,698 --> 00:24:30,898
I'm so scared,
583
00:24:30,933 --> 00:24:32,233
I run smack into
a water fountain,
584
00:24:32,267 --> 00:24:33,468
bust it right off the wall.
585
00:24:33,502 --> 00:24:34,469
- What?
- Yeah, I know.
586
00:24:34,503 --> 00:24:35,703
Water sprays everywhere.
587
00:24:35,704 --> 00:24:37,000
And he wakes everyone up
588
00:24:37,039 --> 00:24:38,272
at 2:00 AM in the morning,
589
00:24:38,307 --> 00:24:39,674
forces them
to watch me do push-ups
590
00:24:39,708 --> 00:24:41,709
in the freezing cold water
while singing.
591
00:24:41,744 --> 00:24:43,144
Singing?
592
00:24:43,178 --> 00:24:45,046
♪ well, then it's hi, hi, hey ♪
593
00:24:45,080 --> 00:24:46,681
♪ the army's on its way ♪
594
00:24:46,715 --> 00:24:48,516
♪ count off the cadence
loud and strong ♪
595
00:24:48,550 --> 00:24:50,985
♪ two, three,
for wherever you go ♪
596
00:24:51,019 --> 00:24:52,353
♪ you will always know ♪
597
00:24:52,388 --> 00:24:54,989
♪ that the army
goes marching along ♪
598
00:24:55,023 --> 00:24:57,158
[Laughs]
599
00:24:57,192 --> 00:24:58,459
Hey.
600
00:24:58,494 --> 00:25:00,561
Hey.
601
00:25:00,596 --> 00:25:02,029
Everything okay?
602
00:25:02,064 --> 00:25:03,364
Still in school?
603
00:25:03,399 --> 00:25:05,032
Yeah.
604
00:25:05,067 --> 00:25:09,504
Yeah, it's, um,
it's under control.
605
00:25:09,538 --> 00:25:11,005
Is Mickey here?
606
00:25:11,039 --> 00:25:12,473
Yeah, he's upstairs.
Why?
607
00:25:12,508 --> 00:25:15,009
You always so goddamn noisy
in the morning?
608
00:25:15,043 --> 00:25:16,744
What?
609
00:25:16,779 --> 00:25:17,879
Your wife's water broke.
610
00:25:17,913 --> 00:25:19,213
- Let's go.
- Go where?
611
00:25:19,248 --> 00:25:21,249
- The hospital.
- She's having the baby?
612
00:25:21,283 --> 00:25:22,850
Tell her I said good luck.
613
00:25:22,885 --> 00:25:24,085
What, you're not gonna
go be with her?
614
00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:25,353
Hell, no.
I got work.
615
00:25:25,387 --> 00:25:26,354
It's not the baby's fault
616
00:25:26,388 --> 00:25:27,488
you guys are a shit show.
617
00:25:27,523 --> 00:25:28,523
Yeah, and it's not my fault
618
00:25:28,557 --> 00:25:29,891
the bitch got knocked up.
619
00:25:29,925 --> 00:25:32,026
Who the fuck knows if
it's even mine?
620
00:25:32,060 --> 00:25:35,329
You're an asshole.
621
00:25:35,364 --> 00:25:37,765
Congrats.
622
00:25:37,800 --> 00:25:39,700
Full house, like old times.
623
00:25:39,735 --> 00:25:41,536
Smells good.
Leftovers?
624
00:25:41,570 --> 00:25:43,204
You destroyed my art project.
625
00:25:43,238 --> 00:25:44,739
It's completely ruined.
626
00:25:44,773 --> 00:25:46,541
You're such a bitch!
627
00:25:46,575 --> 00:25:47,542
Whoa, Debbie!
628
00:25:47,576 --> 00:25:48,910
She went into my room,
629
00:25:48,944 --> 00:25:50,611
she trashed all of my stuff,
630
00:25:50,646 --> 00:25:52,413
and she kicked all of my clothes
under the bed.
631
00:25:52,448 --> 00:25:54,182
- I asked you to clean up.
- Did you?
632
00:25:54,216 --> 00:25:55,349
She went through mine too.
633
00:25:55,384 --> 00:25:56,584
She threw away my porn,
634
00:25:56,618 --> 00:25:58,119
my nunchucks, and my taser.
635
00:25:58,153 --> 00:25:59,520
You know how many
police dumpsters
636
00:25:59,555 --> 00:26:00,788
I had to go through
to find that?
637
00:26:00,823 --> 00:26:02,457
I told you to get rid
of that stuff.
638
00:26:02,491 --> 00:26:04,592
I hid it so the stupid PO
wouldn't find it.
639
00:26:04,626 --> 00:26:07,261
Well, luckily, your stupid
sister found it first.
640
00:26:07,296 --> 00:26:10,731
God, maybe next time you'll do
what I ask, both of you.
641
00:26:10,766 --> 00:26:13,201
There's macaroni salad
sandwiches for lunch.
642
00:26:13,235 --> 00:26:14,769
- Extra mayo.
- Don't need it.
643
00:26:14,803 --> 00:26:16,871
- I'm suspended.
- Well, you still need to eat.
644
00:26:16,905 --> 00:26:18,473
Look, we're gonna
get out of here, okay?
645
00:26:18,507 --> 00:26:19,774
We'll be back for dinner
tonight.
646
00:26:19,808 --> 00:26:21,943
Well, Lip,
you can leave Liam here.
647
00:26:21,977 --> 00:26:23,377
- I got him.
- No, I-- Lip.
648
00:26:23,412 --> 00:26:25,913
Look, Fiona,
just get some sleep, okay?
649
00:26:25,948 --> 00:26:27,281
Hang out with V.
650
00:26:27,316 --> 00:26:29,217
Relax, for fuck's sake.
651
00:26:29,251 --> 00:26:31,652
You guys text me
if anything's going on, okay?
652
00:26:31,687 --> 00:26:33,488
Yeah, sure.
Come on, Carl. Let's go.
653
00:26:33,522 --> 00:26:34,922
- Where are you going?
- To Sheila's.
654
00:26:34,957 --> 00:26:36,724
Why?
655
00:26:36,758 --> 00:26:37,892
To see if Frank can take me
to school tomorrow morning.
656
00:26:37,926 --> 00:26:38,993
Well, when will you be back?
657
00:26:39,027 --> 00:26:40,261
Later.
Get off my ass.
658
00:26:40,295 --> 00:26:41,496
Bye, Ian.
659
00:26:41,530 --> 00:26:44,499
Bye, Debs.
660
00:26:47,035 --> 00:26:48,436
Hey.
661
00:26:48,470 --> 00:26:52,874
Want some more?
662
00:26:56,378 --> 00:27:00,081
You got any cash
you could toss my way?
663
00:27:00,115 --> 00:27:01,449
I'm working a double tonight.
664
00:27:01,483 --> 00:27:03,417
- You want to stop by?
- Yeah, sure.
665
00:27:03,452 --> 00:27:05,686
Got nothing better to do than
watch a bunch of pruney queens
666
00:27:05,721 --> 00:27:10,157
slap their sacks
against your ass cheeks.
667
00:27:10,192 --> 00:27:11,826
Shit!
668
00:27:13,295 --> 00:27:15,696
Hey! Guys!
669
00:27:24,239 --> 00:27:27,041
Hi, um, Sheila left me a key.
670
00:27:27,075 --> 00:27:29,110
I'm so glad you came.
Welcome.
671
00:27:29,144 --> 00:27:30,478
Supposed to water the plants.
672
00:27:30,512 --> 00:27:32,480
Why is there a for sale sign
out front?
673
00:27:32,514 --> 00:27:34,815
Dad, Debbie and Carl are here.
674
00:27:34,850 --> 00:27:36,551
Can you come with me
to school tomorrow morning?
675
00:27:36,585 --> 00:27:40,221
Have to cancel my morning
spin class.
676
00:27:40,255 --> 00:27:41,489
What's up?
677
00:27:41,523 --> 00:27:43,291
I got suspended for bullying.
678
00:27:43,325 --> 00:27:44,492
Need a parent to come with me
to apologize.
679
00:27:44,526 --> 00:27:45,826
Apo--
[Sighs]
680
00:27:45,861 --> 00:27:47,695
Outrageous.
681
00:27:47,729 --> 00:27:48,963
Feed me numbing agents
682
00:27:48,997 --> 00:27:50,331
and drag me to the ring.
683
00:27:50,365 --> 00:27:52,133
You are in no shape
to go anywhere.
684
00:27:52,167 --> 00:27:54,302
He needs to
or else I'll get expelled.
685
00:27:54,336 --> 00:27:56,070
I'm so sorry, Carl,
but he's too weak.
686
00:27:56,104 --> 00:27:57,405
[Mouthing words]
687
00:27:57,439 --> 00:27:58,973
Could I borrow a long sweater?
688
00:27:59,007 --> 00:28:00,908
Of course, honey.
Here.
689
00:28:00,943 --> 00:28:02,977
Thanks.
690
00:28:03,011 --> 00:28:04,145
Do you need anything else?
691
00:28:04,179 --> 00:28:06,647
Um...
692
00:28:06,682 --> 00:28:08,149
Oh, okay.
693
00:28:08,183 --> 00:28:11,185
Hey, Carl,
if you grab those balloons
694
00:28:11,219 --> 00:28:12,720
and tie them
to the sign out front,
695
00:28:12,754 --> 00:28:15,222
I'll let you hold my gun.
696
00:28:15,257 --> 00:28:17,792
I got my period,
but all Fiona has are tampons
697
00:28:17,826 --> 00:28:19,994
and I'm saving my virginity
until I become a woman.
698
00:28:20,028 --> 00:28:21,529
Okay, first of all,
699
00:28:21,563 --> 00:28:23,998
you can't lose your virginity
to a tampon.
700
00:28:24,032 --> 00:28:26,634
It has to be a penis
with a man attached.
701
00:28:26,668 --> 00:28:28,736
And second,
you're already a woman.
702
00:28:28,770 --> 00:28:29,737
Officially.
703
00:28:29,771 --> 00:28:30,805
From the moment Aunt Flo
704
00:28:30,839 --> 00:28:32,840
came knocking at your vagina.
705
00:28:32,874 --> 00:28:34,575
Then why won't my boyfriend
have sex with me
706
00:28:34,610 --> 00:28:35,810
until I'm 16?
707
00:28:35,844 --> 00:28:37,044
Wow.
708
00:28:37,079 --> 00:28:38,379
They still make them like that?
709
00:28:38,413 --> 00:28:39,513
You got a good one.
710
00:28:39,548 --> 00:28:41,649
Tampons are varsity level,
711
00:28:41,683 --> 00:28:42,817
and you are still JV.
712
00:28:42,851 --> 00:28:45,686
Here, try these.
713
00:28:45,721 --> 00:28:47,221
Thanks.
714
00:28:47,255 --> 00:28:48,489
Could I stay here tonight?
715
00:28:48,523 --> 00:28:50,424
I love a sleepover.
716
00:28:50,459 --> 00:28:52,026
Absolutely.
717
00:28:52,060 --> 00:28:55,029
[Ukulele music]
718
00:28:55,063 --> 00:29:00,334
♪ ♪
719
00:29:00,369 --> 00:29:02,370
[Bracelet beeping]
720
00:29:06,274 --> 00:29:08,376
[Sighs]
721
00:29:08,410 --> 00:29:09,910
Hey, what's up?
722
00:29:09,945 --> 00:29:12,079
Uh, listen, I'm trying
to take the trash out.
723
00:29:12,114 --> 00:29:13,347
Could you come help?
724
00:29:13,382 --> 00:29:14,849
Sure.
You need anything else?
725
00:29:14,883 --> 00:29:16,617
How about a gallon of vodka?
726
00:29:16,652 --> 00:29:18,552
All right, I'll be there
in 20 minutes.
727
00:29:18,587 --> 00:29:22,857
Thanks.
728
00:29:22,891 --> 00:29:25,526
So we have Legos,
Mr. Potato head,
729
00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:27,528
dinosaurs, cars.
730
00:29:27,562 --> 00:29:29,430
Make sure he eats
at least half his PB&J
731
00:29:29,464 --> 00:29:30,731
before you give him
his Cheetos,
732
00:29:30,766 --> 00:29:32,433
and he hasn't pooped today,
733
00:29:32,467 --> 00:29:35,036
but he'll usually grab his butt
and yell "Doody bomb!"
734
00:29:35,070 --> 00:29:36,737
So you'll have fair warning.
735
00:29:36,772 --> 00:29:37,738
What else-- oh.
736
00:29:37,773 --> 00:29:38,973
Keep an eye on his crayons.
737
00:29:39,007 --> 00:29:40,808
He likes to jam them
up his nose.
738
00:29:40,842 --> 00:29:42,376
Okay, got it.
739
00:29:42,411 --> 00:29:44,612
This kid, total dreamboat.
740
00:29:44,646 --> 00:29:46,614
The men in my life
should be half as charming.
741
00:29:46,648 --> 00:29:49,550
Okay, then we got band-aids,
butt wipes--
742
00:29:49,584 --> 00:29:52,253
oh, stuffed monkey, of course.
743
00:29:52,287 --> 00:29:55,256
Two bouncy balls,
two puzzles, very hungry hippos,
744
00:29:55,290 --> 00:29:57,725
and then we've got a thermometer
and then children's tylenol,
745
00:29:57,759 --> 00:29:59,193
you know, just in case
he gets a fever.
746
00:29:59,227 --> 00:30:00,861
Okay, how long
are you gonna be gone for?
747
00:30:00,896 --> 00:30:02,730
Oh, three hours, but, you know,
748
00:30:02,764 --> 00:30:05,399
you can't be too careful.
749
00:30:05,434 --> 00:30:07,234
You're a really good person.
750
00:30:07,269 --> 00:30:09,036
No, if I were
a really good person,
751
00:30:09,071 --> 00:30:12,740
then I would quit school
and I'd stay home full time.
752
00:30:12,774 --> 00:30:17,378
Well, who does that help?
753
00:30:17,412 --> 00:30:18,813
Right. Um...
754
00:30:18,847 --> 00:30:20,715
Okay, so I'll be back
at 2:00.
755
00:30:20,749 --> 00:30:22,083
Is that still cool?
756
00:30:22,117 --> 00:30:23,651
Don't forget about
the ABC party
757
00:30:23,685 --> 00:30:24,952
tonight at the dorm.
758
00:30:24,986 --> 00:30:26,387
- What's that?
- Oh, you know.
759
00:30:26,421 --> 00:30:28,155
"Anything But Clothes."
760
00:30:28,190 --> 00:30:31,892
Duct tape, caution tape,
trash bags, bedsheets.
761
00:30:31,927 --> 00:30:34,228
Okay, well, I got a lit paper
due tomorrow,
762
00:30:34,262 --> 00:30:35,763
but that sounds fun.
763
00:30:35,797 --> 00:30:37,231
Here you go.
764
00:30:37,265 --> 00:30:39,834
And thank you so much
for doing all this.
765
00:30:39,868 --> 00:30:44,638
You know, I wish I could
think of a way to repay you.
766
00:30:44,673 --> 00:30:47,675
I'm sure you'll think
of something.
767
00:30:47,709 --> 00:30:50,678
[Light rock music]
768
00:30:50,712 --> 00:30:54,014
♪ ♪
769
00:30:54,049 --> 00:30:55,816
- Hey. Hi.
- Hey.
770
00:30:55,851 --> 00:30:58,085
So, uh, I got a lab
at half-past,
771
00:30:58,120 --> 00:30:59,353
so I only got,
like, 20 minutes.
772
00:30:59,387 --> 00:31:00,955
That's okay.
I'm quick.
773
00:31:00,989 --> 00:31:02,690
Right, and also
774
00:31:02,724 --> 00:31:04,458
I'm kind of going through
some shit,
775
00:31:04,493 --> 00:31:06,327
so I'm not really looking
for anything too, uh--
776
00:31:06,361 --> 00:31:10,498
Dude, I'm cold, I'm horny,
let's do this.
777
00:31:10,532 --> 00:31:14,769
Okay. Uh,
so your laundry room or mine?
778
00:31:14,803 --> 00:31:16,804
Up and down, come on!
779
00:31:16,838 --> 00:31:18,506
Let's burn the fat.
780
00:31:18,540 --> 00:31:19,874
Swing that booty!
781
00:31:19,908 --> 00:31:21,475
With figure eight fitness,
782
00:31:21,510 --> 00:31:24,178
I lost a total 21 pounds.
783
00:31:24,212 --> 00:31:26,881
I've lost 7 1/2 inches
around my waist
784
00:31:26,915 --> 00:31:29,016
and 53 pounds.
785
00:31:29,050 --> 00:31:30,017
I've lost 15--
786
00:31:30,051 --> 00:31:32,987
[Frenetic rock music]
787
00:31:33,021 --> 00:31:41,028
♪ ♪
788
00:31:46,501 --> 00:31:48,469
[Knocking at door]
789
00:31:51,373 --> 00:31:54,809
[Knocking continues]
790
00:32:00,315 --> 00:32:02,116
The fuck are you doing here?
791
00:32:02,150 --> 00:32:05,019
I brought you a little gift.
792
00:32:05,053 --> 00:32:07,521
Cronuts. I stood online
40 minutes for those.
793
00:32:07,556 --> 00:32:09,223
- Only let me have two.
- What do you want?
794
00:32:09,257 --> 00:32:12,526
A trendy hybrid pastry
for starts.
795
00:32:12,561 --> 00:32:14,395
Yo.
796
00:32:14,429 --> 00:32:16,630
Mike told me.
797
00:32:16,665 --> 00:32:20,701
The coke, the kid, jail.
798
00:32:20,735 --> 00:32:22,870
I can't imagine
what you're going through.
799
00:32:25,740 --> 00:32:27,908
I'm stuck in
this fucking house.
800
00:32:27,943 --> 00:32:31,645
I just organized Carl's t-shirts
in color order.
801
00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,147
I'm going mental.
802
00:32:33,181 --> 00:32:34,481
Can't even make it
to the sidewalk
803
00:32:34,516 --> 00:32:36,817
without bells going off.
804
00:32:36,852 --> 00:32:38,152
I, uh--
805
00:32:38,186 --> 00:32:39,753
So should I be expecting
806
00:32:39,788 --> 00:32:42,389
a knock on my door?
807
00:32:42,424 --> 00:32:43,390
What for?
808
00:32:43,425 --> 00:32:45,025
It was my coke.
809
00:32:46,361 --> 00:32:48,863
Heh.
810
00:32:48,897 --> 00:32:50,331
That's why you're here,
811
00:32:50,365 --> 00:32:51,866
to see if I ratted you out
to the police.
812
00:32:51,900 --> 00:32:53,434
- And to check on you--
- Fuck you.
813
00:32:53,468 --> 00:32:55,069
- Yes or no--
- No, asshole.
814
00:32:55,103 --> 00:32:56,337
I should have.
815
00:32:56,371 --> 00:32:57,671
They would have let me off
easier.
816
00:32:57,706 --> 00:32:58,873
Well, yeah, why didn't you?
817
00:32:58,907 --> 00:33:00,074
'Cause I hate myself
818
00:33:00,108 --> 00:33:01,375
for a number of reasons
right now
819
00:33:01,409 --> 00:33:02,509
and I'm not going to add
820
00:33:02,544 --> 00:33:03,577
being a snitch to the list.
821
00:33:03,612 --> 00:33:05,446
Okay.
822
00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:07,114
You ruined my life,
you know that?
823
00:33:07,148 --> 00:33:08,449
Dropping that little bomb
on Mike
824
00:33:08,483 --> 00:33:09,450
in front of your family.
825
00:33:09,484 --> 00:33:10,784
I did you a favor, okay?
826
00:33:10,819 --> 00:33:12,553
The cup job sucks
827
00:33:12,587 --> 00:33:15,923
and my brother's a boring
yuppie asshole, all right?
828
00:33:15,957 --> 00:33:17,191
Hey, girl.
829
00:33:17,225 --> 00:33:18,893
Sorry I took so long.
830
00:33:18,927 --> 00:33:21,295
Got held up in the bathroom
by the two girls in my gut
831
00:33:21,329 --> 00:33:24,298
sitting on my bladder
blocking my functions.
832
00:33:24,332 --> 00:33:25,933
Damn, you look like hell.
833
00:33:25,967 --> 00:33:27,601
Yeah, I'm not sleeping.
834
00:33:27,636 --> 00:33:29,603
Good thing I brought over
some snooze juice.
835
00:33:29,638 --> 00:33:32,206
Uh-huh.
836
00:33:32,240 --> 00:33:34,375
All right, all right.
837
00:33:34,409 --> 00:33:36,110
We're accepting
cash only offers
838
00:33:36,144 --> 00:33:37,378
to expedite the sale,
839
00:33:37,412 --> 00:33:39,480
which is why the price
is so low.
840
00:33:39,514 --> 00:33:41,148
Our lawyers will hold the money
in escrow.
841
00:33:41,182 --> 00:33:42,449
We need to unload it fast.
842
00:33:42,484 --> 00:33:44,051
Paying two mortgages
is killing us,
843
00:33:44,085 --> 00:33:47,087
plus dad needs to get
to a warmer climate ASAP.
844
00:33:47,122 --> 00:33:48,489
I mean, look at him.
845
00:33:48,523 --> 00:33:49,924
Easy, grandpa.
846
00:33:49,958 --> 00:33:51,292
We're looking to do
a renovation,
847
00:33:51,326 --> 00:33:52,426
a four-month turnaround.
848
00:33:52,460 --> 00:33:53,661
We'll purchase under ask.
849
00:33:53,695 --> 00:33:55,095
All cash.
850
00:33:55,130 --> 00:33:56,497
Duke it out with the hasids.
851
00:33:56,531 --> 00:33:58,432
Put an offer down
about 10 minutes ago.
852
00:33:58,466 --> 00:34:00,334
Skinny dudes.
You could probably take them.
853
00:34:00,368 --> 00:34:02,469
This couch is for sale
854
00:34:02,504 --> 00:34:07,074
and that table and the TV.
855
00:34:07,108 --> 00:34:08,409
How much for this chair?
856
00:34:08,443 --> 00:34:09,443
How much you want to pay?
857
00:34:09,477 --> 00:34:10,911
Well, how about--
858
00:34:10,946 --> 00:34:14,248
Cash only.
Please.
859
00:34:14,282 --> 00:34:15,916
Dad, it's working.
860
00:34:15,951 --> 00:34:17,151
They're falling for it.
861
00:34:17,185 --> 00:34:18,419
Isn't this fun?
862
00:34:18,453 --> 00:34:19,653
Yeah.
863
00:34:19,688 --> 00:34:20,988
- You okay?
- Yeah.
864
00:34:21,022 --> 00:34:22,489
I'm conserving my energy
865
00:34:22,524 --> 00:34:23,991
for Carl's thing tomorrow.
866
00:34:29,564 --> 00:34:31,765
Every gun's loaded, okay?
867
00:34:31,800 --> 00:34:37,104
So here we got your Bushmaster
XM-15 semiautomatic.
868
00:34:37,138 --> 00:34:40,708
Premium 16-inch chrome-lined
profile barrel.
869
00:34:40,742 --> 00:34:42,009
[Chuckles]
Sweet.
870
00:34:42,043 --> 00:34:43,644
What do you think about
home protection?
871
00:34:43,678 --> 00:34:45,179
I got three little ones
on the way.
872
00:34:45,213 --> 00:34:47,047
Safeguarding
the old homestead, huh?
873
00:34:47,082 --> 00:34:48,716
Hey, second amendment, brother.
874
00:34:48,750 --> 00:34:50,985
Got to protect my freedom
one bullet at a time.
875
00:34:51,019 --> 00:34:52,319
Okay, so...
876
00:34:52,354 --> 00:34:58,158
Milkor M32 MGL-140
grenade launcher.
877
00:34:58,193 --> 00:35:00,294
Protects a shitload
of freedoms.
878
00:35:00,328 --> 00:35:03,063
Six-round cylinder,
double-action,
879
00:35:03,098 --> 00:35:04,798
military grade weapon.
880
00:35:04,833 --> 00:35:06,200
Missing a few parts, but...
881
00:35:06,234 --> 00:35:08,235
[Chuckling]
it still shoots.
882
00:35:08,269 --> 00:35:09,670
It's heavy.
883
00:35:09,704 --> 00:35:10,671
What are we talking here?
884
00:35:10,705 --> 00:35:11,905
How much?
885
00:35:11,940 --> 00:35:13,474
Well, around five grand.
886
00:35:13,508 --> 00:35:14,708
$5,000?
887
00:35:14,743 --> 00:35:16,043
- Yeah.
- Aw, come on, man.
888
00:35:16,077 --> 00:35:17,578
[Cell phone notification dings]
889
00:35:17,612 --> 00:35:20,381
How much for the bat?
890
00:35:20,415 --> 00:35:22,383
Holy shit.
891
00:35:22,417 --> 00:35:23,650
I got to go.
892
00:35:23,685 --> 00:35:25,386
- Holy shit.
- That's it?
893
00:35:25,420 --> 00:35:27,021
Concierge.
894
00:35:27,055 --> 00:35:29,757
Medical coder.
Transcriptionist?
895
00:35:29,791 --> 00:35:31,358
I don't even know
what half this shit is?
896
00:35:31,393 --> 00:35:33,160
Other than supremely boring?
897
00:35:33,194 --> 00:35:34,395
[Sighs]
898
00:35:34,429 --> 00:35:36,697
No one needs me any more, V.
899
00:35:36,731 --> 00:35:38,098
Debbie's dating.
900
00:35:38,133 --> 00:35:40,701
Lip's in college.
901
00:35:40,735 --> 00:35:42,836
Carl's in trouble at school
and I can't help him.
902
00:35:42,871 --> 00:35:44,772
Who knows what's up with Ian.
903
00:35:44,806 --> 00:35:47,174
They're all growing up.
What'd you expect?
904
00:35:47,208 --> 00:35:50,844
Time for you to figure out
your own needs.
905
00:35:50,879 --> 00:35:52,679
Tech support provider.
906
00:35:52,714 --> 00:35:54,248
[Scoffs]
Underqualified.
907
00:35:54,282 --> 00:35:55,382
Translator.
908
00:35:55,417 --> 00:35:57,017
Underqualified.
909
00:35:57,052 --> 00:35:58,786
- There's porn.
- Overqualified.
910
00:35:58,820 --> 00:35:59,787
[Both chuckle]
911
00:35:59,821 --> 00:36:01,188
Hey, what are you doing?
912
00:36:01,222 --> 00:36:03,223
Finding ways to make money
from home.
913
00:36:03,258 --> 00:36:04,224
Huh.
914
00:36:04,259 --> 00:36:06,226
Hey, is something burning?
915
00:36:06,261 --> 00:36:07,227
- Smell that?
- Oh, shit.
916
00:36:07,262 --> 00:36:09,129
- Oh, shit!
- Shit!
917
00:36:09,164 --> 00:36:10,597
[Laughing]
918
00:36:10,632 --> 00:36:12,599
Oh, my God.
Oh, shit.
919
00:36:12,634 --> 00:36:13,600
[Smoke alarm beeping]
920
00:36:13,635 --> 00:36:14,802
Fire in the hole.
921
00:36:14,836 --> 00:36:15,803
Not my hole.
922
00:36:15,837 --> 00:36:18,372
[Both laughing]
923
00:36:18,406 --> 00:36:20,040
You just let it burn?
924
00:36:20,075 --> 00:36:21,141
We got distracted.
925
00:36:21,176 --> 00:36:24,078
Oh, God.
Ugh.
926
00:36:24,112 --> 00:36:25,779
You're shitfaced.
927
00:36:25,814 --> 00:36:28,482
Since when is is a felony
for a Gallagher to drink?
928
00:36:28,516 --> 00:36:30,584
Calm down. It's my fault.
I brought the vodka.
929
00:36:30,618 --> 00:36:32,052
Oh, and poured it
down her throat?
930
00:36:32,087 --> 00:36:34,054
You're the one who told me
to relax.
931
00:36:34,089 --> 00:36:36,290
Somebody shut that thing up!
932
00:36:36,324 --> 00:36:37,825
[Smoke alarm continues beeping]
933
00:36:37,859 --> 00:36:39,927
Fuck.
Burn the house down, okay?
934
00:36:39,961 --> 00:36:41,061
Burn the food too, you know,
935
00:36:41,096 --> 00:36:42,396
I can always steal some more
936
00:36:42,430 --> 00:36:43,931
from my shitty work-study job,
right?
937
00:36:43,965 --> 00:36:45,332
I'm going through something
here.
938
00:36:45,366 --> 00:36:46,800
Yeah, it looks like
you went through
939
00:36:46,835 --> 00:36:48,569
about five beverages
in an hour, Fiona.
940
00:36:48,603 --> 00:36:50,003
Have another one.
Why not?
941
00:36:50,038 --> 00:36:52,239
You're your own woman.
Right?
942
00:36:52,273 --> 00:36:54,341
No, bang the boss's brother.
943
00:36:54,375 --> 00:36:56,410
Leave coke out on the table
for the kids.
944
00:36:56,444 --> 00:36:57,411
Get arrested.
945
00:36:57,445 --> 00:36:58,979
Do whatever the fuck
946
00:36:59,013 --> 00:37:01,014
you need to do.
947
00:37:01,049 --> 00:37:02,082
I've got this.
948
00:37:02,117 --> 00:37:03,617
Hey, Carl, go upstairs,
949
00:37:03,651 --> 00:37:05,452
get your toothbrush
and something to sleep in.
950
00:37:05,487 --> 00:37:07,121
He has the suspension meeting
tomorrow.
951
00:37:07,155 --> 00:37:08,422
Oh, no worries.
No worries.
952
00:37:08,456 --> 00:37:09,690
I'll get him to Sheila's
in time.
953
00:37:09,724 --> 00:37:10,757
Stay up all night studying.
954
00:37:10,792 --> 00:37:12,159
I mean, what the fuck?
955
00:37:12,193 --> 00:37:13,494
It's just an applied physics
quiz.
956
00:37:13,528 --> 00:37:14,928
Where's Debbie?
957
00:37:14,963 --> 00:37:16,163
She's at Sheila's with Sammi.
958
00:37:16,197 --> 00:37:17,798
- Veronica!
- Yeah?
959
00:37:17,832 --> 00:37:19,199
You're not answering
your phone?
960
00:37:19,234 --> 00:37:20,701
I didn't hear it.
What's up?
961
00:37:20,735 --> 00:37:21,969
Carol.
She's in labor.
962
00:37:22,003 --> 00:37:23,770
What?
Oh, shit.
963
00:37:23,805 --> 00:37:24,838
Wish us luck.
964
00:37:24,873 --> 00:37:26,807
There's something burning.
965
00:37:26,841 --> 00:37:28,442
- Let's go. Come on.
- Go-- no.
966
00:37:28,476 --> 00:37:30,444
Hey, come on.
Lip, please.
967
00:37:30,478 --> 00:37:32,513
- You don't have to take them.
- You're right. I don't.
968
00:37:32,547 --> 00:37:35,282
Come on. What about dinner?
969
00:37:35,316 --> 00:37:36,517
Enjoy.
970
00:37:36,551 --> 00:37:40,654
[Smoke alarm continues beeping]
971
00:37:40,688 --> 00:37:42,589
[Sighs]
972
00:37:42,624 --> 00:37:45,759
Shut up!
973
00:37:45,793 --> 00:37:48,629
[Screams]
974
00:37:48,663 --> 00:37:51,598
[ZZ Ward's Move Like U Stole It]
975
00:37:51,633 --> 00:37:59,606
♪ ♪
976
00:38:17,659 --> 00:38:21,495
♪ I want you in my bed
in a minute flat ♪
977
00:38:21,529 --> 00:38:23,530
♪ let's hit the backseat
of your cherry Cadillac ♪
978
00:38:23,565 --> 00:38:25,265
Those fingers go anywhere
near that cock,
979
00:38:25,300 --> 00:38:26,967
I'm gonna break every knuckle
in your hand,
980
00:38:27,001 --> 00:38:28,268
all 15 of them.
981
00:38:28,303 --> 00:38:29,970
Settle down, rumble fish.
982
00:38:30,004 --> 00:38:33,340
Anyway, a hand only has
14 knuckles.
983
00:38:33,374 --> 00:38:34,808
You want to fucking die?
984
00:38:34,842 --> 00:38:36,376
♪ down to the fifth ♪
985
00:38:36,411 --> 00:38:40,647
♪ and hit that gas pedal
with a hell of a kick ♪
986
00:38:40,682 --> 00:38:42,182
We got invited
to an after-hours
987
00:38:42,217 --> 00:38:44,818
at the loft of
one of my regulars.
988
00:38:44,852 --> 00:38:46,720
It's fun.
989
00:38:46,754 --> 00:38:48,121
What's wrong with fun?
990
00:38:48,156 --> 00:38:50,023
Nothing unless it involves
some fat faggot
991
00:38:50,058 --> 00:38:51,291
shoving his hands down--
992
00:38:51,326 --> 00:38:53,894
No-- fuck.
993
00:38:53,928 --> 00:38:56,330
♪ so let's not think and just ♪
994
00:38:56,364 --> 00:38:59,933
♪ move like you stole it ♪
995
00:38:59,968 --> 00:39:03,670
♪ move like you stole it ♪
996
00:39:03,705 --> 00:39:07,975
♪ make your move on me ♪
997
00:39:08,009 --> 00:39:15,983
♪ ♪
998
00:39:18,686 --> 00:39:23,123
♪ make your move on me ♪
999
00:39:23,157 --> 00:39:24,992
I mean, I think about him
all the time.
1000
00:39:25,026 --> 00:39:26,526
Mm.
1001
00:39:26,561 --> 00:39:28,328
Whenever my brain pauses,
he just shows up,
1002
00:39:28,363 --> 00:39:30,364
even when I don't want him to.
1003
00:39:30,398 --> 00:39:32,633
What do you think about?
1004
00:39:32,667 --> 00:39:35,068
Like, his hair, his eyes,
1005
00:39:35,103 --> 00:39:36,336
sometimes just his name.
1006
00:39:36,371 --> 00:39:38,405
Is that normal?
1007
00:39:38,439 --> 00:39:39,806
Absolutely.
1008
00:39:39,841 --> 00:39:40,907
Because my two friends,
Holly and Ellie?
1009
00:39:40,942 --> 00:39:42,476
Uh-huh?
1010
00:39:42,510 --> 00:39:44,144
They're always like,
"Boys are stupid,"
1011
00:39:44,178 --> 00:39:45,412
and they act like
they hate them.
1012
00:39:45,446 --> 00:39:46,513
But I never feel that way.
1013
00:39:46,547 --> 00:39:47,881
How do you feel?
1014
00:39:47,915 --> 00:39:50,050
Um, this is weird.
1015
00:39:50,084 --> 00:39:51,752
Like I want to protect him.
1016
00:39:51,786 --> 00:39:53,086
Is that weird?
1017
00:39:53,121 --> 00:39:54,221
No, honey.
1018
00:39:54,255 --> 00:39:56,256
I also feel sick and dizzy.
1019
00:39:56,291 --> 00:39:59,893
Mm, that's how everyone gets
when they're falling in love.
1020
00:39:59,927 --> 00:40:01,928
But I thought it was
supposed to feel good.
1021
00:40:01,963 --> 00:40:05,332
It does sometimes.
1022
00:40:05,366 --> 00:40:07,701
The good parts are so good,
you're willing to suffer
1023
00:40:07,735 --> 00:40:11,038
an unbelievable amount
of pain just to get to them.
1024
00:40:11,072 --> 00:40:13,240
That's why I have been married
three times
1025
00:40:13,274 --> 00:40:15,042
and engaged 12.
1026
00:40:15,076 --> 00:40:17,110
But when do the good parts
start?
1027
00:40:17,145 --> 00:40:20,080
Well, right now it's hard.
1028
00:40:20,114 --> 00:40:22,616
He changed the rules
a little bit by dumping you.
1029
00:40:22,650 --> 00:40:24,017
Best thing to do?
1030
00:40:24,052 --> 00:40:25,585
Act like you don't give a shit.
1031
00:40:25,620 --> 00:40:27,287
How do I do that?
1032
00:40:27,322 --> 00:40:30,557
Well, hang out with him.
Make yourself pretty.
1033
00:40:30,591 --> 00:40:33,960
Give him the opportunity
to consider what he gave up.
1034
00:40:33,995 --> 00:40:36,730
That's how a woman
handles things.
1035
00:40:36,764 --> 00:40:38,799
And then he'll want me back?
1036
00:40:38,833 --> 00:40:40,467
Have to be patient.
1037
00:40:40,501 --> 00:40:42,369
This is a long con, baby.
1038
00:40:42,403 --> 00:40:43,603
You're in it to win it.
1039
00:40:43,638 --> 00:40:45,105
Stay the course.
1040
00:40:45,139 --> 00:40:46,239
Got it.
1041
00:40:46,274 --> 00:40:47,808
Thanks for talking to me.
1042
00:40:47,842 --> 00:40:49,810
I can't talk to Fiona
about any of this stuff.
1043
00:40:49,844 --> 00:40:51,712
She's a total spaz right now.
1044
00:40:51,746 --> 00:40:56,149
But also, I think
she's afraid of ending up alone.
1045
00:40:56,184 --> 00:40:58,585
That's her shit, not yours.
1046
00:40:58,619 --> 00:41:01,154
All done.
Need help wipin' and walkin'.
1047
00:41:01,189 --> 00:41:02,989
Coming, dad.
1048
00:41:03,024 --> 00:41:06,460
Be right back.
1049
00:41:06,494 --> 00:41:10,097
PS, I love having a sister.
1050
00:41:10,131 --> 00:41:14,835
[Chuckles]
Me too.
1051
00:41:14,869 --> 00:41:15,836
[Rock music]
1052
00:41:15,870 --> 00:41:19,473
[Students cheering]
1053
00:41:19,507 --> 00:41:23,844
♪ get lost in your eyes ♪
1054
00:41:23,878 --> 00:41:28,315
♪ we can leave the lights on,
girl ♪
1055
00:41:28,349 --> 00:41:33,120
♪ so I'll continue to get high ♪
1056
00:41:33,154 --> 00:41:37,524
♪ no time for second guessing ♪
1057
00:41:37,558 --> 00:41:39,159
Hey, kiddo, you doing okay?
1058
00:41:39,193 --> 00:41:41,128
Yeah,
is college always like this?
1059
00:41:41,162 --> 00:41:43,263
Ask Ron.
1060
00:41:43,297 --> 00:41:45,799
Well, I don't party that much,
and I try not to play
1061
00:41:45,833 --> 00:41:48,468
more than eight hours
of Minecraft a day.
1062
00:41:48,503 --> 00:41:50,704
And then you start doing
better in school?
1063
00:41:50,738 --> 00:41:52,205
All this could be yours.
1064
00:41:52,240 --> 00:41:54,007
College rules.
1065
00:41:54,041 --> 00:42:02,015
♪ ♪
1066
00:42:21,102 --> 00:42:24,204
[Chuckles]
Check out these digs.
1067
00:42:24,238 --> 00:42:26,706
Look at that view.
1068
00:42:26,741 --> 00:42:28,575
What does this joker do?
1069
00:42:28,609 --> 00:42:30,911
He's an engineer
and part-time photographer.
1070
00:42:30,945 --> 00:42:32,646
I think he took
some of these pictures actually.
1071
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:34,481
Oh, yeah?
1072
00:42:34,515 --> 00:42:35,916
Why'd he want you
to come here then, huh?
1073
00:42:35,950 --> 00:42:37,083
Oh, come on, not everybody
1074
00:42:37,118 --> 00:42:38,919
wants something from me, Mick.
1075
00:42:38,953 --> 00:42:40,320
- Ian.
- Hey!
1076
00:42:40,354 --> 00:42:42,489
- So happy you could make it.
- Ryan.
1077
00:42:42,523 --> 00:42:43,990
- Oh, good to be here.
- Mmm.
1078
00:42:44,025 --> 00:42:47,227
- Hey, this is Mickey.
- Delighted to meet you.
1079
00:42:47,261 --> 00:42:48,495
Uh, could I get
either of you a cocktail?
1080
00:42:48,529 --> 00:42:50,063
Yeah, you got beer?
1081
00:42:50,097 --> 00:42:51,231
I've got some Craft Brews,
a Stout,
1082
00:42:51,265 --> 00:42:52,933
IPA, Winter Wheat.
1083
00:42:52,967 --> 00:42:54,568
How about beer?
1084
00:42:54,602 --> 00:42:56,069
[Chuckles] Right.
1085
00:42:56,103 --> 00:42:57,604
Could I be any more of a fag?
1086
00:42:57,638 --> 00:42:59,039
One beer coming up.
Ian?
1087
00:42:59,073 --> 00:43:03,176
Let's see what you got.
1088
00:43:03,211 --> 00:43:05,212
You're new.
Hi.
1089
00:43:05,246 --> 00:43:07,280
Hey.
1090
00:43:07,315 --> 00:43:08,348
You here with Ian?
1091
00:43:08,382 --> 00:43:09,749
Yeah.
1092
00:43:09,784 --> 00:43:12,385
He's great.
1093
00:43:12,420 --> 00:43:14,921
So what do you do for living?
1094
00:43:14,956 --> 00:43:18,091
- I run business.
- What kind of business?
1095
00:43:18,125 --> 00:43:19,392
Hospitality.
1096
00:43:19,427 --> 00:43:22,095
Oh, nice.
What realm?
1097
00:43:22,129 --> 00:43:23,763
I'm a pimp.
1098
00:43:23,798 --> 00:43:27,400
[Laughs softly]
1099
00:43:27,435 --> 00:43:29,636
Wait, you're serious?
1100
00:43:29,670 --> 00:43:31,137
That's incredible.
1101
00:43:31,172 --> 00:43:32,606
My dissertation
is on transgender sex work
1102
00:43:32,640 --> 00:43:34,574
and symbolic interactionism
1103
00:43:34,609 --> 00:43:37,110
within the framework
of hustler-client relations.
1104
00:43:37,144 --> 00:43:38,812
You got a card?
1105
00:43:38,846 --> 00:43:41,815
[Soft acoustic guitar music]
1106
00:43:41,849 --> 00:43:45,886
♪ ♪
1107
00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:49,789
♪ and I know the world
keeps spinning ♪
1108
00:43:49,824 --> 00:43:54,728
Night, Debs.
1109
00:43:54,762 --> 00:43:58,798
♪ and I know I'm out of time ♪
1110
00:43:58,833 --> 00:44:00,967
Night, Frank.
1111
00:44:01,002 --> 00:44:03,637
Monica.
1112
00:44:03,671 --> 00:44:10,143
♪ I know the world
keeps spinning ♪
1113
00:44:10,177 --> 00:44:11,411
♪ but I'll take ♪
1114
00:44:11,445 --> 00:44:12,646
Good night, Fiona.
1115
00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:14,948
♪ my time ♪
1116
00:44:14,982 --> 00:44:20,787
♪ with you ♪
1117
00:44:20,821 --> 00:44:24,424
Good night, Lip.
Night, Carl and Ian.
1118
00:44:24,458 --> 00:44:30,430
♪ and I know the world
keeps spinning ♪
1119
00:44:30,464 --> 00:44:38,271
♪ I know I'm out of time ♪
1120
00:44:38,306 --> 00:44:39,673
[Sniffs]
1121
00:44:39,707 --> 00:44:43,677
♪ and I know the world
keeps spinning ♪
1122
00:44:43,711 --> 00:44:45,445
Good night, Liam.
[Sobbing]
1123
00:44:45,479 --> 00:44:50,483
♪ but I'll take my time ♪
1124
00:44:50,518 --> 00:44:55,355
♪ with you ♪
1125
00:44:55,389 --> 00:45:01,761
♪ ♪
1126
00:45:05,533 --> 00:45:08,501
[The F String's Nothing At All]
1127
00:45:08,536 --> 00:45:14,541
♪ ♪
1128
00:45:17,612 --> 00:45:19,879
Whoa.
1129
00:45:41,736 --> 00:45:44,437
It's time.
1130
00:45:44,472 --> 00:45:45,739
Oh, shit.
1131
00:45:45,773 --> 00:45:47,140
Time to be a daddy.
1132
00:45:50,778 --> 00:45:52,178
Wait, what, we missed it?
1133
00:45:52,213 --> 00:45:53,680
Why didn't anyone wake us?
1134
00:45:53,714 --> 00:45:55,582
I told her not to.
1135
00:45:55,616 --> 00:45:58,685
I needed to do this on my own.
1136
00:45:58,719 --> 00:45:59,919
[Coos at baby]
1137
00:45:59,954 --> 00:46:01,187
Oh, hey.
1138
00:46:06,160 --> 00:46:08,094
Hey.
1139
00:46:08,129 --> 00:46:09,696
Whoa.
1140
00:46:09,730 --> 00:46:11,431
He-- he's-- he's nothing.
1141
00:46:11,465 --> 00:46:14,467
He's just softness and goo.
1142
00:46:14,502 --> 00:46:15,735
Hey, buddy.
1143
00:46:15,770 --> 00:46:17,537
I'm your daddy.
1144
00:46:17,571 --> 00:46:19,906
And your brother-in-law.
How weird is that?
1145
00:46:19,940 --> 00:46:22,742
You know, he did that
little thing that babies do
1146
00:46:22,777 --> 00:46:25,712
where they can smell
their mommy's milk,
1147
00:46:25,746 --> 00:46:29,783
and he could hear my voice
when I was talking to him.
1148
00:46:29,817 --> 00:46:34,154
And then he laid up on my chest
1149
00:46:34,188 --> 00:46:37,724
and he found my nipple
and he took a little snack.
1150
00:46:37,758 --> 00:46:39,259
You okay, mama?
1151
00:46:39,293 --> 00:46:40,960
You know, it's just
a little emotional,
1152
00:46:40,995 --> 00:46:41,961
that's all.
1153
00:46:41,996 --> 00:46:44,597
Did I take him too soon?
1154
00:46:44,632 --> 00:46:45,832
Here you go.
1155
00:46:45,866 --> 00:46:48,735
Here's grandma.
1156
00:46:48,769 --> 00:46:50,236
Oh.
1157
00:46:50,271 --> 00:46:53,440
[Crying]
Oh, he's such--
1158
00:46:53,474 --> 00:46:55,909
he's such a little angel.
1159
00:46:55,943 --> 00:46:58,978
He's an angel
that you didn't want.
1160
00:46:59,013 --> 00:47:00,814
That was hypothetical.
1161
00:47:00,848 --> 00:47:02,482
But he came from me.
1162
00:47:02,516 --> 00:47:04,818
He's part of me.
1163
00:47:04,852 --> 00:47:06,186
- Jesus, mama.
- [Sniffles]
1164
00:47:06,220 --> 00:47:07,821
I'm sorry.
I just--
1165
00:47:07,855 --> 00:47:10,256
I just didn't know
I was gonna feel this way.
1166
00:47:10,291 --> 00:47:11,257
[Sniffs]
1167
00:47:11,292 --> 00:47:13,326
But he's just--
1168
00:47:13,360 --> 00:47:14,627
he's just so beautiful.
1169
00:47:14,662 --> 00:47:16,029
It's okay, mama.
1170
00:47:16,063 --> 00:47:18,298
You can visit him
any time you want to.
1171
00:47:18,332 --> 00:47:19,966
He's a little angel.
1172
00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:21,367
Kev.
1173
00:47:21,402 --> 00:47:22,869
Kevin.
1174
00:47:22,903 --> 00:47:24,838
He's my little angel.
1175
00:47:24,872 --> 00:47:26,106
Kev, she wants to keep him.
1176
00:47:26,140 --> 00:47:27,474
She can't.
1177
00:47:27,508 --> 00:47:29,142
She's not gonna let go
of that baby.
1178
00:47:29,176 --> 00:47:30,610
Well, she has to.
1179
00:47:30,644 --> 00:47:32,345
After everything
I've been though with him,
1180
00:47:32,379 --> 00:47:34,280
- he's mine, V.
- Kev, three babies?
1181
00:47:34,315 --> 00:47:35,515
I don't care.
1182
00:47:35,549 --> 00:47:39,519
That boy is my son.
1183
00:47:39,553 --> 00:47:41,554
Look at me.
1184
00:47:41,589 --> 00:47:42,555
Hey.
1185
00:47:42,590 --> 00:47:44,390
Look at me.
1186
00:47:44,425 --> 00:47:46,226
There can be two.
1187
00:47:46,260 --> 00:47:49,696
Our two beautiful baby girls.
1188
00:47:49,730 --> 00:47:50,964
She's a good mom.
1189
00:47:50,998 --> 00:47:52,398
She'll be great.
1190
00:47:52,433 --> 00:47:54,200
Look how well I turned out.
1191
00:47:54,235 --> 00:47:58,204
Yeah, well,
the jury's still out on that.
1192
00:47:58,239 --> 00:48:00,373
I don't want to lose him, V.
1193
00:48:00,407 --> 00:48:02,675
He'll still be right there
with mom.
1194
00:48:02,710 --> 00:48:05,245
He'll still be your son.
1195
00:48:05,279 --> 00:48:06,246
Your boy.
1196
00:48:06,280 --> 00:48:10,517
Her responsibility.
1197
00:48:10,551 --> 00:48:14,521
Let him go, baby.
1198
00:48:14,555 --> 00:48:17,557
[Crying]
1199
00:48:22,429 --> 00:48:25,398
[Phone vibrating]
1200
00:48:35,543 --> 00:48:37,043
Yeah?
1201
00:48:37,077 --> 00:48:39,512
I know you don't trust me.
1202
00:48:39,547 --> 00:48:42,348
I know you want to punish me,
1203
00:48:42,383 --> 00:48:43,683
and I get it.
1204
00:48:43,717 --> 00:48:46,252
I want to punish myself.
1205
00:48:46,287 --> 00:48:51,391
I have no way to prove myself
to you or anyone.
1206
00:48:51,425 --> 00:48:53,126
But, Christ, Lip, this, like,
1207
00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:59,532
relentless passive aggressive
bullshit,
1208
00:48:59,567 --> 00:49:03,770
it's killing me.
1209
00:49:03,804 --> 00:49:07,774
I need my family back, okay?
1210
00:49:10,344 --> 00:49:13,513
Please?
1211
00:49:17,952 --> 00:49:20,920
[Jazz music playing softly]
1212
00:49:20,955 --> 00:49:28,228
♪ ♪
1213
00:49:28,262 --> 00:49:31,097
Whoa! Whoa.
Easy, killer.
1214
00:49:31,131 --> 00:49:32,498
I'm taking breakfast orders.
1215
00:49:32,533 --> 00:49:34,434
Scrambled eggs, pancakes
or French toast?
1216
00:49:34,468 --> 00:49:36,736
[Exhales]
Eggs.
1217
00:49:36,770 --> 00:49:38,404
And what do you think
he'll want?
1218
00:49:38,439 --> 00:49:39,939
How the fuck
should I know, man?
1219
00:49:39,974 --> 00:49:41,341
I'm not his keeper.
1220
00:49:41,375 --> 00:49:43,409
Right.
Didn't mean to assume.
1221
00:49:43,444 --> 00:49:47,180
So... did you guys
just meet last night,
1222
00:49:47,214 --> 00:49:51,417
or are you together?
1223
00:49:51,452 --> 00:49:55,154
- Together.
- Cool.
1224
00:49:55,189 --> 00:49:57,690
You're a lucky dude.
1225
00:50:10,137 --> 00:50:12,305
There you go.
1226
00:50:12,339 --> 00:50:14,207
Fresh as a daisy.
1227
00:50:14,241 --> 00:50:16,509
You look terrific.
1228
00:50:16,543 --> 00:50:20,013
Now let's go knock 'em dead.
1229
00:50:20,047 --> 00:50:23,549
Good morning.
1230
00:50:23,584 --> 00:50:25,985
Frankly, Mr. Gallagher,
your son's behavior
1231
00:50:26,020 --> 00:50:27,854
has been among
the most egregious
1232
00:50:27,888 --> 00:50:29,455
I've seen at this school,
1233
00:50:29,490 --> 00:50:31,024
and I've been here a long time.
1234
00:50:31,058 --> 00:50:32,525
Don't look a day over 90.
1235
00:50:32,559 --> 00:50:33,559
[Snorts]
1236
00:50:33,594 --> 00:50:35,295
He terrorizes these students
1237
00:50:35,329 --> 00:50:38,464
to the point that they move
through my halls in fear.
1238
00:50:38,499 --> 00:50:41,000
School should not be
a palace of terror.
1239
00:50:41,035 --> 00:50:42,802
It should be
a temple of learning.
1240
00:50:42,836 --> 00:50:46,306
If children do not feel safe,
how can they learn?
1241
00:50:46,340 --> 00:50:47,373
They can't.
1242
00:50:47,408 --> 00:50:49,542
She's asking me, Chipwich.
1243
00:50:49,576 --> 00:50:51,177
The only way
to get through to Carl
1244
00:50:51,211 --> 00:50:53,513
is have him face
the truth of what he's done
1245
00:50:53,547 --> 00:50:57,517
and let him absorb it
in a meaningful way.
1246
00:50:57,551 --> 00:50:59,018
Do that, okay?
1247
00:50:59,053 --> 00:51:00,286
He can't just do it.
1248
00:51:00,321 --> 00:51:02,221
He needs to actively engage.
1249
00:51:02,256 --> 00:51:04,157
- Got any suggestions.
- Yeah.
1250
00:51:04,191 --> 00:51:07,327
He should apologize to my kid
and every other kid here.
1251
00:51:07,361 --> 00:51:09,295
Individually.
Like he means it.
1252
00:51:09,330 --> 00:51:11,965
Oh, spare us the Wiener act.
1253
00:51:11,999 --> 00:51:15,168
Bullying is a vital part
of every ecosystem.
1254
00:51:15,202 --> 00:51:17,503
It teaches kids resilience.
1255
00:51:17,538 --> 00:51:19,539
The world is a rough place.
1256
00:51:19,573 --> 00:51:22,408
Bullying is like
getting inoculated.
1257
00:51:22,443 --> 00:51:24,711
It's a vaccine.
1258
00:51:24,745 --> 00:51:26,145
And you little shit,
you got to learn
1259
00:51:26,180 --> 00:51:29,248
to stay away from people
like my son.
1260
00:51:29,283 --> 00:51:30,817
That's what you learn
when you get
1261
00:51:30,851 --> 00:51:33,086
punched in the face by a bully.
1262
00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:35,755
How do you think Steve Jobs
turned out so great?
1263
00:51:35,789 --> 00:51:36,756
Bullies.
1264
00:51:36,790 --> 00:51:40,226
And I guarantee Junior here
1265
00:51:40,260 --> 00:51:42,695
will be getting
the hottest chicks when he's 30
1266
00:51:42,730 --> 00:51:45,531
because he got bullied today.
1267
00:51:45,566 --> 00:51:47,233
You want your kid to peak now?
1268
00:51:47,267 --> 00:51:49,435
My kid will be picking up
roadside garbage
1269
00:51:49,470 --> 00:51:51,337
in an orange jumpsuit
in ten years.
1270
00:51:51,372 --> 00:51:55,508
Your kid will be in med school
curing cancer and getting laid.
1271
00:51:55,542 --> 00:51:58,211
You're welcome.
1272
00:51:58,245 --> 00:51:59,679
What if I want to cure cancer?
1273
00:51:59,713 --> 00:52:01,581
Be lucky you don't get
gonorrhea
1274
00:52:01,615 --> 00:52:02,682
from your cell mate.
1275
00:52:02,716 --> 00:52:04,417
Spoken with love, son.
1276
00:52:04,451 --> 00:52:06,419
Home.
1277
00:52:06,453 --> 00:52:08,955
I am so proud of you, dad.
1278
00:52:11,725 --> 00:52:14,627
[Country rock music]
1279
00:52:14,661 --> 00:52:16,896
Hey, hey,
congratulations, brother.
1280
00:52:23,070 --> 00:52:25,104
We lost him.
1281
00:52:25,139 --> 00:52:27,874
God, how?
1282
00:52:27,908 --> 00:52:29,776
Stillbirth?
1283
00:52:29,810 --> 00:52:32,945
Carol.
1284
00:52:32,980 --> 00:52:35,048
She kept him.
1285
00:52:35,082 --> 00:52:36,282
He's not dead?
1286
00:52:36,316 --> 00:52:37,884
No.
1287
00:52:37,918 --> 00:52:40,086
Just a little less ours.
1288
00:52:40,120 --> 00:52:42,055
Sorry to hear that, man.
1289
00:52:42,089 --> 00:52:43,756
But, hey, you still got
two on the way.
1290
00:52:43,791 --> 00:52:46,392
I was supposed to have four.
1291
00:52:46,427 --> 00:52:48,194
I keep losing babies.
1292
00:52:48,228 --> 00:52:50,296
I mean, what if there was
a Russian satellite
1293
00:52:50,330 --> 00:52:52,198
that took out all
the communication in the world
1294
00:52:52,232 --> 00:52:53,199
poof!
1295
00:52:53,233 --> 00:52:54,367
Two more babies gone.
1296
00:52:54,401 --> 00:52:55,601
Or if there was a mutant virus
1297
00:52:55,636 --> 00:52:57,036
that turned us all
into zombies--
1298
00:52:57,071 --> 00:52:58,938
- That's a movie.
- Several movies.
1299
00:52:58,972 --> 00:53:00,907
So?
It could happen.
1300
00:53:00,941 --> 00:53:02,942
See, babies change
your perspective.
1301
00:53:02,976 --> 00:53:04,744
There's danger
lurking everywhere.
1302
00:53:04,778 --> 00:53:07,046
Now, I'm gonna start
collecting survival gear.
1303
00:53:07,081 --> 00:53:10,917
Canned goods, medical stuff,
walkie-talkies, flashlights.
1304
00:53:10,951 --> 00:53:12,151
My motto?
1305
00:53:12,186 --> 00:53:13,753
Prepare and prevent,
1306
00:53:13,787 --> 00:53:16,456
don't repair and repent.
1307
00:53:16,490 --> 00:53:17,723
That's my motto.
1308
00:53:17,758 --> 00:53:20,927
You can't own a motto, Kermit.
1309
00:53:20,961 --> 00:53:22,495
[Cartoon gunshots]
1310
00:53:22,529 --> 00:53:24,063
Get him!
Get him.
1311
00:53:24,098 --> 00:53:25,998
Oh! He disappeared.
What the heck?
1312
00:53:26,033 --> 00:53:27,800
He'll regenerate behind you
in two seconds.
1313
00:53:27,835 --> 00:53:29,435
- Turn around.
- Oh! Oh, no!
1314
00:53:29,470 --> 00:53:30,803
Oh, he bit me in the back.
1315
00:53:30,838 --> 00:53:31,804
[Groans]
1316
00:53:31,839 --> 00:53:33,506
- Jerkface.
- So rude.
1317
00:53:33,540 --> 00:53:35,575
Aw, man.
1318
00:53:35,609 --> 00:53:37,343
Yeah.
[Laughs]
1319
00:53:37,377 --> 00:53:39,078
I'm glad we could stay friends.
1320
00:53:39,113 --> 00:53:41,914
Yeah.
Yeah, me too.
1321
00:53:41,949 --> 00:53:43,616
Do you want to get a pizza?
Or...
1322
00:53:43,650 --> 00:53:46,085
I wish I could,
but I have a date tonight.
1323
00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:47,687
Got to go home
and get cleaned up.
1324
00:53:47,721 --> 00:53:49,422
Okay. Yeah.
Yeah, sure. No problem.
1325
00:53:49,456 --> 00:53:50,957
But it was was fun hanging out.
1326
00:53:50,991 --> 00:53:52,425
- Yeah.
- High five.
1327
00:53:52,459 --> 00:53:54,260
[Chuckles]
1328
00:53:54,294 --> 00:53:55,828
- See you.
- I'll see you.
1329
00:53:55,863 --> 00:53:58,831
[The Dig's You And I]
1330
00:53:58,866 --> 00:54:06,873
♪ ♪
1331
00:54:14,882 --> 00:54:16,849
Hi.
1332
00:54:16,884 --> 00:54:18,151
Hi.
1333
00:54:23,056 --> 00:54:26,025
Thanks.
1334
00:54:26,059 --> 00:54:27,860
No problem.
1335
00:54:27,895 --> 00:54:31,797
♪ you and I
scrape the pavement ♪
1336
00:54:31,832 --> 00:54:34,767
♪ with a stone ♪
1337
00:54:34,801 --> 00:54:42,775
♪ ♪
1338
00:54:45,245 --> 00:54:47,480
And so what have we learned?
1339
00:54:47,514 --> 00:54:49,882
Bullying is bad for society.
1340
00:54:49,917 --> 00:54:52,218
It hurts people
and makes them feel bad.
1341
00:54:52,252 --> 00:54:54,654
It must be stopped.
1342
00:54:54,688 --> 00:54:57,023
Very good.
1343
00:54:57,057 --> 00:55:00,393
[Locksley's Black Ajax]
1344
00:55:00,427 --> 00:55:03,563
Forgot my lunch.
1345
00:55:03,597 --> 00:55:05,231
Give me money.
1346
00:55:05,265 --> 00:55:07,166
Give me money, chihuahua.
1347
00:55:07,201 --> 00:55:08,868
Come on, give me money.
1348
00:55:08,902 --> 00:55:12,351
♪ rollin' in, rollin' in ♪
1349
00:55:12,352 --> 00:55:15,765
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com