1 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:05,240 Don't know where you were, but here's what you missed. 2 00:00:05,480 --> 00:00:08,200 They're taking out the sewer main and shutting water off. 3 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:10,671 - What about Aunt Ginger? - Let me spell this out. 4 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,111 The city digs up some bones, the police show up. 5 00:00:13,360 --> 00:00:16,592 You buried a body and you stole from the federal government. 6 00:00:16,800 --> 00:00:18,598 You will never get out of prison. 7 00:00:18,800 --> 00:00:22,237 My-dad-is-gay-for-your-brother thing. It's on a film loop in my brain. 8 00:00:22,440 --> 00:00:24,432 I'll be back for dinner. Buck up, kiddo. 9 00:00:24,640 --> 00:00:27,314 No biggie, just my universe falling apart. 10 00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:30,399 We are literally digging up a body. 11 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:34,230 Walk away. Yeah, why don't you go cry to your gay dad about it? 12 00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:37,080 - Hey, what did the doc say? - I need to know the truth. 13 00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:39,317 - Can I have a baby? - What about a surrogate? 14 00:00:39,520 --> 00:00:41,637 - You two will take it from me? - Yes, Mama. 15 00:00:41,840 --> 00:00:44,196 It will be our child. It will be your grandchild. 16 00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:48,076 Know the guy you beat? Wants me to sneak into his mansion, take his crap. 17 00:00:48,280 --> 00:00:52,433 - What do you see in that geriatric Viagroid? - Isn't afraid to kiss me. 18 00:00:53,160 --> 00:00:55,072 - I can take care of you. - No, you can't. 19 00:00:55,320 --> 00:00:56,993 Get in the car. Get in the car. 20 00:00:57,240 --> 00:00:59,118 I love you, Debbie. 21 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:04,638 Operator, can you connect me with Child Welfare Services? 22 00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:07,799 I would like to report a negligent situation. 23 00:01:08,040 --> 00:01:09,110 Who the hell are you? 24 00:01:09,320 --> 00:01:11,915 I'm Britney from Child Protective Services. 25 00:02:36,160 --> 00:02:37,958 Whoa, wait. What the hell is going on? 26 00:02:38,160 --> 00:02:40,197 Department of Family Services is taking us. 27 00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:42,437 - What? Can they do that? - It won't last. 28 00:02:42,680 --> 00:02:44,990 - What was it last time, a week? - Nine days. 29 00:02:45,200 --> 00:02:48,238 Twenty bucks says we're back in five. 30 00:02:48,440 --> 00:02:53,560 - Can I get their placement addresses now? - Not until intake interviews are complete. 31 00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:56,150 Who reported us? 32 00:02:58,920 --> 00:03:01,037 Come on, who was it? 33 00:03:15,480 --> 00:03:17,278 Frank! 34 00:03:17,480 --> 00:03:18,834 Frank? 35 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:20,110 Frank. 36 00:03:20,960 --> 00:03:22,553 Frank. 37 00:03:23,080 --> 00:03:26,596 I'm off to my hypnotherapy appointment. I need you to watch Hiram. 38 00:03:26,800 --> 00:03:29,759 Kind of in the middle of something, Sheils. Where's Jody? 39 00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:31,553 He's working at the tattoo parlor. 40 00:03:31,760 --> 00:03:34,434 Marking idiots with ink so the rest of us can recognize them. 41 00:03:34,640 --> 00:03:37,200 Frank, you have tattoos. 42 00:03:38,000 --> 00:03:39,320 Point well taken. 43 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:44,276 And if you're doing laundry, can you put some of Hymie's onesies in? 44 00:03:44,480 --> 00:03:47,473 Might as well, you're both covered in pee pee. 45 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:53,349 Shh. 46 00:03:58,040 --> 00:04:00,396 Here you go, buddy. 47 00:04:02,640 --> 00:04:06,793 I just want you to know that my dumping you and leaving town... 48 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:11,356 ...is in no way a reflection of my feelings toward you, Hiram. 49 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:13,831 I just gotta lay low a little bit... 50 00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:17,556 ...in case they find Ginger's body in my backyard. 51 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,319 Shit, I got a shift in 10 minutes. 52 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:32,035 Yeah, go to your shift. I'll take care of this. 53 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:36,160 - Wasn't sure I'd see you again. - Yeah. 54 00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:38,033 I wasn't either. 55 00:04:41,920 --> 00:04:45,152 Gonna see if I can get one of the cock-gobblers to cover my shift... 56 00:04:45,360 --> 00:04:48,512 ...so I can get over to the DFS, start tracking down the kids. 57 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:53,596 You guys okay? 58 00:04:53,800 --> 00:04:56,634 Oh, yeah. Ain't our first time at the rodeo. 59 00:04:56,840 --> 00:05:00,834 Because Liam is still cute and little, he'll go to some loving home with people... 60 00:05:01,040 --> 00:05:05,080 ...who want a family, but waited so their egg batter rotted, so can't have their own. 61 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:07,596 Debbie and Carl will be placed together because-- 62 00:05:07,800 --> 00:05:10,872 Because the state always tries to keep siblings together. 63 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:14,272 And Lip and I can handle whatever foster nut-jobs we end up with. 64 00:05:14,480 --> 00:05:17,951 Remember that last guy with the, uh...? Was it the fucking bathroom peephole? 65 00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:20,550 - Yeah. - This time's gonna be a little different. 66 00:05:20,760 --> 00:05:23,036 I've placed Liam and Carl together. 67 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:25,994 But Debbie unfortunately has to be placed separately. 68 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:30,070 All by myself? 69 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:36,919 And Phillip and Ian, you're too old to be placed, so you're going to a group home. 70 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:51,995 - Like a whore's period, late again, bitch. - You're wasting your talents, Patty. 71 00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:54,152 You should be tweeting this crap. 72 00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,238 You're late. 73 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,398 I know, I'm sorry. Look. 74 00:06:00,600 --> 00:06:04,116 I have a family emergency and was wondering if I could skip my shift. 75 00:06:05,360 --> 00:06:06,476 Would you look at this? 76 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:08,515 It's filthy. 77 00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:12,151 My back is filthy because you haven't washed it. 78 00:06:12,360 --> 00:06:14,158 So, uh, why should I wash yours? 79 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:17,910 Look, I need a couple hours to get to the Department of Family Services. 80 00:06:18,120 --> 00:06:21,955 They yanked my brothers and sister from our house. Gotta find where they are. 81 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:26,154 Make sure they're safe and not with any psychos or anything. Please. 82 00:06:26,400 --> 00:06:30,314 Sorry, but, uh, you know, if you can't get anyone to cover your shift... 83 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:34,355 You know as well I do none of those bitches are gonna cover for me. 84 00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:39,516 I still have that video of you and have no problem sending it to your wife. 85 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:43,316 I have no problem going to DFS to tell them you steal and show up high. 86 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:47,560 - Your word against mine. - Actually, the girls will back me up. 87 00:06:47,800 --> 00:06:51,316 And I'm gonna want you to quit so I don't have to pay you unemployment. 88 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:54,118 Fuck you, Bobby. 89 00:06:54,320 --> 00:06:56,551 Tell you what, tickle the balls a little... 90 00:06:56,760 --> 00:06:59,594 ...maybe I'll write you a letter of recommendation. 91 00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:08,837 That really puts the "home" in group home. 92 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,880 It's only gonna be a couple days, okay? 93 00:07:22,120 --> 00:07:24,316 Every Gallagher can handle that, right? 94 00:07:24,520 --> 00:07:28,036 - I'll take care of Liam. - Yes, you will. 95 00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:34,759 Hey, Debs. 96 00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:39,319 I'll see you soon, all right? 97 00:07:39,560 --> 00:07:41,074 Hey. 98 00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:47,191 Good day, gentlemen. My name is D'Andre and this is Gunderson House... 99 00:07:47,440 --> 00:07:51,434 ...a level-14 boys group home, housing underage D&D's in the Chicago system. 100 00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:54,075 Is that "Dungeons and Dragons" or...? 101 00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:56,551 Delinquents and deviants. Follow me. 102 00:07:57,640 --> 00:08:01,156 This will be your primary residence until we figure out which one you are. 103 00:08:01,360 --> 00:08:03,670 Your wallets and cell phones will be in my care... 104 00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:07,596 ...until you've proven to me that you can follow the rules. 105 00:08:07,840 --> 00:08:10,878 - So this is like prison? - It's up to you. 106 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:15,677 You will be given an opportunity to earn back your money and cell phone privileges. 107 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:18,395 - Gee, thanks. - You would do well to shut your mouth... 108 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,597 ...and keep your eyes open in here. 109 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:29,477 Uh, the county database says you're available for placement... 110 00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,798 ...but, um, I'm concerned there are too many children in your care. 111 00:08:33,000 --> 00:08:34,798 I'm sure there's some kind of limit. 112 00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:39,631 These ain't cats, honey, they're kids. They need someone to take care of them. 113 00:08:39,840 --> 00:08:41,479 It's why the good Lord put me here. 114 00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:45,435 So I can take in all his babies don't nobody else want. 115 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:47,750 Come here, sweetheart. 116 00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:52,555 Come on, I'm not gonna bite you. Ha, ha. 117 00:08:53,560 --> 00:08:55,677 You're a blessing. 118 00:08:56,560 --> 00:09:00,349 Mama Kamala is truly blessed to have you. 119 00:09:01,720 --> 00:09:02,949 Yeah. 120 00:09:04,880 --> 00:09:07,839 It's only for a few days. I'll be okay. 121 00:09:08,960 --> 00:09:11,077 Um, this is my number. 122 00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:12,754 If you have any questions... 123 00:09:12,960 --> 00:09:17,193 ...or, you know, if you just want to talk about anything, call me anytime, okay? 124 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:20,395 Okey-dokey. 125 00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:26,552 Bye-bye, now. 126 00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:36,514 Rule number one: No sitting on the good furniture. 127 00:09:37,160 --> 00:09:38,913 This is the good furniture? 128 00:09:39,520 --> 00:09:42,638 Rule number two: No sass, you hear me? 129 00:09:44,040 --> 00:09:46,635 Let me look inside that bag. Give me that bag. 130 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:50,311 Make sure you ain't got nothing in there that get you in trouble. 131 00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:02,476 Why you standing there eyeballing me? Get busy minding them kids. 132 00:10:09,200 --> 00:10:11,237 Hi. I'm Debbie. 133 00:10:11,440 --> 00:10:12,999 LaRonda. 134 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:17,160 - You ain't getting your bags back. - I know. 135 00:10:17,360 --> 00:10:20,034 And what's your name? 136 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:23,155 We want to be completely honest with you, Carl. 137 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:26,671 We have been looking to adopt a biracial baby for quite some time... 138 00:10:26,880 --> 00:10:29,600 ...and when they called about Liam, we were over the moon. 139 00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:32,634 And then the state told us about you. 140 00:10:33,240 --> 00:10:35,357 And we want to try to keep you two together. 141 00:10:35,560 --> 00:10:38,678 - So let's give this foursome a try. - Which one are you again? 142 00:10:38,880 --> 00:10:41,554 I'm Cassius and this is Lanier. 143 00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:43,558 So you guys are gay? 144 00:10:43,760 --> 00:10:45,240 - Yup. - Yes. 145 00:10:45,440 --> 00:10:48,797 Does, like, shit ever get stuck on the tip of your dick? 146 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,396 Uh... 147 00:10:58,200 --> 00:10:59,953 Gallagher? 148 00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:06,434 I was hoping to see Marilyn. 149 00:11:06,680 --> 00:11:09,070 She's been our caseworker the last couple years. 150 00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:11,875 Well, uh, the turnover rate in our field is quite high. 151 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:15,630 It's really a wonder Marilyn lasted as long as she did. 152 00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:16,956 So how can I help you? 153 00:11:17,160 --> 00:11:19,311 Give me addresses where the kids were placed. 154 00:11:19,520 --> 00:11:23,958 I told you I can't give out any information about the case until intakes are complete. 155 00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:27,750 Come on, Marilyn always used to give me the info so I know they're okay... 156 00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:31,840 ...and can get them stuff like books or clothes or whatever. 157 00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:34,879 That is a clear violation of policy on Marilyn's part. 158 00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,640 Hey, I know you think you're helping... 159 00:11:37,880 --> 00:11:40,475 ...but as someone who's been in and out of the system... 160 00:11:40,720 --> 00:11:42,473 ...I can tell you it's a nightmare. 161 00:11:43,480 --> 00:11:46,996 These kids have a big sister and I just want to make sure they're okay. 162 00:11:47,200 --> 00:11:51,194 So give me something, Britney. I mean, break a goddamn rule. 163 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:58,560 I can tell you that I placed two together in one foster home, and the girl in another. 164 00:11:58,760 --> 00:12:01,275 And the two older boys are in a group home. 165 00:12:01,480 --> 00:12:02,800 The one on Hester? 166 00:12:03,480 --> 00:12:06,473 No, they're in a level-14 on Richmond. 167 00:12:09,720 --> 00:12:11,473 Thanks. 168 00:12:13,880 --> 00:12:18,397 If I can find one family willing to take in all the kids, could they be placed together? 169 00:12:19,880 --> 00:12:21,394 In theory, yes. 170 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:33,720 Hey. Stella been in yet? 171 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:36,674 - What's with the bag? - Uh, going fishing for a couple of days. 172 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:39,679 I heard Stella's pulling a long haul up to Northern Canada. 173 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:41,473 - Hoping to hitch a ride. - Fishing? 174 00:12:41,680 --> 00:12:45,674 - Gonna use your tiny dick as a worm? - Caught some big whales with this worm. 175 00:12:45,880 --> 00:12:47,997 Yourself included there, Moby. 176 00:12:48,240 --> 00:12:50,675 Hello, Stella. How are you, sunshine? 177 00:12:50,880 --> 00:12:53,076 - What the hell do you want? - Oh, you know. 178 00:12:53,280 --> 00:12:56,512 Same as you. Free pussy and a life on the road. 179 00:12:58,120 --> 00:13:00,237 - Could I hitch a ride? - Where you headed? 180 00:13:00,440 --> 00:13:02,033 Anywhere but here. 181 00:13:02,880 --> 00:13:07,033 - Kill somebody? - No, no. But I did bury her. 182 00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:09,720 Could always use some company. 183 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,591 I'll meet you here before I pick up my load. 184 00:13:12,800 --> 00:13:15,599 Couple boilermakers to take the edge off a long haul, eh? 185 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:17,154 I don't drink before I drive. 186 00:13:17,360 --> 00:13:20,797 I end up ramming Smart Cars in the ass for shits and giggles. 187 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:30,434 - V? - Upstairs. 188 00:13:36,680 --> 00:13:39,991 Making a video for one of those do-it-yourself websites online. 189 00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:42,351 Pays $150. This one's on a high colonic. 190 00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:44,438 Next week, I bleach my exit ramp. 191 00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:46,757 - DFS took the kids this morning. - Oh, shit. 192 00:13:46,960 --> 00:13:49,714 Think you could talk to your caseworker about taking them? 193 00:13:49,920 --> 00:13:53,038 - Five Gallaghers in my house? - Just for a couple days. A week. 194 00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:55,880 Lip and Ian got placed in a level-14 group home. 195 00:13:56,080 --> 00:13:58,720 - Level-14? - For kids that light their parents on fire... 196 00:13:58,920 --> 00:14:01,389 ...or stab them in the face while they're napping. 197 00:14:01,600 --> 00:14:03,751 You're over 21. Can't they release them to you? 198 00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:05,633 I'd have to file for guardianship. 199 00:14:05,840 --> 00:14:11,598 Five Gallaghers. I'm gonna be the lone black dot on a map of Ireland. 200 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,840 You've been in a group home before. 201 00:14:24,040 --> 00:14:25,315 It's always like this? 202 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:28,718 No, last place I was in was an actual home. 203 00:14:28,920 --> 00:14:31,833 This is more like a fucking labor camp. 204 00:14:35,360 --> 00:14:37,272 Give me your cash. 205 00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:38,954 - What? - Give me your cash. 206 00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:41,038 Now. Come on. 207 00:14:44,840 --> 00:14:47,992 Hey, Salvador, check it out, it's that chick from the movie Brave. 208 00:14:49,040 --> 00:14:51,157 - He your boyfriend? - No. Brother. 209 00:14:52,320 --> 00:14:53,720 I'm Lip. This is Ian. 210 00:14:54,200 --> 00:14:58,513 Uh, we don't want any trouble, all right? 211 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:02,475 - Just passing through. - Long as you show respect, gonna be fine. 212 00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:17,432 You're like a fucking cockroach, able to live anywhere and feed off anything. 213 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,592 Lemonade, man. 214 00:16:18,920 --> 00:16:20,912 - Jimmy? - Darker. 215 00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:23,152 Hey. Talk to your caseworker? 216 00:16:23,360 --> 00:16:24,396 Unfortunately, yeah. 217 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,717 Two reasons why we can't take in your brood. 218 00:16:26,960 --> 00:16:30,715 The fact that you had a foster child in your home... 219 00:16:30,960 --> 00:16:33,270 ...that ran away under your "supervision." 220 00:16:33,480 --> 00:16:38,919 Technically, the investigation is still pending as to the quality of your care. 221 00:16:39,120 --> 00:16:41,919 The quality of my care? Her running away is my fault? 222 00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:46,319 Oh, you know what? Do not get all up in my grill, sister-girl, okay? 223 00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:48,594 Well, it was worth a shot. 224 00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:49,916 Now what? 225 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:52,114 Gotta kick it into high gear. 226 00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:56,149 Figure out where the kids are staying, get the house ready for home inspection. 227 00:16:56,360 --> 00:16:58,955 They're gonna require a fit parent to get the kids back. 228 00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,511 I'm hoping to find Monica so I don't have to deal with Frank. 229 00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:05,640 Why does it always come down to Frank? 230 00:17:09,280 --> 00:17:11,112 Carl, it's dinner time. 231 00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:12,754 Carl! 232 00:17:12,960 --> 00:17:14,952 Where is that boy? 233 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,079 Yeah. Oh, that fucker's going up your ass. 234 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:22,079 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 235 00:17:22,280 --> 00:17:25,398 Why don't you get those pants off so I can get in your fucking hole? 236 00:17:25,640 --> 00:17:28,872 - Why do they all have mustaches? - Out. Now. 237 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:32,474 That was an invasion of our privacy and we won't have it. 238 00:17:32,680 --> 00:17:36,071 You are not to touch things that don't belong to you. 239 00:17:36,320 --> 00:17:37,356 Now sit down. 240 00:17:37,560 --> 00:17:40,029 - Am I allowed to touch the chair? - Don't be smart. 241 00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:45,395 What the hell is this? 242 00:17:45,600 --> 00:17:47,592 Kale, brown rice and tofu. 243 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:52,113 Your body is a temple, Carl, and you only want to put things in it that are natural. 244 00:17:52,320 --> 00:17:54,357 Like fists? 245 00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:56,916 I saw it in that movie. 246 00:18:39,120 --> 00:18:41,237 Holes in your backyard have been filled. 247 00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:43,830 Hey, Grandma, it's Fiona. 248 00:18:44,040 --> 00:18:46,032 Gallagher. 249 00:18:46,240 --> 00:18:48,675 Yeah. Yeah, it's been a while. 250 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:52,794 Yeah, I was just wondering if you, by any chance, know where my mom might be? 251 00:18:53,800 --> 00:18:55,712 Your daughter. 252 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:57,274 Monica. 253 00:18:59,400 --> 00:19:02,711 Yeah. Yeah. I figured, but I just thought I'd try. 254 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:05,389 Okay, thanks. 255 00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:13,433 - Now what? - With no Monica, kind of have no choice. 256 00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:14,676 I gotta find Frank. 257 00:19:14,920 --> 00:19:17,389 Get him sober and ready to appear in court. 258 00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,915 He's like my sad-ass Obi-Wan Kenobi. 259 00:19:24,320 --> 00:19:26,232 I can help you with that. 260 00:19:28,440 --> 00:19:33,071 That's a pretty nice offer considering how much of a dick I was to you about your dad. 261 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:34,430 You're always a dick. 262 00:19:34,640 --> 00:19:37,951 Seriously, I don't mean to be an asshole, it's just... 263 00:19:40,160 --> 00:19:41,514 ...genetic. 264 00:19:41,720 --> 00:19:43,439 You're not wrong. 265 00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:50,872 I need to suck it up about my dad being gay. 266 00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:52,554 And a liar. 267 00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,150 Yeah, I need to get over it. And I am. 268 00:19:55,360 --> 00:19:56,510 I'm good. 269 00:19:59,880 --> 00:20:01,155 Silver lining? 270 00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:02,874 Huh? 271 00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:05,800 Finally have the house to ourselves. 272 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:14,354 Sorry, I'm just not feeling it. 273 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:17,195 You mind if we just lay here? 274 00:20:18,320 --> 00:20:21,791 Yeah. Yeah. Sounds nice. 275 00:20:33,480 --> 00:20:36,314 - What is this stuff? - It's pus from your mother's monkey. 276 00:20:36,520 --> 00:20:39,638 - Thought you liked the taste of that. - What is your problem, dude? 277 00:20:39,880 --> 00:20:42,395 Nick, Salvador, find another table. 278 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:44,034 Come on, chop-chop. 279 00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:48,315 Proof of employment came through, so you go to work. 280 00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:51,797 I need your employer to sign this. Times in and out, you understand? 281 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:55,550 I'm actually pretty excited to get out there, start looking for work. 282 00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:59,674 Nice try, you have court-mandated community service hours you owe. 283 00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:02,190 Only a few. Then I can start looking for work... 284 00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:06,070 ...so I can become a contributing member of our great capitalistic society. 285 00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:09,199 You think you're better than everyone here, don't you? 286 00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:12,799 Oh, that's... 287 00:21:13,040 --> 00:21:16,829 That's rhetorical, right? I mean, you don't want me to answer that, do you? 288 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:21,154 See, I could smack you across the face, but I think it's better I get out your way... 289 00:21:21,360 --> 00:21:23,317 ...let life bend you over instead. 290 00:21:28,360 --> 00:21:31,114 Dude thinks he's in an episode of Scared Straight! 291 00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:39,111 - Ethel really fucked up our kid credit. - Yep. 292 00:21:39,320 --> 00:21:41,198 Now we can't even get a foster kid. 293 00:21:41,440 --> 00:21:44,160 - Anybody can get a foster kid. - I think it's a sign. 294 00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:47,120 Jerry Sandusky could probably get a foster kid. 295 00:21:47,360 --> 00:21:49,591 Need to step it up in the surrogate department. 296 00:21:49,800 --> 00:21:52,440 We did the baster thing with your mom. See if it works. 297 00:21:52,640 --> 00:21:54,916 Mama pukes the morning after she gets knocked up. 298 00:21:55,160 --> 00:21:58,437 It was like watching someone take ipecac. Could set your watch by it. 299 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:01,633 - My super-spermazoa too much for her? - Spermatozoa. 300 00:22:01,880 --> 00:22:05,556 I don't think it worked. We need to try something else. 301 00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:08,194 Frank? 302 00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,234 Goddamn it, did you sleep here last night? 303 00:22:11,440 --> 00:22:13,079 Guilty. 304 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,359 Stella here yet? 305 00:22:16,600 --> 00:22:19,911 Oh, come on. I'm not helping you up. Get up. 306 00:22:23,720 --> 00:22:27,509 As of right now, you are officially on the wagon. 307 00:22:27,720 --> 00:22:30,189 DFS made a surprise appearance, the kids got pulled. 308 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:33,711 - Time for your father-of-the-year act. - Oh, my God. They all right? 309 00:22:33,920 --> 00:22:37,470 Tell you what, meet back at the house and we'll get this all settled. 310 00:22:37,680 --> 00:22:40,320 Looks heavy. Why don't I carry this back to the house? 311 00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:44,230 But I need it for some errands I'm going to run in a little-- 312 00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:46,796 Back at the house now or you'll lose your kids... 313 00:22:47,000 --> 00:22:49,117 ...and the welfare checks that come with them. 314 00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:52,950 I go to the house, the city finds Ginger's body, I'm toast. 315 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,470 I found Ginger and I tossed her bones. 316 00:22:55,720 --> 00:22:56,756 You're safe. 317 00:22:56,960 --> 00:22:58,758 Oh. 318 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,237 - That's great. - Not for you. 319 00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:03,597 You don't do exactly as I say... 320 00:23:03,800 --> 00:23:07,077 ...I'll rat you out about Ginger's checks and your fake disability. 321 00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:08,549 You don't have the balls. 322 00:23:09,120 --> 00:23:14,354 Jesus Christ, I need you to do this. Can you just do this? 323 00:23:14,560 --> 00:23:17,951 I'm sorry, did you just say you need me? 324 00:23:18,200 --> 00:23:21,432 Yes. I need you to get your shit together and get the kids back. 325 00:23:21,640 --> 00:23:24,519 Well, seeing as how you need something from me... 326 00:23:24,720 --> 00:23:27,474 ...maybe I need something from you. 327 00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,878 For starters, I'd like to be shown the respect which I deserve. 328 00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:32,753 I believe I'm already doing that. 329 00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:37,398 And this one is non-negotiable, I want free roam of my own house. 330 00:23:38,280 --> 00:23:39,953 Fine. 331 00:23:40,840 --> 00:23:43,230 We're gonna go visit Lip and Ian in the group home. 332 00:23:43,480 --> 00:23:47,554 God knows what they've been dealing with in that shithole. Then we find your lawyer. 333 00:23:48,600 --> 00:23:50,671 He has a lawyer? 334 00:23:55,840 --> 00:24:00,198 Don't worry, soon as I steal enough stuff from these guys, we're out of here. 335 00:24:06,760 --> 00:24:09,673 Oh, yeah. I spent some time here... 336 00:24:09,920 --> 00:24:13,391 ...that summer Mom was sent away for knifing a poodle. 337 00:24:13,600 --> 00:24:17,674 Hey, I missed you guys. 338 00:24:17,880 --> 00:24:20,634 - How you holding up? - We're fine. Place is a joke. 339 00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,912 - Still serving that rotten porridge? - He already on the wagon? 340 00:24:24,120 --> 00:24:27,079 - Why do you say that? - As of right now. You out on furlough? 341 00:24:27,280 --> 00:24:29,556 I've gotta work. He's gotta finish parole hours. 342 00:24:29,760 --> 00:24:33,117 - Guys want a lift? - Gotta get our passes signed by the driver. 343 00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:35,875 - You find Debs and the boys? - Not yet, but I will. 344 00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:38,800 - You need anything? Cash? Clothes? - No, no, no. Look. 345 00:24:39,000 --> 00:24:41,071 Don't worry about us. We're fine. 346 00:24:42,120 --> 00:24:43,156 Worry about him. 347 00:24:45,640 --> 00:24:47,233 Where's my hug? 348 00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:55,159 I'll wash, you dry. 349 00:25:03,640 --> 00:25:06,553 Grab a cup of Kool-Aid from the table. 350 00:25:08,680 --> 00:25:12,560 Hey, Strawberry Shortcake, get on in here and cut my toenails! 351 00:25:14,280 --> 00:25:16,033 Okay, take over. 352 00:25:17,560 --> 00:25:18,630 Come on, come on. 353 00:25:21,320 --> 00:25:25,314 I mean, there's just no privacy. If I wanna jack off, I gotta do it in the bathroom. 354 00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:28,752 Can't even begin to imagine what a pussy you'd be in juvie. 355 00:25:31,400 --> 00:25:32,800 You fuck anyone in there yet? 356 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:34,150 God, no. 357 00:25:34,360 --> 00:25:35,555 Wise choice. 358 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,315 Even if you're propositioned, it's probably a setup. 359 00:25:38,520 --> 00:25:42,833 Guys find out if you're gay and pound the shit out of you. Not in a good way. 360 00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:45,077 Great. 361 00:25:45,280 --> 00:25:49,194 Hey, my dad took my brothers on a run out of town for a couple of days. 362 00:25:49,440 --> 00:25:52,592 You wanna ditch that dump and crash at my place, you can. 363 00:25:54,920 --> 00:25:59,790 - Was I just invited to a sleepover? - Fuck you, is what you were invited to. 364 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:07,954 Fiona here? She's not home. 365 00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:10,629 Are you okay? Did your foster parents hurt you? 366 00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:12,030 No. We ran away. 367 00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:14,880 You can't stay. The police will come looking for you. 368 00:26:15,080 --> 00:26:19,040 We're with these gay guys and they keep talking about how they wanna swipe Liam. 369 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:22,631 You gotta go back. I know what it's like to have a foster kid run away. 370 00:26:22,840 --> 00:26:25,036 - Come on. - But what if they really keep Liam? 371 00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:28,995 Only reason they would keep him is if they want him. Be sure they don't. 372 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:30,395 Be creative. 373 00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:34,470 - Can you at least hold some of my stuff? - What stuff? 374 00:26:44,360 --> 00:26:47,273 Jesus, Lou. 375 00:26:47,640 --> 00:26:50,030 - When did that happen? - It's not mine. 376 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:51,993 - Get to the point, Frank. - Who's this? 377 00:26:52,200 --> 00:26:54,635 My daughter. And her girlfriend. 378 00:26:54,880 --> 00:26:57,156 - Who's in trouble? - DFS snatched my kids. 379 00:26:57,360 --> 00:26:59,477 - I need you to get them back. - Catch? 380 00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:03,680 I have no money and no promise of any coming my way anytime soon. 381 00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:06,792 Okay. 382 00:27:07,000 --> 00:27:08,275 First order of business: 383 00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:12,673 You need to get your ass to DFS and file a petition to reinstate custody. 384 00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:14,917 You're going to need to dig up that wife. 385 00:27:15,120 --> 00:27:18,557 It's always better to have signatures from two instead of one. 386 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:22,197 - What if we can't find her? - Find someone that looks like her. 387 00:27:22,400 --> 00:27:24,756 You're going to need her to take parenting classes. 388 00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:28,715 I'm going to go ahead and get the case file and I will see you at the hearing. 389 00:27:28,920 --> 00:27:32,709 In the meantime, no drugs, no booze, no poppy seed bagels. 390 00:27:32,960 --> 00:27:36,192 I need your piss clean and your eyes white. 391 00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,312 Thanks for the phone call. 392 00:27:45,520 --> 00:27:47,796 You know how hard it is to find a public phone? 393 00:27:48,000 --> 00:27:50,993 Ian managed. Then I had to track your ass through the city. 394 00:27:51,200 --> 00:27:52,759 Sorry, I've been busy. 395 00:27:52,960 --> 00:27:55,873 Molly's mom showed up at my house. 396 00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:59,471 - She's still alive? - Turns out Molly's a runner. 397 00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:03,071 - What, you just let her take her? - Oh, I was supposed to stop her? 398 00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,630 If she ran, it was probably for a good reason, no? 399 00:28:05,840 --> 00:28:08,639 Or not. I used to run away all the time when I was little. 400 00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:11,150 My point exactly. 401 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:15,430 My dad's out of town for a few days and I told Mickey he could have the place. 402 00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:16,676 Can I stay with you? 403 00:28:16,920 --> 00:28:20,197 I got to play it straight at this group home for a bit. 404 00:28:24,080 --> 00:28:26,834 Maybe I can sneak you in tonight, though? 405 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:28,838 Promise I won't get gang raped? 406 00:28:29,040 --> 00:28:30,633 Nope. 407 00:28:31,360 --> 00:28:34,080 Whatever, I'm in. 408 00:28:37,720 --> 00:28:39,598 Why are you eating candy before dinner? 409 00:28:39,800 --> 00:28:41,951 Because it says here that dark chocolate... 410 00:28:42,160 --> 00:28:44,755 ...has an amino acid that doubles your sperm count. 411 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:49,477 I didn't read that one, but Mama says asparagus and garlic does the trick, so ta-da. 412 00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:51,876 If I eat all that, my piss is going to stink. 413 00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,032 And Mama's bringing over oysters. 414 00:28:54,240 --> 00:28:59,759 But we got to think of a better delivery system than the turkey baster. 415 00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:03,353 Squirt gun. 416 00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:07,349 - Kind of messy. - What about a straw? Silly straw. 417 00:29:09,160 --> 00:29:12,278 - Jacobs. - Here. 418 00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,513 And Weston. 419 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:20,032 - Weston! - Here. 420 00:29:20,520 --> 00:29:26,551 All right, good night you shits of Chicago, pricks of Illinois. Ha, ha. 421 00:29:45,520 --> 00:29:47,557 Have fun. 422 00:29:58,480 --> 00:30:00,039 How'd you get the private room? 423 00:30:00,240 --> 00:30:01,276 I made some friends. 424 00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:04,479 This what it's gonna be like when you sneak me into your dorm? 425 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:08,594 Little different. Guessing my dorm mates will be literate. 426 00:30:11,640 --> 00:30:15,236 You are out of your mind. Have you seen that fucking ponytail? 427 00:30:15,440 --> 00:30:17,671 It's a powerful ponytail, man. That's bullshit. 428 00:30:17,880 --> 00:30:19,917 Seagal could totally kick Van Damme's ass. 429 00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:24,512 Unless, unless it's Double Impact Van Damme. 430 00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:27,030 Because that's some Van Double Damme. 431 00:30:32,280 --> 00:30:33,634 Fuck Van Damme. 432 00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:44,593 Are you out of your fucking mind? 433 00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:47,713 Kev is just going to lie with you for procreation, not sex. 434 00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:50,879 - What is the difference? - It's clinical so no one enjoys it. 435 00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:53,231 Millions of sperm died in that turkey baster. 436 00:30:53,440 --> 00:30:56,797 This will deliver the biggest batch. The bigger the batch, the better the chance. 437 00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:01,990 Uh-uh. No, honey, this is an express bus to The Maury Povich Show. 438 00:31:03,400 --> 00:31:07,917 I want nothing more than to be able to give you the baby that I know you want... 439 00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:11,875 ...and the grandbaby that you deserve. 440 00:31:12,240 --> 00:31:16,632 But I can't. And it kills me. 441 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:23,395 Please, just give it a go while you're still ovulating. 442 00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:32,874 What kind of hard liquor you got and how much? 443 00:31:35,320 --> 00:31:36,913 Damn, it's hot up here. 444 00:31:37,160 --> 00:31:40,153 That's because heat rises. 445 00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,558 Then how come space is so cold? 446 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:48,873 I got it. 447 00:31:49,920 --> 00:31:51,115 Who's at the door? 448 00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,279 - Hey, uh... - Who's at the door? 449 00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:56,790 - No, Frank, no. - Wait. 450 00:31:57,000 --> 00:32:00,550 - You-- First of all, get out. Get out! - Just hear me out. 451 00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:04,754 - You are not allowed in here. Get out. - DFS pinched my kids. 452 00:32:04,960 --> 00:32:07,873 I need you to pretend to be Monica to help me get them back. 453 00:32:08,080 --> 00:32:10,959 What? No, no. Why should I do anything for you? 454 00:32:11,160 --> 00:32:15,074 - You left Hiram all alone. - I am begging you. 455 00:32:15,320 --> 00:32:19,712 As someone who knows what it feels like to lose a kid. Karen ran away. 456 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,709 Can you imagine what it must feel like to have them taken from you? 457 00:32:23,960 --> 00:32:29,035 This isn't for Frank, okay? It's for Debbie and Carl and Liam. 458 00:32:31,080 --> 00:32:34,437 Maybe you should do it, Shelly Bear. For the kids. 459 00:32:48,080 --> 00:32:50,311 Give it up, Kev. 460 00:32:50,520 --> 00:32:56,596 You can't make it dark enough to deny what's about to happen in here. 461 00:32:56,800 --> 00:32:59,235 I wish I was drunk as you. 462 00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:02,717 No, I can't risk the whiskey dick. Okay, let's get this going. 463 00:33:02,920 --> 00:33:06,470 - Ha, ha. - Shh. Knock it off, Mama. 464 00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:11,233 Wait, wait, wait. What's with the KKK costume? 465 00:33:11,440 --> 00:33:15,434 I saw them use something like this at that super Jew-y wedding I went to last year. 466 00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:17,831 It keeps the skin from touching, a barrier. 467 00:33:18,040 --> 00:33:20,350 I feel like a ghost prostitute. 468 00:33:20,600 --> 00:33:23,877 You know, like that Jennifer Love Hewitt show, you seen that? 469 00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:29,030 Where she's, like, a call girl for ghosts or some shit. 470 00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:31,755 - That's two different shows. - You two ready? 471 00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:36,000 Get me get the hell out of here first. I can't watch this part. 472 00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:41,640 You okay out there? 473 00:33:42,480 --> 00:33:44,392 Yeah, I'm fine. How are you? 474 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:46,717 - You need any help? - No, I'm fine. I'm done. 475 00:33:46,960 --> 00:33:48,917 Thank you for asking, though. 476 00:33:49,480 --> 00:33:51,995 Why she didn't cut me a mouth hole? 477 00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:56,592 How am I supposed to--? Whoa, hello! Ooh, ooh! 478 00:33:56,840 --> 00:34:00,356 Looks like I got a visitor down there. Ha, ha. 479 00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:02,873 Damn it! 480 00:34:03,080 --> 00:34:07,120 Ding, dong, ditch. Somebody rang my bell, then ran away. 481 00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:09,837 Feel like I'm fucking Casper. 482 00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:12,077 Hey, you know, it's-- It's-- 483 00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:14,994 It's getting seriously hard to breathe under here. 484 00:34:15,200 --> 00:34:19,240 - Can I take this off my face? - No! No. 485 00:34:24,120 --> 00:34:25,998 Can you dump Frank at DFS? 486 00:34:26,200 --> 00:34:28,317 I gotta drop some stuff off for Carl. 487 00:34:28,520 --> 00:34:30,671 Not a problem. 488 00:34:34,720 --> 00:34:37,758 Let's go, Frank. Showtime. 489 00:35:15,000 --> 00:35:19,119 Been a while since I've been in. Maybe I need a new picture. 490 00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:24,592 We had a bad meth run last year and you know what that stuff can do to you. 491 00:35:25,240 --> 00:35:28,597 They've got a website and everything. 492 00:35:30,960 --> 00:35:35,398 Well, now that you've filed your petition to reinstate custody... 493 00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,035 ...we'll need you to sign up for parenting classes. 494 00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:40,351 - Parenting classes? - Good. 495 00:35:40,560 --> 00:35:42,870 Also, there may be some random drug tests... 496 00:35:43,080 --> 00:35:47,313 ...and we'll need to set up a home visit prior to the possible release of the children. 497 00:35:47,520 --> 00:35:51,799 So I will get the class registration. I'll be right back. 498 00:35:53,920 --> 00:35:56,037 Fucking big brother. 499 00:35:56,240 --> 00:35:58,391 I don't want any goddamn parenting class. 500 00:35:58,600 --> 00:35:59,670 What are they? 501 00:35:59,920 --> 00:36:03,311 You sit in a room and they lecture you on how to be Ozzie and Harriet. 502 00:36:04,920 --> 00:36:08,834 I was thinking maybe I could figure out where I went wrong with Karen. 503 00:36:09,040 --> 00:36:12,920 Kids come pre-wired. It has nothing to do with your parenting. 504 00:36:14,080 --> 00:36:17,073 I pretty much like being a blond. 505 00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:21,674 I feel like cotton candy. 506 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:42,513 Hi, uh, my name's Fiona Gallagher. I'm here to visit Debbie. 507 00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:44,479 - She here? - You her mother? 508 00:36:44,720 --> 00:36:49,431 Sister. I just want to say hi. May I see her? 509 00:36:51,800 --> 00:36:54,872 I just want to talk to her. 510 00:36:55,560 --> 00:36:57,756 Hey! 511 00:36:57,960 --> 00:36:59,838 Do all your talking out here. 512 00:37:00,040 --> 00:37:02,874 I'm gonna need her back in 15 for chores. 513 00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,199 You okay? 514 00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:09,835 Yeah, I'm fine. 515 00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:12,872 There a million kids in there? 516 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,112 Just a few, but they're really nice. 517 00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:17,277 And Kamala's not so bad. 518 00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:21,599 Bed's pretty comfortable and there's hot water. 519 00:37:24,640 --> 00:37:28,236 I brought you some books and clothes. 520 00:37:28,680 --> 00:37:32,720 - Do you need any money? - Nope, I'm good. 521 00:37:33,880 --> 00:37:36,839 When do you think we can go back home? 522 00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,352 Soon. Real soon. 523 00:37:44,280 --> 00:37:46,192 I brought you some Hershey's Kisses too. 524 00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:50,679 These were like gold when I was in my first foster home. 525 00:37:50,880 --> 00:37:52,678 Thanks. 526 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,600 Hey, I got your brother's working papers for today. 527 00:38:17,800 --> 00:38:20,998 - Great, I'll give them to him. Thanks. - Where is he? 528 00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:24,159 Uh, latrine. He's been there most of the night. 529 00:38:24,400 --> 00:38:27,552 Turns out eating diarrhea can actually give you diarrhea, so... 530 00:38:27,760 --> 00:38:32,118 Signed. In and out. And I better see him at lights out. 531 00:38:36,560 --> 00:38:40,270 That's it, Liam. Big circles. 532 00:38:43,240 --> 00:38:44,993 Please, come in. 533 00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:49,797 - Carl, Liam! You have a visitor. - Hi there. I'm Lanier. 534 00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:53,960 - Hey, Fiona Gallagher. - Fiona. 535 00:38:54,160 --> 00:39:00,680 Hey, look at you two. Hey. 536 00:39:00,880 --> 00:39:02,155 Wow, you look so clean. 537 00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:06,997 Yeah, they make us take baths every night. They have this toilet that cleans your bits. 538 00:39:07,200 --> 00:39:08,873 A bidet. 539 00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:12,152 Sometimes in the summer we use a wacky lawn sprinkler for that. 540 00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:17,037 But we got to watch the spinning arms. We got to watch the spinning arms. 541 00:39:17,240 --> 00:39:19,152 Please, come. Have a seat. 542 00:39:19,360 --> 00:39:22,194 It's nice to see that the boys have someone who loves them. 543 00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:24,915 We're glad you came. 544 00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:31,320 But just to make it clear, we have filed the paperwork to adopt Liam. 545 00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:33,955 And we're seriously considering adopting Carl too. 546 00:39:34,160 --> 00:39:37,710 But know that we would love for you to stay in contact and visit often. 547 00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:41,755 We think it's important for the boys to know where they come from. 548 00:39:41,960 --> 00:39:45,351 Why is my seat wet? Oh, no, Liam. 549 00:39:45,560 --> 00:39:47,756 Did you pee on the couch again? Was that you? 550 00:39:47,960 --> 00:39:52,034 - And the wall too? - Liam, that is a matte finish! 551 00:39:52,280 --> 00:39:55,717 - How the hell are we going to get that out? - It's paint, I can touch it up. 552 00:39:55,920 --> 00:39:59,516 Now, which color is that now, Summer Shadow? 553 00:39:59,720 --> 00:40:05,318 He's just a baby. He didn't mean it. Babies are just so messy. 554 00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:12,476 - Did you do that? Did you do that? - I did it. 555 00:40:14,440 --> 00:40:16,193 All right, I got to get to work. 556 00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:19,837 All right, just give me a minute, okay? 557 00:40:20,320 --> 00:40:22,710 Want to do the honors? 558 00:40:24,000 --> 00:40:27,471 - Is that a rosary for giants? - No. 559 00:40:27,680 --> 00:40:31,037 No, man, they're-- They're Ben Wa beads. 560 00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:34,671 You shove them in my ass and you pull them out real slow. 561 00:40:35,400 --> 00:40:39,076 - How is that fun for me? - Come on. 562 00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:41,875 All right, okay. Just easy on the injured cheek. 563 00:40:42,120 --> 00:40:45,318 - I'll go on the other one, all right? Relax. - Yeah. 564 00:40:56,200 --> 00:41:00,160 - Shit! - What the fuck? 565 00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:02,272 Dad, Dad, hold on. Hold on. 566 00:41:02,520 --> 00:41:05,433 Mandy wasn't enough for you? 567 00:41:05,640 --> 00:41:08,917 You sick piece of shit. 568 00:41:11,440 --> 00:41:12,954 Get the fuck off him! 569 00:41:21,440 --> 00:41:26,231 No son of mine is going to be a goddamn AIDS monkey. 570 00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,910 Sit your ass down, fucking ass-digger. 571 00:41:31,560 --> 00:41:33,313 Jeez. 572 00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:53,315 It's Terry. Send over the Russian. 573 00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:59,237 Okay, role play. All right. 574 00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:02,751 Monica, Frank. 575 00:42:03,280 --> 00:42:05,670 Okay, Monica, you play the teenage daughter. 576 00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:11,990 And Frank, you be the father disciplining her for staying out after curfew. 577 00:42:13,520 --> 00:42:17,309 Um, where the hell were you so late? 578 00:42:18,480 --> 00:42:21,439 I was fucking Mom's boyfriend. What do you care? 579 00:42:21,680 --> 00:42:24,320 You're nothing but a little tramp. Just like your mother. 580 00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,394 You know what? If you weren't stealing from her-- 581 00:42:27,640 --> 00:42:33,238 Bitch gave me herpes. As far as I'm concerned, I deserve every dime. 582 00:42:33,480 --> 00:42:36,552 She fucking well did too. 583 00:42:43,920 --> 00:42:45,513 How was that? 584 00:42:57,760 --> 00:42:59,319 That one. 585 00:43:04,040 --> 00:43:07,317 She's going to fuck the faggot out of you, kid. 586 00:43:08,560 --> 00:43:11,951 Ride him till he likes it, suka. 587 00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:18,479 And you're goddamn gonna watch. 588 00:43:55,920 --> 00:43:59,197 - How many more times? - Until we complete the mission. 589 00:43:59,440 --> 00:44:02,194 Now, come on, baby. You're Luke Skywalker... 590 00:44:02,400 --> 00:44:07,634 ...and it's up to you to shoot one in and destroy the Death Star. 591 00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:11,192 Okay. Where's the sheet? 592 00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:13,517 No. No, I couldn't breathe last time. 593 00:44:13,720 --> 00:44:16,189 Well, we got to put a Guantanamo hood on her. 594 00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:18,392 - I don't know why I can't drink. - Shut up. 595 00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:20,876 It's hard for all of us, so both of you shut up. 596 00:44:21,080 --> 00:44:23,914 Now, everyone, get in your positions. 597 00:44:40,720 --> 00:44:44,475 Come on, man. Don't do this, you piece of shit. 598 00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:46,353 You get hard when you smell pork chops. 599 00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,473 Yelling at it is not gonna help. Come here. 600 00:44:58,440 --> 00:45:02,229 - Come on, you piece of shit! - Ow, ow, ow! Baby, you can't do that. 601 00:45:02,440 --> 00:45:04,796 You're gonna build calluses, I won't feel dick. 602 00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:07,993 - Right now no one's feeling dick. - You think this is easy? 603 00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:09,759 It's all my fault. 604 00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:16,400 You can't make the little soldier salute if he doesn't see an officer in the room. 605 00:45:16,600 --> 00:45:19,069 I've lost all my stripes. 606 00:45:19,280 --> 00:45:22,990 Mama, this is not about you losing anything. 607 00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:26,517 It's really me. I'm under a lot of pressure. 608 00:45:26,720 --> 00:45:29,792 - It's all me, Mama. - I haven't had a date in months. 609 00:45:30,000 --> 00:45:35,837 I'm old and fat and unattractive... 610 00:45:36,080 --> 00:45:38,037 ...and I'm gonna die alone. 611 00:45:38,240 --> 00:45:40,994 No, you're not. 612 00:45:42,520 --> 00:45:45,479 Well, this is not helping me get hard. 613 00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:52,356 It's like when a plane goes down, what do they call that? 614 00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:53,829 Shitty? 615 00:45:54,040 --> 00:45:58,557 No, it's never just one thing that causes it. It's a chain reaction. 616 00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:01,832 Cascading failures. That's what this feels like. 617 00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:05,920 Losing my job, losing the kids, dealing with Frank. 618 00:46:07,880 --> 00:46:11,317 Someone recently told me... 619 00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:15,400 ...to stop whining and feeling sorry for myself. 620 00:46:16,520 --> 00:46:17,636 She sounds like a bitch. 621 00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:21,231 Well, she has her moments. 622 00:46:31,080 --> 00:46:35,632 Legally and morally there are acceptable methods of punishment for children... 623 00:46:35,840 --> 00:46:38,150 ...versus unacceptable methods. 624 00:46:38,360 --> 00:46:40,317 Uh, I'm sorry. 625 00:46:40,560 --> 00:46:44,873 Um, just hypothetically, if one's teenage daughter gave birth... 626 00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:47,675 ...to a baby with Down syndrome and then took off... 627 00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:52,636 ...relieving her of all responsibility, if and when she should come back... 628 00:46:52,840 --> 00:46:54,559 ...would you recommend grounding... 629 00:46:54,760 --> 00:47:00,119 ...or in that instance would a firm spanking be more... 630 00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:05,156 You know, before we take any more questions, let's just go over some of... 631 00:47:05,360 --> 00:47:06,476 Give me a Valium. 632 00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:10,071 No, I only have one and it's my safety net... 633 00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,397 ...in case my hypnotherapy doesn't work. 634 00:47:12,640 --> 00:47:16,111 Hypnotherapy is just paying to nap in someone's office. Give me the pill. 635 00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:19,358 - It'll show up in your urine test. - Give me the goddamn pill. 636 00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:22,320 What's the matter with you? 637 00:47:23,440 --> 00:47:25,591 Okay, come on. 638 00:47:26,520 --> 00:47:29,115 Here. Christ. 639 00:47:42,720 --> 00:47:45,394 How is she still ovulating? What, is she part bovine? 640 00:47:45,600 --> 00:47:47,990 Shh. Focus on me. 641 00:47:48,200 --> 00:47:50,920 Now, you're gonna pretend like you're in high school... 642 00:47:51,120 --> 00:47:53,760 ...and you're going to come quickly like a rabbit, okay? 643 00:47:53,960 --> 00:47:55,235 - Yeah. - No, not that quick. 644 00:47:55,440 --> 00:47:57,352 Mama, get in here! 645 00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:07,711 - Not there, honey, no. - Sorry, sorry, sorry. 646 00:48:07,920 --> 00:48:12,995 - You got a shoehorn or something? - Can you not talk, please? Don't say a word. 647 00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:21,351 Are you crying? Oh, God, she's crying. 648 00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:26,157 Please don't cry. I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry, Mama. 649 00:48:26,360 --> 00:48:29,558 Okay! We're gonna do this shit, and we're gonna be done with it. 650 00:48:29,800 --> 00:48:33,350 Kev, get that dick hard. Mama, wipe your tears and focus. 651 00:48:33,560 --> 00:48:38,271 We need to give those little spermies someplace happy to swim to. Lay down. 652 00:48:41,800 --> 00:48:44,679 Mama, get on it. 653 00:49:10,360 --> 00:49:12,192 Hi. 654 00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:15,757 I'm Monica. What's your name? 655 00:49:18,360 --> 00:49:22,400 Frank, wasn't the last time I had to pee in a cup... 656 00:49:22,640 --> 00:49:24,791 ...when I was pregnant with Liam? 657 00:49:25,000 --> 00:49:28,232 Remember that? It was just like yesterday. 658 00:49:28,480 --> 00:49:29,516 Oh. 659 00:50:19,600 --> 00:50:24,152 Uh, sorry, the shower ran out of hot water. 660 00:50:24,840 --> 00:50:26,991 Mama, you want Kevin to take you home? 661 00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:28,554 He can't drive with that leg. 662 00:50:28,760 --> 00:50:32,640 No, but he can get you home in a taxi. It's the least we can do. 663 00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:36,000 Let me get my bag. 664 00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,191 - Hey, Carol. - Hey, Fiona. 665 00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:42,470 Any work at the salon? 666 00:50:42,720 --> 00:50:46,111 Uh, not right now, baby, but I'll keep you in mind. 667 00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:48,118 Thanks. 668 00:50:49,800 --> 00:50:54,113 - What was she doing here so early? - She slept over after she and Kevin had sex. 669 00:50:54,360 --> 00:50:56,352 - What? - Mama's the best surrogate we got. 670 00:50:56,560 --> 00:50:59,678 Turkey baster didn't work, we had to do it the old-fashioned way. 671 00:50:59,880 --> 00:51:02,679 Jesus, V, I'm so wrapped up in my own pity party... 672 00:51:02,880 --> 00:51:07,159 ...I had no idea what kind of biblical shit you had going on here. 673 00:51:07,360 --> 00:51:11,320 - You okay? - If it works, I'll be fine. 674 00:51:13,240 --> 00:51:16,756 - How's Frank doing in rehab? - So far he seems to be holding it together. 675 00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:19,998 Heading over to DFS now, make sure he got all the paperwork in. 676 00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:21,395 What's with the asparagus? 677 00:51:21,640 --> 00:51:24,758 Know how Popeye gets all big and strong when he eats his spinach? 678 00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,919 That's what asparagus does for sperm. 679 00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:29,356 Hmm. 680 00:51:35,720 --> 00:51:37,791 - You again. - Me again. 681 00:51:38,000 --> 00:51:41,471 Just wanted to make sure Frank showed up and all our paperwork was good. 682 00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,400 He did. He passed his urine test with flying colors. 683 00:51:44,600 --> 00:51:47,513 And, yes, your paperwork is all set. 684 00:51:47,720 --> 00:51:51,031 So now we just wait for a hearing? 685 00:51:52,680 --> 00:51:54,831 You've done good, Fiona. 686 00:51:55,040 --> 00:51:59,273 You are a great sister and those kids are lucky to have you. 687 00:52:05,400 --> 00:52:08,199 How did we show up on DFS radar? 688 00:52:08,400 --> 00:52:12,314 It was an anonymous phone call, actually. 689 00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:15,837 Bet it was that bitch we turned away from daycare because her kid stunk. 690 00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:18,555 Um, no. 691 00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,152 - It was a man, actually. - A man? 692 00:52:23,800 --> 00:52:27,077 It's never a man. Men don't give a shit. 693 00:52:28,080 --> 00:52:31,676 How is it fair that someone can make a call and completely ruin our lives... 694 00:52:31,880 --> 00:52:34,520 ...and they get to be anonymous? 695 00:52:37,440 --> 00:52:38,954 I have to go to the restroom. 696 00:52:39,160 --> 00:52:42,710 I'd appreciate it if you didn't click on this file while I'm gone. 697 00:53:06,040 --> 00:53:12,719 Yes, hello, I would like to report a negligent situation. 698 00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:16,470 2119 North Wallace. Gallagher. 699 00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:18,160 And what's the situation? 700 00:53:18,360 --> 00:53:23,355 Six kids living in squalor. No parental supervision. 701 00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:28,476 When the father is there, he's drunk. He hits them. 702 00:53:28,720 --> 00:53:34,034 Not that they don't deserve it. They're all criminals, delinquents, vile-- 703 00:53:34,240 --> 00:53:37,472 Excuse me, sir. Could you give me your name, please? 704 00:53:37,680 --> 00:53:40,070 I would like to remain anonymous. 705 00:53:40,320 --> 00:53:42,198 Thanks for bringing this to our attention. 706 00:53:42,440 --> 00:53:46,798 No, thank you, and God bless you.