1 00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:05,473 For you who are too fucking busy, this happened on Shameless. 2 00:00:05,640 --> 00:00:07,040 What the fuck you looking at? 3 00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:08,839 This is my home. 4 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,912 I am an important part of this family. 5 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:14,312 No, you're not. You don't live here anymore. 6 00:00:14,480 --> 00:00:15,630 Catch. Open it. 7 00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:17,598 I sort of have a boyfriend. 8 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:19,911 - Well, I sort of have a wife. - He's always been a problem. 9 00:00:22,400 --> 00:00:24,596 I want her to be an American citizen, Steve. 10 00:00:24,760 --> 00:00:27,958 When Immigration comes, you will be her husband. 11 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:30,510 Beto is out front. He follows me wherever I go. 12 00:00:30,680 --> 00:00:32,433 He's harmless. 13 00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,398 Aah! Fuck! 14 00:00:34,560 --> 00:00:36,233 Daddy's good with babies. 15 00:00:36,400 --> 00:00:38,357 Howdy, folks. Need help with that baby? 16 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:41,115 I got a proposition for you, Sheils. Let me stay. 17 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:44,159 You'll get eight hours of sleep a night. I promise you that. 18 00:00:44,320 --> 00:00:45,674 I know what I'm doing. 19 00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:50,040 Are you supposed to give Valium to a baby? 20 00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:54,319 I lost a hundred dollars doing this night. I'm just trying to better our situation. 21 00:00:54,480 --> 00:00:56,870 The only way to make money when you're poor... 22 00:00:57,040 --> 00:00:58,952 ...is to steal it or scam it. 23 00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:01,800 I know you want me to find Jesus. I already found him. 24 00:01:01,960 --> 00:01:04,680 I'm looking for Kev. 25 00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:06,479 I'm his wife. 26 00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:05,555 Hey. 27 00:03:06,320 --> 00:03:07,800 Hey. 28 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:09,550 You're awake. 29 00:03:09,720 --> 00:03:11,552 Never fell asleep. 30 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,158 Just go talk to him. 31 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:17,074 Not his fault the crazy ex-wife showed up out of nowhere. 32 00:03:17,240 --> 00:03:19,436 She's not his ex, she's his wife. 33 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,915 And you should have seen his face when he saw her. 34 00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:29,156 This house is so quiet. 35 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:35,080 Kids, breakfast! 36 00:03:35,240 --> 00:03:37,960 - Jeez, Fiona! - This shit is all in your head, V. 37 00:03:38,120 --> 00:03:41,079 This house ain't quiet and she is not Kev's wife. You are. 38 00:03:41,280 --> 00:03:42,475 Go talk to him. 39 00:03:49,480 --> 00:03:50,755 - Uhn. - Okay. 40 00:03:50,920 --> 00:03:52,195 I need coffee. 41 00:03:52,880 --> 00:03:55,554 - We're out of filters. - We can use paper towels. 42 00:03:55,720 --> 00:03:57,916 - We're out of paper towels. - Diapers will work. 43 00:04:00,480 --> 00:04:03,552 - You have to go to work? - Yeah. 44 00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:06,275 - Can we just reschedule the doctor thing? - No. 45 00:04:06,440 --> 00:04:09,797 The vaccine schedule is very important. 46 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:11,189 You can't be late? 47 00:04:11,360 --> 00:04:14,034 How busy can a tattoo parlor be in the morning? 48 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:16,920 Morning to us. Some people, it's the end of a long night. 49 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:19,436 Good morning. 50 00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:21,432 No breakfast? 51 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:24,593 I haven't had a lot of energy for shopping lately. 52 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:26,558 Nanny Frank to the rescue. 53 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:30,191 The Hymster and I will go on a little field trip to the grocery store. 54 00:04:30,360 --> 00:04:32,750 Just need some cash, right, buddy? 55 00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:35,037 You still drunk, Frank? 56 00:04:39,480 --> 00:04:42,279 Fine. Oh, damn, I gotta go. 57 00:04:43,240 --> 00:04:45,516 I'll grab coffee on the way to work. 58 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:49,315 Too-doo-loo. Boop. 59 00:05:04,800 --> 00:05:06,120 I'm awake! Oh. 60 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:09,637 Go catch some Z's, Sheils. 61 00:05:10,280 --> 00:05:12,590 - I got the little guy. - I can't. 62 00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:16,470 Hymie has his first well-baby appointment today at the pediatrician. 63 00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:20,953 Doctor require some kind of co-pay for this unnecessary visit? 64 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:23,555 Of course he does. 65 00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,838 Doctors are thieves, little Hymster. 66 00:05:27,000 --> 00:05:30,072 They just have degrees to keep them out of jail. 67 00:05:30,240 --> 00:05:32,630 Go on. I'll take him. 68 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:35,474 - You will? Frank. - Yeah. 69 00:05:35,640 --> 00:05:38,109 Oh, Frank. Bless you, Frank. 70 00:05:38,280 --> 00:05:40,556 Bless you. Bless you. 71 00:05:41,360 --> 00:05:42,760 Let me-- Here. 72 00:05:42,920 --> 00:05:45,515 - Here. Here you go. - That'll do it. 73 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:46,909 Look at that. 74 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,800 Wait, don't you need the address? 75 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,389 - Where is she? - She's still sleeping. 76 00:06:05,080 --> 00:06:07,800 She did not just show up here because her car broke down. 77 00:06:07,960 --> 00:06:11,351 - What, you think she broke it on purpose? - She broke you on purpose. 78 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,350 She broke you and I put you back together. 79 00:06:14,560 --> 00:06:18,395 - Now she's here to take back what I fixed. - V, look. Look at this. 80 00:06:18,600 --> 00:06:20,239 Divorce papers. 81 00:06:20,440 --> 00:06:24,195 I got them off the Internet. This is my chance to make it official. 82 00:06:24,400 --> 00:06:26,119 Why didn't you say that last night? 83 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:30,075 Because you were yelling some shit about my face, then slept at Fiona's. 84 00:06:30,280 --> 00:06:32,397 Well, I was right about your face. 85 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:38,114 Morning. 86 00:06:38,280 --> 00:06:39,680 Hey. 87 00:06:39,840 --> 00:06:42,196 I made you coffee. Super strong like you like it. 88 00:06:42,520 --> 00:06:45,718 Yay. Kevy-caf. My fave. 89 00:06:45,920 --> 00:06:49,516 - Kevy-caf? - Decaf, full-caf, Kevy-caf. 90 00:06:49,720 --> 00:06:51,712 For when you need a real kick in the ass. 91 00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:54,190 - Can I watch some TV? - Yeah. 92 00:06:55,640 --> 00:06:58,394 - That's how she likes it. - Mm. 93 00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:01,030 Your bed is so comfy. I slept like a baby. 94 00:07:01,200 --> 00:07:04,193 - You slept in our bed? - I stayed in the guest room. 95 00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:07,916 - I haven't smelled that smell in so long. - What smell? 96 00:07:08,080 --> 00:07:10,436 His cologne. On the pillow. 97 00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:11,636 English Leather. 98 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:15,237 - Like Old Man Carlyle used to wear. - Like Old Man Carlyle used to wear. 99 00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:18,199 - Old Man Carlyle? - Foster home where we met. 100 00:07:18,360 --> 00:07:20,431 Was the best fake dad we ever had. 101 00:07:20,600 --> 00:07:22,990 You know Junior's going to prison. Tax evasion. 102 00:07:23,160 --> 00:07:24,753 Junior Carlyle? No shit? 103 00:07:24,960 --> 00:07:26,713 - No shit. - No shit. 104 00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:33,829 Six frozen OJs for the price of five. 105 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:36,879 Twenty percent off mac and cheese. And I have four of these. 106 00:07:37,040 --> 00:07:39,271 - One coupon per customer. - It doesn't say that. 107 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:42,274 - Doesn't have to, it's implied. - Tina, it's time for break. 108 00:07:42,480 --> 00:07:44,915 Why don't you have Kim take over your station? 109 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:48,232 Oh, my God, is that snot? 110 00:07:48,440 --> 00:07:50,318 Sorry. Kids, summer colds. 111 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:53,639 - I have four coupons. - I told you, one per customer. 112 00:07:53,800 --> 00:07:55,678 - Watch your tone. - I'll watch my tone... 113 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:59,151 - ...when you teach your kids to use Kleenex. - I have four coupons. 114 00:07:59,320 --> 00:08:01,676 I dug through the neighbor's trash to get them. 115 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:04,036 Tina. Break time. Let's go. 116 00:08:04,200 --> 00:08:07,477 You know what? Fine. Take it. Take all it. Take it for free. 117 00:08:07,640 --> 00:08:09,518 I don't give a shit! You hear me? 118 00:08:09,680 --> 00:08:13,560 I don't give a shit! Take your own break. And you can keep my last paycheck. 119 00:08:13,760 --> 00:08:14,910 I won't be coming back. 120 00:08:15,080 --> 00:08:18,915 Keep taking this shit if you want to, but I'm out, bitches. Out! 121 00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:22,278 Why don't we just talk for a sec here, Tina? Okay. 122 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:26,709 I shouldn't have pushed hard on the coupon thing. 123 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:29,031 Just stay here and bag the groceries. 124 00:08:29,200 --> 00:08:30,600 We didn't pay. 125 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,353 She said we could have them. 126 00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:34,595 Excuse me. 127 00:08:35,120 --> 00:08:36,600 Excuse me. 128 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:38,399 - Are you the manager? - Yes. 129 00:08:38,560 --> 00:08:41,758 I'm sorry you had to hear that language with your children present. 130 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:45,914 If you'd follow me to my office, I'd be happy to give you a coupon for a free ham. 131 00:08:46,080 --> 00:08:49,198 That'd be great. But it seems like she kind of quit back there... 132 00:08:49,360 --> 00:08:52,273 ...so I was thinking there might be a job opening? 133 00:08:52,640 --> 00:08:56,031 - Hm. What's your name? - Fiona Gallagher. 134 00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,830 You know what? Why don't you follow me, Fiona Gallagher? 135 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,914 So right place, right time, huh? 136 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:07,391 Hope so. I'm responsible, and a really hard worker. 137 00:09:07,560 --> 00:09:09,950 - You ever work as a cashier? - Sure, absolutely. 138 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:14,234 So tell me, Fiona. 139 00:09:14,960 --> 00:09:17,236 How do you feel about deli meats? 140 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:18,754 Deli meats? 141 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:22,596 I'm not big on olive loaf, barfed it up once when I was a kid. 142 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,639 - But mostly I like them. - Good. That's good. 143 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:27,917 I ask because, you know... 144 00:09:28,080 --> 00:09:31,391 ...if you're gonna work here, I gotta see how you handle the meat. 145 00:09:32,600 --> 00:09:35,718 We sell franks and beans too. We sell... 146 00:09:35,880 --> 00:09:37,360 ...hot dogs. 147 00:09:37,520 --> 00:09:40,672 Corn dogs. Three bean salad. 148 00:09:40,840 --> 00:09:42,160 Cream cheese. 149 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:46,554 Ha. Wow. You're saying that if I blow you, I can have a job? 150 00:09:47,160 --> 00:09:51,074 No. I would never say that. That would be inappropriate and illegal. 151 00:09:51,240 --> 00:09:53,197 If you wanted to blow me... 152 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,960 ...you'd have to be a consenting adult. 153 00:09:58,440 --> 00:10:00,671 Morning, Frank. Who's your handsome friend? 154 00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:02,797 You hear that, Hymie? That's Kate. 155 00:10:02,960 --> 00:10:05,031 Kate's got good taste. 156 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:08,079 Give me a shot of JB, a pickled egg... 157 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:10,709 ...and a thumbtack. 158 00:10:10,920 --> 00:10:12,354 Thumbtack? 159 00:10:13,480 --> 00:10:16,473 And a Band-Aid. 160 00:10:24,680 --> 00:10:26,353 There you go... 161 00:10:26,560 --> 00:10:28,074 ...and mumps begone. Oh. 162 00:10:29,600 --> 00:10:31,080 Yes, yes, yes. 163 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:35,439 It's all over, little buddy. There you go. There you go. 164 00:10:35,640 --> 00:10:37,472 I'm gonna need another one of these. 165 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:39,199 I'm-- I think I'm-- 166 00:10:39,360 --> 00:10:43,434 Yeah, I'm calling the police and reporting child abuse. 167 00:10:43,680 --> 00:10:46,878 Pbbt. AIDS didn't come from the homos, Kate. 168 00:10:47,080 --> 00:10:50,960 The gays may have helped to spread it with their bloody anal passions... 169 00:10:51,120 --> 00:10:55,831 ...but it originated in vaccines made from the blood of African monkeys. 170 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,516 Interestingly enough, heterosexual monkeys. 171 00:10:59,720 --> 00:11:01,712 - It was homos, Frank. - Ha-ha. 172 00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:03,678 He needs his shots, Frank. 173 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:07,038 Jesus Christ, Kate, kid's already a half-wit. 174 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:08,759 You want to give him autism too. 175 00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:12,038 Now close your mouth before somebody considers it an invitation. 176 00:11:12,200 --> 00:11:14,476 And pour me a goddamn drink. 177 00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:18,071 The stars came out for the Wishing Lane Foundation last night. 178 00:11:18,280 --> 00:11:23,912 Adam Foster, 10 years old and living with a rare form of leukemia, had only one wish: 179 00:11:24,120 --> 00:11:25,839 To meet his heroes, the Bulls. 180 00:11:26,000 --> 00:11:30,233 They did better, giving him courtside seats and a ball signed by the entire team. 181 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:33,950 Holy shit. The whole team? What do you think that'd go for on eBay? 182 00:11:34,120 --> 00:11:36,396 Couple grand at least. 183 00:11:37,160 --> 00:11:38,640 That kid's just got cancer. 184 00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:42,072 Hymie's mentally deficient. That's a permanent condition. 185 00:11:42,240 --> 00:11:43,276 You should know, Frank. 186 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:54,790 That would be an awesome job. Discounts on groceries? 187 00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:56,838 Could help with summer day care costs. 188 00:11:57,040 --> 00:12:01,990 I'm not getting that job. Not gonna happen, so let's just drop it. Okay, Debs? 189 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:11,554 Debs? 190 00:12:17,600 --> 00:12:19,432 Are you kidding me? 191 00:12:20,400 --> 00:12:23,313 Get out of here, you piece of shit. 192 00:12:23,480 --> 00:12:25,995 You better run, you sick bastard. 193 00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:36,438 You okay, Debs? 194 00:12:36,880 --> 00:12:39,952 Listen, you shouldn't have had to see that. 195 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,111 - Can you describe the perp? - Red. 196 00:12:45,320 --> 00:12:47,596 - Really, really red. - Like sunburned? 197 00:12:47,760 --> 00:12:49,956 - She's talking about his-- - The guy, Debs. 198 00:12:50,160 --> 00:12:52,629 What did the guy look like? His face. 199 00:12:52,800 --> 00:12:57,875 How are you supposed to see his face behind that giant, red, one-eyed--? 200 00:12:58,040 --> 00:12:59,235 Got it. Okay. 201 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,790 - You did great. Thank you. - Okay, come on, Debs. 202 00:13:01,960 --> 00:13:04,191 Let's go get you a Bomb Pop or something, huh? 203 00:13:04,360 --> 00:13:06,795 - Why didn't you stab him? - Stab him? With what? 204 00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:09,634 You ride the city bus without a knife? 205 00:13:10,440 --> 00:13:12,909 He was about 30. Tallish. 206 00:13:13,080 --> 00:13:15,834 Long hair, long beard, small dick. 207 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:20,595 You know, because guys with big ones don't need to jerk it at little girls. 208 00:13:20,760 --> 00:13:22,035 Okay. Uh... 209 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,920 - I'll file a report, but-- - But what? 210 00:13:25,080 --> 00:13:27,470 Nobody cares about a pervert on a bus? 211 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:29,597 We'll let the ITC know. 212 00:13:29,760 --> 00:13:32,514 - They'll keep an eye out for the guy. - Thanks. 213 00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:34,478 You did the right thing calling. 214 00:13:34,640 --> 00:13:37,394 Here's my direct line, if you need... 215 00:13:37,560 --> 00:13:39,074 ...anything else. 216 00:13:44,920 --> 00:13:46,718 - What? - "You did the right thing. 217 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:48,394 - Here's my direct line." - Please. 218 00:13:48,560 --> 00:13:52,839 You have less to worry about from him than from the manager at the grocery store. 219 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:55,595 Am I supposed to find comfort in that sentence? 220 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:58,116 Dude wanted a blow in exchange for a job. 221 00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:01,751 - Giving new meaning to "blow job." - Wow? 222 00:14:01,920 --> 00:14:06,472 You grow up in this house, you think that nothing can shock you anymore, and then-- 223 00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,832 What is it with men and their johnsons? 224 00:14:09,000 --> 00:14:14,234 Shaking them on buses, using them to blackmail potential employees. 225 00:14:14,400 --> 00:14:19,555 You know, that was probably a good job too. Benefits. Discounts on groceries. 226 00:14:22,840 --> 00:14:25,674 You know what? He doesn't get away with this shit. 227 00:14:25,880 --> 00:14:28,600 - I'm going back over there. - Want me to come with you? 228 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,872 - No, but can you watch Liam? - Oh, shit. Sorry, can't. 229 00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,316 - You just offered to come. - I knew you'd say no. 230 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:36,278 I got a checkup. 231 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:39,719 Kick ass, take names. 232 00:14:39,880 --> 00:14:41,951 Don't blow anyone. 233 00:14:42,160 --> 00:14:44,994 You let her sleep in our bed? You said she's a crazy bitch. 234 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:48,153 She is. And not a crazy bitch like you're a crazy bitch, like: 235 00:14:48,360 --> 00:14:50,920 "Oh, bitch, you so crazy." No. 236 00:14:51,080 --> 00:14:55,597 She tried to beat me with a frozen fish because I asked if there was more broccoli. 237 00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:57,672 You never know what's gonna set her off. 238 00:14:57,840 --> 00:15:00,071 - What are you doing? Put that back on. - I'm changing. 239 00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:03,990 - Teresa will be here at 2:00. - Who's that? 240 00:15:04,160 --> 00:15:06,629 Notary public gets her hair done at Mom's salon. 241 00:15:06,840 --> 00:15:09,958 So you have until 2:00 to get the divorce papers signed... 242 00:15:10,120 --> 00:15:12,635 - ...or I'll show her who's a crazy bitch. - Hey. 243 00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:14,917 Put your shirt on. Put your shirt on! 244 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:18,357 Hey! I'm changing. Then I'm gonna go take a look at your car. 245 00:15:18,560 --> 00:15:20,313 - Okay. - On that foot? 246 00:15:21,240 --> 00:15:22,276 I can handle it. 247 00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:25,473 If you can handle it, maybe you can handle the dripping faucet. 248 00:15:25,640 --> 00:15:27,040 How'd you do that anyway? 249 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:30,796 Shooting hoop. Snapped my Achilles posting up some local kid. 250 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:35,113 He's huge. He's probably gonna go in the NBA draft next year. 251 00:15:35,280 --> 00:15:38,830 He snapped it falling in the bathtub like an old Florida Jew. 252 00:15:39,040 --> 00:15:41,839 Which was right after the game. It was a delayed reaction. 253 00:15:42,080 --> 00:15:44,436 V, you have that camera you use for titty shots? 254 00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:47,195 I need help with a scumbag at the grocery store. 255 00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:49,920 - Hey, I'm-- - I know who you are. 256 00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:52,151 Ha, ha. V, why don't you go help Fiona at the store? 257 00:15:52,320 --> 00:15:55,518 While you're there, see if there's some more broccoli? 258 00:15:57,280 --> 00:15:59,351 Fine. Come on. 259 00:15:59,560 --> 00:16:03,076 Teresa, here, 2:00. 260 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:07,990 Holy shit. 261 00:16:08,160 --> 00:16:09,196 Lot of red dots. 262 00:16:09,400 --> 00:16:12,438 All those red dots are sex offenders in our neighborhood? 263 00:16:12,600 --> 00:16:15,593 Wait, check this out. Child rapist, three blocks over. 264 00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:17,717 Did five years and out on probation. 265 00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:20,395 - How does a child rapist get five years? - He doesn't. 266 00:16:20,560 --> 00:16:23,359 He gets five years plus the beating of his life. Let's go. 267 00:16:23,520 --> 00:16:25,955 - We were gonna fix the pool. - No, grab the bat. 268 00:16:26,120 --> 00:16:27,952 - Awesome. - You want help? 269 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:31,511 - My dad loves a good posse. - We're forgetting about the guy on the bus? 270 00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:35,356 Hell no. I'm gonna teach you self-defense, Milkovich style. 271 00:16:35,520 --> 00:16:37,637 - Come on. - Yeah, let's go. 272 00:16:38,360 --> 00:16:41,000 Yo, we're going to jump a pedophile. You wanna come? 273 00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:43,800 Oh. Sounds great, but I can't. 274 00:16:46,280 --> 00:16:47,999 You're acting cagey, okay? 275 00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:50,715 There's been an Escalade parked across the street... 276 00:16:50,880 --> 00:16:53,315 ...for longer than makes sense. What's going on? 277 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:56,033 I don't want to know? 278 00:16:57,160 --> 00:16:59,959 Because if you told me, I'd have to tell Fiona... 279 00:17:00,160 --> 00:17:03,836 ...which would upset the delicate peace we've recently established? 280 00:17:06,640 --> 00:17:09,360 - Right. - Have fun wailing on the pedophile. 281 00:17:09,520 --> 00:17:11,000 Is there any way not to? 282 00:17:11,560 --> 00:17:14,598 - Thank you. - No, thank you, Marta. Thank you. 283 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:16,792 Now, you stay strong. 284 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,309 Hello. May I help you? 285 00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:22,711 I hope so. I'm Frank Gallagher. 286 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:27,432 And may I start by saying thank you for all you do for our suffering little ones. 287 00:17:27,600 --> 00:17:30,035 Thank you, Mr. Gallagher. 288 00:17:30,200 --> 00:17:32,760 This is my son, Hymie. 289 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:36,914 He was born with an extra chromosome through no fault of his own. 290 00:17:37,080 --> 00:17:39,720 Down Syndrome. It's a lifelong condition. 291 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:41,280 It's irreversible. 292 00:17:41,440 --> 00:17:42,760 He's a beautiful boy. 293 00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:44,593 Aren't you, Hymie? Yes, you are. 294 00:17:44,760 --> 00:17:51,280 And believe it or not, he is already, at such a young age, an avid sports fan. 295 00:17:51,440 --> 00:17:52,510 Is that so? 296 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:56,959 He can watch a ball dribble up and down a court for hours. 297 00:17:57,120 --> 00:18:01,478 Endlessly fascinated. His little face just lights up with joy. 298 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:06,995 It would be so wonderful if he could see it all happen in real life. 299 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:12,471 I'm sorry, Mr. Gallagher. I think you may be confused. 300 00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:17,080 Our organization works with dying children. 301 00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:19,590 Not children with Downs. 302 00:18:20,280 --> 00:18:22,033 Of course. 303 00:18:22,800 --> 00:18:25,315 Of course. I know that. 304 00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:30,639 It's my other child that's dying. 305 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:32,953 Oh, I'm so-- 306 00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:34,640 Thank you. 307 00:18:48,720 --> 00:18:50,200 Drive. 308 00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:00,556 The fuck you want? 309 00:19:01,040 --> 00:19:04,192 Convicted child rapist just moved in down the street. 310 00:19:04,360 --> 00:19:05,589 Let's get the boys. 311 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:14,992 The fuck is this little parade? 312 00:19:15,160 --> 00:19:16,992 Kid fucker, next block. 313 00:19:25,760 --> 00:19:28,798 - May I help you? - We're looking for Blake Collins. 314 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:31,680 I'm Blake Collins. 315 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:33,709 Oh, shit. 316 00:19:33,880 --> 00:19:37,874 You're the eighth-grade teacher who screwed her student, right? 317 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:39,633 You were on TV. 318 00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:42,872 I didn't screw William. I loved him. 319 00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:46,313 And I did my time. I paid for my mistake. 320 00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:48,676 If love can be called a mistake. 321 00:19:50,560 --> 00:19:54,440 I'm sure there are real criminals you can beat up if you have the inclination. 322 00:19:54,600 --> 00:19:56,478 Now, please, may I close the door? 323 00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,632 Yeah. Yeah. 324 00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:05,911 Shit. Let's go find a camel jockey. 325 00:20:06,120 --> 00:20:08,476 Help Carl get home, all right? 326 00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:10,592 Shit, we should still do something. 327 00:20:10,760 --> 00:20:13,878 - Thinking gang bang? - No, but she fucks little kids. 328 00:20:14,640 --> 00:20:18,600 - It was one kid. And he wasn't that little. - Look, he was 14, she was his teacher. 329 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:20,991 We want a pedophile living in the neighborhood? 330 00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:24,790 Shit, if I was 14 and had a teacher who looked like that and wanted it? 331 00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,316 Damn, I'm getting wood just thinking about that. 332 00:20:27,480 --> 00:20:29,517 Yo, Angie. 333 00:20:30,320 --> 00:20:32,630 - Yeah? - You wanna fuck? 334 00:20:32,800 --> 00:20:34,393 Sure. 335 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:42,959 - Now, see, I thought you two were--? - Shut up. 336 00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:44,999 Hope you're using a raincoat. 337 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,992 You were having sex at 14. 338 00:20:47,160 --> 00:20:49,311 I was having sex with a 14-year-old at 14. 339 00:20:49,520 --> 00:20:52,035 - You think Kash should have gone to jail? - I do. 340 00:20:52,200 --> 00:20:55,750 Almost called the cops a hundred times. Creepy Arab fucking my brother. 341 00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:58,515 I was 15. I was old enough to make my own decisions. 342 00:20:58,680 --> 00:21:02,151 - You were a kid. He was a man. - Says you. 343 00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,359 You want this chick in the neighborhood? Think about Carl. 344 00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:06,670 Carl should be so lucky. 345 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:09,275 What if it was Debbie and a 30-year-old dude? 346 00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:11,750 - It's different. - Bullshit, it's different. 347 00:21:11,920 --> 00:21:14,435 She's not hanging around the park with lollipops. 348 00:21:14,600 --> 00:21:17,115 - She fell in love. - It's got nothing to do with love. 349 00:21:17,280 --> 00:21:21,877 This chick is a standard-issue pedophile and I'm gonna prove it. 350 00:21:31,280 --> 00:21:34,591 - Sorry I'm late. - I hate this INS bullshit. 351 00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:36,956 America is supposed to be free country, no? 352 00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:49,351 Hey! That's a nice outfit. 353 00:21:49,520 --> 00:21:52,831 - It's not an outfit. It's a perv trap. - Is that like a bear trap? 354 00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:55,874 Your titties clamp around the wrist and they have to gnaw off their paws? 355 00:21:56,080 --> 00:21:58,151 - Ha-ha-ha. - Two o'clock. 356 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,710 - I got it. - Hmm. 357 00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:04,196 Tsk. She hates me, doesn't she? 358 00:22:04,360 --> 00:22:06,238 No. She just don't know you yet. 359 00:22:06,400 --> 00:22:08,960 I mean, I get it. I would hate me too if I were her. 360 00:22:09,120 --> 00:22:11,840 I mean, I show up here with my kid in tow. 361 00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:14,037 And you haven't seen me in years. 362 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,910 It's almost like I'm trying to get you back or something. 363 00:22:18,360 --> 00:22:21,353 But honestly, Kev, I don't even know if Kyle's yours. 364 00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:26,197 I was really getting around back then, so V has nothing to worry about. 365 00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:30,833 What? What I say? 366 00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:32,959 You think Kyle could be mine? 367 00:22:33,160 --> 00:22:34,753 You didn't do that math? 368 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:36,877 Shit. Sorry. 369 00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:40,472 Cancer? 370 00:22:41,640 --> 00:22:43,632 How did I get cancer? 371 00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:45,877 You must have caught it from Grammy, son. 372 00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:48,271 If she had known she had the contagious kind... 373 00:22:48,440 --> 00:22:52,116 ...I don't think she would have spent so much time with you cooking meth. 374 00:22:52,280 --> 00:22:54,237 Am I going to die? 375 00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:57,954 I hope not. 376 00:22:58,480 --> 00:23:02,394 But right now, we have to fight and fight hard. 377 00:23:03,880 --> 00:23:06,634 You ready to fight with me, Carl? 378 00:23:11,800 --> 00:23:13,314 Why do we have to shave it? 379 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:15,676 Didn't you ever see any shows about cancer? 380 00:23:15,840 --> 00:23:18,355 Cancer people are always bald. 381 00:23:19,080 --> 00:23:23,359 - Grammy wasn't bald. - Grammy hated life. She wanted to die. 382 00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:25,079 But you love life. 383 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:28,119 And one of the most important ways you can fight cancer... 384 00:23:28,280 --> 00:23:30,875 ...is to let the sun rays in through your skull. 385 00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:37,358 - Why are you shaving Carl's head? - Lice. 386 00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:39,517 Since when do you... 387 00:23:40,120 --> 00:23:42,430 - ...parent? - Since you dropped the ball. 388 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:45,513 The vermin were literally jumping off his scalp. 389 00:23:47,200 --> 00:23:49,157 Make sure you wash his sheets too, okay? 390 00:23:49,680 --> 00:23:51,831 I look like a woman? 391 00:23:52,640 --> 00:23:55,439 - I have lice too? - Yes. 392 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:57,751 - Yes, you do. - Fiona's gonna freak out. 393 00:23:57,960 --> 00:24:02,955 No, Fiona is not going to freak out because Fiona is not going to know. 394 00:24:03,120 --> 00:24:07,194 You're a man now, Carl. The cancer makes you a man. 395 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:09,272 And as a man... 396 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:13,036 ...it's your job to keep secrets from the women who love you. 397 00:24:14,440 --> 00:24:17,638 Jeez. I'm gonna look like a penis. 398 00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:22,960 I'll get you a hat. 399 00:24:26,440 --> 00:24:27,874 - Yes? - Hi. 400 00:24:28,040 --> 00:24:29,713 How you doing? I'm Lip. 401 00:24:29,880 --> 00:24:32,918 Short for Phillip. I just live right over on 64th. 402 00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:35,800 I'm gonna be a sophomore next year at Lincoln. 403 00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:40,318 I was walking by your yard, and it looks pretty overgrown. 404 00:24:40,480 --> 00:24:42,153 I was wondering... 405 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:44,710 ...can I trim your hedges? 406 00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:46,274 Like, five bucks an hour? 407 00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:49,437 - "May I trim your hedges." - Oh. 408 00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:50,920 Right. Yeah. Sorry. 409 00:24:51,800 --> 00:24:53,871 May I trim your hedges? 410 00:24:59,480 --> 00:25:01,392 Yeah. 411 00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:03,557 Yeah. It's good. It's good. We're good. 412 00:25:03,720 --> 00:25:06,110 - No! - We're taking fake wedding pictures... 413 00:25:06,280 --> 00:25:10,035 - ...for the INS. No one's gonna see the dress. - The INS will see me. 414 00:25:10,200 --> 00:25:13,511 And if I look like cow, they will know it fake. 415 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,115 And I will get deported because of this. 416 00:25:16,320 --> 00:25:17,754 And you will go to prison. 417 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:22,719 - She's your wife. - No. 418 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:26,391 - You married her before God, no? - No. I married her before her father... 419 00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:29,997 ...who had a gun pointed at my nuts. It's different somehow. 420 00:25:40,640 --> 00:25:42,677 Buy something. 421 00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:48,798 Eighty-nine cents. 422 00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,880 - I don't get it. - Take the cup out of the trash. 423 00:25:59,040 --> 00:26:00,918 Oh, the stuff's in it. Okay. 424 00:26:01,120 --> 00:26:02,520 Just get out. 425 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:05,434 You need whatever brain cells you got left. 426 00:26:10,080 --> 00:26:13,517 - Why you gotta mess with my business? - Why do your business in my store? 427 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,240 - Ain't your store. It's towelhead's store. - Whatever. 428 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:19,598 Get smarter customers. Because I'm not going down for this shit. 429 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:21,712 Oh, okay. 430 00:26:21,880 --> 00:26:25,191 So, what you going down for then, huh? 431 00:26:33,880 --> 00:26:36,998 Hey, did you really fuck Angie Zahgo today? 432 00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:40,600 Yeah, I fucked Angie. Everybody fucks Angie. 433 00:26:41,080 --> 00:26:42,639 You don't fuck Angie? 434 00:26:43,240 --> 00:26:46,438 - No. - Huh. 435 00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:49,190 Wanna fuck Angie? I could call, get her down here. 436 00:26:49,360 --> 00:26:51,158 No. 437 00:27:14,240 --> 00:27:15,594 Hey. 438 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:18,637 Ow! Uhn. 439 00:27:18,800 --> 00:27:20,200 Who are you? 440 00:27:20,360 --> 00:27:21,999 - Kyle. - What's your business here? 441 00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:25,238 I may or may not be related to your neighbor Kevin. 442 00:27:25,400 --> 00:27:26,390 Oh. 443 00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:29,434 Okay. Sorry. I'm Debbie Gallagher. 444 00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:33,513 Any idea where I can get a smoke? 445 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:51,677 - Finished already? - Yeah, not quite. I'm just... 446 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:55,119 ...really hot. 447 00:27:56,760 --> 00:27:57,989 Um... 448 00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:01,714 Could I bother you for something to drink? 449 00:28:01,880 --> 00:28:03,234 Juice box? 450 00:28:03,840 --> 00:28:06,560 Yes, please. 451 00:28:07,960 --> 00:28:09,713 Just wait here. 452 00:28:22,840 --> 00:28:24,320 Hi. 453 00:28:25,040 --> 00:28:28,670 - I told you to wait out there. - Yeah, so sorry. I just-- 454 00:28:28,840 --> 00:28:32,311 I wondered if I could bother you for a sandwich too. 455 00:28:32,520 --> 00:28:34,477 I ain't had lunch. 456 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:37,075 You haven't had lunch. 457 00:28:37,240 --> 00:28:40,472 - "Ain't" isn't a word, Phillip. - Right. 458 00:28:40,640 --> 00:28:43,280 Hey, are you a teacher? 459 00:28:44,120 --> 00:28:46,954 I... I used to be. 460 00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:50,113 Oh. Bet you were a good one. 461 00:28:51,600 --> 00:28:54,672 - What kind of sandwich? - PB and J? 462 00:28:56,320 --> 00:28:58,277 With the crusts cut off? 463 00:28:59,360 --> 00:29:01,033 Yes, please. 464 00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:03,112 And you should've heard her going on... 465 00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:05,272 ...about Kev's cologne and old man Johnson. 466 00:29:05,440 --> 00:29:07,318 Anything that I wouldn't know about. 467 00:29:07,480 --> 00:29:09,119 You know what you're doing? 468 00:29:09,280 --> 00:29:12,432 Do I know how to make a man ask me for a hummer? Wait here. 469 00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:20,034 Mm. He was born March, 2001. 470 00:29:21,200 --> 00:29:24,398 - Weren't we together? - No. Remember, we split up that year? 471 00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:28,520 - Got back together after 9/11. - Why'd we break up again? 472 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:31,559 Oh, yeah. You tried to run me over with your car. 473 00:29:32,920 --> 00:29:36,630 Yeah, I don't remember that being funny. It was fucking scary. 474 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,315 Well, as it turns out, it was the pregnancy hormones. 475 00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,118 You were knocked up? 476 00:29:43,480 --> 00:29:44,675 So he is mine. 477 00:29:45,440 --> 00:29:49,514 Tsk. I don't know, Kev. We were off and on that year. 478 00:29:49,720 --> 00:29:51,439 There were other guys. 479 00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:54,553 When you left me, I didn't think I could raise him on my own. 480 00:29:54,720 --> 00:29:58,634 So I gave him to my sister Crystal because she always wanted a kid. 481 00:29:58,800 --> 00:30:02,191 Now she's going through some shit, needed me to take him. 482 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:04,960 And we thought it was time he knew the truth. 483 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:10,914 You thought it was time. You didn't think it might've been time... 484 00:30:11,120 --> 00:30:13,760 ...at any point in the 12 years this kid has been alive? 485 00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:16,071 - I'm really sorry. - You're sorry? 486 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:19,790 - Twelve years, Cheryl. - You left me. 487 00:30:20,560 --> 00:30:24,395 If there was a chance he could've been mine, you should have told me about him. 488 00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:35,158 Did I tell you she called her coffee "Kevy-caf"? Like a pet name. 489 00:30:35,320 --> 00:30:37,630 Like they have some language that I don't speak. 490 00:30:37,800 --> 00:30:40,599 - V, what happened? - Oh. Corn dogs, cream cheese... 491 00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:43,275 - ...I got it all on tape. He's nasty. - Right? 492 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:45,278 Go, he's waiting on you. 493 00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:49,350 I want day shifts. Home by 6. 494 00:30:51,800 --> 00:30:55,077 Couldn't help but notice your wedding ring, Bobby. 495 00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:59,200 - You want your wife to see this tape? - Fine. Days. 496 00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:01,875 Just fill this out. 497 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:04,839 And we'll be taking some veal cutlets for our troubles. 498 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:09,950 Actual veal cutlets. None of your skanky deli meats. 499 00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:21,160 Go, go, go. 500 00:31:29,240 --> 00:31:31,630 That is terrible ugly dress. 501 00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:34,759 Your friend, she must not like you very much. 502 00:31:34,920 --> 00:31:36,070 Let's go. Let's go. Go. 503 00:31:39,840 --> 00:31:41,115 Mm. 504 00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:45,556 Um... You have a little... 505 00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:48,315 - Mm. Ahem. - Oh. Mm. 506 00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,074 No, the other... The other... 507 00:32:01,160 --> 00:32:02,719 Did I get it? 508 00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:04,390 No. 509 00:32:05,840 --> 00:32:08,958 Mm... Can you help me? 510 00:32:18,880 --> 00:32:21,270 - How old are you really, Phillip? - Sixteen. 511 00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:24,794 Almost. 512 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,994 But I've always felt like an old soul. 513 00:32:34,120 --> 00:32:36,077 Oh! Aah. 514 00:32:36,240 --> 00:32:40,553 - You mustn't tell anyone. - No, I won't, I won't. I promise you. 515 00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:44,236 You're such a good teacher. I feel like I got so much to learn from you. 516 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,079 "Have." You have so much to learn. 517 00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:47,435 - I do. - You do. 518 00:32:55,400 --> 00:32:57,596 - I gotta go. - Go? 519 00:32:57,760 --> 00:33:00,480 - Yeah, homework. Mm. - In the summer? 520 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:02,558 - Shit. - Don't go, Phillip. 521 00:33:02,720 --> 00:33:05,315 I have more to teach you. Come with me, Phillip. 522 00:33:05,480 --> 00:33:07,995 - I... I-- - Shh. Don't worry. Don't be scared. 523 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:10,470 Okay? I'll teach you. 524 00:33:12,880 --> 00:33:16,840 - Are you coming, Phillip? - Yeah. Yes. Coming. 525 00:33:17,000 --> 00:33:18,992 Bring the peanut butter. 526 00:33:30,000 --> 00:33:32,071 Nice place you got here. 527 00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:35,150 What are you doing here? 528 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:38,871 I was hungry. 529 00:33:39,040 --> 00:33:41,953 So you drove all the way to the Southside for a bag of chips? 530 00:33:42,160 --> 00:33:46,677 Well, a bag of chips and a ginger snap, I'm hoping. 531 00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:50,197 - Keep the change. - I'm working. 532 00:33:52,280 --> 00:33:56,274 Well, maybe later. Happy hour at the Fountain. 533 00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:59,194 Yeah. Okay. 534 00:34:00,000 --> 00:34:01,434 Okay. 535 00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:06,798 You got a receipt? 536 00:34:23,480 --> 00:34:26,439 - That your grandpa? - No. Just a guy I've been seeing. 537 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:30,276 Oh. That's a guy you've been seeing. 538 00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:33,919 You guys, like, picnic together? 539 00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:36,834 Or gonna get a little dog with a fucking sweater? 540 00:34:37,000 --> 00:34:39,515 No. We don't picnic. We mostly just fuck. 541 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:42,033 Like you and Angie. 542 00:34:44,120 --> 00:34:47,750 That image. It's, like, scorched behind my eyes... 543 00:34:47,920 --> 00:34:50,037 ...like a fire breathing, one-eyed dragon. 544 00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:54,879 You don't have to smoke, you know. It's cooler if you don't. 545 00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:56,759 - Really? - Everyone smokes. 546 00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:59,310 You're only a rebel if you don't. 547 00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:02,835 Have you ever seen one in real life? 548 00:35:03,000 --> 00:35:05,959 Like on a grown-up? When it's... 549 00:35:06,720 --> 00:35:08,359 ...like that? 550 00:35:08,520 --> 00:35:10,955 Yeah. I watch lots of porn. 551 00:35:11,120 --> 00:35:13,680 It's way different in real life than those sketches... 552 00:35:13,880 --> 00:35:15,872 ...they show you in health class, right? 553 00:35:17,240 --> 00:35:18,799 What's Kev like? 554 00:35:18,960 --> 00:35:23,193 Is he cool or is he batshit like everyone else in my family? 555 00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:28,159 No, Kev's cool. Nice. Like you. 556 00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:33,800 I think I may become a nun. Nuns don't have sex, right? 557 00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:35,474 You're pretty. 558 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:38,317 Too pretty to be a nun. 559 00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:04,670 Hey, T. What's up, girl? You look skinny. 560 00:36:04,840 --> 00:36:08,151 Don't sweet talk me, V, I've been sitting here for almost an hour. 561 00:36:08,320 --> 00:36:10,118 - What? Kev never showed up? - No. 562 00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:13,193 Nobody's here to sign anything, nobody's here to pay me... 563 00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:16,990 ...and I sure as shit didn't cart my ass all the way down here for free. 564 00:36:17,160 --> 00:36:19,959 Hey, you, kid. Where's your mother? 565 00:36:20,120 --> 00:36:22,316 She and Kev went to go get a drink. 566 00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:25,837 - He was freaking about the whole kid thing. - What whole kid thing? 567 00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:28,754 About how I may be Kev's kid? 568 00:36:31,560 --> 00:36:34,712 - Debs, be home for dinner. - I will. 569 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:36,752 V? 570 00:36:36,960 --> 00:36:39,191 Veronica. Where's my $40? 571 00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:42,319 Here, here. I got it. Here you go. 572 00:36:47,240 --> 00:36:48,594 Hi. 573 00:36:54,480 --> 00:36:57,040 Am I--? Am I gonna get as sick as them? 574 00:37:00,480 --> 00:37:01,880 Only time will tell. 575 00:37:02,040 --> 00:37:04,874 The good news is the cancer's in your brain... 576 00:37:05,040 --> 00:37:09,193 ...and you never were much of a thinker, so it probably won't affect you that much. 577 00:37:11,600 --> 00:37:14,354 - Oh, God. Oh, God! - Wait. Wait. 578 00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,830 You need to learn to wait, Phillip. Hold it back. 579 00:37:17,040 --> 00:37:20,636 - I'll get hard again. - It gets better if you delay gratification. 580 00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:23,400 The joy, it's even bigger. Just wait, okay? 581 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:25,438 Okay, that's... Wow. 582 00:37:25,600 --> 00:37:27,353 That's really fucking good. 583 00:37:27,520 --> 00:37:29,671 What is that? What is that that tingles? 584 00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:32,799 What is that, some kind of sex cream or something? 585 00:37:32,960 --> 00:37:35,680 It's so... 586 00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:38,036 God, I don't think I can wait. 587 00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,432 No, no, no. You can do it, Phillip. You're my A-plus student. 588 00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:43,478 - Okay? Breath deeper. - Mm. 589 00:37:43,640 --> 00:37:45,791 Slowly. 590 00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:49,112 - Mm-hm. - Slowly. Slow. 591 00:37:49,280 --> 00:37:50,714 Okay? 592 00:37:51,560 --> 00:37:53,392 - Okay. - Good. 593 00:37:55,240 --> 00:37:58,597 What's--? What's that? Ah. That's weird. 594 00:38:00,000 --> 00:38:02,560 That's cold. What is that? 595 00:38:02,720 --> 00:38:06,600 You trimmed my hedges. Now I am trimming yours. 596 00:38:06,800 --> 00:38:09,315 Wait, what--? What is that? Fucking Nair? 597 00:38:09,480 --> 00:38:12,234 Fresh and clean now, just like a baby, Phillip. 598 00:38:12,400 --> 00:38:14,596 - Ha-ha. - Wait, no. Wha--? 599 00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:16,753 Oh, shit. 600 00:38:16,920 --> 00:38:18,718 You said you catered to dying children. 601 00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:22,600 Sir, the Bulls only give us so many packages per season... 602 00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:25,673 - ...and it takes months. - What the fuck, Frank? 603 00:38:25,840 --> 00:38:28,514 That's going on all day, every day. 604 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:32,276 My son is suffering. Have you no soul? 605 00:38:32,440 --> 00:38:34,238 If you fill out an application now... 606 00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:38,030 - ...I can almost guarantee that for next year-- - He doesn't have a year. 607 00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:41,320 Oh. 608 00:38:41,720 --> 00:38:43,154 There's a camp. 609 00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:47,314 All the spots are full, but there's a quadriplegic. 610 00:38:47,480 --> 00:38:50,120 He won't get much out of it. I can bump him for Carl. 611 00:38:50,840 --> 00:38:53,196 - Camp? - Like summer camp? 612 00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,079 It's beautiful. On a lake. 613 00:38:55,560 --> 00:38:59,554 A wonderful place for children to feel normal one last time. 614 00:38:59,720 --> 00:39:02,792 What the hell am I supposed to do with a trip to cancer camp? 615 00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:04,952 I've never been to camp. 616 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:10,554 Jimmy. 617 00:39:10,720 --> 00:39:13,155 Come sit with me. I want to show you something. 618 00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:18,000 Come. 619 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:26,792 - Hey. - All of this romantic pretending... 620 00:39:29,040 --> 00:39:31,680 ...it make me so hot. 621 00:39:33,120 --> 00:39:34,839 And wet. 622 00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,076 - Ow. Ow. - Feel. 623 00:39:40,240 --> 00:39:42,471 We should not put all that water to waste, no? 624 00:39:42,640 --> 00:39:44,359 - No? - No. 625 00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:47,596 No, Este, Este, Este, listen. 626 00:39:47,760 --> 00:39:50,480 - I-- I-- - Yes? 627 00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:52,597 I can't. 628 00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:55,320 - I-- I-- - Yes? 629 00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,159 - I can't. - Yes? 630 00:39:57,320 --> 00:40:00,313 - No. I can't. - Aah! 631 00:40:00,480 --> 00:40:03,120 I-- No, I can't. 632 00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:07,069 - Yes! Yes! - Oh, fuck. No. 633 00:40:32,280 --> 00:40:35,398 All right, what are we gonna do? Whose ass am I kicking first? 634 00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:37,199 There's no ass to kick. 635 00:40:37,360 --> 00:40:40,194 Kev's a little boy with a white-picket-fence fantasy... 636 00:40:40,360 --> 00:40:42,591 ...and in walks his wife with his son. 637 00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,753 We don't know that. First thing we do is get a paternity test. 638 00:40:45,960 --> 00:40:47,519 It's not about blood to Kev. 639 00:40:47,680 --> 00:40:52,072 There's a woman he grew up with and married saying her son is his. 640 00:40:52,240 --> 00:40:54,709 - That's stupid. - It's not. Look at you. 641 00:40:54,880 --> 00:40:58,510 You're a mother to your kids, doesn't matter you didn't push them out. 642 00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:04,753 Kev's the first good man I've ever loved, you know? 643 00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:08,231 My first love was named Apollo. Enough said. 644 00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:10,750 - Then there was Spider. - Spider? 645 00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:12,832 You can't make that shit up. 646 00:41:15,920 --> 00:41:19,038 No, I-- I can't fight for Kev. 647 00:41:20,360 --> 00:41:22,556 Asking him to pick me over them... 648 00:41:22,720 --> 00:41:26,680 ...is asking him to change the thing about him that I love the most. 649 00:41:28,240 --> 00:41:30,311 - Screw that. - Fi. 650 00:41:30,480 --> 00:41:33,996 - No. Screw that. - Fiona. 651 00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:36,800 Fi. 652 00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:39,993 Good catch. 653 00:41:40,320 --> 00:41:43,040 Kev! What the fuck? 654 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:45,760 - There's kids. - Think they haven't heard it before? 655 00:41:45,920 --> 00:41:48,071 - What are you, drunk? - No, I'm not drunk. 656 00:41:48,240 --> 00:41:51,870 I'm out of my mind because you and V are the only things that made sense... 657 00:41:52,040 --> 00:41:54,714 ...in this fucked up world. If you can't make it... 658 00:41:54,880 --> 00:41:57,031 ...Jimmy and I should just quit right now. 659 00:41:57,240 --> 00:42:00,312 - I swear to God, if you leave V-- - Who's leaving V? 660 00:42:00,480 --> 00:42:03,393 - You're leaving V? - No. Fiona, what the hell? 661 00:42:03,560 --> 00:42:05,711 The notary, Kev? The divorce papers? 662 00:42:05,880 --> 00:42:07,075 Oh... 663 00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:11,917 Shit. I had some drinks. And Cheryl dropped this kid bomb and... 664 00:42:12,080 --> 00:42:14,072 - Hey. - I forgot. 665 00:42:14,240 --> 00:42:16,038 - You're interrupting. - Excuse me? 666 00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:18,910 Kev's trying to get to know his son. 667 00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:22,117 Give my boys their time. 668 00:42:23,560 --> 00:42:27,156 - Your boys? - No, no. Fiona, it's not what you think. 669 00:42:27,320 --> 00:42:30,154 Look, Cheryl and I have history, that's it. 670 00:42:30,320 --> 00:42:34,792 She's not trying to steal me away from V. She just wants me to meet my son. 671 00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:42,909 I know school was never your thing, but you've never been dumb. 672 00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:47,353 If you don't see what's happening here, just plain dumb. 673 00:42:47,520 --> 00:42:49,637 Come on, Debs, dinnertime. 674 00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:52,235 - Can Kyle come? - No. 675 00:42:55,240 --> 00:42:56,674 All right. 676 00:42:56,880 --> 00:43:00,476 You know, my mother, she reminds me very much of your Fiona. 677 00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:03,798 Beautiful. Raised six kids. Never complained. 678 00:43:03,960 --> 00:43:08,512 A saint. My father, he was a... 679 00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:13,279 - A rolling stone. - She put my hand there. 680 00:43:13,480 --> 00:43:16,552 I didn't even move it. 681 00:43:16,720 --> 00:43:20,680 That is something exactly like my father would have say. 682 00:43:25,800 --> 00:43:29,191 - Did that fatty actually cop a feel? - He totally copped a feel. 683 00:43:29,360 --> 00:43:32,592 You gotta be kidding me. I mean, what's up with that? 684 00:43:33,720 --> 00:43:36,360 Shit, Mickey. What the hell are you doing here? 685 00:43:36,520 --> 00:43:38,239 Oh. From the store, right? 686 00:43:38,400 --> 00:43:40,437 Come on, Ian, don't be rude. 687 00:43:40,600 --> 00:43:44,480 Invite your boyfriend back to my place. I mean, the more the merrier, right? 688 00:43:44,680 --> 00:43:48,720 - I'm sorry, what did you call me? - What? 689 00:43:48,880 --> 00:43:50,872 - Jesus, Mickey. - Faggot. 690 00:43:51,040 --> 00:43:53,430 - What the fuck you call me, faggot? - Enough. 691 00:44:00,000 --> 00:44:02,674 - What the fuck, Gallagher? - They're gonna call the cops. 692 00:44:03,680 --> 00:44:05,034 - Are you okay? - Come on. 693 00:44:06,320 --> 00:44:07,879 - Sorry. - Gallagher! 694 00:44:08,080 --> 00:44:10,072 Sorry. I'll text you. 695 00:44:12,120 --> 00:44:13,679 Oh, shit. 696 00:44:23,800 --> 00:44:25,473 What the fuck is wrong with you? 697 00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:40,195 Where'd you learn this? 698 00:44:40,400 --> 00:44:42,631 Nowhere. Just relax and enjoy. 699 00:44:42,800 --> 00:44:46,157 You been watching porn without me? You know I consider that cheating. 700 00:44:46,320 --> 00:44:49,836 No. I haven't. Although I do consider that rule pretty unrealistic. 701 00:44:50,040 --> 00:44:52,953 I just thought it up. 702 00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:55,077 It's hot, right? 703 00:44:55,240 --> 00:44:57,835 Maybe if I was licking it off you. 704 00:44:58,320 --> 00:45:01,757 - I'm hungry. Trade places. - No. 705 00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:05,357 No? Since when do you turn down a B.J.? 706 00:45:07,200 --> 00:45:09,078 Your dick's not even hard. 707 00:45:17,520 --> 00:45:20,080 What? I did a little manscaping. 708 00:45:22,400 --> 00:45:25,871 Shit. It's not my fault, okay? 709 00:45:26,600 --> 00:45:30,480 What? She's a pedophile! Look, it was a sting operation. 710 00:45:32,040 --> 00:45:36,796 - Look, I took a picture for the cops. - Fuck the cops. They had their chance. 711 00:45:37,920 --> 00:45:39,320 Shit. 712 00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:51,560 - Smells good. - What's with Mandy? 713 00:45:51,720 --> 00:45:53,791 Something she wanted to do. Where's Jimmy? 714 00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:56,270 No idea. 715 00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:58,437 - What happened to your head, Carl? - Lice. 716 00:45:58,600 --> 00:46:00,592 - Again? - Yeah, Frank shaved it. 717 00:46:00,760 --> 00:46:02,513 Yeah, he got me into a summer camp. 718 00:46:02,680 --> 00:46:05,798 - What? Why would he do that? - I don't know. But it's cool, right? 719 00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:07,952 Yeah, that's awesome, Carl. 720 00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:29,832 I'm gonna know my kid. 721 00:46:32,600 --> 00:46:35,718 I gonna know my kid and you can't have a problem with that. 722 00:46:38,600 --> 00:46:43,470 Look, I... I don't care about Cheryl, V. 723 00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:47,711 I used to, but she's nothing but a memory to me now. 724 00:46:47,880 --> 00:46:52,750 And I'm sorry I didn't go see the notary. 725 00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:57,191 But I would never leave you. Ever. 726 00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:00,431 You gotta know that. 727 00:47:03,680 --> 00:47:07,196 After everything we've been through... 728 00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,475 ...you kind of just have to know that. 729 00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:22,400 Whoa. You just snotted the whole table. 730 00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:26,033 Kev? 731 00:47:26,880 --> 00:47:28,678 Kev. 732 00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:35,555 What the fuck? Are they laughing at me? 733 00:47:35,720 --> 00:47:37,154 - No. - Yes. 734 00:47:37,320 --> 00:47:39,118 - Fiona. - Fuck you. 735 00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:41,112 - Excuse you? - Cheryl, listen. 736 00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:43,795 No, I'm done listening. Kyle, go pack our shit now. 737 00:47:44,000 --> 00:47:47,152 - Would you listen to me? - You could've had this and you want that? 738 00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:50,233 She's some kind of nympho. Has three drawers full of dildos. 739 00:47:50,400 --> 00:47:53,199 - What you doing going through my shit? - What's a dildo? 740 00:47:53,360 --> 00:47:56,080 - Cheryl, listen-- - You're as thick as the day I met you. 741 00:47:56,280 --> 00:47:59,239 I get that you're mad, but I wanna be a father to Kyle. 742 00:47:59,400 --> 00:48:03,792 - I'll get you a place nearby-- - He's not yours, Kev. He isn't even mine. 743 00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:06,873 He's my sister's, you stupid piece of shit. 744 00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:11,591 What did she say? 745 00:48:11,800 --> 00:48:14,952 - What did you say? - What the fuck, bitch? 746 00:48:19,280 --> 00:48:22,273 - Should we stop them, or...? - What, you wanna lose an eye? 747 00:48:22,840 --> 00:48:24,069 You crazy bitch. 748 00:48:26,160 --> 00:48:30,200 Crazy bitch. You come into my house and make up some shit like that? 749 00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:32,955 Get your hands off me, you dirty, barren whore! 750 00:48:33,120 --> 00:48:34,998 Barren? 751 00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:38,920 - Shit, the TV! - No! 752 00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:41,833 Not the TV! 753 00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:46,158 Get the divorce papers, Kev. This bitch is about to sign. 754 00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:49,194 - I'm not signing shit! - This way, this way, this way! 755 00:48:51,000 --> 00:48:54,277 You wanna walk away with four limbs? You're gonna sign. The papers! 756 00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:55,760 - Fuck you! - You're signing. 757 00:48:57,400 --> 00:48:59,153 The papers! 758 00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:05,119 Sign it! 759 00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:07,198 If you could initial that too. 760 00:49:14,800 --> 00:49:17,474 Uh-uh. Not one word, just drive away. 761 00:49:21,800 --> 00:49:25,794 - Get the fuck out of here! - Bitch, you so crazy. 762 00:49:26,760 --> 00:49:28,240 Hell yeah! 763 00:49:28,440 --> 00:49:30,477 - Damn right, baby. - Yay! Whoo! 764 00:49:30,640 --> 00:49:31,915 - Yeah! - Here we go! 765 00:49:32,080 --> 00:49:34,072 Hell yeah! 766 00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:39,160 You're still here. 767 00:49:39,320 --> 00:49:41,789 You think I'm getting in a car with that psycho? 768 00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:46,193 Hey, can I borrow your phone? I need to call my mom. My other mom. 769 00:49:46,360 --> 00:49:47,714 Sure. 770 00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:52,279 - You wanna eat dinner first? - Sure. 771 00:49:52,440 --> 00:49:53,874 Cool. 772 00:50:06,840 --> 00:50:09,071 - You Blake? - Yes? 773 00:50:09,240 --> 00:50:12,551 You're moving now, Blake. You're moving tonight. 774 00:50:12,720 --> 00:50:16,999 - Excuse me? - I don't excuse you, you sick bitch. 775 00:50:17,200 --> 00:50:19,396 I don't excuse you because you're hot... 776 00:50:19,560 --> 00:50:22,871 ...because you're blond or because of what you got between your legs. 777 00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:24,514 Come take a look. 778 00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:31,116 You see that? They're digging your grave. 779 00:50:31,280 --> 00:50:34,034 And you wanna be gone before they get down to 6 feet. 780 00:50:34,200 --> 00:50:36,032 - How's it going, boys? - Good. 781 00:50:36,200 --> 00:50:38,669 We dug the Berlanti grave in what, two hours? 782 00:50:38,840 --> 00:50:41,958 But this dirt is nice and soft. Going a lot faster. 783 00:50:42,120 --> 00:50:45,272 Tick-tock, kid fucker. 784 00:50:50,080 --> 00:50:52,231 - Hey. - Hey. 785 00:50:54,440 --> 00:50:56,511 - You look stressed. - I do? 786 00:50:57,960 --> 00:50:59,792 - How was your day? - Good. 787 00:50:59,960 --> 00:51:03,351 - How'd it go at the doctor? - Good. 788 00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:05,034 It's healing. 789 00:51:19,320 --> 00:51:20,959 Hey, hey, hey. 790 00:51:26,720 --> 00:51:31,237 The world's messed up. So much ugly shit happens. 791 00:51:31,440 --> 00:51:34,592 I don't know, Kev and V and... 792 00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:40,517 I trust you. 793 00:51:43,880 --> 00:51:48,671 That's bigger to me than I love you. It's a bigger deal. 794 00:51:50,600 --> 00:51:52,114 I trust you. 795 00:52:22,560 --> 00:52:23,710 Two hundred? 796 00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:26,395 No reason to waste a perfectly good grave.