1 00:00:07,633 --> 00:00:10,375 FRANK: Nobody's saying our neighborhood's the Garden of Eden. 2 00:00:10,552 --> 00:00:14,010 Hell, some people say God avoids this place altogether. 3 00:00:14,431 --> 00:00:18,765 But its been a good home to us, to me and my kids, who I'm proud of... 4 00:00:18,977 --> 00:00:23,687 ...because every single one of them reminds me a little bit of me. 5 00:00:24,107 --> 00:00:29,852 Fiona, my rock, huge help, has all the best qualities of her mother... 6 00:00:30,030 --> 00:00:32,863 -...except she's not a raging psycho bitch. -Blow. 7 00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:36,776 FRANK: Lip, smart as a whip. Straight‘s and the honor roll. 8 00:00:36,954 --> 00:00:39,491 Boy's definitely going somewhere. 9 00:00:39,665 --> 00:00:41,781 [POLICE SIRENS WAILING] 10 00:00:42,501 --> 00:00:44,867 OFFICER: You, come back! Stop! 11 00:00:45,087 --> 00:00:50,377 FRANK: Ian, industrious, conscientious, ambitious, incredible work ethic. 12 00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:54,385 Don't have a clue where he got that from. Wants to be a paratrooper. 13 00:00:54,555 --> 00:00:59,515 Knows how to disembowel an enemy with a roll of dimes and an old gym sock. 14 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:03,935 Carl... Um, I don't really know that much about Carl. 15 00:01:04,106 --> 00:01:05,391 Oh, loves animals. 16 00:01:05,566 --> 00:01:11,232 Always dragging home some poor stray he found, taking them up to his room. 17 00:01:12,447 --> 00:01:17,407 Ah, Debbie, sent by God, total angel. 18 00:01:17,578 --> 00:01:22,493 Raises money for UNICEF year-round, some of which she actually turns in. 19 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:25,039 Liam, gonna be a star. 20 00:01:25,836 --> 00:01:30,170 I'm no biologist, but he looks a little bit like my first sponsor. 21 00:01:30,340 --> 00:01:31,830 He and the ex were close. 22 00:01:32,009 --> 00:01:34,842 Kev and Veronica, fantastic neighbors. 23 00:01:35,012 --> 00:01:37,344 There's nothing they won't do for each other... 24 00:01:38,557 --> 00:01:39,922 ...or to each other. 25 00:01:40,100 --> 00:01:42,591 That didn't hurt half as much as I thought it would. 26 00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:45,010 FRANK: I never realized how little sex I was having... 27 00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:47,770 ...till V and Kev moved next door. 28 00:01:47,941 --> 00:01:52,526 And me, Frank Gallagher, father, teacher, mentor. 29 00:01:52,696 --> 00:01:54,277 Captain of our little ship. 30 00:01:54,448 --> 00:01:58,612 We may not have much, but all of us, to a man... 31 00:01:58,785 --> 00:02:02,118 ...knows the most important thing in this life: 32 00:02:02,956 --> 00:02:06,699 We know how to fucking party. Wa-hal 33 00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,708 [POLICE SIRENS WAILING] 34 00:02:08,879 --> 00:02:09,959 Go! 35 00:02:16,678 --> 00:02:19,294 Fuck you, Pig! 36 00:02:21,099 --> 00:02:23,010 COP 1: Let's go. 37 00:02:25,562 --> 00:02:28,895 -Let's go, people. COP 2: Go home. Let's go. Out. 38 00:02:41,119 --> 00:02:44,782 FIONA: Seven fifteen, monkeys. Come on. 39 00:02:55,133 --> 00:02:56,839 Seven fifteen. 40 00:02:57,010 --> 00:03:01,094 DEBBIE: "Oh, no. I fell down." 41 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:07,725 IAN: First shower. LIP: You had it yesterday. 42 00:03:09,022 --> 00:03:10,637 Fuck! 43 00:03:13,318 --> 00:03:14,353 FIONA: Shit. 44 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,940 -Electric. LIP: Yeah. 45 00:03:23,161 --> 00:03:24,241 IAN: Coming through. 46 00:03:29,543 --> 00:03:31,374 Electric. 47 00:03:31,545 --> 00:03:33,410 -Electric. -E|electric. 48 00:03:33,588 --> 00:03:36,500 No, you got a Happy Meal on the front of that shirt, 49 00:03:36,675 --> 00:03:38,336 Field trip. Need Dad's signature. 50 00:03:38,510 --> 00:03:40,626 DEBBIE: Okay. FIONA: Arms up. 51 00:03:44,307 --> 00:03:47,014 LIP: Deb, that's getting really good. FIONA: Who's got the phone? 52 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,846 LIP: I got it. FIONA: Any minutes left? 53 00:03:49,020 --> 00:03:50,976 Uh, fourteen. 54 00:03:52,482 --> 00:03:54,393 DEBBIE: Hey, I need something for show-and-te||. 55 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:57,230 FIONA: How much are we short? -Eighteen dollars, thirty cents. 56 00:03:57,404 --> 00:04:00,396 LIP: I'm tutoring after school. Should be able to kick in 10 more. 57 00:04:00,574 --> 00:04:03,065 Wait, did Carl put in any? 58 00:04:03,243 --> 00:04:06,326 You're almost 9, you're gonna have to start pulling your weight. 59 00:04:06,496 --> 00:04:10,865 And get a real job, not just dipping into the collection plate at St. Tim's. 60 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:13,283 I'm filling in for Candi. I can cover the rest. 61 00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:15,243 -Extra kraut on mine. IAN: Cheese on mine. 62 00:04:15,422 --> 00:04:18,755 -Somebody's gotta take Liam. -Uh, I got a calculus test. 63 00:04:19,301 --> 00:04:20,541 I'm working after school. 64 00:04:23,889 --> 00:04:25,754 Show-and-tell? 65 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:30,009 Show them the birthmark on his back. It looks like Latvia. 66 00:04:40,238 --> 00:04:42,900 Hey, that's my fucking bike! 67 00:04:59,257 --> 00:05:01,623 WOMAN: No Candi again? -Bobby's got a bail hearing. 68 00:05:01,802 --> 00:05:04,635 That kid's gonna be the death of her. What is it this time? 69 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:07,137 Tried tagging a cop car with the cop still in it. 70 00:05:07,307 --> 00:05:09,468 -What? -Who's got the jumbo dog? 71 00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:11,258 How'd you know? 72 00:05:11,436 --> 00:05:13,677 X-ray vision. 73 00:05:14,731 --> 00:05:16,892 Hey, would you tap that ass? 74 00:05:17,067 --> 00:05:21,686 Once, ifl double bagged it. Project girls don't abort. 75 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:44,124 Hi. I'm here to help Karen study for her midterm. 76 00:05:45,220 --> 00:05:47,051 okay- 77 00:05:47,222 --> 00:05:49,178 You'll have to take your shoes off. 78 00:05:50,141 --> 00:05:53,850 -What? -l'll get you a plastic bag. 79 00:06:00,902 --> 00:06:02,608 Here you go. 80 00:06:03,113 --> 00:06:06,401 KAREN: She's got this thing about people bringing dirt in the house. 81 00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:09,824 -Melissomophobia. -Oh, right. 82 00:06:09,995 --> 00:06:12,987 MAN [ON TV]: Ilike that with the candle. WOMAN: Yeah. 83 00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:19,125 Okay, so if you remember it like this, the formula's completely visible. 84 00:06:19,504 --> 00:06:23,793 Okay. Midget naked witch is bending over... 85 00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:28,336 ...and she's crying because she lost one ear and she can't find it. 86 00:06:30,557 --> 00:06:32,138 How do you know all this? 87 00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:34,971 Just something I like to fool around with. 88 00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:36,260 Like a hobby? 89 00:06:37,147 --> 00:06:38,683 No, more like a plan. 90 00:06:39,149 --> 00:06:40,639 -Physics? -Yeah, yeah. 91 00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:43,684 Have you done Newton's first? I've got a great one for that. 92 00:06:43,862 --> 00:06:46,319 Everybody continues... 93 00:06:46,489 --> 00:06:52,826 ...in a state of rest or uniform motion... 94 00:06:52,996 --> 00:06:58,207 ...un|ess acted upon by an external force. 95 00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:03,419 Uh, hang on. Karen, I'm-- 96 00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:08,713 I'm still gonna have to charge you for this. 97 00:07:09,054 --> 00:07:10,510 Charge me? 98 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:13,296 Yeah, this isn't charity. I get paid for tutoring. 99 00:07:14,184 --> 00:07:18,052 I know. Science just turns me on. 100 00:07:20,815 --> 00:07:22,476 okay- 101 00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:42,959 LIP: Jesus. 102 00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:52,260 FIONA: Lip, you in there? Lip? LIP: Yup. 103 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,671 -Can I borrow your deodorant? LIP: I'm using Ian's. 104 00:07:54,849 --> 00:07:57,682 If I stick this in the wash before I go, keep an eye on it? 105 00:07:57,852 --> 00:07:59,717 -Do it tomorrow. -It stinks in here. 106 00:07:59,896 --> 00:08:01,477 LIP: Sorry, there's a shirt I need. 107 00:08:01,648 --> 00:08:04,560 Fiona. We need to go if we're gonna get a ride to the club. 108 00:08:04,734 --> 00:08:07,225 FIONA: Five minutes. -Look at me. 109 00:08:07,404 --> 00:08:08,940 This has gotta go back tomorrow. 110 00:08:09,114 --> 00:08:11,605 -I'll put it back on later. I have a tag gun. -What? 111 00:08:11,783 --> 00:08:13,774 From when I worked at T.J. Maxx. Let's go. 112 00:08:13,952 --> 00:08:15,488 FIONA: Hot dogs downstairs. Nachos too. 113 00:08:15,662 --> 00:08:17,994 -Have fun. VERONICA: Bye, lovely. 114 00:08:48,695 --> 00:08:50,811 IAN: Hey, Veronica. 115 00:08:56,411 --> 00:08:59,118 116 00:09:03,877 --> 00:09:05,367 [ON SPEAKERS] She won't ever get enough 117 00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:07,160 Once she gets a little touch 118 00:09:07,338 --> 00:09:10,455 lfl had it my way You know that I'd make her say 119 00:09:10,717 --> 00:09:13,299 Ooh 120 00:09:14,137 --> 00:09:16,924 Ooh 121 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:21,553 I said no more sailors And no more soldiers 122 00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:25,437 With your name in a heart Tattooed upon their shoulders 123 00:09:25,607 --> 00:09:28,474 Kisses like whiskey It gets me drunk 124 00:09:30,445 --> 00:09:32,401 --in the morning With the taste of your tongue 125 00:09:33,031 --> 00:09:35,568 In the back of the car On the way to the bar 126 00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:39,951 My purse! Fuck! My purse. That bastard took my purse. 127 00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,664 [SCREAMS] 128 00:09:46,628 --> 00:09:49,995 She won't ever get enough Once she gets a little touch 129 00:09:51,049 --> 00:09:54,212 Shit. Hey! Hey! 130 00:09:54,385 --> 00:09:56,501 Asshole! 131 00:09:58,098 --> 00:10:00,464 Ah! SONY- 132 00:10:00,642 --> 00:10:02,633 That was fucking incredible. 133 00:10:02,852 --> 00:10:06,686 Truly, honestly, one of the most heroic things I've ever seen. Did you see him? 134 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:09,814 -Yeah. -Stupid, but, man, heroic. 135 00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,975 Steve. My name is Steve. 136 00:10:12,153 --> 00:10:15,691 Uh, I was gonna offer to buy you a drink anyway. 137 00:10:15,865 --> 00:10:17,901 VERONICA: Oh. She'll take a drink. 138 00:10:19,494 --> 00:10:22,361 -Hey, where do you think you're going? -Are you serious? 139 00:10:22,539 --> 00:10:24,905 -Where's his stamp? -Can you believe this joker’? 140 00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:27,574 If you were doing yourjob, he wouldn't have had to. 141 00:10:27,752 --> 00:10:30,459 -No stamp, no re-entry. -Is he for real? 142 00:10:31,297 --> 00:10:33,379 Fat prick. 143 00:10:34,008 --> 00:10:36,090 -Fine. You're all barred. -For what? 144 00:10:36,761 --> 00:10:38,217 -Drugs. -What? 145 00:10:38,388 --> 00:10:40,424 He probably let him get away, he knows him. 146 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:42,930 -Shut up, skank. -Watch your mouth. 147 00:10:43,101 --> 00:10:47,060 -Or you're gonna do what? FIONA: Okay, forget it. Please, forget it. 148 00:10:47,230 --> 00:10:51,439 Okay, come on. Let's get a cab. Thank you. Come on. 149 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:03,192 WOMAN: Oh, shit! 150 00:11:06,916 --> 00:11:09,123 DRIVER: Hey, watch it! 151 00:11:09,836 --> 00:11:11,246 VERONICA: Hey, fucker! 152 00:11:13,381 --> 00:11:15,497 You motherfucker! 153 00:11:31,774 --> 00:11:33,014 Got a hummer today. 154 00:11:34,986 --> 00:11:36,647 What's the law on sex with pets? 155 00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:39,357 From Karen Jackson. 156 00:11:40,700 --> 00:11:42,110 -No way. -Yeah, yeah, yeah. 157 00:11:42,285 --> 00:11:45,277 She got a C in physics, needed a B. 158 00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:51,454 Yeah, you wouldn't have waited this long to tell me. 159 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:52,993 Oh, five hours. 160 00:11:53,171 --> 00:11:56,834 -Okay, you're full of shit. -Fuck you. 161 00:11:59,677 --> 00:12:01,213 You ever have a knob-job? 162 00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:05,805 -Once or twice. LIP: Ah. Wow. 163 00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:09,680 I didn't hear you rushing to tell me. 164 00:12:09,854 --> 00:12:11,640 Yeah, well.... 165 00:12:12,815 --> 00:12:17,354 I mean, I thought we tell each other everything. 166 00:12:22,742 --> 00:12:24,482 Unless... 167 00:12:29,582 --> 00:12:32,198 ...you got sucked off by a guy. 168 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,294 For instance. 169 00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:40,920 VERONICA: No way, Lake Forest? Lake Forest is not Chicago. 170 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:42,630 [VERONICA LAUGHS] 171 00:12:43,054 --> 00:12:44,385 FIONA: I'm not kidding, Steve. 172 00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:48,139 You are dead if he ever lays eyes on you. And I mean dead. 173 00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:52,348 I nearly peed myself when you hit him. Well, I did a little. 174 00:12:54,565 --> 00:12:55,600 -Hey. LIP: Hi. 175 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,015 How many of you live here? 176 00:12:57,193 --> 00:13:00,105 Not me, I'm one down. But the guy next door died in March... 177 00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:02,612 ...which technically makes us next-door neighbors. 178 00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:04,238 -You're a nurse? VERONICA: Used to be. 179 00:13:04,409 --> 00:13:05,489 Lying bitch. 180 00:13:05,660 --> 00:13:07,491 She worked housekeeping at Cook County. 181 00:13:07,662 --> 00:13:09,448 -Bedpans and shit sheets. VERONICA: Fine... 182 00:13:09,622 --> 00:13:12,079 ...but I was offered a place in the nursing school. 183 00:13:12,250 --> 00:13:13,911 Fine, but it never happened. 184 00:13:14,085 --> 00:13:16,872 They fired her for selling medical supplies on eBay. 185 00:13:17,046 --> 00:13:19,037 -Shut up. We don't even know him. -Steve. 186 00:13:19,674 --> 00:13:22,040 187 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:24,550 -Debbie. -How you doing, Debbie? 188 00:13:24,721 --> 00:13:27,428 -Nice watch. -Thanks. Panerai. 189 00:13:27,598 --> 00:13:29,759 What'd that set you back about, six bills? 190 00:13:31,144 --> 00:13:34,352 -Plus Ian. STEVE: Hey. 191 00:13:35,481 --> 00:13:38,769 -Hey, Debbie, why do they call him Lip? -His real name's Phillip. 192 00:13:38,943 --> 00:13:42,606 Yo, Veronica. You got my keys? 193 00:13:43,197 --> 00:13:45,688 -What's going on here? -This is Steve. 194 00:13:45,867 --> 00:13:48,324 Decked the bouncer at Purgatory to defend my honor. 195 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,819 -My honor. -Yeah? Which bouncer’? 196 00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:53,329 Jimmy Clifton. 197 00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:57,496 Jimmy Cl»-? Well, Jesus, man, put it there. Respect. 198 00:13:57,670 --> 00:13:59,956 Guy just stands there. Doesn't really do any~ 199 00:14:00,131 --> 00:14:04,295 Yeah, you'll be his third conviction. Third or fourth. Fourth, yeah. 200 00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:05,800 After that much practice... 201 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,803 ...you'd think the man would have manslaughter down by now. 202 00:14:08,973 --> 00:14:11,430 No more fuck-ups like leaving his dad breathing. 203 00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,011 -His dad? KEVIN: Yeah. 204 00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:17,771 Five years over an '87 Monte Carlo with 200,000 miles on the odometer. 205 00:14:17,940 --> 00:14:19,805 A fucking Monte Carlo. 206 00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:22,896 -Okay, time for bed. Up the wooden hill. CARL: It's not even midnight. 207 00:14:23,071 --> 00:14:24,277 DEBBIE: Oh, man. -Come on, go. 208 00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:25,527 -Already? LIP: Shut up. 209 00:14:25,698 --> 00:14:28,314 Move, move, move. Come on. 210 00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:33,533 Yeah, let me just take one last look at you while you're still alive. Ha-ha! 211 00:14:33,748 --> 00:14:34,988 Here. 212 00:14:40,713 --> 00:14:44,581 -What, that's his? -Yeah. Well, company car. 213 00:14:44,759 --> 00:14:46,841 What kind of company? 214 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:48,342 Internet startup. 215 00:14:50,973 --> 00:14:53,009 Earning what? 216 00:14:53,226 --> 00:14:54,636 A couple mil a year. 217 00:14:55,269 --> 00:14:56,634 High school dropout. 218 00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:59,429 Got a job as a janitor in this small tech firm... 219 00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:03,483 ...within a year, he owned it. Made his first billion by 20. 220 00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:06,144 Two jets, controlling interest in the Red Wings... 221 00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:11,066 ...10,000 employees kissing his ass. "Yes, boss. No, boss." 222 00:15:11,244 --> 00:15:14,202 Why shouldn't he ride around in style? 223 00:15:19,168 --> 00:15:21,409 Oh, you just made that up. 224 00:15:22,839 --> 00:15:24,875 What--? Why do you do that? 225 00:15:25,049 --> 00:15:27,711 -Your face. -How is that funny? It's not even funny. 226 00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:31,173 How the fuck would I know how much he earns, you twisted dumb prick? 227 00:15:31,347 --> 00:15:35,056 -I'm not a dumb prick. -Kevin, ljust met the guy an hour ago. 228 00:15:35,226 --> 00:15:36,466 Take back "dumb prick." 229 00:15:36,686 --> 00:15:39,849 Hi, nice to meet you, I'm Veronica. What's your pre-tax income? 230 00:15:40,022 --> 00:15:43,230 You sure didn't mind watching him take his shirt off now, did you? 231 00:15:43,401 --> 00:15:46,313 Not one bit. In fact, if you hadn't walked in... 232 00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:49,695 ...Fiona and I were gonna knock him down and tag-team him. 233 00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:52,608 Now I guess I'm stuck with you. 234 00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:54,651 Hold on. 235 00:15:54,829 --> 00:15:56,535 The Fiona tag team, is that an option? 236 00:15:56,706 --> 00:15:58,788 [BOTH LAUGHING] 237 00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,199 Because, you know, you could throw that.... 238 00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:04,414 VERONICA: Anytime you like it too. -I'll do it, all right. 239 00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:14,383 All quiet up the wooden hill? 240 00:16:15,266 --> 00:16:17,222 As quiet as it ever gets. 241 00:16:17,852 --> 00:16:20,468 Straight answer, if I hadn't busted my skull for you... 242 00:16:20,646 --> 00:16:22,432 ...would you have looked at me twice? 243 00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:24,222 Who's saying that I looked twice? 244 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:26,732 Oh, you did, then? 245 00:16:31,574 --> 00:16:33,610 -What? -We can't. 246 00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:41,329 Ninety percent of the world's problems... 247 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:44,038 ...are caused by tiny words that come in pairs. 248 00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:48,462 I mean, we're healthy and we're happy, but when people ask, we say: 249 00:16:48,841 --> 00:16:50,797 "Not bad." 250 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:55,591 You know, the first time that I saw you dancing... 251 00:16:55,765 --> 00:17:01,977 ...about a month back at Crobar, I was desperate to buy you a drink. 252 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:05,520 You know, normally I'm shy, so I told myself: 253 00:17:05,691 --> 00:17:12,233 ''I can't. She won't. We wouldn't.'' 254 00:17:12,406 --> 00:17:15,944 And then tonight, I see you there again. 255 00:17:16,202 --> 00:17:20,571 All the indications being that I'm getting a second chance... 256 00:17:20,790 --> 00:17:22,826 ...to make a good impression. 257 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,618 Tell me to stop and I'll stop. 258 00:17:38,182 --> 00:17:39,843 Slower, slower, slower. 259 00:17:40,017 --> 00:17:41,507 Slower. 260 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:50,024 Slower. Slower. 261 00:18:03,332 --> 00:18:04,742 [GASPS] 262 00:18:27,315 --> 00:18:31,433 -Ah! Ow, ow, ow! -Almost. Almost. 263 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,351 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 264 00:18:35,031 --> 00:18:37,943 TONY: Fiona? -Shit, shit, shit. 265 00:18:39,577 --> 00:18:42,614 TONY: Fiona. FIONA: Fuck. 266 00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,112 Shit. 267 00:18:46,959 --> 00:18:48,540 TONY: Fiona, are you home? 268 00:18:56,260 --> 00:18:57,375 ls Fiona in? 269 00:18:58,262 --> 00:19:00,298 She's upstairs. 270 00:19:01,182 --> 00:19:02,547 Ahem. 271 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,676 I'll go get her. 272 00:19:09,732 --> 00:19:12,690 -Oh! -Yeah, cops looking for you. 273 00:19:12,902 --> 00:19:14,984 Stay here. 274 00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,696 DEBBIE: Liam. Liam. 275 00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:26,530 FRANK: You-- You think you can't be-- 276 00:19:26,707 --> 00:19:31,918 You think little guys can't be fucking faulting you»- 277 00:19:32,088 --> 00:19:34,875 I wouldn't put him near a carpet till his pants dry a bit. 278 00:19:35,049 --> 00:19:36,414 -Thanks, Tony. FRANK: Nice. 279 00:19:36,592 --> 00:19:38,503 TONY: See you, Fiona. 280 00:19:41,347 --> 00:19:42,427 Who the hell is that? 281 00:19:44,266 --> 00:19:46,257 My dad. 282 00:19:54,318 --> 00:19:56,650 STEVE: You just leave him there all night? 283 00:19:56,862 --> 00:19:59,444 He's never there when I get up. 284 00:20:03,327 --> 00:20:06,785 So who's the little guy? Liam? 285 00:20:08,374 --> 00:20:10,581 Liam's my brother. 286 00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:25,675 [MOUTHS] Fuck. 287 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:35,765 [CAR ALARM BEEPS] 288 00:21:08,768 --> 00:21:10,554 Rita. 289 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:15,638 Anne's school called, she's sick. Everything up to 204 is clean. 290 00:21:15,816 --> 00:21:18,398 -I should be back in a couple hours. -RauI won't care? 291 00:21:18,569 --> 00:21:21,185 He smoked his lunch again. He won't even know. 292 00:21:21,363 --> 00:21:23,695 I'm making tamales tonight. I'll drop off a dozen. 293 00:21:23,866 --> 00:21:24,901 okay- 294 00:21:25,075 --> 00:21:26,110 [RITA SPEAKS IN SPANISH] 295 00:21:26,285 --> 00:21:29,027 -And take all the toilet paper you need. -Okay. 296 00:21:29,622 --> 00:21:34,787 You ready, big man? Let's do it. Come on, here we go. 297 00:21:41,425 --> 00:21:45,964 Kevin, did you miss me, dear? A beer and a bump, and.... 298 00:21:46,138 --> 00:21:48,845 Billy, you having one? Have one. 299 00:21:49,016 --> 00:21:50,472 [CHUCKLING] 300 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,474 Go away, Frank. 301 00:21:52,645 --> 00:21:56,558 A pen, Mr. Beerkeep. It is disability day. 302 00:21:56,732 --> 00:21:58,814 Disability people haven't caught up with you yet? 303 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:02,852 I thought they had some guy following you around with a camera. 304 00:22:03,072 --> 00:22:06,064 They can follow me around all they want to... 305 00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:11,077 ...but they have to actually catch me doing something. 306 00:22:14,083 --> 00:22:17,575 -What's with the crowd? -Layoff at the Chrysler plant. 307 00:22:17,753 --> 00:22:20,916 You see? That's the problem with working. 308 00:22:21,090 --> 00:22:25,003 Too much instability. Stress. 309 00:22:29,431 --> 00:22:30,887 What the fuck is this? 310 00:22:31,100 --> 00:22:33,887 What's left, after I settled out last month's bar tab. 311 00:22:34,061 --> 00:22:35,426 Ohh.... 312 00:22:36,146 --> 00:22:38,683 Better start a new one, then. Oh! 313 00:22:39,108 --> 00:22:41,941 And a round for all my friends from the UAW. 314 00:22:42,111 --> 00:22:43,191 WOMAN: Yeah. 315 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:44,818 [PATRONS CHEERING] 316 00:22:45,114 --> 00:22:47,196 Wow, really? 317 00:22:47,366 --> 00:22:48,606 Fuck, no. 318 00:23:01,797 --> 00:23:03,458 [KNOCKS ON DOOR] 319 00:23:11,307 --> 00:23:12,922 STEVE: Hi. 320 00:23:13,976 --> 00:23:16,217 Wondering what your scheduIe's like on Friday. 321 00:23:17,229 --> 00:23:20,266 Uh, I've got a party. 322 00:23:20,441 --> 00:23:22,773 -Want a chaperone? -You're not eligible. 323 00:23:22,943 --> 00:23:24,353 Right. Chick thing? 324 00:23:26,530 --> 00:23:30,193 -You're not that desperate. -Wanting to see you again's desperate? 325 00:23:30,367 --> 00:23:32,858 No, feeling like you have to, that's desperate. 326 00:23:33,037 --> 00:23:35,198 Come on. You can get laid anywhere. 327 00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:39,703 -Oh, so I'm only here for a fuck? -Never crossed your mind? 328 00:23:40,169 --> 00:23:42,581 Just when you think you've collared your dream girl... 329 00:23:42,755 --> 00:23:46,168 ...her incontinent, alcoholic father appears, wrecks everything... 330 00:23:46,342 --> 00:23:47,548 ...and she's blaming you? 331 00:23:47,718 --> 00:23:51,802 Your dream girl? We had drunken sex on my kitchen floor. 332 00:23:51,972 --> 00:23:55,089 Quit pretending you don't even know me. You weren't that drunk. 333 00:23:56,226 --> 00:23:59,434 -Hey, it's Phillip. -Hey, it's dead man walking. 334 00:23:59,605 --> 00:24:01,345 Jimmy Clifton called today looking for you. 335 00:24:01,523 --> 00:24:03,935 STEVE: No school? -Nah, I got some teeth pulled today. 336 00:24:04,109 --> 00:24:05,690 -Wisdom teeth? -Sugar rot. 337 00:24:05,861 --> 00:24:09,024 Ah. Little-known fact: Don't just chew your food on one side. 338 00:24:09,198 --> 00:24:12,361 It can buckle yourjaw which will buckle your hips and affect your posture. 339 00:24:12,534 --> 00:24:13,694 -That's a fact? -Skeletal fact. 340 00:24:13,869 --> 00:24:15,234 LIP’ 341 00:24:15,412 --> 00:24:16,492 [MOUTHS] Fuck off. 342 00:24:16,705 --> 00:24:19,868 Hey, talk out of your ass with that much conviction... 343 00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:25,378 ...you end up needing a much bigger toothbrush. That's an anal fact. 344 00:24:28,801 --> 00:24:30,041 [DRYER RA'I'|'L|NG] 345 00:24:30,219 --> 00:24:34,758 Listen, thank you for trying to get my purse back and stuff. 346 00:24:35,265 --> 00:24:37,551 -Stuff? -I'm not looking. 347 00:24:37,977 --> 00:24:40,218 Not right now. 348 00:24:43,065 --> 00:24:47,434 Okay. Is it all right if! leave my number for when you might be? 349 00:24:50,739 --> 00:24:51,728 LIP: Relax, okay? IAN: No. 350 00:24:51,907 --> 00:24:55,149 -No, no, no. You're gonna like it. -What am I even gonna say? 351 00:24:55,327 --> 00:24:57,739 You just gotta keep talking about science. 352 00:24:57,913 --> 00:24:59,653 I don't know anything about science. 353 00:24:59,832 --> 00:25:02,790 Okay, so just read from the table of elements. 354 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,747 Cerium, erbium, praseodymium. 355 00:25:12,386 --> 00:25:14,377 -Mrs. Jackson. -Ohh! 356 00:25:14,555 --> 00:25:19,891 Karen is thrilled with you. She got an A on her physics midterm. 357 00:25:20,060 --> 00:25:23,803 Karen. Honey, your little helper is here. 358 00:25:23,981 --> 00:25:26,188 -This is my brother, Ian. -Um.... 359 00:25:26,525 --> 00:25:29,733 I'm out of plastic bags. Why don't you leave your shoes out here... 360 00:25:29,903 --> 00:25:32,110 -...where they can breathe? -Sure. 361 00:25:35,409 --> 00:25:40,529 IAN: Erbium, cerium, praseodymium, magnesium-- 362 00:25:40,706 --> 00:25:44,745 You kids want some homemade lime chicken chimichangas? 363 00:25:44,918 --> 00:25:47,580 -No, thanks, Sheila. I think we're fine. -No? All right. 364 00:25:48,297 --> 00:25:52,791 Praseodymium, uh, magnesium, suIfur-- 365 00:25:52,968 --> 00:25:55,801 EDDIE: All right. I'm off to work. 366 00:25:56,472 --> 00:25:58,178 Oh, hey, fellas. 367 00:25:58,348 --> 00:26:00,009 Where's Karen? 368 00:26:00,184 --> 00:26:01,219 Her room, I think. 369 00:26:01,393 --> 00:26:05,056 Google Earth for a GPS reference on where Isaac Newton was born. 370 00:26:06,440 --> 00:26:09,182 SHEILA: Guess what I made for your lunch. 371 00:26:09,443 --> 00:26:12,901 -Cornish game hen with Asian pear? -No. 372 00:26:13,072 --> 00:26:17,441 -Wild salmon with baby carrots? -No. 373 00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:20,617 Kiss and I'll tell. 374 00:26:21,497 --> 00:26:24,489 I'll find out what I got when I open the damn box, all right? 375 00:26:41,975 --> 00:26:45,843 I'm late, Karen, honey. I guess I'll see you in the morning. 376 00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:51,769 What's she hiding for? 377 00:26:54,279 --> 00:26:56,565 What are you hiding for? 378 00:26:58,867 --> 00:27:00,107 Oh, sweet Jesus. 379 00:27:06,917 --> 00:27:08,873 No! 380 00:27:24,393 --> 00:27:27,135 It's just a study group. 381 00:27:27,312 --> 00:27:29,894 Oh, honey. 382 00:27:30,399 --> 00:27:31,514 He caught Lip. 383 00:27:36,155 --> 00:27:39,488 The further you run, the more I will kill you! 384 00:27:52,254 --> 00:27:54,040 Really? An old lady on the train? 385 00:27:54,214 --> 00:27:56,580 Oh, yeah, the doors were closing on her walker. 386 00:27:56,758 --> 00:27:58,498 Lip barely got his foot in in time to stop-- 387 00:27:58,677 --> 00:28:00,167 Owl Jesus, Fiona. 388 00:28:00,345 --> 00:28:02,677 I can't remember whether that's good or bad. 389 00:28:02,848 --> 00:28:05,635 More likely you jumped the turnstiles and he twisted it... 390 00:28:05,809 --> 00:28:09,222 -...trying to outrun the transit cops. -No. Always elevate extremities. 391 00:28:09,438 --> 00:28:11,474 Move before you give him a fucking embolism. 392 00:28:11,648 --> 00:28:13,639 -You okay, Lip? -Please, don't touch it. 393 00:28:13,817 --> 00:28:16,024 Okay. Wiggle your toes. 394 00:28:16,195 --> 00:28:17,230 [LIP GRUNTS] 395 00:28:17,404 --> 00:28:19,645 Go to my house, top of the freezer. Two ice packs. 396 00:28:19,823 --> 00:28:23,691 Second cupboard above the sink, liquid ibuprofen, freeze spray, Ace bandages. 397 00:28:23,869 --> 00:28:25,075 Should we get it x-rayed? 398 00:28:25,245 --> 00:28:28,578 No, you'll be in the ER forever. For what? "Sub-metatarsal hematoma." 399 00:28:28,749 --> 00:28:31,286 Tell us something we didn't know five hours ago. 400 00:28:31,460 --> 00:28:33,121 -My bedroom, top of the TV. -Yeah? 401 00:28:33,295 --> 00:28:35,456 Pack of smokes and the lighter. Okay. 402 00:28:35,631 --> 00:28:36,791 [KNOCKS ON DOOR] 403 00:28:36,965 --> 00:28:41,584 LIP: Shit. I'm not here. I'm not here. IAN: You don't know us. Fiona. 404 00:28:41,762 --> 00:28:46,005 Oh, what have you done? What have you done? 405 00:28:54,733 --> 00:28:57,600 Can I get it through here or is it better around the back? 406 00:28:58,028 --> 00:28:59,188 Samsung washer. 407 00:29:00,113 --> 00:29:01,899 It's not me. 408 00:29:02,074 --> 00:29:05,441 -Gallagher, number 2119? -Yeah, but that's not ours. 409 00:29:05,619 --> 00:29:08,577 Well, it's paid for. You want me to hook it up or not? 410 00:29:24,596 --> 00:29:26,427 KEVIN: Where you going with those? 411 00:29:28,183 --> 00:29:31,516 -Veronica wants them. -Well, give me one. 412 00:29:56,670 --> 00:29:57,876 [ALARM PLAYS] 413 00:29:58,046 --> 00:30:00,537 Oh, oh Everybody say oh, oh 414 00:30:04,386 --> 00:30:10,427 Got it? Okay. Ice and Advil. And keep your weight off of it. 415 00:30:11,351 --> 00:30:15,060 -I thought you were broke. -That's what I said. 416 00:30:15,439 --> 00:30:16,975 These were in the washer. 417 00:30:19,109 --> 00:30:22,101 -"Steve"? No. -Yeah. Uh-huh. 418 00:30:22,279 --> 00:30:25,112 -Who's Steve? -The other night. 419 00:30:25,282 --> 00:30:28,194 -No. -I know. 420 00:30:32,789 --> 00:30:37,283 Fifteen years. Fifteen years. I've done everything in my control. 421 00:30:37,461 --> 00:30:41,295 What did I say? What did I tell you? Sow and thou shall reap. 422 00:30:41,465 --> 00:30:43,922 She didn't reap this from me, I'll tell you that. 423 00:30:44,092 --> 00:30:47,255 Reap what? What are you reaping now? 424 00:30:47,429 --> 00:30:52,594 Eddie, Eddie, Eddie. Whatever it is, I'll try. I'll really try. 425 00:30:52,768 --> 00:30:57,478 Mom, don't beg him. If he can do this, then the bastard's not worth it! 426 00:30:57,647 --> 00:31:00,309 Hey, you honor thy father. 427 00:31:00,484 --> 00:31:01,769 Get fucked! 428 00:31:01,943 --> 00:31:04,855 Don't try blaming me for this. 429 00:31:05,405 --> 00:31:07,817 You're your own worst enemy, you two. 430 00:31:07,991 --> 00:31:13,361 They say bad things happen in three. They don't. Twos. You two. 431 00:31:14,623 --> 00:31:16,955 Insane. 432 00:31:27,052 --> 00:31:29,134 STEVE [OVER PHONE]: Hello? -How much you pay for it? 433 00:31:29,304 --> 00:31:31,465 I'm not telling you that. It's a gift. 434 00:31:31,640 --> 00:31:34,473 So you'd remember the phone number, which obviously worked. 435 00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:36,850 Your washer's in the yard. We don't need it. 436 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:39,602 So you gotta come pick it up before it starts rusting. 437 00:31:39,773 --> 00:31:40,808 Oh, is it? 438 00:31:42,275 --> 00:31:43,685 No. 439 00:31:43,860 --> 00:31:45,020 Did the guy connect it? 440 00:31:46,822 --> 00:31:48,358 Yes. 441 00:31:48,532 --> 00:31:50,989 -it's working okay? -It's not my favorite color. 442 00:31:51,493 --> 00:31:53,484 Oh, so you've tried it. 443 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:10,842 Let me smell your breath. 444 00:32:12,347 --> 00:32:13,382 -Pork rinds? -No. 445 00:32:13,974 --> 00:32:15,214 -Those are mine. -See? 446 00:32:15,392 --> 00:32:17,553 And since when do pork rinds come from a pig? 447 00:32:17,727 --> 00:32:20,844 Ian, I sign your check. What's bad for him is really bad for you. 448 00:32:21,022 --> 00:32:22,808 If you start lying for him»- 449 00:32:22,983 --> 00:32:25,975 They're just corn chips with fake hair. Fake corn, even. 450 00:32:26,194 --> 00:32:29,152 Get yourself to that mosque so your dad stops blaming me... 451 00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:32,485 ...for the fact that we're going to hell, and talk to your mother. 452 00:32:32,701 --> 00:32:35,408 She won't talk to me. I can't force her to take her meds. 453 00:32:35,579 --> 00:32:38,195 I don't want the cops dragging me out of bed at 4 a.m... 454 00:32:38,373 --> 00:32:41,285 ...because she's yelling that the CIA is stealing her trash. 455 00:32:41,460 --> 00:32:42,916 But that happened, didn't it? 456 00:32:44,337 --> 00:32:46,328 Once, four years ago, yes. 457 00:32:46,506 --> 00:32:50,090 But now she's locked in the basement making a helmet out of tinfoil. 458 00:32:50,260 --> 00:32:53,923 Enough's enough. Boys, let's go. Get in the car. I have to take the boys... 459 00:32:54,097 --> 00:32:57,305 ...to Cub Scouts at the mosque before all the carpets are taken. 460 00:32:57,476 --> 00:32:59,967 She's your mother, get her to take her Thorazine. 461 00:33:00,145 --> 00:33:03,558 No. Boys, no candy. Come on, let's go. We're gonna be late. Go, go, go. 462 00:33:03,732 --> 00:33:04,767 No more. 463 00:33:06,234 --> 00:33:08,475 Come. We're gonna be late. Hurry up. 464 00:33:36,723 --> 00:33:39,590 [FRANK SNORING] 465 00:33:41,937 --> 00:33:47,022 Just tell me you didn't go and get some girl pregnant. 466 00:33:47,484 --> 00:33:49,440 No worries. 467 00:33:50,779 --> 00:33:52,610 He hates me. 468 00:33:53,365 --> 00:33:56,528 You just look more like Mom than any of the rest of us. 469 00:33:56,701 --> 00:33:57,816 You probably scare him. 470 00:33:58,453 --> 00:34:00,239 -Oh, yeah? -Yeah. 471 00:34:00,413 --> 00:34:01,653 He ain't seen nothing yet. 472 00:34:03,917 --> 00:34:06,875 -He give you money for the field trip? -l'll pay my own way. 473 00:34:08,338 --> 00:34:10,294 No, you won't. 474 00:34:19,558 --> 00:34:21,048 [IAN CHUCKLES] 475 00:34:25,981 --> 00:34:29,098 You must get sick of having to think for everybody. 476 00:34:29,359 --> 00:34:32,851 At least I can. Proves I'm wanted. 477 00:34:34,531 --> 00:34:36,317 Jesus, Fiona. 478 00:34:36,491 --> 00:34:40,825 If all you want is to be needed, then congratulations. 479 00:34:40,996 --> 00:34:44,659 You got yourself a job for life with this joker. 480 00:35:09,399 --> 00:35:12,482 Hey, get up. 481 00:35:14,070 --> 00:35:16,857 Dad, gel UP> 482 00:35:17,073 --> 00:35:18,984 Get up! 483 00:35:38,511 --> 00:35:40,923 "Good job, Fiona. 484 00:35:41,181 --> 00:35:44,014 I don't know how I could do this without you. 485 00:35:44,184 --> 00:35:46,891 Thanks for all your hard work." 486 00:35:50,190 --> 00:35:52,397 You're welcome, Dad. 487 00:35:54,903 --> 00:35:55,983 My pleasure. 488 00:35:59,157 --> 00:36:00,488 [FIONA srer-rs] 489 00:36:34,275 --> 00:36:36,561 Good night, Daddy. 490 00:36:47,622 --> 00:36:49,908 [LINE RINGING] 491 00:36:50,083 --> 00:36:51,198 STEVE: Hello ? 492 00:36:51,376 --> 00:36:53,492 If that wasn't bullshit, what was I wearing? 493 00:36:53,670 --> 00:36:55,752 First time you saw me, if that wasn't a lie. 494 00:36:57,215 --> 00:37:01,504 Black top with gold trim, black shiny jeans... 495 00:37:01,678 --> 00:37:04,385 ...thin shoes, straps. 496 00:37:05,640 --> 00:37:07,471 Sandals. 497 00:37:07,642 --> 00:37:09,883 With your hair pinned high. 498 00:37:11,604 --> 00:37:14,186 Dangly gold earrings that made me smile. 499 00:37:17,986 --> 00:37:20,819 A big watch, too big... 500 00:37:20,989 --> 00:37:23,355 ...so it slid up your arm, but it looked great. 501 00:37:23,825 --> 00:37:29,991 And you were dancing next to a red-haired girl in a green dress. 502 00:37:36,671 --> 00:37:39,754 Yeah, yeah, yeah, Jenna. It was Jenna's birthday. 503 00:37:39,924 --> 00:37:43,758 So you were watching her, who's a lot better looking than me. 504 00:37:44,387 --> 00:37:48,096 -You think so? Really? -How come you're not stalking Jenna? 505 00:37:48,266 --> 00:37:51,099 Because you think like that and Jenna doesn't. 506 00:37:51,269 --> 00:37:52,679 Jenna dances for an audience. 507 00:37:52,854 --> 00:37:55,846 You dance like there's no one else in the room. 508 00:37:57,776 --> 00:37:59,312 Your life's not simple, Fiona... 509 00:37:59,527 --> 00:38:02,439 ...and you can't stop it from showing because you're no fake. 510 00:38:02,614 --> 00:38:05,026 You're not lost. You don't need finding. 511 00:38:05,533 --> 00:38:08,149 This whole city belongs to the Jennas, I'm sick of them. 512 00:38:08,620 --> 00:38:11,703 Iswear, Fiona, you're nothing like anyone I've ever met. 513 00:38:11,873 --> 00:38:16,037 You make me want to enjoy my life again. 514 00:38:17,086 --> 00:38:19,042 Are you there? 515 00:38:21,549 --> 00:38:23,540 Fiona? 516 00:39:44,132 --> 00:39:46,214 STEVE: Whoa, whoa, whoa, wait. 517 00:39:46,509 --> 00:39:48,841 What have I ever done to anybody, never mind you... 518 00:39:49,012 --> 00:39:51,298 ...that made me look unreliable? Unreliable? 519 00:39:51,472 --> 00:39:53,804 People like you are used to getting your own way. 520 00:39:53,975 --> 00:39:56,466 And by "people like me" you mean people like what? 521 00:39:59,355 --> 00:40:04,019 Okay, wait. All right. Yes, no. All you gotta do is agree or disagree. 522 00:40:04,736 --> 00:40:06,818 "He thinks the sun shines out of his own ass." 523 00:40:07,488 --> 00:40:09,274 -Agree or disagree? -Agree. 524 00:40:09,991 --> 00:40:11,947 "He's overly generous and that bugs me." 525 00:40:13,870 --> 00:40:15,906 -Agree. -"Because I'm not used to get--" 526 00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:17,115 Actually, very agree. 527 00:40:17,290 --> 00:40:20,498 "Because I'm not used to getting spoiled." 528 00:40:20,668 --> 00:40:25,128 "Okay, so I lose respect for guys like Steve, because people unlike Steve... 529 00:40:25,298 --> 00:40:28,961 ...or people diametrically opposite to Steve have always let me down. 530 00:40:29,594 --> 00:40:32,586 So deciding he's overeducated and has more money than sense... 531 00:40:32,764 --> 00:40:35,676 ...is somehow more socially acceptable than asking myself, for instance: 532 00:40:35,850 --> 00:40:38,762 'Why do the men I always date treat me like shit?"' 533 00:40:40,855 --> 00:40:42,720 -Fuck you. -It's a question. 534 00:40:42,899 --> 00:40:44,639 Fuck you. 535 00:40:44,817 --> 00:40:46,808 Either-or. 536 00:40:49,864 --> 00:40:51,855 -Agree. -"He's had an easy life." 537 00:40:52,033 --> 00:40:53,614 -Definitely. -You prefer a guy... 538 00:40:53,785 --> 00:40:56,026 -...who's been around the block. -What if I do? 539 00:40:56,204 --> 00:40:59,241 Say, D-BIock of a maximum-security prison? 540 00:40:59,415 --> 00:41:02,873 -If he knew how to have fun, sure. -Fiona, I can't help my upbringing. 541 00:41:03,044 --> 00:41:05,205 How come it's me having to apologize for mine? 542 00:41:05,380 --> 00:41:06,870 Who's asking you to? 543 00:41:07,465 --> 00:41:09,751 We finished here, guys? 544 00:41:09,926 --> 00:41:11,382 We're working on it. 545 00:41:13,513 --> 00:41:16,596 You wanna wait outside while I pay the bill? 546 00:41:17,642 --> 00:41:18,722 Sure. 547 00:41:23,022 --> 00:41:24,512 -He's on break? -Any second now. 548 00:41:24,732 --> 00:41:26,268 All right. 549 00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:50,956 STEVE: Good evening, sir. -Thanks. 550 00:42:02,311 --> 00:42:04,017 [CELL PHONE RINGING] 551 00:42:09,277 --> 00:42:11,393 STEVE [OVER PHONE]: I don't buy and sell cars. 552 00:42:11,571 --> 00:42:15,814 I just sell them. But the cars I sell are mainly not mine. 553 00:42:20,788 --> 00:42:22,278 Still looking for fun, Fiona? 554 00:42:22,457 --> 00:42:24,243 [ENGINE REVS] 555 00:42:29,297 --> 00:42:30,958 FIONA: Go. 556 00:42:40,475 --> 00:42:41,840 [HORN HONKS] 557 00:42:58,201 --> 00:43:03,116 Mom, we have to wear our shoes. There's bits of glass on the floor. 558 00:43:05,166 --> 00:43:08,954 -Maybe Lip could use a drink. -Oh, yes. 559 00:43:09,128 --> 00:43:10,413 -Sorry, Lip. LIP: It's okay. 560 00:43:10,588 --> 00:43:13,671 I'm a bit off today, aren't I, Karen? 561 00:43:13,841 --> 00:43:18,676 So vodka? I could do Sloe Comfortable Screws. 562 00:43:18,846 --> 00:43:23,135 Plenty of tequila. I think I'm out of lime. Definitely Gin Fizz. 563 00:43:23,351 --> 00:43:25,512 -Just a couple of Cokes, Mom. -And some beers? 564 00:43:25,686 --> 00:43:27,347 Beer is great, Sheila. Thanks. 565 00:43:35,279 --> 00:43:37,941 So, what if your dad comes back and sees me here? 566 00:43:38,116 --> 00:43:39,731 He won't. 567 00:43:39,909 --> 00:43:41,365 It's my fault? 568 00:43:41,536 --> 00:43:44,744 He's been looking for an excuse for months. 569 00:43:46,207 --> 00:43:48,289 What impression did you get from my brother? 570 00:43:48,459 --> 00:43:49,790 -Ian? -Yeah. 571 00:43:49,961 --> 00:43:51,201 Seems nice. 572 00:43:51,379 --> 00:43:54,496 Right, but did he pitch a tent? 573 00:43:55,091 --> 00:43:57,298 -Huh? -Did you make him hard? 574 00:43:59,679 --> 00:44:01,886 Ever try to play pool with a rope? 575 00:44:47,935 --> 00:44:50,096 Yo, Kash. 576 00:44:55,902 --> 00:44:58,814 [GRUNTING AND GROANING] 577 00:45:00,489 --> 00:45:02,696 LIP: Yo, Kash. 578 00:45:08,497 --> 00:45:11,864 KASH: All right, you stack the butter. I'll do the snacks. 579 00:45:15,046 --> 00:45:16,752 Oh, Jesus Christ, Lip. 580 00:45:16,964 --> 00:45:20,081 Yeah, sorry. Sorry, Kash. ljust.... 581 00:45:20,259 --> 00:45:23,751 -Thanks for the tools. -Anytime, as long as I get them back. 582 00:45:23,971 --> 00:45:25,632 Right. 583 00:45:32,396 --> 00:45:34,603 You must be joking. 584 00:45:36,692 --> 00:45:38,853 What, you're fucking him? 585 00:45:41,656 --> 00:45:43,692 Fuck. 586 00:46:09,308 --> 00:46:13,642 He bought them for you, didn't he? Those shoes. 587 00:46:14,313 --> 00:46:16,679 He's married. 588 00:46:17,191 --> 00:46:19,523 With kids. What else did he buy you, Ian? 589 00:46:20,194 --> 00:46:22,105 Stuff. 590 00:46:22,571 --> 00:46:24,061 Now and again. 591 00:46:25,032 --> 00:46:26,988 And you're happy with that? 592 00:46:27,159 --> 00:46:29,650 What's that make you, huh? 593 00:46:29,829 --> 00:46:32,036 -Fucking kept boy, at best. -Hey. 594 00:46:37,169 --> 00:46:40,707 Listen to me, stupid. You think you know everything, but you know shit. 595 00:46:40,881 --> 00:46:43,497 Ask me what I got him, huh? Ask me. 596 00:46:43,676 --> 00:46:45,758 CDs. dozens of CDs. 597 00:46:47,388 --> 00:46:49,720 Stuff he's never heard of, stuff he might like... 598 00:46:49,890 --> 00:46:52,051 ...because I want him to like the things I do. 599 00:46:52,226 --> 00:46:55,559 And Sox tickets for his birthday. So, what does that make you, Lip? 600 00:46:55,980 --> 00:46:58,392 It makes you wrong, you fucking smart asshole. 601 00:46:59,191 --> 00:47:02,729 Now, go back to Kash and promise him that you're not gonna tell anybody... 602 00:47:02,903 --> 00:47:06,566 ...because he's done nothing to be sorry for. Nothing. 603 00:47:18,419 --> 00:47:20,455 Fake Muslim... 604 00:47:20,963 --> 00:47:24,000 ...cheats on white fundamentalist wife with gutless gay boy. 605 00:47:26,385 --> 00:47:30,128 Says more about White Sox fans than it does for the rest of us. 606 00:47:40,232 --> 00:47:42,894 I think they're all asleep. 607 00:47:45,363 --> 00:47:46,694 Gotcha. 608 00:47:46,864 --> 00:47:48,195 [FIONA CHUCKLES] 609 00:47:49,325 --> 00:47:53,989 -Who's been eating my porridge? -Hey, Dad. This is Steve. 610 00:47:54,163 --> 00:47:57,701 Oh, no, no, no. We met before, but you weren't exactly-- 611 00:48:02,797 --> 00:48:05,038 How much do you weigh? 612 00:48:05,216 --> 00:48:07,127 I don't know. 613 00:48:07,385 --> 00:48:09,626 That would fit me. 614 00:48:09,887 --> 00:48:13,300 You can just ignore him. And you, move. 615 00:48:21,357 --> 00:48:23,894 You know what? I'd better let you get to bed. 616 00:48:24,068 --> 00:48:26,434 Um, but thanks. It was nice. 617 00:48:26,654 --> 00:48:27,985 -Yeah. -Nice, right? 618 00:48:28,155 --> 00:48:29,691 [FRANK CHUCKLES] 619 00:48:30,491 --> 00:48:32,982 No. No. 620 00:48:38,916 --> 00:48:41,202 Who paid for this? 621 00:48:42,128 --> 00:48:43,538 Hm? 622 00:48:45,506 --> 00:48:47,292 STEVE: What? 623 00:48:47,466 --> 00:48:48,672 What the hell's he on? 624 00:48:49,176 --> 00:48:52,168 Uh, he thinks he bought ecstasy... 625 00:48:52,346 --> 00:48:56,259 ...but the only dealer he gets credit from is a schizophrenic. 626 00:48:57,560 --> 00:49:01,644 It's not a case of whether or not I agree, it's a fact. If I were a single parent-- 627 00:49:01,814 --> 00:49:03,145 Aren't you a single parent? 628 00:49:03,315 --> 00:49:05,977 -"Yeah, but if! had tits...." -Yeah, but if I had tits... 629 00:49:06,193 --> 00:49:10,106 ...they would double the money. If you're a guy, they don't wanna fucking hear it. 630 00:49:10,281 --> 00:49:13,023 No, I get it. It's, "Prove you're looking for work--" 631 00:49:13,200 --> 00:49:15,031 -He's on disability. -Yeah? For what? 632 00:49:15,202 --> 00:49:17,534 A tragedy, really. I gave my life to that company. 633 00:49:17,705 --> 00:49:20,037 FIONA: You worked there a week. STEVE: What happened? 634 00:49:20,207 --> 00:49:23,290 Slaughterhouse, poultry. Dangerous work. 635 00:49:23,461 --> 00:49:26,168 Doing my job, unsuspecting, when out of nowhere... 636 00:49:26,338 --> 00:49:30,081 ...I am slammed in the ribs by a headless flying chicken. 637 00:49:30,718 --> 00:49:32,879 I was lucky, it almost missed me. 638 00:49:33,053 --> 00:49:35,920 And what do I get for my pain and suffering? 639 00:49:36,098 --> 00:49:41,718 Followed around by a video camera. Where's the trust, Steve? 640 00:49:41,896 --> 00:49:45,809 The sacred bond between employer and employee. 641 00:49:45,983 --> 00:49:47,644 Gone, Steve. It's gone. 642 00:49:47,818 --> 00:49:50,059 How's a guy supposed to work, hurt, with kids? 643 00:49:50,237 --> 00:49:53,195 -Hello. Thank you. Exactly. -Yeah. 644 00:49:53,365 --> 00:49:56,072 Excellent. Excellent. And her mother... 645 00:49:56,243 --> 00:49:58,154 -...God rest her soul. -Dad, stop it. 646 00:49:58,329 --> 00:50:00,490 -She better be dead, that bitch. FIONA: Cut it out! 647 00:50:00,664 --> 00:50:06,785 Four-month-old baby, 14-year-old girl just had her appendix out... 648 00:50:06,962 --> 00:50:09,874 ...11-year-o|d Lip, 10-year-old Ian... 649 00:50:10,049 --> 00:50:14,543 ...a 7-year-old, a 5-year-old, and-- Ohh! 650 00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:18,804 And a Dodge Astro van. 651 00:50:18,974 --> 00:50:21,386 -No. -Calypso-- Yes, calypso blue. 652 00:50:21,560 --> 00:50:25,599 What's the one thing that we needed? One word. One thing. 653 00:50:25,773 --> 00:50:27,604 -Sterilization? -Continuity. 654 00:50:27,775 --> 00:50:31,893 -Continuity. -Continuity. 655 00:50:33,030 --> 00:50:35,442 l-- I-- What could I--? 656 00:50:35,616 --> 00:50:37,322 [CREAM'S "WHITE ROOM" PLAYS OVER RADIO] 657 00:50:37,618 --> 00:50:39,404 Oh, my God, I love this part. 658 00:50:39,578 --> 00:50:42,320 [FRANK HUMS] 659 00:50:46,210 --> 00:50:49,168 "You said no strings could--" 660 00:50:49,338 --> 00:50:52,205 l-- I-- What could I do, Steve? 661 00:50:52,383 --> 00:50:54,214 .|.. |.. -Disappear for three weeks? 662 00:50:54,385 --> 00:50:57,172 -I had a breakdown. -You went on a bender. 663 00:50:57,346 --> 00:51:00,213 Fuck off. Nervous breakdown. 664 00:51:00,391 --> 00:51:02,803 [KNOCKING ON DOOR] 665 00:51:04,186 --> 00:51:05,767 Dad. Come on, keys. 666 00:51:05,938 --> 00:51:09,897 If this is-- Okay. This is-- Sorry. 667 00:51:11,569 --> 00:51:13,400 I like him. 668 00:51:13,612 --> 00:51:16,775 -You got any idea what time it is? -Sorry, it's Frank. He's-- 669 00:51:16,949 --> 00:51:18,610 VERONICA: Yo. 670 00:51:19,326 --> 00:51:22,693 KEVIN: Frank, what did I tell you? -Here we go. Neighbors of Satan. 671 00:51:22,871 --> 00:51:25,362 The day you start paying rent like the rest of us... 672 00:51:25,541 --> 00:51:29,705 ...you can play whatever you want, but if you're gonna bump this time of night... 673 00:51:29,878 --> 00:51:32,460 ...you're gonna pump out the stuff that we like. Okay? 674 00:51:32,631 --> 00:51:33,871 [LMFAO'S "SHOTS" PLAYING] 675 00:51:34,049 --> 00:51:35,084 --ladies and gentlemen 676 00:51:35,259 --> 00:51:36,749 FIONA: Ohh! 677 00:51:36,927 --> 00:51:38,463 [FRANK HUMMING] 678 00:51:38,637 --> 00:51:41,253 [FIONA AND VERONICA GRUNTING] 679 00:51:42,850 --> 00:51:45,762 [LAUGHING] 680 00:51:47,438 --> 00:51:50,100 VERONICA: Baby. FRANK: What? What? What? 681 00:51:50,274 --> 00:51:52,265 VERONICA: Uh, uh, uh! 682 00:51:54,361 --> 00:51:56,602 STEVE: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 683 00:51:57,489 --> 00:51:59,400 That's it. 684 00:52:00,492 --> 00:52:02,904 Oh! Oh! 685 00:52:04,371 --> 00:52:05,451 Watch it. 686 00:52:05,998 --> 00:52:09,866 FRANK: Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! 687 00:52:15,049 --> 00:52:17,665 Your dad made me follow you up. 688 00:52:18,677 --> 00:52:20,258 Gave me a condom. 689 00:52:20,429 --> 00:52:22,169 He must really like you. 690 00:52:22,389 --> 00:52:25,176 He usuallyjust gives my boyfriends a dental dam. 691 00:52:25,351 --> 00:52:27,558 [LIAM WARBLING] 692 00:52:29,897 --> 00:52:32,434 Liam's in here somewhere. 693 00:52:33,942 --> 00:52:35,978 Don't the kids wake up? 694 00:52:36,153 --> 00:52:37,984 Would you? 695 00:53:00,260 --> 00:53:02,467 Hey, Carl, you seen Ian? 696 00:53:02,805 --> 00:53:05,137 Gone when I woke up. 697 00:53:25,619 --> 00:53:27,951 [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING ON EAR BUDS] 698 00:53:38,966 --> 00:53:42,754 How can that be good for you? Or-? Or that? 699 00:53:42,970 --> 00:53:46,133 -How can that be good for you? -You know what's not funny? 700 00:53:46,598 --> 00:53:49,635 You. Ever. 701 00:53:58,902 --> 00:54:01,359 Anybody before Kash? 702 00:54:03,532 --> 00:54:04,772 One. 703 00:54:04,992 --> 00:54:08,484 -Yeah? Who? -I'm not telling you, all right? 704 00:54:09,413 --> 00:54:12,746 All right, name a single time I've let you down. 705 00:54:17,212 --> 00:54:20,204 -It was a kid at school. -Yeah? 706 00:54:20,382 --> 00:54:22,543 All right, I guess it doesn't really matter... 707 00:54:22,718 --> 00:54:26,006 ...because, I mean, he's long gone now anyways, but.... 708 00:54:26,513 --> 00:54:27,923 Roger Spike)’- 709 00:54:29,099 --> 00:54:31,135 Roger Spikey? 710 00:54:31,393 --> 00:54:36,057 Fucking donkey-dick Roger Spikey? The original beef-meister? 711 00:54:36,231 --> 00:54:38,438 Did he start that rumor? 712 00:54:39,151 --> 00:54:40,857 Not a rumor. 713 00:54:41,028 --> 00:54:44,441 Well, that was a bit gay. What you just did there with your eyebrows... 714 00:54:44,615 --> 00:54:47,732 -...you wanna watch that. -All right, fuck off, all right? 715 00:54:49,661 --> 00:54:51,902 But seriously, like.... 716 00:54:52,539 --> 00:54:54,951 Like, up the ass? 717 00:54:55,417 --> 00:54:59,160 Do you get used to that? Can someone get used to that? I mean-- 718 00:54:59,338 --> 00:55:04,583 I mean, the whole point of the digestive system is one-way traffic. 719 00:55:07,095 --> 00:55:09,131 It just is. 720 00:55:09,598 --> 00:55:12,055 [LAUGHS] 721 00:55:14,353 --> 00:55:15,968 What? What? 722 00:55:16,980 --> 00:55:21,815 "Just is." Like we're only given our lungs to tricking smoke, right? 723 00:55:21,985 --> 00:55:24,192 [BOTH LAUGHING] 724 00:55:34,998 --> 00:55:37,489 STEVE: That's hot. -Don't drop it. Please, don't drop it. 725 00:55:37,668 --> 00:55:40,751 Please, don't drop it! Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 726 00:55:40,921 --> 00:55:44,129 -That sausage is great, huh? DEBBIE: Haven't had eggs in a while. 727 00:55:44,299 --> 00:55:45,880 STEVE: Somebody wanna get the pancakes? 728 00:55:46,051 --> 00:55:49,839 -What's all this? -Debbie wakes up earlier than I do. 729 00:55:50,013 --> 00:55:53,096 I told her I never eat breakfast but she said it's her favorite. 730 00:55:53,267 --> 00:55:55,223 -Pancakes. -And since it's her birthday-- 731 00:55:55,394 --> 00:55:57,476 FIONA: No, it's not. CARL: It's not her birthday. 732 00:55:57,646 --> 00:56:01,559 -I never said it was, I said I wished it was. -Right, she said she wished it was. 733 00:56:01,733 --> 00:56:05,396 Sorry, Deb, I totally misheard that. Perforated eardrum on the right. 734 00:56:09,157 --> 00:56:10,943 Fifteen minutes before school, tops. 735 00:56:11,118 --> 00:56:13,780 LIP: Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Ian, Lip, dishes soon as you're done. 736 00:56:13,954 --> 00:56:15,069 -Debbie, Carl-- DEBBIE: Yeah. 737 00:56:15,247 --> 00:56:18,034 You're not-- You forgot to take the trash out. 738 00:56:18,208 --> 00:56:20,290 [ALL CHATTERING] 739 00:56:21,253 --> 00:56:23,710 DEBBIE: Hey, it's my birthday. 740 00:57:23,690 --> 00:57:25,681 [English - US - SDH]