1
00:00:01,469 --> 00:00:04,814
Hey, Earl, do you ever worry that
you're going to forget how to walk ?
2
00:00:04,940 --> 00:00:06,647
No, I can't say that I do.
3
00:00:07,243 --> 00:00:10,480
'Cause when we were eating in there,
I started to worry that when we got up
4
00:00:10,606 --> 00:00:12,307
my legs wouldn't know what to do.
5
00:00:12,771 --> 00:00:14,083
They seem to be doing all right.
6
00:00:14,209 --> 00:00:14,959
Yeah, for now,
7
00:00:15,085 --> 00:00:18,080
but every time I sit down,
it's like starting all over again.
8
00:00:20,042 --> 00:00:21,326
We can't go that way.
9
00:00:21,452 --> 00:00:23,930
We can't walk across
that black cat's path.
10
00:00:25,296 --> 00:00:26,812
Fine, we'll go the long way.
11
00:00:30,242 --> 00:00:31,976
He circled us.
I think we're stuck.
12
00:00:32,091 --> 00:00:35,073
Randy, I'm not gonna stand here forever
just 'cause you're superstitious.
13
00:00:35,190 --> 00:00:38,796
Why ? Every day of my life revolves
around you believing in karma.
14
00:00:38,928 --> 00:00:41,303
Plus we always buy
the kind of cereal you like.
15
00:00:43,307 --> 00:00:44,593
How long do we have to wait ?
16
00:00:44,718 --> 00:00:45,453
Three hours.
17
00:00:45,585 --> 00:00:48,061
Or until a white cat
circles us backwards.
18
00:00:56,598 --> 00:00:59,823
I know we must have looked
pretty crazy sitting on that sidewalk,
19
00:00:59,948 --> 00:01:02,272
but Randy insisted we had
to wait three hours
20
00:01:02,398 --> 00:01:04,773
before it was safe to cross
the black cat's path.
21
00:01:04,966 --> 00:01:06,533
Damn thing circled us.
22
00:01:07,637 --> 00:01:09,193
That's it, it's 3:15.
Let's go.
23
00:01:09,318 --> 00:01:10,000
Wait.
24
00:01:11,255 --> 00:01:12,253
Ten seconds.
25
00:01:13,036 --> 00:01:13,763
Eight...
26
00:01:14,147 --> 00:01:15,982
seven... six...
27
00:01:17,777 --> 00:01:20,033
A black cat crosses
your path once,
28
00:01:20,166 --> 00:01:21,112
it's bad luck.
29
00:01:21,236 --> 00:01:23,983
It crosses your path twice,
it's really bad luck.
30
00:01:24,107 --> 00:01:25,353
But three times ?
31
00:01:25,487 --> 00:01:27,770
Well, that's when karma's
trying to tell you something.
32
00:01:28,045 --> 00:01:30,252
And it was telling me to fix #56
33
00:01:30,387 --> 00:01:32,071
"Larceny of a kitty cat."
34
00:01:34,455 --> 00:01:38,242
Every year, Camden had a cat show,
which people who loved cats and
35
00:01:38,375 --> 00:01:41,042
had a lot of time on their hands
took real seriously.
36
00:01:41,277 --> 00:01:43,602
And like with every
competitive sporting event,
37
00:01:43,738 --> 00:01:44,522
there's always a front-runner.
38
00:01:44,655 --> 00:01:46,092
Randy, Randy,
that's him, that's him.
39
00:01:46,217 --> 00:01:47,920
Where ?
I can't see anything.
40
00:01:48,057 --> 00:01:51,270
These cats are making my eyes watery
and my tongue all itchy.
41
00:01:51,395 --> 00:01:53,770
I think I'm allergic to
whatever God makes them out of.
42
00:01:53,907 --> 00:01:56,873
Okay, Sebastian, come on,
it's time for your last-minute floss.
43
00:01:56,998 --> 00:01:58,462
Smile big like Mommy.
44
00:01:58,597 --> 00:02:02,371
And you think of something you like,
like tuna or a really slow mouse.
45
00:02:02,505 --> 00:02:04,721
So who would want me to harm
such a beautiful animal
46
00:02:04,858 --> 00:02:07,851
just so they had a better chance
of winning the first place cash ?
47
00:02:08,965 --> 00:02:10,180
What the hell are
you looking at back there ?
48
00:02:10,315 --> 00:02:12,491
You want to know if her heinie works
I'll just bring you a turd.
49
00:02:13,326 --> 00:02:15,052
Being a big Tonya Harding fan,
50
00:02:15,187 --> 00:02:18,671
Joy wanted me to Nancy Kerrigan
the cat so it couldn't compete.
51
00:02:18,865 --> 00:02:20,761
But I was having trouble
getting it done.
52
00:02:20,885 --> 00:02:22,822
I don't even know
where a damn cat knee is.
53
00:02:22,948 --> 00:02:24,012
My hands are burning.
54
00:02:24,135 --> 00:02:25,021
Ew, it's drooling
55
00:02:25,148 --> 00:02:27,391
and it's humming that weird
I-like-you sound even though I hate it.
56
00:02:27,518 --> 00:02:28,563
I wanted to help Joy, but
57
00:02:28,688 --> 00:02:32,093
Sebastian's eyes must have been prettier
than Nancy Kerrigan's cause
58
00:02:32,225 --> 00:02:33,582
I just couldn't do it.
59
00:02:34,618 --> 00:02:35,962
So, I sneaked him into a place
60
00:02:36,088 --> 00:02:38,472
where he'd be welcome and could pee
wherever he wanted to.
61
00:02:38,598 --> 00:02:40,461
The sleepy cat lady's house.
62
00:02:42,876 --> 00:02:44,503
With Sebastian out of the picture,
63
00:02:44,636 --> 00:02:47,021
Joy thought her cat
might actually have a chance.
64
00:02:47,496 --> 00:02:48,520
Healthy teeth...
65
00:02:48,648 --> 00:02:49,833
nice coat.
66
00:02:51,258 --> 00:02:53,510
Ma'am, is your cat
wearing lipstick ?
67
00:02:53,648 --> 00:02:55,463
Mm-hmm.
Lipsmacker same as mine.
68
00:02:55,586 --> 00:02:57,600
And are these
colored contact lenses ?
69
00:02:57,727 --> 00:03:00,042
Yep. And it was not easy
getting them in there.
70
00:03:00,178 --> 00:03:02,543
He's been jumpy ever since
I waxed his eyebrows.
71
00:03:02,665 --> 00:03:05,481
Charlotte,
we have a Code C over here.
72
00:03:05,617 --> 00:03:07,623
What's going on ?
Am I a winner ?
73
00:03:07,758 --> 00:03:09,500
Not only did Joy's cat not win,
74
00:03:09,626 --> 00:03:11,863
it got rescued
and put into kitty foster care.
75
00:03:11,998 --> 00:03:13,693
Hold on,
I got to give those contacts back
76
00:03:13,826 --> 00:03:16,253
to my neighbor Latisha
before she goes on Date Night.
77
00:03:16,665 --> 00:03:20,280
Since karma wanted me to get Sebastian
back to the girl I stole him from,
78
00:03:20,406 --> 00:03:23,080
well, I went back
to the sleeping cat lady's house.
79
00:03:23,285 --> 00:03:25,582
Everything was exactly
how it was before,
80
00:03:25,715 --> 00:03:28,772
except for the smell.
It was three years worse.
81
00:03:29,695 --> 00:03:33,201
Unfortunately, to a guy like me,
all cats looked the same,
82
00:03:33,325 --> 00:03:35,603
and I couldn't tell
which one was Sebastian.
83
00:03:37,965 --> 00:03:41,402
To be honest, I was kind of hoping after
all these years of not having her cat,
84
00:03:41,535 --> 00:03:42,952
Judy would have moved on.
85
00:03:43,705 --> 00:03:44,773
But she hadn't.
86
00:03:45,108 --> 00:03:48,180
How could you do that
to such an innocent creature ?
87
00:03:48,307 --> 00:03:49,701
It was his idea.
88
00:03:49,877 --> 00:03:51,512
I asked the same thing...
89
00:03:51,678 --> 00:03:52,750
in my mind.
90
00:03:52,926 --> 00:03:54,570
At least this means
he's not lost.
91
00:03:54,706 --> 00:03:55,762
We know where to find him.
92
00:03:55,886 --> 00:03:56,883
That's good, right ?
93
00:03:57,017 --> 00:03:58,173
Yeah, I guess.
94
00:03:58,296 --> 00:03:59,953
You know, I'm trying
not to hate you right now
95
00:04:00,087 --> 00:04:02,432
because hate is not
what Sebastian is about.
96
00:04:03,398 --> 00:04:06,280
We sure are going to get a big tickle
out of this when we see each other.
97
00:04:06,536 --> 00:04:08,580
I like those dents in your face.
98
00:04:10,557 --> 00:04:12,352
- There they are again.
- Quit.
99
00:04:12,697 --> 00:04:16,123
I had a suspicion about
why Randy was acting so peculiar.
100
00:04:16,405 --> 00:04:18,430
But before I could
even think about that,
101
00:04:18,565 --> 00:04:22,633
I had to brace my nostrils for one more
trip into the sleeping cat lady's house.
102
00:04:25,486 --> 00:04:27,183
- Randy, we'll be right out...
- I'm coming in.
103
00:04:27,306 --> 00:04:30,011
Not much will get Randy
into a house full of cats.
104
00:04:30,208 --> 00:04:33,830
And judging by his smile,
I knew he had a crush on Judy.
105
00:04:35,718 --> 00:04:38,820
Sebastian Phillips Dechamps !
106
00:04:38,945 --> 00:04:42,870
Even though he had let himself go,
Judy could still pick out Sebastian,
107
00:04:43,078 --> 00:04:45,252
which was a lot easier
than picking him up.
108
00:04:45,626 --> 00:04:48,810
Well, he certainly has
put on an extra few pounds.
109
00:04:48,945 --> 00:04:50,781
Hmm, fatty-fat-fat-fat.
110
00:04:50,908 --> 00:04:53,550
But Mommy won't be too critical,
'cause critical mommies
111
00:04:53,678 --> 00:04:55,302
make for bulimic teenagers
112
00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:58,593
that become needy adults
that drink a lot of red wine.
113
00:04:58,725 --> 00:04:59,770
I'll help you.
114
00:05:02,495 --> 00:05:05,123
There's only two things
that Randy does that scare me.
115
00:05:05,277 --> 00:05:07,651
One is the way he stops breathing
when he's sleeping.
116
00:05:07,846 --> 00:05:11,390
The other is when he pretends to be
someone he isn't because he likes a girl.
117
00:05:12,516 --> 00:05:16,223
There was the artsy chick he dated
who smoked cloves and ate bone marrow.
118
00:05:17,387 --> 00:05:20,433
There was the girl
whose parents were Hasidic Jews.
119
00:05:22,227 --> 00:05:25,341
And the only member of the
Camden County Black Power movement.
120
00:05:25,546 --> 00:05:26,840
The women liked Randy
121
00:05:26,965 --> 00:05:30,451
until he stopped pretending to be somebody
else and started just being Randy.
122
00:05:30,587 --> 00:05:32,181
I like it okay, I guess.
123
00:05:32,306 --> 00:05:35,150
But I think when people talk about
their dreams it's kind of boring.
124
00:05:35,286 --> 00:05:36,612
Unless there's aliens in it.
125
00:05:36,748 --> 00:05:38,740
Did Martin Luther King's dream
have aliens in it ?
126
00:05:38,875 --> 00:05:42,343
Unfortunately, Martin Luther King's
dream didn't have aliens in it,
127
00:05:42,475 --> 00:05:44,212
and that was just the beginning.
128
00:05:45,067 --> 00:05:46,643
It's not that he didn't try.
129
00:05:46,767 --> 00:05:50,243
It was just a question of time
before the real Randy exposed himself.
130
00:05:51,355 --> 00:05:53,171
This art doesn't have a flusher.
131
00:05:56,825 --> 00:05:59,470
And even though Randy
usually wore the right thing,
132
00:05:59,606 --> 00:06:01,181
he always said the wrong thing.
133
00:06:01,318 --> 00:06:02,441
Sorry that took so long.
134
00:06:02,578 --> 00:06:04,483
Got my foreskin
caught in my zipper.
135
00:06:04,608 --> 00:06:07,293
After each breakup,
Randy would get pretty depressed.
136
00:06:07,428 --> 00:06:09,371
He didn't turn
to drugs or alcohol,
137
00:06:09,496 --> 00:06:12,202
but he did turn to something
slightly harder to live with.
138
00:06:17,735 --> 00:06:22,412
* Lying in my bed I hear*
* the clock tick *
139
00:06:22,537 --> 00:06:24,851
* And think of you *
140
00:06:25,207 --> 00:06:32,012
* Caught up in circles,*
* confusion is nothing new *
141
00:06:32,477 --> 00:06:36,172
* Flashback warm nights *
142
00:06:36,418 --> 00:06:38,853
* Almost left behind... *
143
00:06:40,368 --> 00:06:42,972
* The second hand unwinds *
144
00:06:43,102 --> 00:06:47,206
* If you're lost, you can look *
* and you will find me *
145
00:06:47,861 --> 00:06:50,053
* Time after time *
146
00:06:50,420 --> 00:06:55,086
* If you fall I will catch *
* you I will be waiting *
147
00:06:55,278 --> 00:06:57,382
* Time after time *
148
00:06:58,916 --> 00:07:01,210
* Time after time *
149
00:07:02,658 --> 00:07:04,723
* Time after time *
150
00:07:06,086 --> 00:07:06,873
* Time... *
151
00:07:10,028 --> 00:07:11,900
* Time after time. *
152
00:07:12,037 --> 00:07:14,090
I was hoping this time
would be different, 'cause
153
00:07:14,227 --> 00:07:17,290
even though Randy liked the dents
in that lady's face, he hated cats.
154
00:07:17,426 --> 00:07:18,640
I love cats.
155
00:07:24,825 --> 00:07:26,842
Randy start to date
the cat lady and
156
00:07:26,967 --> 00:07:29,083
was fighting through his allergies to make things work.
157
00:07:29,218 --> 00:07:34,101
You're right. Getting out of my plac
to get some fresh air is a great idea.
158
00:07:34,237 --> 00:07:37,413
But just like every other time
he pretended to be someone else,
159
00:07:37,548 --> 00:07:39,282
I knew this was going to end badly.
160
00:07:42,427 --> 00:07:43,840
I'm worried about him, Crab Man.
161
00:07:43,978 --> 00:07:44,960
Have you talked to him ?
162
00:07:45,097 --> 00:07:47,501
I tried, but whenever you talk
about Randy's personal life,
163
00:07:47,626 --> 00:07:50,030
he gets edgy and
turns everything back on you.
164
00:07:50,166 --> 00:07:51,470
It's like stepping on a rake.
165
00:07:51,607 --> 00:07:53,440
Hey, Earl,
buy me some chicken wings ?
166
00:07:53,857 --> 00:07:55,240
You can't buy
your own chicken wings ?
167
00:07:55,377 --> 00:07:57,870
I'm facing my third strike and could
spend the rest of my life in prison,
168
00:07:58,005 --> 00:07:59,701
and you can't grant me
six scrawny-ass wings,
169
00:07:59,828 --> 00:08:01,673
some celery sticks
and blue cheese ?
170
00:08:01,806 --> 00:08:02,603
Fine.
171
00:08:02,736 --> 00:08:03,763
Get her some wings.
172
00:08:03,898 --> 00:08:05,362
And a pitcher of margaritas.
173
00:08:05,847 --> 00:08:06,742
Tip him good, too.
174
00:08:06,878 --> 00:08:08,333
We're saving up
for the kid's braces.
175
00:08:08,468 --> 00:08:09,602
Or a trampoline.
176
00:08:13,947 --> 00:08:16,083
That stupid cat
is making my hands burn
177
00:08:16,208 --> 00:08:18,811
and my eyes water and my tongue's
starting to feel like it did
178
00:08:18,937 --> 00:08:21,233
when I ate all that pink
cotton candy stuff in the attic.
179
00:08:21,365 --> 00:08:22,713
You should take allergy medicine.
180
00:08:22,837 --> 00:08:23,780
I take it all the time.
181
00:08:23,915 --> 00:08:25,760
It relaxes me in social situations.
182
00:08:25,887 --> 00:08:26,983
I tried that.
183
00:08:27,116 --> 00:08:30,461
It helped with the itching,
but it made me a little bit too thirsty.
184
00:08:33,807 --> 00:08:35,931
* Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug *
185
00:08:36,526 --> 00:08:39,282
* Make you want to holler hi-de-ho *
186
00:08:39,406 --> 00:08:41,812
* Burns your tummy, don'tcha know *
187
00:08:41,936 --> 00:08:43,971
* Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug *
188
00:08:47,716 --> 00:08:49,802
* Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug *
189
00:08:50,468 --> 00:08:53,190
* Make you want to holler hi-de-ho *
190
00:08:53,325 --> 00:08:55,682
* Burns your tummy, don'tcha know *
191
00:08:55,806 --> 00:08:57,430
* Chug-a-lug, chug-a-lug *
192
00:08:57,566 --> 00:09:00,190
* Chug-chuga-chucka-yeah. *
193
00:09:01,586 --> 00:09:03,480
I don't need medicine.
I'm fine.
194
00:09:03,618 --> 00:09:04,580
Randy,
195
00:09:04,976 --> 00:09:06,980
I need to talk to you
about something...
196
00:09:07,728 --> 00:09:08,443
personal.
197
00:09:08,575 --> 00:09:12,100
Oh, maybe I need to talk to you about
something personal, jerk head.
198
00:09:12,285 --> 00:09:14,022
See ?
Stepping on a rake.
199
00:09:14,967 --> 00:09:16,373
Randy, you need to listen to this.
200
00:09:16,507 --> 00:09:19,753
Yeah ? Maybe you need to listen,
mustache-too-big-for-your-face.
201
00:09:20,446 --> 00:09:24,072
Look, buddy, lash back
all you want, but I got to say,
202
00:09:24,208 --> 00:09:26,870
I don't know why you have to lie
to Judy and be something you're not.
203
00:09:27,007 --> 00:09:29,572
I mean, you're going to have
to be yourself sooner or later.
204
00:09:29,885 --> 00:09:30,942
Why not just do it now ?
205
00:09:31,076 --> 00:09:33,002
If I'm myself,
she won't like me...
206
00:09:33,136 --> 00:09:34,523
left-eye-lower-than-the-right-one.
207
00:09:34,668 --> 00:09:36,621
Randy, of course
she won't like you.
208
00:09:36,748 --> 00:09:39,253
You hate cats and
she's eventually going to find out.
209
00:09:39,386 --> 00:09:41,762
I've seen it happen...
time after time.
210
00:09:41,896 --> 00:09:44,981
Well, I'd rather have a girlfriend for two
weeks than no girlfriend for no weeks.
211
00:09:45,116 --> 00:09:46,402
Just leave me alone.
212
00:09:47,905 --> 00:09:49,872
If you fall,
I won't catch you...
213
00:09:50,057 --> 00:09:51,521
I won't be waiting.
214
00:09:54,725 --> 00:09:56,261
Oh, look !
The Grand Canyon !
215
00:09:56,395 --> 00:09:58,660
We should go there
all three of us.
216
00:09:58,797 --> 00:10:00,560
We can take a car ride
and sleep in a tent.
217
00:10:00,635 --> 00:10:01,830
And take one of those burro rides.
218
00:10:01,963 --> 00:10:04,358
I could be on one burro, and
you can hold Sebastian on the other.
219
00:10:04,484 --> 00:10:06,452
You're so strong, he's going
to want to ride with you anyway.
220
00:10:06,578 --> 00:10:07,734
I hate cats.
221
00:10:07,860 --> 00:10:08,611
What ?
222
00:10:09,074 --> 00:10:09,741
Huh ?
223
00:10:09,908 --> 00:10:11,451
You hate what ?
What did you say ?
224
00:10:12,813 --> 00:10:14,131
I'm allergic to cats.
225
00:10:14,257 --> 00:10:15,725
And, even if I wasn't allergic,
226
00:10:15,858 --> 00:10:17,941
I don't like them 'cause they act
like they're better than me,
227
00:10:18,062 --> 00:10:19,616
which maybe they are.
228
00:10:19,901 --> 00:10:20,993
I'm sorry.
229
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:25,536
I been acting like I'm somebody else,
and that's who you like, not me.
230
00:10:27,867 --> 00:10:28,671
Now...
231
00:10:30,716 --> 00:10:31,973
if you'll excuse me,
232
00:10:32,095 --> 00:10:36,023
I need to go buy a new Cyndi Lauper CD
and have myself a little cry.
233
00:10:38,466 --> 00:10:39,631
Randy, wait.
234
00:10:41,566 --> 00:10:43,692
I don't want to end up
like that sleepy cat lady.
235
00:10:43,828 --> 00:10:45,050
You're not like her.
236
00:10:45,188 --> 00:10:46,800
You're young and pretty
237
00:10:46,925 --> 00:10:49,613
and alert enough to wake up
if something pees on you.
238
00:10:49,738 --> 00:10:52,090
No, I mean,
I don't want to end up alone.
239
00:10:53,145 --> 00:10:54,233
Look, Randy.
240
00:10:56,196 --> 00:10:57,770
I'll get rid of Sebastian.
241
00:11:05,385 --> 00:11:06,891
I win.
242
00:11:10,205 --> 00:11:12,913
The good news is Randy and Judy
were going to be together.
243
00:11:13,048 --> 00:11:14,351
The bad news is
244
00:11:14,475 --> 00:11:16,610
I had to figure out
what to do with Sebastian.
245
00:11:17,225 --> 00:11:19,592
Crab Man, two beers,
and put one in a bowl, please.
246
00:11:19,727 --> 00:11:21,102
Why do you still have that cat ?
247
00:11:21,238 --> 00:11:22,671
I've been trying
to find a home for him,
248
00:11:22,806 --> 00:11:25,820
but nobody wants a chubby cat
who wheezes after he takes a dook.
249
00:11:29,265 --> 00:11:30,880
Maybe make his a light beer.
250
00:11:31,766 --> 00:11:33,040
Hey, Joy, you want a cat ?
251
00:11:33,165 --> 00:11:35,170
Do I look like I want a damn cat ?
252
00:11:35,555 --> 00:11:37,803
I think you should put this cat
on your list, Earl.
253
00:11:38,405 --> 00:11:40,253
No. The girl I took him from
is on there.
254
00:11:40,375 --> 00:11:41,560
I don't put animals on my list.
255
00:11:41,695 --> 00:11:42,623
I'm serious.
256
00:11:42,757 --> 00:11:45,411
He used to be a proud champion
before you stole him.
257
00:11:45,546 --> 00:11:47,232
Now he just looks sad.
258
00:11:47,368 --> 00:11:48,750
I can see it in his eyes.
259
00:11:48,876 --> 00:11:50,391
He misses being a champ.
260
00:11:50,526 --> 00:11:53,990
I saw Carl Lewis at the airport once,
and he looked the same way.
261
00:11:54,116 --> 00:11:56,321
Look, I'm not putting
a cat on my list.
262
00:11:56,458 --> 00:11:58,550
You would if you looked
into his eyes.
263
00:12:02,508 --> 00:12:04,283
He does have nice eyes, Earl.
264
00:12:04,806 --> 00:12:06,520
Five bucks if you kiss him
on the lips.
265
00:12:06,865 --> 00:12:09,373
The thought of putting an animal
on my list seemed crazy,
266
00:12:09,556 --> 00:12:12,571
but what if he did miss being a champion
'cause of what I did ?
267
00:12:12,925 --> 00:12:14,112
The more I stared,
268
00:12:14,247 --> 00:12:18,103
well, the more I started to see a sad little
Carl Lewis in there staring back at me.
269
00:12:18,238 --> 00:12:19,230
Damn it.
270
00:12:23,817 --> 00:12:27,681
While I entered the new world of trying
to get a cat back into championship shape,
271
00:12:27,978 --> 00:12:30,672
Randy entered the new world
of being himself around a girlfriend.
272
00:12:30,798 --> 00:12:32,880
Don't you want to take your shoes off
and get comfortable ?
273
00:12:33,117 --> 00:12:34,463
My feet smell.
274
00:12:34,605 --> 00:12:36,201
That's what feet
are supposed to do, silly.
275
00:12:36,337 --> 00:12:38,821
Why do you think God put them
so far away from your nose ?
276
00:12:46,935 --> 00:12:48,253
Quit, it's cute.
277
00:12:50,255 --> 00:12:53,823
* I see your true colors *
278
00:12:54,038 --> 00:12:56,542
* And that's why I love you *
279
00:12:56,676 --> 00:13:02,940
* So don't be afraid *
* to let them show *
280
00:13:03,076 --> 00:13:04,911
* Your true colors *
281
00:13:05,048 --> 00:13:10,220
* Your true colors *
* Are beautiful *
282
00:13:10,357 --> 00:13:13,792
* Like a rainbow *
283
00:13:16,775 --> 00:13:19,021
* If this world makes you crazy *
284
00:13:19,156 --> 00:13:21,841
* You've taken all you can bear *
285
00:13:21,978 --> 00:13:23,633
* You call me up *
286
00:13:24,928 --> 00:13:26,682
* You know I'll be there *
287
00:13:26,806 --> 00:13:32,462
* And I'll see your true *
* colors shining through *
288
00:13:32,596 --> 00:13:35,952
* I see your true colors *
289
00:13:36,088 --> 00:13:38,511
* And that's why I love you *
290
00:13:38,647 --> 00:13:44,351
* So don't be afraid *
* To let them show *
291
00:13:44,776 --> 00:13:47,651
* Your true colors... *
292
00:13:48,496 --> 00:13:51,671
It was finally show day, and
Sebastian and I were feeling good.
293
00:13:51,808 --> 00:13:53,153
And we'd gotten close, too.
294
00:13:53,276 --> 00:13:56,882
I even laid out two ties on the bed and
let him pick which one I should wear.
295
00:13:58,757 --> 00:14:02,521
Now entering the ring,
domestic shorthair
296
00:14:02,657 --> 00:14:07,382
Sebastian Dechamps
with handler Earl J. Hickey.
297
00:14:09,495 --> 00:14:13,372
Sebastian was keeping his cool,
but I was more than a little nervous.
298
00:14:28,498 --> 00:14:29,300
Sir ?
299
00:14:29,778 --> 00:14:32,052
Sir ? The cones are for the cat.
300
00:14:35,355 --> 00:14:38,701
I didn't know you exchange presents
on your two-week anniversary.
301
00:14:38,908 --> 00:14:40,212
I've never had one.
302
00:14:43,028 --> 00:14:44,152
Do you like it ?
303
00:14:44,376 --> 00:14:45,340
I love it.
304
00:14:45,537 --> 00:14:47,581
I've also never had
any jewelry before.
305
00:14:47,708 --> 00:14:50,712
Well, I did have a medical alert tag,
but I pawned it.
306
00:14:50,908 --> 00:14:52,650
I can't even remember what it said.
307
00:14:53,746 --> 00:14:55,541
As Randy put on his new necklace,
308
00:14:55,676 --> 00:14:59,011
he noticed it was not unlike
some of the other necklaces in the room.
309
00:15:00,388 --> 00:15:02,553
I can't wait to show you off
to all my friends.
310
00:15:02,678 --> 00:15:04,820
They all assumed
I was going to die alone.
311
00:15:05,095 --> 00:15:06,502
In fact,
Randy's new necklace
312
00:15:06,638 --> 00:15:09,010
wasn't the only thing
that was starting to bother him.
313
00:15:09,136 --> 00:15:12,780
He was starting to think maybe
the way Judy treated him wasn't normal.
314
00:15:12,908 --> 00:15:16,550
* Howling to the moonlight
on a hot summer night *
315
00:15:16,675 --> 00:15:20,581
* Singing the blues
while the lady cats cry... *
316
00:15:21,967 --> 00:15:23,953
Get down,
get down from there !
317
00:15:24,085 --> 00:15:24,920
Shoo !
318
00:15:25,386 --> 00:15:26,413
Go, go, go, go, go !
319
00:15:26,546 --> 00:15:31,593
* But I got cat class
and I got cat style *
320
00:15:34,238 --> 00:15:35,140
* Meow ! *
321
00:15:35,816 --> 00:15:38,530
Hey, Hillary !
Hillary, it's me !
322
00:15:38,666 --> 00:15:39,763
Wait right there !
323
00:15:39,896 --> 00:15:41,751
I want you to meet Randy !
324
00:15:41,887 --> 00:15:43,033
Come on, big boy !
325
00:15:43,167 --> 00:15:43,833
Come on !
326
00:15:43,968 --> 00:15:44,880
Come on !
327
00:15:52,957 --> 00:15:54,172
Enough !
328
00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:55,943
What ?
329
00:15:57,438 --> 00:15:58,693
I'm not a cat.
330
00:16:08,257 --> 00:16:09,311
Randy !
331
00:16:09,445 --> 00:16:11,303
What is going on ?
332
00:16:11,736 --> 00:16:13,541
I know you're not a cat.
333
00:16:13,996 --> 00:16:16,103
I mean, is it this ?
334
00:16:16,435 --> 00:16:18,623
You know, what if you got lost
and someone needed to find where you...
335
00:16:18,758 --> 00:16:19,563
I'm a human.
336
00:16:19,686 --> 00:16:21,562
When I get lost,
I ask somebody for directions.
337
00:16:21,686 --> 00:16:23,653
I do it, like, four times a week.
338
00:16:23,978 --> 00:16:26,812
Okay. All right.
Just calm down, all right ?
339
00:16:27,058 --> 00:16:29,740
Who's my special boy ?
Who's my special boy ?!
340
00:16:29,875 --> 00:16:31,922
Come on ! Come on !
Who's my... ?
341
00:16:34,318 --> 00:16:36,472
Oh, my God.
Look at me.
342
00:16:36,606 --> 00:16:38,442
Oh, I'm so sorry.
343
00:16:38,565 --> 00:16:39,810
It's okay.
344
00:16:40,125 --> 00:16:43,393
Sometimes people do things without
realizing that they're doing them.
345
00:16:43,577 --> 00:16:45,461
I tried so hard.
346
00:16:45,857 --> 00:16:48,331
I guess I am who I am,
you know ?
347
00:16:48,466 --> 00:16:49,450
I guess...
348
00:16:50,316 --> 00:16:51,801
I'm a cat lady.
349
00:16:52,245 --> 00:16:54,013
Maybe, someday,
I'll be granted three wishes,
350
00:16:54,148 --> 00:16:56,823
and I can use one to wish
I wasn't allergic to cats.
351
00:16:56,946 --> 00:16:59,321
And then I'd still have two left
for flying and world peace.
352
00:16:59,457 --> 00:17:02,711
Of course, that would mean that
Candy Randy ice cream would have to wait,
353
00:17:02,837 --> 00:17:05,342
but that was just basically
Rocky Road with red-hots.
354
00:17:06,267 --> 00:17:08,181
I wish I could be
a different person.
355
00:17:09,337 --> 00:17:10,311
I don't.
356
00:17:14,436 --> 00:17:16,052
Hey, mind if I keep that collar ?
357
00:17:16,188 --> 00:17:17,490
It will remind me of you.
358
00:17:18,098 --> 00:17:19,122
Here you go.
359
00:17:20,686 --> 00:17:21,860
I don't have anything to give you,
360
00:17:21,992 --> 00:17:23,986
but you'll remember me
when you go to turn on your lamp
361
00:17:24,111 --> 00:17:26,883
and it falls apart, because I broke it
and didn't want to tell you.
362
00:17:28,770 --> 00:17:30,736
Second place to a Persian !
363
00:17:30,866 --> 00:17:33,663
Like your cat's better
just 'cause it's from France !
364
00:17:33,806 --> 00:17:36,920
We got to go to Hendersonville
next week for the next cat show.
365
00:17:37,058 --> 00:17:37,782
Don't worry, buddy.
366
00:17:37,907 --> 00:17:40,452
We're going to mop the floor
with that furry little slut.
367
00:17:41,068 --> 00:17:42,702
It's all right, Earl.
I'll take him.
368
00:17:44,548 --> 00:17:45,590
But he's on my list.
369
00:17:45,716 --> 00:17:47,540
I'll finish what you started.
370
00:17:48,415 --> 00:17:49,660
Good-bye, Randy.
371
00:17:49,948 --> 00:17:52,422
- Bye.
- Hey, did you miss me ?
372
00:17:52,555 --> 00:17:54,981
Huh ?
Oh, you are ripped !
373
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:58,751
Feel that little bicep,
you sexy, sexy boy, you.
374
00:17:59,196 --> 00:18:00,853
Wait.
Why is she taking the cat ?
375
00:18:00,987 --> 00:18:01,871
How are you and her going to... ?
376
00:18:01,996 --> 00:18:02,952
We broke up.
377
00:18:04,608 --> 00:18:06,203
Should I get the boom box ?
378
00:18:06,407 --> 00:18:08,610
No. I don't think I need it.
379
00:18:08,747 --> 00:18:10,171
She liked me, Earl.
380
00:18:10,297 --> 00:18:12,050
Even when I laughed
so hard I ripped one,
381
00:18:12,186 --> 00:18:14,391
she laughed so hard
she ripped one.
382
00:18:15,088 --> 00:18:16,242
She liked me.
383
00:18:16,416 --> 00:18:17,692
Good for you, buddy.
384
00:18:18,507 --> 00:18:20,781
You know, I bet there's
a lot of girls out there that
385
00:18:20,916 --> 00:18:22,180
would like the real Randy.
386
00:18:22,315 --> 00:18:25,262
All I need is one.
One that hates cats.
387
00:18:25,425 --> 00:18:26,431
And birds.
388
00:18:26,815 --> 00:18:28,382
And pickles, dill pickles.
389
00:18:28,508 --> 00:18:31,072
Not the bread and butter kind
that Aunt Paula used to make.
390
00:18:31,656 --> 00:18:32,442
And Wednesdays.
391
00:18:32,567 --> 00:18:34,791
She's got to hate Wednesdays, too.
392
00:18:52,548 --> 00:18:53,361
Earl.
393
00:18:53,936 --> 00:18:54,742
Earl.
394
00:18:55,608 --> 00:18:56,530
Yeah ?
395
00:18:56,995 --> 00:18:59,341
That sleepwalking guy
is back again.
396
00:18:59,525 --> 00:19:01,102
Probably just thinks
this is his room.
397
00:19:01,226 --> 00:19:02,841
He lives right below us.
398
00:19:03,285 --> 00:19:05,622
I know.
I just thought I should tell you.
399
00:19:06,116 --> 00:19:08,491
- You want me to get rid of him ?
- I don't know.
400
00:19:08,716 --> 00:19:11,652
I'm not as scared of him anymore
now that I know he's not a ghost,
401
00:19:11,785 --> 00:19:14,250
but it's hard to sleep
with a stranger in here.
402
00:19:14,626 --> 00:19:15,660
I'll go talk to him.
403
00:19:15,787 --> 00:19:17,292
No. I don't think you should.
404
00:19:17,546 --> 00:19:20,191
I heard somewhere that if you wake
one of them up, it will kill them.
405
00:19:20,317 --> 00:19:22,131
That's only true
if you scare them.
406
00:19:22,265 --> 00:19:24,441
If you ease him awake,
he should be fine.
407
00:19:26,167 --> 00:19:27,432
Okay, I'll try.
408
00:19:34,047 --> 00:19:36,221
Paul ? Paul ?
409
00:19:37,036 --> 00:19:38,991
Paul ? Paul ?
410
00:19:39,648 --> 00:19:41,672
Paul ? Paul ?
411
00:19:42,277 --> 00:19:44,250
Paul ? Paul ?
412
00:19:44,786 --> 00:19:46,681
Paul ? Paul ?
413
00:19:47,028 --> 00:19:48,840
Paul ? Paul ?
414
00:19:49,225 --> 00:19:50,943
Paul ? Paul ?
415
00:19:51,285 --> 00:19:54,340
Paul ? Paul ? Paul ?
416
00:19:54,627 --> 00:19:56,430
Paul ? Paul ?
417
00:19:56,707 --> 00:19:58,533
Paul ? Paul ?
418
00:19:58,678 --> 00:20:00,461
Paul ? Paul ?
419
00:20:00,715 --> 00:20:02,471
Paul ? Paul ?
420
00:20:02,688 --> 00:20:04,441
Paul ? Paul ?
421
00:20:04,647 --> 00:20:06,343
Paul ? Paul ?
422
00:20:06,467 --> 00:20:07,863
Paul ? Paul ?
423
00:20:07,995 --> 00:20:09,272
Paul ? Paul ?
424
00:20:09,397 --> 00:20:10,802
Paul ? Paul ?
425
00:20:10,937 --> 00:20:12,460
Paul ? Paul ?
426
00:20:12,586 --> 00:20:13,981
Paul ? Paul ?
427
00:20:14,107 --> 00:20:14,840
Paul ?
428
00:20:19,228 --> 00:20:19,952
Paul ?
429
00:20:27,478 --> 00:20:29,182
I think I'll just let him be.
430
00:20:29,317 --> 00:20:30,740
He'll leave when he's ready.
431
00:20:30,865 --> 00:20:33,863
Transcript: Raceman
Synchro: Dingo
432
00:20:33,997 --> 00:20:36,991
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