1
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:51,250
Do the new neighbors
have any kids my age?
2
00:00:51,285 --> 00:00:53,049
Joseph's getting too active.
3
00:00:53,086 --> 00:00:55,851
I need someone to sit
around and watch TV with.
4
00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:56,857
Stop it!
5
00:00:56,890 --> 00:00:59,519
No more families on the block!
6
00:00:59,560 --> 00:01:01,119
Look at those free weights.
7
00:01:01,161 --> 00:01:03,790
That's the sign of
a fit, single woman.
8
00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:07,232
She's tired of the bar scene
and is looking for a man
9
00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:09,566
to share her foosball table
10
00:01:09,603 --> 00:01:12,095
and beer can collection with.
11
00:01:12,139 --> 00:01:14,802
Now, Bobby, if a teenager
moves into that house,
12
00:01:14,841 --> 00:01:18,005
I'm counting on you to teach
him our community values.
13
00:01:18,045 --> 00:01:20,810
I know there's a lot of pressure
being the Block Captain's kid,
14
00:01:20,847 --> 00:01:22,816
but that was the life
you were born into.
15
00:01:22,849 --> 00:01:25,284
KAHN: Hey, Country
Bear Jamboree!
16
00:01:25,319 --> 00:01:27,288
My grandma send
me birthday check,
17
00:01:27,321 --> 00:01:28,983
but it not in my mailbox.
18
00:01:29,022 --> 00:01:30,388
Which one of you take it?
19
00:01:30,424 --> 00:01:32,154
Why would we steal your check?
20
00:01:32,192 --> 00:01:33,421
How do I know?!
21
00:01:33,460 --> 00:01:36,658
Maybe your wife
needs new pitchfork.
22
00:01:36,697 --> 00:01:39,292
I hope the new neighbor
isn't another Kahn.
23
00:01:39,333 --> 00:01:41,302
His cracks about
Peggy are funny,
24
00:01:41,335 --> 00:01:44,066
but other than that,
he's completely useless.
25
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:47,597
Here comes the new neighbor.
26
00:01:47,641 --> 00:01:50,702
It is a lady!
27
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:53,077
A big lady.
28
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,081
It's a man.
29
00:01:54,114 --> 00:01:56,982
Oh, I didn't know this was
the type of neighborhood
30
00:01:57,017 --> 00:01:58,986
where guys stood
outside drinking beer.
31
00:01:59,019 --> 00:02:02,387
And I'm totally psyched, man!
32
00:02:02,422 --> 00:02:04,391
I'm totally psyched!
33
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:06,086
Well, you should be psyched.
34
00:02:06,126 --> 00:02:08,686
You can drink in the
alley until 8:15 p.m.
35
00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:12,097
It's all in the block charter
which I left in your mailbox.
36
00:02:12,132 --> 00:02:14,499
Hank Hill, Block Captain.
37
00:02:14,534 --> 00:02:16,696
Nice to meet you.
I'm Willie Lane.
38
00:02:16,737 --> 00:02:20,003
Huh. Anybody ever tell you
that you've got the same name
39
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:22,202
as a Dallas Cowboy
backup lineman
40
00:02:22,242 --> 00:02:25,110
from the 1976 to '79 seasons?
41
00:02:25,145 --> 00:02:26,113
No.
42
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:27,512
Yep. "Big" Willie Lane.
43
00:02:27,547 --> 00:02:30,073
Blocked a kick
to beat the 49ers.
44
00:02:30,117 --> 00:02:33,383
Then was cut one year later
and moved down to Mexico
45
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:36,720
where he now wrestles
animals for tourists' pennies.
46
00:02:36,757 --> 00:02:38,282
You sure about that, chief?
47
00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:39,293
Whoa, that's...
48
00:02:39,326 --> 00:02:41,693
that's a Super Bowl ring.
49
00:02:41,728 --> 00:02:43,697
Sweet Lord, you're
Big Willie Lane!
50
00:02:43,730 --> 00:02:44,754
Got dang, man.
51
00:02:44,798 --> 00:02:48,667
You're even better
than a single lady.
52
00:02:48,702 --> 00:02:49,670
Yay!
53
00:02:49,703 --> 00:02:52,605
I like this little
chicken chest.
54
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:54,267
He's got spirit.
55
00:02:54,307 --> 00:02:55,275
Yay!
56
00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:56,674
Ow, my-my head.
57
00:02:56,710 --> 00:02:58,338
Look at him over there, Peggy.
58
00:02:58,378 --> 00:03:00,370
They never lose that nobility.
59
00:03:00,414 --> 00:03:03,009
Oh, God, he's coming this way.
60
00:03:03,050 --> 00:03:04,143
Just... just look casual.
61
00:03:04,184 --> 00:03:07,712
WILLIE: Hey, Hank!
62
00:03:07,754 --> 00:03:09,723
I thought you'd
want to see this.
63
00:03:09,756 --> 00:03:11,884
It's the football from
the kick I blocked.
64
00:03:11,925 --> 00:03:13,860
Looks just like it did on TV.
65
00:03:13,894 --> 00:03:15,157
(clears throat)
66
00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,164
Oh, uh, Willie, this
is my wife, Peggy.
67
00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:18,165
(chuckling): Hey...
68
00:03:18,198 --> 00:03:20,224
Didn't you used to be
one of our cheerleaders?
69
00:03:20,267 --> 00:03:21,895
(laughing): Me? Oh, no.
70
00:03:21,935 --> 00:03:25,337
But I did go to a
Cowboy's game in 1978.
71
00:03:25,372 --> 00:03:28,240
Maybe you recognize
me from the stands.
72
00:03:28,275 --> 00:03:30,608
Dad, I changed my mind again.
73
00:03:30,644 --> 00:03:31,942
Medium rare.
74
00:03:31,978 --> 00:03:34,573
Think fast, big guy.
75
00:03:34,614 --> 00:03:35,673
(grunts)
76
00:03:35,716 --> 00:03:36,684
Listen here, buddy.
77
00:03:36,717 --> 00:03:37,685
You have to catch it
78
00:03:37,718 --> 00:03:38,879
out in front with your hands,
79
00:03:38,919 --> 00:03:40,888
not try to cradle
it into your body.
80
00:03:40,921 --> 00:03:44,050
It's a little something Billy
Joe DuPree showed me.
81
00:03:44,091 --> 00:03:46,526
"Billy Joe Dupree."
82
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,688
HANK: Way to go, Bobby.
83
00:03:48,729 --> 00:03:50,698
Now, you listen
to all the pointers
84
00:03:50,731 --> 00:03:51,755
this man gives you.
85
00:03:51,798 --> 00:03:53,960
He was taught about
football... and life...
86
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:55,798
From the great Coach Landry.
87
00:03:55,836 --> 00:03:58,601
Hey, Hank, there's a
Cowboy's game on later
88
00:03:58,638 --> 00:03:59,606
if you want to come over.
89
00:03:59,639 --> 00:04:01,870
Okay, yeah, that sounds great.
90
00:04:01,908 --> 00:04:03,001
And you can bring the guys.
91
00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:05,205
They seem pretty cool.
92
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,373
See, Peggy, I told
you the guys were cool.
93
00:04:11,418 --> 00:04:13,683
Run, damn it, run!
94
00:04:13,720 --> 00:04:15,814
No, don't go out of bounds!
95
00:04:15,856 --> 00:04:17,256
(sputters): Wuss!
96
00:04:17,290 --> 00:04:19,623
Passion. (horn blowing)
97
00:04:19,659 --> 00:04:20,627
Halftime.
98
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:21,628
I'll grab a few brews.
99
00:04:21,661 --> 00:04:23,254
And, hey, if we do this again,
100
00:04:23,296 --> 00:04:25,788
would you guys mind bringing
Sam Adams instead of Alamo?
101
00:04:25,832 --> 00:04:29,234
No problem. I'll just dip
into my son's college fund.
102
00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:31,670
Guys, my uniform is too tight.
103
00:04:31,705 --> 00:04:33,674
You think Willie
would be offended
104
00:04:33,707 --> 00:04:34,675
if I took my pants off?
105
00:04:34,708 --> 00:04:37,075
Got dang it, Bill,
don't screw this up.
106
00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:41,673
Hey, you guys want to see
some stuff from my career?
107
00:04:41,715 --> 00:04:42,774
Hank, you've seen this.
108
00:04:42,816 --> 00:04:45,513
It's the football from
that kick I blocked.
109
00:04:45,552 --> 00:04:49,956
Oh... and here's a picture
from that kick I blocked.
110
00:04:49,990 --> 00:04:50,958
Hey, Willie,
111
00:04:50,991 --> 00:04:54,826
I have something I think
you'd be interested in.
112
00:04:54,861 --> 00:04:57,023
Well, who's that handsome stud?
113
00:04:57,063 --> 00:04:59,692
That's you before
the weight gain.
114
00:04:59,733 --> 00:05:00,733
Hey, Willie,
115
00:05:00,767 --> 00:05:03,430
how'd you feel about letting
me borrow your Super Bowl ring
116
00:05:03,470 --> 00:05:06,497
to wear to Ladies Night
at Shananigans tomorrow?
117
00:05:06,540 --> 00:05:08,406
Bill, game room. Now.
118
00:05:08,441 --> 00:05:11,809
Can I have some more chips,
119
00:05:11,845 --> 00:05:14,178
or would that be
stepping over the line, too?
120
00:05:14,214 --> 00:05:15,182
Five! Four! Three! Two! One!
121
00:05:15,215 --> 00:05:17,116
We did it! Cowboys win!
122
00:05:17,150 --> 00:05:21,383
(cheering) (phone rings)
123
00:05:21,421 --> 00:05:23,549
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
124
00:05:23,590 --> 00:05:25,081
Cowboys win!
125
00:05:25,125 --> 00:05:26,491
Hey, Bob, what's up, brother?
126
00:05:30,530 --> 00:05:33,432
Huh. Willie specifically said,
"Come over for the game."
127
00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:36,837
Boomhauer, are we
overstaying our welcome
128
00:05:36,870 --> 00:05:38,463
if we watch the post-game show?
129
00:05:38,505 --> 00:05:41,703
Mmm. Well... toss-up, man.
130
00:05:41,741 --> 00:05:43,835
Oh, God. The post
game show's starting.
131
00:05:43,877 --> 00:05:44,845
What do we do?
132
00:05:44,878 --> 00:05:47,040
Well, it's our first
time at Willie's.
133
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,049
We don't want to
come on too strong.
134
00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:50,050
Got dang,
135
00:05:50,083 --> 00:05:52,609
I think that's Jethro Pugh.
136
00:05:52,652 --> 00:05:54,280
As God is my witness,
137
00:05:54,321 --> 00:05:56,847
if I ever get back
inside that house,
138
00:05:56,890 --> 00:05:59,553
I'm never going to leave.
139
00:05:59,593 --> 00:06:03,894
(loud music playing)
140
00:06:03,930 --> 00:06:05,990
One good thing
about other hillbillies...
141
00:06:06,032 --> 00:06:08,467
At least they all
pass out by 9:00.
142
00:06:08,501 --> 00:06:11,266
This guy need to shut up
or get stronger moonshine.
143
00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:14,797
Then call him to lower
music, but be nice.
144
00:06:14,841 --> 00:06:16,104
Maybe when we go on vacation,
145
00:06:16,142 --> 00:06:18,338
we finally have someone
to feed your stupid fish.
146
00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:24,147
♪ Feel like making love
to you. ♪ (phone ringing)
147
00:06:24,184 --> 00:06:25,184
Rock on.
148
00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:27,346
Yes, hello, rock on.
149
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:29,652
This Kahn Souphanousinphone,
your neighbor,
150
00:06:29,689 --> 00:06:31,055
and it's getting late.
151
00:06:31,091 --> 00:06:33,060
Would you please
lower Bad Company?
152
00:06:33,093 --> 00:06:34,857
Candy, climb on down.
153
00:06:34,895 --> 00:06:37,729
I'm going to take
care of this situation.
154
00:06:37,764 --> 00:06:39,733
Oh, Minh, I think I'm
getting somewhere.
155
00:06:39,766 --> 00:06:41,860
Now, which one are you, pardner?
156
00:06:41,902 --> 00:06:44,133
You right across the alley?
157
00:06:44,170 --> 00:06:45,138
Yeah, that me.
158
00:06:45,171 --> 00:06:47,003
He's coming to apologize.
159
00:06:47,040 --> 00:06:48,064
That's a start.
160
00:06:48,108 --> 00:06:51,545
Right on. So, your
house has the phone cord
161
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:53,843
running right by the
side of the house?
162
00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:56,577
Yeah, I'm not sure
why that matter, but...
163
00:06:56,616 --> 00:06:58,016
(loud static)
164
00:06:58,051 --> 00:07:00,213
♪ Feel like making love ♪
165
00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:03,849
(screams): The phone is
dead. Where my stun gun?
166
00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:07,224
WILLIE: ♪ Feel like
making love to you ♪
167
00:07:07,260 --> 00:07:09,354
Oh, my gosh, it's
almost midnight.
168
00:07:09,396 --> 00:07:12,093
♪ To you, and you, and
you, and you and all of you. ♪
169
00:07:12,132 --> 00:07:14,192
Did you move back the
curfew in your block charter?
170
00:07:14,234 --> 00:07:16,203
Because that would be very sexy.
171
00:07:16,236 --> 00:07:17,204
Well, sorry to be a tease,
172
00:07:17,237 --> 00:07:19,331
but I just made a
one-time exemption.
173
00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:22,365
Really? Then I want the fine
rescinded from my game night.
174
00:07:22,409 --> 00:07:24,378
Well, Peggy, the
appeals process...
175
00:07:24,411 --> 00:07:25,379
Oh, my God.
176
00:07:25,412 --> 00:07:28,439
Kahn's hassling Willie.
177
00:07:33,086 --> 00:07:35,248
Uh-oh, you in
for it now, big boy.
178
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,757
The Block Captain
never stand for nonsense.
179
00:07:37,791 --> 00:07:40,955
Hank, he cut my phone cable.
180
00:07:40,994 --> 00:07:42,018
Yeah, right.
181
00:07:42,062 --> 00:07:43,155
You're... dumb.
182
00:07:43,196 --> 00:07:45,791
Kahn, please tell me you're
not going to run over here
183
00:07:45,832 --> 00:07:49,132
and blame Willie every time a
phone call gets disconnected.
184
00:07:49,169 --> 00:07:50,694
WILLIE: Right on, Double-H.
185
00:07:50,737 --> 00:07:51,705
Right on.
186
00:07:51,738 --> 00:07:52,967
I am not lying!
187
00:07:53,006 --> 00:07:54,975
Now listen, you
make my family follow
188
00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:56,442
your stupid rules all the time.
189
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:59,002
So shut down this jock ball.
190
00:07:59,045 --> 00:08:00,604
It's a school night.
191
00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:03,742
Hey, Double-H, I'll bet
a Cowboy fan like you
192
00:08:03,783 --> 00:08:07,845
would love to meet Roger
Staubach's pool cleaner.
193
00:08:07,887 --> 00:08:09,185
He's in there? Now?
194
00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:11,782
Well, yeah, he's
a buddy of mine.
195
00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:12,918
Come on in and meet him.
196
00:08:12,959 --> 00:08:15,690
Uh... I wouldn't
know what to say.
197
00:08:15,729 --> 00:08:17,493
He's very easy to talk to.
198
00:08:17,530 --> 00:08:20,022
Now, get on in there.
199
00:08:20,066 --> 00:08:21,728
Hank, I need you!
200
00:08:21,768 --> 00:08:23,259
Hank...
201
00:08:23,303 --> 00:08:25,602
(whimpering): Block Captain.
202
00:08:35,582 --> 00:08:36,845
I cannot believe
203
00:08:36,883 --> 00:08:39,375
you met Roger
Staubach's pool cleaner.
204
00:08:39,419 --> 00:08:41,513
Yup. We played foosball.
205
00:08:41,554 --> 00:08:42,522
He's a great guy.
206
00:08:42,555 --> 00:08:44,524
Just a regular
guy, I tell you what.
207
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:45,786
KAHN: Hey, Hank Hill,
208
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:46,825
I gave your block charter
209
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,055
to Connie to take to school
210
00:08:48,094 --> 00:08:49,995
for report on hypocrisy.
211
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:55,799
She get an "A," and
teacher call you a monster.
212
00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:56,859
So what kind of haircut
213
00:08:56,903 --> 00:08:58,599
did the pool cleaner have, huh?
214
00:08:58,638 --> 00:09:01,472
Was he a redhead?
I'm picturing a redhead.
215
00:09:01,508 --> 00:09:03,875
Willie's giving me some
blocking lessons later.
216
00:09:03,910 --> 00:09:06,209
He says I'd make
a great lineman,
217
00:09:06,246 --> 00:09:07,578
like he was.
218
00:09:07,614 --> 00:09:10,607
My son is getting a clinic
from a Dallas Cowboy.
219
00:09:10,650 --> 00:09:13,449
I've always said you
had a lot of untapped bulk.
220
00:09:13,486 --> 00:09:16,183
I'm going to do a push-up!
221
00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:19,317
WILLIE: Which one of
you sports fans wants
222
00:09:19,359 --> 00:09:23,057
to give old Willie
a ride to work?
223
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:24,394
How about you, Double H?
224
00:09:24,431 --> 00:09:25,490
Excuse me, guys.
225
00:09:25,532 --> 00:09:28,764
Official Cowboy business.
226
00:09:41,815 --> 00:09:43,181
And that's how I
blocked that kick.
227
00:09:43,216 --> 00:09:45,776
That story gets better
every time you tell it.
228
00:09:45,819 --> 00:09:47,788
Hey, thanks for
the lift to work.
229
00:09:47,821 --> 00:09:50,154
I'm probably still legally
drunk from my party.
230
00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:51,158
(sighs)
231
00:09:51,191 --> 00:09:52,352
Yeah, uh, you know, Willie,
232
00:09:52,392 --> 00:09:55,487
I've been meaning to
talk to you about that party.
233
00:09:55,528 --> 00:09:57,497
Uh, I know you
haven't had a chance
234
00:09:57,530 --> 00:09:58,896
to read the block charter yet,
235
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:01,527
but, uh, it did
go on a little late.
236
00:10:01,568 --> 00:10:03,867
I hear you, chief.
237
00:10:03,903 --> 00:10:06,134
But it's hard for
me to go to bars.
238
00:10:06,172 --> 00:10:07,140
There's always one guy
239
00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:09,142
who wants to prove
how tough he is
240
00:10:09,175 --> 00:10:11,474
by taking on an
ex-football player.
241
00:10:11,511 --> 00:10:13,104
That's why I party at home.
242
00:10:13,146 --> 00:10:16,139
If I get in a fight, at
least it's with a friend.
243
00:10:16,182 --> 00:10:17,182
Very responsible.
244
00:10:17,217 --> 00:10:20,051
Hey, Hank, you're
a big Cowboy fan.
245
00:10:20,086 --> 00:10:23,147
How would you like to
buy Deion Sander's truck?
246
00:10:23,189 --> 00:10:26,216
I'll give you the
"friend's price."
247
00:10:26,259 --> 00:10:27,227
Oh, wow.
248
00:10:27,260 --> 00:10:29,161
Well, I-I mean, it's
a great opportunity,
249
00:10:29,195 --> 00:10:31,221
but I don't really
need another truck.
250
00:10:31,264 --> 00:10:33,529
Hank, thanks for the lift.
251
00:10:33,566 --> 00:10:36,491
Rock on.
252
00:10:36,569 --> 00:10:38,094
(chuckles)
253
00:10:38,138 --> 00:10:40,471
WILLIE: Hurry, Switzer.
254
00:10:40,507 --> 00:10:43,170
You can do it.
255
00:10:43,209 --> 00:10:44,404
There you go.
256
00:10:44,444 --> 00:10:45,412
Uh...
257
00:10:45,445 --> 00:10:46,445
Willie, I know
258
00:10:46,479 --> 00:10:48,209
Kahn's a pain in the neck,
259
00:10:48,248 --> 00:10:52,015
but this isn't really how
we do things around here,
260
00:10:52,051 --> 00:10:54,452
and even Kahn
never walks his dog
261
00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,183
on anybody else's lawn.
262
00:10:56,222 --> 00:10:57,417
I hear you, brother.
263
00:10:57,457 --> 00:10:59,449
I just lost my
head for a second.
264
00:10:59,492 --> 00:11:00,960
Oh, dang.
265
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:02,553
I forgot my baggie.
266
00:11:02,595 --> 00:11:05,394
I'll run home and grab one.
267
00:11:05,431 --> 00:11:06,399
Come on, Switzer.
268
00:11:06,432 --> 00:11:07,400
Come on, girl.
269
00:11:07,433 --> 00:11:13,532
PEGGY: Hank, how much
270
00:11:13,573 --> 00:11:14,683
longer are you going to stare
271
00:11:14,707 --> 00:11:17,176
at that big pile
of dog droppings?
272
00:11:17,210 --> 00:11:18,610
Not much longer.
273
00:11:18,645 --> 00:11:20,841
It's only been a
couple of hours.
274
00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,906
I'm sure he just forgot.
275
00:11:22,949 --> 00:11:24,577
(sighs)
276
00:11:24,617 --> 00:11:28,554
I guess I'll just go
pick it up myself.
277
00:11:28,588 --> 00:11:33,617
(Dale humming)
278
00:11:33,660 --> 00:11:35,720
Hey, Hank, Willie called me
279
00:11:35,762 --> 00:11:38,698
and asked me to
give him a ride home
280
00:11:38,731 --> 00:11:42,293
and to thank me, he gave me
281
00:11:42,335 --> 00:11:43,462
the "friend's price"
282
00:11:43,503 --> 00:11:48,271
on Cowboy legend Deion
"Prime Time" Sanders' Hyundai.
283
00:11:48,308 --> 00:11:50,277
Now, help me push
it into my garage.
284
00:11:50,310 --> 00:11:55,044
Dad, check out
what Willie taught me.
285
00:11:55,081 --> 00:11:56,310
(groans)
286
00:11:56,349 --> 00:11:59,513
Now who's your daddy, huh?
287
00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,418
Big Willie Lane!
288
00:12:01,454 --> 00:12:04,618
Bobby, what are you doing?
289
00:12:04,657 --> 00:12:05,886
That's cheating.
290
00:12:05,925 --> 00:12:09,089
Willie says it ain't cheating
291
00:12:09,128 --> 00:12:12,257
if you don't get caught.
292
00:12:12,298 --> 00:12:14,199
That's not true.
293
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:18,035
Well, what the heck
happened here?
294
00:12:18,071 --> 00:12:22,236
Your new pig-headed, jock
friend dug holes in my lawn.
295
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:23,243
(sighs)
296
00:12:23,276 --> 00:12:25,404
Lawn-scape assault
is in clear violation
297
00:12:25,445 --> 00:12:27,346
of article nine of the charter.
298
00:12:27,380 --> 00:12:28,279
(sighs)
299
00:12:28,314 --> 00:12:29,282
This ends today.
300
00:12:29,315 --> 00:12:34,845
Mister, you are out of control,
301
00:12:34,887 --> 00:12:36,651
and it's time you get in line.
302
00:12:36,689 --> 00:12:38,658
You know, I used to
think you were a cool guy.
303
00:12:38,691 --> 00:12:43,595
I can be very cool when someone
follows our neighborhood guidelines.
304
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:44,598
Now get over there
305
00:12:44,631 --> 00:12:46,725
and start helping
Kahn fill those holes.
306
00:12:57,677 --> 00:13:00,306
You know, Hank, you
seem to have a lot of spirit.
307
00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:02,212
How would you like a pep rally?
308
00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:04,581
Hey, we could make a bonfire!
309
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:08,713
No, don't... Stop that!
310
00:13:08,755 --> 00:13:15,389
(sighs): All
right, that does it!
311
00:13:15,428 --> 00:13:17,158
(laughing)
312
00:13:17,196 --> 00:13:19,756
So these guys started
a fire in the alley
313
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:23,702
and tore some
planks off my fence.
314
00:13:23,736 --> 00:13:26,001
You do realize
that this is a felony.
315
00:13:30,777 --> 00:13:31,777
Sweet Betty,
316
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,007
that's a Super Bowl ring!
317
00:13:34,047 --> 00:13:36,141
McMurtry, get your
keister over here.
318
00:13:36,182 --> 00:13:37,582
I'm Willie Lane.
319
00:13:37,617 --> 00:13:39,586
It's nice to meet you officers.
320
00:13:39,619 --> 00:13:42,179
This is the guy who
blocked that kick.
321
00:13:42,221 --> 00:13:44,588
Uh, Officers Brown and McMurtry,
322
00:13:44,624 --> 00:13:46,650
there's the matter
of the fire here...
323
00:13:46,693 --> 00:13:49,026
Hey, let me try that Super
Bowl ring on, will you?
324
00:13:49,062 --> 00:13:54,160
Last time that thing was
off was 500 beers ago.
325
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:55,168
(laughs)
326
00:13:55,201 --> 00:13:56,169
Officers, uh, about the fire.
327
00:13:56,202 --> 00:13:58,171
Willie, you didn't
start this fire, did you?
328
00:13:58,204 --> 00:13:59,172
He probably did it,
329
00:13:59,205 --> 00:14:04,007
and now he's
trying to pin it on me.
330
00:14:04,043 --> 00:14:06,979
You guys can't possibly
believe him. The man...
331
00:14:07,013 --> 00:14:07,981
Enough out of you.
332
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:08,982
Now get back inside
333
00:14:09,015 --> 00:14:10,745
and stop hassling Big Willie.
334
00:14:10,783 --> 00:14:16,017
Hey, if we kicked
a few footballs,
335
00:14:16,055 --> 00:14:19,025
could you block 'em?
336
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:24,292
All right, you snap and kick.
337
00:14:24,330 --> 00:14:26,356
(cheering)
338
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:32,729
Dad, can I have
a ride to the store?
339
00:14:32,772 --> 00:14:34,035
Willie borrowed my bike
340
00:14:34,073 --> 00:14:36,406
and seems to
have lost track of it.
341
00:14:36,442 --> 00:14:37,410
Chug! Chug! Chug!
342
00:14:37,443 --> 00:14:42,143
You know, for a guy who was
a pro athlete, Willie's drunk a lot.
343
00:14:42,181 --> 00:14:43,877
(sighs): Yeah, I know, Bobby.
344
00:14:43,916 --> 00:14:46,613
Have you thought about
where we're going to move to?
345
00:14:46,652 --> 00:14:49,144
I heard Tampa's nice.
346
00:14:49,188 --> 00:14:50,747
We're not moving anywhere.
347
00:14:50,790 --> 00:14:54,557
(men shouting)
348
00:14:54,594 --> 00:15:02,468
I got you in my sights.
349
00:15:02,502 --> 00:15:08,464
I'm going to pack, just in case.
350
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:13,009
Hank?
351
00:15:13,045 --> 00:15:14,536
Kahn,
352
00:15:14,580 --> 00:15:16,412
I'm sorry I didn't believe you.
353
00:15:16,449 --> 00:15:19,908
No man should have to live
to see this done to his lawn.
354
00:15:19,952 --> 00:15:22,046
So I was thinking we
could work together
355
00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:23,283
to get rid of Willie.
356
00:15:23,322 --> 00:15:25,314
I talked to my
father-in-law last night.
357
00:15:25,358 --> 00:15:27,793
He knows a guy who
will do it for 5,000.
358
00:15:27,827 --> 00:15:30,422
Kahn, I'll only operate
within the confines
359
00:15:30,463 --> 00:15:32,591
of state law and
the block charter.
360
00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,601
DALE: Incoming!
361
00:15:36,402 --> 00:15:37,426
You sure about this?
362
00:15:37,470 --> 00:15:39,769
Because maybe we can
get hitman to throw in Gribble
363
00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:41,798
as freebie.
364
00:15:49,482 --> 00:15:53,010
We mow in two minutes, Kahn.
365
00:15:54,020 --> 00:15:55,886
What do you think you're doing?
366
00:15:55,922 --> 00:15:57,948
Willie's sleeping
off a hangover.
367
00:15:57,990 --> 00:15:59,982
That's exactly what I figured.
368
00:16:00,026 --> 00:16:01,961
Kahn and I are going
to fire up our mowers
369
00:16:01,994 --> 00:16:04,327
every day at 7:00 a.m.,
370
00:16:04,363 --> 00:16:07,629
the earliest time for mowing
permitted in the block charter.
371
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:09,898
Eventually it'll drive
that hungover bastard
372
00:16:09,936 --> 00:16:11,427
off the block.
373
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,703
Over Bill's bruised and
lacerated body, you will.
374
00:16:14,740 --> 00:16:16,709
Lay down in front
of the mower, Bill.
375
00:16:16,742 --> 00:16:18,108
Okay.
376
00:16:18,144 --> 00:16:19,578
What happened to you guys?
377
00:16:19,612 --> 00:16:20,910
Bill, don't you remember
378
00:16:20,947 --> 00:16:22,916
when this was the
kind of neighborhood
379
00:16:22,949 --> 00:16:24,918
where you could leave
your door unlocked at night,
380
00:16:24,951 --> 00:16:26,977
and no one would
steal your refrigerator?
381
00:16:27,019 --> 00:16:28,920
I've been keeping
my food in the tub.
382
00:16:28,955 --> 00:16:32,050
And Dale, you believed in
the block charter so strongly
383
00:16:32,091 --> 00:16:34,253
you signed it with
your real name.
384
00:16:34,293 --> 00:16:37,229
It's the only time
I've ever done that.
385
00:16:37,263 --> 00:16:42,793
Gentlemen, it is a new
morning on Rainey Street.
386
00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:56,683
(engines roaring)
387
00:16:56,716 --> 00:17:03,555
(snarls, barks)
388
00:17:05,658 --> 00:17:06,658
It's not working.
389
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:08,251
Time for Plan B.
390
00:17:08,294 --> 00:17:09,557
There's a plan B?
391
00:17:09,595 --> 00:17:15,091
We didn't tell you for
your own protection.
392
00:17:16,802 --> 00:17:19,601
They wouldn't dare have
their basket-bottle tournament
393
00:17:19,639 --> 00:17:22,199
with Deion Sanders'
car in the way.
394
00:17:22,241 --> 00:17:25,040
They were going to make
me dance during halftime.
395
00:17:25,077 --> 00:17:26,443
WILLIE: We can't
play bottle donkey
396
00:17:26,479 --> 00:17:29,643
with that car in our court.
397
00:17:29,682 --> 00:17:30,945
WILLIE: Hey, Fitzy,
398
00:17:30,983 --> 00:17:36,047
Tom, Tommy, Jack, Joe, Bear!
399
00:17:36,689 --> 00:17:38,783
HANK: Oh, what the...?
400
00:17:38,824 --> 00:17:43,626
DALE: Deion's car!
401
00:17:45,498 --> 00:17:47,126
BILL (gasping): Hank, your lawn!
402
00:17:47,166 --> 00:17:49,499
I know, Bill, I know,
403
00:17:49,535 --> 00:17:52,266
but I think Willie just
tossed his last car
404
00:17:52,305 --> 00:17:56,640
on his last neighbor's lawn.
405
00:17:56,676 --> 00:17:59,805
Why would I tip a car
over on my own lawn?
406
00:17:59,845 --> 00:18:01,177
I don't know.
407
00:18:01,213 --> 00:18:02,442
It puzzles me.
408
00:18:02,481 --> 00:18:04,177
But Willie says he didn't do it,
409
00:18:04,216 --> 00:18:06,685
and we have no evidence
that proves otherwise.
410
00:18:06,719 --> 00:18:08,278
OFFICER: Uh, Willie, this here's
411
00:18:08,321 --> 00:18:10,847
Officers Collins and Winchell.
412
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:11,755
(chuckling)
413
00:18:11,791 --> 00:18:12,986
They're off duty
414
00:18:13,025 --> 00:18:14,857
but came by because
they wanted to meet you.
415
00:18:14,894 --> 00:18:16,522
Could we check out
that Super Bowl ring?
416
00:18:16,562 --> 00:18:18,140
WILLIE (chuckling):
This little old thing?
417
00:18:18,164 --> 00:18:19,223
Sure.
418
00:18:19,265 --> 00:18:20,631
Hey! Let's take a group picture.
419
00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:26,469
McMurtry, grab the Polaroid.
420
00:18:26,505 --> 00:18:30,499
Hey, I used to have
a camera like that.
421
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:32,375
It must have gotten
lost in the move.
422
00:18:32,411 --> 00:18:35,245
Well, here, take this one.
423
00:18:35,281 --> 00:18:36,214
POLICE DISPATCH: All units,
424
00:18:36,248 --> 00:18:40,117
310 in progress at
250 Arroyo Grande.
425
00:18:40,152 --> 00:18:43,281
Please respond.
426
00:18:44,023 --> 00:18:47,687
Heh! Little help.
427
00:18:47,727 --> 00:18:49,628
(frustrated growl)
428
00:18:49,662 --> 00:18:52,564
Help?! I help you get the
hell out of my neighborhood,
429
00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:56,126
you big fat, muscle-headed
load of rat-jackal-pig-dog-waste!
430
00:18:59,005 --> 00:19:00,598
You just called me a pig?
431
00:19:00,640 --> 00:19:02,768
Oh, you don't like that?
432
00:19:02,808 --> 00:19:05,243
Well, I don't care anymore!
433
00:19:05,277 --> 00:19:06,245
I don't sleep.
434
00:19:06,278 --> 00:19:08,247
My career is
going in the toilet.
435
00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:09,248
My little girl can't study.
436
00:19:09,281 --> 00:19:11,409
And all because
some fat, jock slob
437
00:19:11,450 --> 00:19:14,284
play a little football
and block a kick!
438
00:19:14,320 --> 00:19:15,288
I don't even know what it means
439
00:19:15,321 --> 00:19:16,380
to block a kick,
440
00:19:16,422 --> 00:19:19,517
but if you can do it,
then any idiot can do it!
441
00:19:19,558 --> 00:19:21,220
HANK: Back off.
442
00:19:21,260 --> 00:19:24,389
We don't fight on this block.
443
00:19:24,430 --> 00:19:27,958
(groans)
444
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,902
Kill him, Hank!
Bill's got your back!
445
00:19:30,936 --> 00:19:31,904
No, Dale.
446
00:19:31,937 --> 00:19:33,906
If I hit him back, it's a fight.
447
00:19:33,939 --> 00:19:35,498
Right now, it's assault.
448
00:19:35,541 --> 00:19:37,772
Ain't nobody going
to believe you, chief.
449
00:19:37,810 --> 00:19:39,608
Bear, you see me hit this guy?
450
00:19:39,645 --> 00:19:42,581
Yeah. I-I mean, no.
He-he tried to rob you.
451
00:19:42,615 --> 00:19:44,413
Oh, you did so hit Hank.
452
00:19:44,450 --> 00:19:46,009
Just look at his poor face.
453
00:19:46,052 --> 00:19:47,020
A big bruise
454
00:19:47,053 --> 00:19:49,522
and the words "sallad
syobwoc." Huh?
455
00:19:49,555 --> 00:19:56,052
That's weird.
456
00:19:57,596 --> 00:19:59,497
Looks like Willie
just hung himself.
457
00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,969
Kahn, take a picture.
458
00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:04,732
Good thinking, Hank.
459
00:20:04,770 --> 00:20:12,770
Now we got evidence.
460
00:20:14,980 --> 00:20:16,676
Dale, put it in your wall safe!
461
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:22,678
DALE: Squirrel tactic!
462
00:20:32,631 --> 00:20:34,031
Now, listen here.
463
00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:36,934
No one else in this town
has a Super Bowl ring,
464
00:20:36,969 --> 00:20:39,404
so that picture is
proof of assault.
465
00:20:39,438 --> 00:20:40,565
Assault? It...
466
00:20:40,606 --> 00:20:44,839
Willie can't afford another
assault charge, pardner.
467
00:20:44,877 --> 00:20:46,709
That'd be totally uncool.
468
00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:49,238
Then you've got two weeks
to get out of that house
469
00:20:49,281 --> 00:20:50,772
and off our block.
470
00:20:50,816 --> 00:20:52,876
I'm gonna need
more time than that.
471
00:20:52,918 --> 00:20:56,184
The charter clearly states that
when a neighbor is deposed,
472
00:20:56,222 --> 00:20:58,418
they get two weeks
to get off the block.
473
00:20:58,457 --> 00:21:02,553
And that's all you're getting.
474
00:21:15,441 --> 00:21:17,069
Thank you, Hank Hill.
475
00:21:17,109 --> 00:21:18,407
Here.
476
00:21:18,444 --> 00:21:19,708
Yep.
477
00:21:19,779 --> 00:21:20,747
Yep.
478
00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:24,080
Mm-hmm.
479
00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:27,518
In my experience, a lot of
people say they gonna hit you,
480
00:21:27,553 --> 00:21:28,782
but not many actually do it.
481
00:22:06,859 --> 00:22:07,986
HANK: Rock on.
482
00:22:08,027 --> 00:22:09,723
KAHN: Yes, hello, rock on.