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Captioning sponsored by FOX
BROADCASTING COMPANY
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and 20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
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Yep.
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Nancy refused to
make me eggs Benedict
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for breakfast again.
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It's not fair.
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I'm a good husband.
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The ones who kill their
wives and go to Death Row
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get to eat whatever they want.
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People on Death Row get
to eat whatever they want?
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For their last meal, yes.
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Oh. I could never kill anybody.
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(rock music blaring)
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Oh, man.
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That's like with
them noise pollution
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Man, like them dang
ole band Garbage, man.
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Ol' lead sing kinda cute,
but, you know, look, man.
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Dang it, Bobby.
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I let Joseph listen
to whatever he wants.
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'Course, I'm afraid of Joseph.
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♪ ...such a bad ass... ♪
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Bobby.
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(gasps)
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(shuts off music)
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(humming)
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Dad, what are you doing?
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Whoa, I gotta sit down.
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What in the heck
is on your head?
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They're my dreads.
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Aren't they cool?
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♪ Uh, uh, uh... ♪
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Now, I know you've
got a rule about wigs,
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but this is just temporary
until I can grow my own,
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just like Johnny Glockk.
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Isn't that the guy
who got arrested
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00:01:43,136 --> 00:01:45,469
for setting a car on fire?
37
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He had to, Dad... he got dissed.
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PEGGY: Bobby, here's
the goatee you wanted.
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Thanks. Oh... what
about the black nail polish?
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They were out.
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You will have to use a Sharpie.
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No. The only way
you're having a black nail
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00:01:58,986 --> 00:02:00,682
is if you hit it with a hammer.
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Why are you encouraging our son
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00:02:02,556 --> 00:02:04,081
to dress like a criminal?
46
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Oh, he's just playing, Hank.
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Gangstas and hos
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is his generation's
cowboys and Indians.
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That's what I'm talking about.
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What's the big deal?
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00:02:15,836 --> 00:02:17,828
I was just rocking
out to my music.
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If you're looking for
some entertainment,
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00:02:20,307 --> 00:02:23,539
I do have a very awesome
video that you might enjoy.
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If it's the one about
Esau the Eggplant
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and the prodigal cucumber, I've
seen it about a thousand times.
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I hear your beef.
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You're a teenager
and you're looking
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for something a
little more with it.
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00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:36,752
I got your back.
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00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:39,225
Hank, I know an after-
school youth group
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00:02:39,259 --> 00:02:40,750
that would be great for Bobby.
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The pastor there has done
some super work with teens.
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Youth group?
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00:02:45,565 --> 00:02:47,124
Sounds kinda boring.
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Sounds kinda perfect.
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Some positive influence
is just what Bobby needs.
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00:02:51,872 --> 00:02:53,340
But, Dad, it's after school.
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What if I want to
join a sports team?
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00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:56,502
Nice try.
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He'll be there.
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00:02:58,979 --> 00:03:01,847
I can't believe you're
making me do this.
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00:03:01,882 --> 00:03:03,043
It's so uncool.
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00:03:03,083 --> 00:03:05,609
You know what's not cool, Bobby?
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Hell.
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00:03:09,322 --> 00:03:10,756
Don't forget your Bible.
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00:03:10,791 --> 00:03:12,157
(groans)
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00:03:19,332 --> 00:03:20,698
(indistinct talking)
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00:03:31,478 --> 00:03:32,673
What are you looking at?
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00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,443
Hey, there, guys.
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00:03:34,481 --> 00:03:36,211
I was just, uh...
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00:03:36,249 --> 00:03:37,376
What's with the suit?
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00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:38,680
You a lawyer, suit?
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00:03:38,719 --> 00:03:41,188
No, uh... I-I-I don't
want any trouble.
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I was just looking for... uh...
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00:03:43,824 --> 00:03:45,452
What are you looking for?
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00:03:45,492 --> 00:03:46,516
I, um...
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00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:47,823
You lost?
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00:03:47,861 --> 00:03:49,727
Lonely? Scared?
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00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:50,492
Yes!
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00:03:50,530 --> 00:03:51,554
Well, then you came
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00:03:51,598 --> 00:03:52,657
to the right place.
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00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:56,492
Look, K's dropping in
for a Double Ore-Ida.
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Praise Him!
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00:04:00,774 --> 00:04:02,675
(cheering)
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00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:05,008
That was awesome.
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00:04:05,045 --> 00:04:07,173
Thanks, but not as
awesome as Jesus.
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00:04:07,214 --> 00:04:09,809
You guys are the
Christian youth group?
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00:04:11,184 --> 00:04:12,482
Pastor K.
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00:04:12,519 --> 00:04:14,181
Stroup said she was
sending over a kid
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00:04:14,221 --> 00:04:15,689
who likes to rock out. That you?
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Yeah.
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00:04:17,057 --> 00:04:18,685
Welcome to the flock.
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00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:20,694
Word to our Father.
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00:04:20,727 --> 00:04:21,727
Hosanna to the highest.
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00:04:22,863 --> 00:04:27,858
See, check out what this lucky
bastard got for his last meal.
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00:04:27,901 --> 00:04:29,836
Prisoner number 88725.
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00:04:29,870 --> 00:04:34,331
Six pieces of fried chicken,
six rolls, tin roof ice cream,
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00:04:34,374 --> 00:04:36,673
strawberry soda and lemon pie.
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00:04:36,710 --> 00:04:38,008
Oh, that sounds good.
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That's what I want.
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00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:41,309
How about this guy?
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00:04:41,348 --> 00:04:43,715
One dozen fried
eggs, one loaf of bread,
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00:04:43,750 --> 00:04:46,618
a bowl of salad
dressing, French fries
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00:04:46,653 --> 00:04:48,679
and three cartons of milk.
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00:04:48,722 --> 00:04:49,690
Oh, no.
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00:04:49,723 --> 00:04:51,214
That's what I want.
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If it were me, I'd choose
the world's rarest truffle.
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Then, while they
were searching for it,
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I'd tunnel my way to freedom.
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00:04:58,331 --> 00:05:01,927
'Course then I'd miss eating
the world's rarest truffle.
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00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:03,129
Quite the quandary.
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00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:04,468
I'll tell you what, man.
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00:05:04,504 --> 00:05:06,473
Talking bout I'd go out
in dang old style, man.
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You know, talking bout dang
ole rack of lamb, you know,
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00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:10,275
and a little ole foie gras.
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Dang ol' dinner is served.
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00:05:12,479 --> 00:05:13,447
HANK: Sorry I'm late.
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00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:14,812
The Weather Channel's got
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00:05:14,848 --> 00:05:16,942
some pretty exciting
stuff going on in Missouri.
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00:05:18,985 --> 00:05:20,817
I felt like walking home.
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00:05:20,854 --> 00:05:24,018
You know, enjoy
this glorious day.
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00:05:24,057 --> 00:05:26,720
So, uh, you have a good time?
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Yes, it was the best.
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I met some great guys,
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and I asked them
to come over later,
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00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:33,827
if that's okay?
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Well, of course it's okay.
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00:05:35,535 --> 00:05:37,629
I'll even set up the tetherball.
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00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,766
Thanks for making me go, Dad.
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My son just thanked me
for taking him to church.
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(sniffs)
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Yes, I switched.
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Do not start.
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00:05:53,553 --> 00:05:54,714
(crashing)
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Possum.
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What the...?
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00:05:58,592 --> 00:06:01,426
What are you guys
doing to that garbage can?
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00:06:01,461 --> 00:06:03,589
That is not its intended use.
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00:06:03,630 --> 00:06:04,791
Hey, guys!
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00:06:04,831 --> 00:06:06,891
Bobby, don't get too close.
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00:06:06,933 --> 00:06:08,094
What are you talking about?
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These are my friends
from the youth group.
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They're cool, and
they're totally Christian.
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Hey, check this out. All right.
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Yeah.
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I... I don't understand.
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Hey, dude, I'm up.
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Can you hold my Bible?
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Uh...
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You don't have to just hold it.
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You could read it, you know.
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Don't tell me to read the Bible.
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Praise Him!
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Can you believe the way
that kid was sassing me?
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I was reading the Bible
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00:06:42,068 --> 00:06:42,865
before that little
punk was born.
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Maybe it's just me,
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00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,502
but I'd rather Bobby
be in a Christian gang
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00:06:46,539 --> 00:06:48,405
than one of those
murdering gangs.
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Well, maybe you're right.
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Wait, I-I think that
one is smoking.
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Oh, no, he's praying.
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LUANNE: Thanks for having me
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over for dinner.
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Mine was a disaster.
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I thought hot dogs
never went bad.
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00:07:03,556 --> 00:07:06,492
Would anybody mind
if I said grace tonight?
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Sure, Bobby.
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I want to give a shout-out
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00:07:09,963 --> 00:07:11,932
to the man who
makes it all happen.
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00:07:11,965 --> 00:07:14,457
Props be to you for
this most bountiful meal
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00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:15,901
that sits before us.
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00:07:15,936 --> 00:07:17,404
Okay, check it.
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God, you've got skills.
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00:07:19,372 --> 00:07:20,601
You represent
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00:07:20,640 --> 00:07:22,336
in these vegetables
and in this napkin
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and in the dirt that
grows the grain
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00:07:24,177 --> 00:07:25,805
that makes the
garlic breadsticks
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00:07:25,845 --> 00:07:28,542
that are on this
table today, yes, yes.
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00:07:28,581 --> 00:07:30,675
HANK: Okay, Bobby.
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00:07:30,717 --> 00:07:32,242
God appreciates the support,
192
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:34,550
but I'm sure He wouldn't
want the pot roast to get cold.
193
00:07:34,587 --> 00:07:35,714
Now, let's wrap it up.
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Sure thing.
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Thanks, J-Man. Peace.
196
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What up, James?
197
00:07:49,836 --> 00:07:51,566
Peace be with you, Brad.
198
00:07:51,604 --> 00:07:53,266
Hey, Bobby, check it out.
199
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Righteous!
200
00:07:56,543 --> 00:07:58,239
You should see Pastor K's ride.
201
00:07:58,278 --> 00:07:59,371
He's got the Resurrection
202
00:07:59,412 --> 00:08:01,176
airbrushed on the
back of his Jeep.
203
00:08:01,214 --> 00:08:03,240
PASTOR K: Hey,
brothers, gather 'round.
204
00:08:03,283 --> 00:08:04,979
Time to feel the Word.
205
00:08:05,018 --> 00:08:06,680
Welcome, everybody.
206
00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,951
Trent, you got our
verse of the day?
207
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:12,155
"Test all things.
208
00:08:12,192 --> 00:08:14,752
Hold fast what is good."
209
00:08:14,794 --> 00:08:17,958
Thessalonians 5:21.
210
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:19,489
Nice job, brother.
211
00:08:19,532 --> 00:08:21,262
That verse was
running through my spirit
212
00:08:21,301 --> 00:08:22,997
when I went rock
climbing last weekend.
213
00:08:23,036 --> 00:08:24,299
To be tight with the Lord,
214
00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,670
you got to take
your faith to the limit.
215
00:08:26,706 --> 00:08:27,264
You know what I'm talking about?
216
00:08:27,307 --> 00:08:28,240
The power!
217
00:08:28,274 --> 00:08:29,242
That's right.
218
00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:30,903
Nothing runs without power.
219
00:08:30,944 --> 00:08:33,504
I mean, your amp is worthless
unless it gets that juice.
220
00:08:33,546 --> 00:08:35,310
And so are we.
221
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:37,579
So you got to find
a way to plug in.
222
00:08:37,617 --> 00:08:39,984
Test all things
to find the good.
223
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,784
But how do you know what's good?
224
00:08:41,821 --> 00:08:43,949
It's whatever sticks
to your spirit, man.
225
00:08:43,990 --> 00:08:45,788
Whatever God
tattoos on your soul.
226
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:48,124
We're all searching
for that eternal ink.
227
00:08:48,161 --> 00:08:49,789
(indistinct utterances
of understanding)
228
00:08:49,829 --> 00:08:52,196
All right, let us pray.
229
00:08:52,232 --> 00:08:54,827
And don't forget to say a
little something for Charlie
230
00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,748
who's at home with a
wicked nose ring infection.
231
00:09:02,175 --> 00:09:03,175
What in...?
232
00:09:03,209 --> 00:09:04,871
(grunts)
233
00:09:04,911 --> 00:09:06,846
Oh, I thought he
had it that time.
234
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:09,543
I don't know what to make
of this youth group of Bobby's.
235
00:09:09,582 --> 00:09:11,244
Last night he broke curfew,
236
00:09:11,284 --> 00:09:12,843
but he was up reading the Bible.
237
00:09:12,886 --> 00:09:15,355
What do you do with that?
238
00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:17,199
Maybe you should punish
him Old Testament style.
239
00:09:17,223 --> 00:09:20,887
A religious boy like Bobby
would appreciate the irony.
240
00:09:20,927 --> 00:09:22,122
Bobby, take that off.
241
00:09:22,162 --> 00:09:23,562
You can't wear a T-shirt
242
00:09:23,596 --> 00:09:25,394
with that word on it.
243
00:09:25,432 --> 00:09:27,492
Such vulgarity.
244
00:09:27,534 --> 00:09:30,698
Wait, which word,
Hank... Satan or sucks?
245
00:09:30,737 --> 00:09:32,638
Well... either.
246
00:09:32,672 --> 00:09:34,538
Why not, Dad?
247
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:35,507
Satan does suck.
248
00:09:35,542 --> 00:09:36,566
I know, but...
249
00:09:36,609 --> 00:09:37,736
He's right, Hank.
250
00:09:37,777 --> 00:09:39,973
What does your shirt
say, "Satan Rules"?
251
00:09:43,917 --> 00:09:45,545
So I was thinking.
252
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:48,453
Why do criminals get
to have all the good food
253
00:09:48,488 --> 00:09:49,751
and we get nothing?
254
00:09:49,789 --> 00:09:52,759
Bill, you pay taxes,
aren't you outraged?
255
00:09:52,792 --> 00:09:53,792
Yes, I am!
256
00:09:53,827 --> 00:09:55,090
You know what?
257
00:09:55,128 --> 00:09:57,654
We should have
our own last meals.
258
00:09:57,697 --> 00:09:59,508
Hey man, talkin' 'bout
let's go over my place, man.
259
00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:01,277
It'd be just like a dang
ol' breakfast club, man,
260
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:03,212
'cept we're going for dinner
instead, you know, like,
261
00:10:03,236 --> 00:10:05,364
like, got no Judd
Nelson either, man.
262
00:10:05,405 --> 00:10:06,737
There you go!
263
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:08,765
The first meeting of
the Last Meal Club
264
00:10:08,808 --> 00:10:11,039
convenes at Boomhauer's!
265
00:10:12,512 --> 00:10:15,004
I love it when we do things!
266
00:10:15,048 --> 00:10:16,914
And then Cain was all like,
267
00:10:16,950 --> 00:10:19,784
"I ain't supposed to be
looking out for my bro, yo."
268
00:10:19,819 --> 00:10:22,345
I didn't know that
was in Genesis.
269
00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:25,187
Bobby, you are so good at this.
270
00:10:25,225 --> 00:10:27,922
I owe it all to my
Extreme Teen Bible.
271
00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:29,623
And Pastor K.
272
00:10:29,662 --> 00:10:32,962
He wrote a 22-minute
song about the Disciples.
273
00:10:32,999 --> 00:10:35,059
And if he can
remember all the words,
274
00:10:35,101 --> 00:10:37,593
he's going to play
it at MessiahFest.
275
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:39,367
Wow, MessiahFest!
276
00:10:39,405 --> 00:10:41,101
Are you going to go?
277
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:43,235
Uh, I don't know
if Dad'll let me.
278
00:10:43,276 --> 00:10:44,710
It'll take a miracle
279
00:10:44,744 --> 00:10:46,303
to make him come around,
280
00:10:46,346 --> 00:10:49,043
but I guess that's what
the Bible is all about.
281
00:10:49,082 --> 00:10:51,449
Can I get a what-what?
282
00:10:51,484 --> 00:10:54,283
(electric guitar playing)
283
00:10:54,320 --> 00:10:55,320
Yeah.
284
00:10:55,355 --> 00:10:56,983
Hear the Word.
285
00:10:57,023 --> 00:10:58,787
Rejoice.
286
00:10:58,825 --> 00:11:00,123
Uh-huh.
287
00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:01,992
(playing stops)
288
00:11:02,028 --> 00:11:03,223
Yeah. Uh-huh.
289
00:11:03,263 --> 00:11:04,373
What were you
doing there, brother?
290
00:11:04,397 --> 00:11:06,559
Sorry, I was just
feeling the spirit.
291
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,261
No, man, it works.
292
00:11:08,301 --> 00:11:11,237
That's just what I need to help
spread the fire at MessiahFest.
293
00:11:11,271 --> 00:11:13,137
How'd you feel
about backing me up?
294
00:11:13,173 --> 00:11:15,472
On stage?
295
00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:16,908
Relax, brother.
296
00:11:18,111 --> 00:11:19,588
Listen, when I get
nervous before a gig,
297
00:11:19,612 --> 00:11:21,103
I just look at this.
298
00:11:23,550 --> 00:11:25,485
Cool.
299
00:11:28,488 --> 00:11:31,515
Hey, Dad, what
do you think of this?
300
00:11:31,558 --> 00:11:34,187
Well, Bobby, it's, uh, so, uh...
301
00:11:34,227 --> 00:11:35,456
What am I looking at?
302
00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:37,396
It's my tattoo.
303
00:11:37,430 --> 00:11:39,695
No gotdang way.
304
00:11:39,732 --> 00:11:40,927
Dad, it's okay.
305
00:11:40,967 --> 00:11:42,560
This is what you do now
306
00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:45,470
when you want to give
mad respect to the Lord.
307
00:11:45,505 --> 00:11:47,303
The Lord has been
getting mad respect
308
00:11:47,340 --> 00:11:48,706
since the beginning of time.
309
00:11:48,741 --> 00:11:50,710
He doesn't need you
defacing your body.
310
00:11:50,743 --> 00:11:53,110
But...
311
00:11:53,146 --> 00:11:54,190
No son of mine
is getting a tattoo.
312
00:11:54,214 --> 00:11:55,341
End of discussion.
313
00:11:57,217 --> 00:12:00,119
Hey, I know what this is.
314
00:12:00,153 --> 00:12:01,348
It's a test.
315
00:12:01,387 --> 00:12:03,049
Like with Job.
316
00:12:03,089 --> 00:12:05,786
(chuckling): You rascal!
317
00:12:10,163 --> 00:12:11,893
You know that comedian's joke
318
00:12:11,931 --> 00:12:15,129
about how you always get
the cart with a wobbly wheel?
319
00:12:15,168 --> 00:12:16,295
It's so true.
320
00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:18,168
I love that comedian.
321
00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:21,866
Hmm, I still not sure.
322
00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:25,470
Hey, hillbillies.
323
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:27,002
Why so much in cart?
324
00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:28,981
Food stamps expire today?
325
00:12:29,015 --> 00:12:30,015
No.
326
00:12:30,049 --> 00:12:31,779
We're cooking our last meals.
327
00:12:31,818 --> 00:12:34,151
Why should you
have to kill somebody
328
00:12:34,187 --> 00:12:35,664
just to get some decent
food around here?
329
00:12:35,688 --> 00:12:37,281
Bah, you wouldn't know...
330
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:38,882
Hey, is that filo dough?
331
00:12:38,925 --> 00:12:40,951
Talkin' 'bout spana-dang
ol' kopita man.
332
00:12:40,994 --> 00:12:44,487
Hmm, the quest
for the perfect meal.
333
00:12:44,530 --> 00:12:46,965
Of course it must
start with shrimp.
334
00:12:49,035 --> 00:12:52,130
Dead man eating... shrimp!
335
00:12:57,777 --> 00:12:59,837
Why didn't Jesus catch me?
336
00:12:59,879 --> 00:13:01,347
He has a plan for you.
337
00:13:01,381 --> 00:13:03,316
The Miller Flip just
isn't part of it yet.
338
00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,347
Are you Pastor K?
339
00:13:06,386 --> 00:13:07,513
Yeah, brother.
340
00:13:07,553 --> 00:13:08,885
I'm Bobby Hill's father,
341
00:13:08,921 --> 00:13:10,532
and I want to talk to
you about this garbage
342
00:13:10,556 --> 00:13:12,650
you're teaching my boy.
343
00:13:12,692 --> 00:13:14,058
Well, hold up.
344
00:13:14,093 --> 00:13:15,137
You don't want me
teaching your son about God?
345
00:13:15,161 --> 00:13:16,686
Well, that part's fine.
346
00:13:16,729 --> 00:13:17,924
It's the other junk.
347
00:13:17,964 --> 00:13:20,058
The obscene
clothing, the tattoos...
348
00:13:20,099 --> 00:13:21,362
Dude, you don't have to act
349
00:13:21,401 --> 00:13:22,869
or dress a certain way for God.
350
00:13:22,902 --> 00:13:25,599
You can hang with
Him anyway, anywhere.
351
00:13:25,638 --> 00:13:27,903
Don't you think Jesus is
right here on this half pipe?
352
00:13:27,940 --> 00:13:30,808
I'm sure He's a lot of
places He doesn't want to be.
353
00:13:30,843 --> 00:13:32,505
What's more important...
354
00:13:32,545 --> 00:13:34,912
That Bobby's a Christian or
that he has a proper haircut?
355
00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:36,643
I'm not giving up on either.
356
00:13:36,683 --> 00:13:38,413
Now stay away from my boy.
357
00:13:40,787 --> 00:13:42,619
BOBBY: Pharaoh's
on our tail, Mom.
358
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,918
My strength is low.
359
00:13:43,956 --> 00:13:45,549
I need some milk and honey.
360
00:13:45,591 --> 00:13:46,591
That's enough.
361
00:13:46,626 --> 00:13:47,594
This whole thing
362
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:48,822
stops now.
363
00:13:48,861 --> 00:13:50,105
You're getting
rid of all this stuff
364
00:13:50,129 --> 00:13:51,358
and you're going to church
365
00:13:51,397 --> 00:13:53,457
in a suit and tie like
we've always done.
366
00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:54,728
But Pastor K says...
367
00:13:54,767 --> 00:13:56,895
And you can forget
about that Pastor K.
368
00:13:56,936 --> 00:13:58,928
PEGGY: Woo! I am out of Egypt!
369
00:13:58,971 --> 00:14:01,099
And look at Moses dance!
370
00:14:01,140 --> 00:14:02,938
Peggy, this is serious.
371
00:14:02,975 --> 00:14:04,910
Oh, Hank, you are overreacting.
372
00:14:04,944 --> 00:14:08,108
These are good Christian
kids having good Christian fun.
373
00:14:08,147 --> 00:14:09,775
You think this is fun?
374
00:14:09,816 --> 00:14:11,842
He looks like a burglar.
375
00:14:11,884 --> 00:14:13,318
What?
376
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,083
What's that in your ear?
377
00:14:15,121 --> 00:14:16,589
My testimonial.
378
00:14:16,622 --> 00:14:18,557
No. Uh-uh. That's an earring.
379
00:14:18,591 --> 00:14:19,820
You're grounded, mister.
380
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:22,158
But MessiahFest
is this afternoon.
381
00:14:22,195 --> 00:14:24,596
I'm Pastor K's backup guy.
382
00:14:24,630 --> 00:14:25,928
Mom?
383
00:14:25,965 --> 00:14:27,991
I was on board with
baptizing Ladybird,
384
00:14:28,034 --> 00:14:29,093
but how could you destroy
385
00:14:29,135 --> 00:14:30,797
those perfect little
ears I gave you?
386
00:14:30,837 --> 00:14:31,837
Hand it over.
387
00:14:38,344 --> 00:14:43,044
You guys just don't understand
how I feel about Jesus!
388
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:01,625
(Hank groans)
389
00:15:01,667 --> 00:15:03,067
MessiahFest.
390
00:15:03,102 --> 00:15:05,765
When I was young,
391
00:15:05,805 --> 00:15:07,149
you went to rock and roll
concerts on Saturday night
392
00:15:07,173 --> 00:15:09,165
and asked for
forgiveness on Sunday.
393
00:15:09,208 --> 00:15:11,143
Now it's all mixed together.
394
00:15:11,177 --> 00:15:12,577
I don't know, Hank.
395
00:15:12,612 --> 00:15:15,172
Something about scraping
off that bumper sticker
396
00:15:15,214 --> 00:15:16,842
seems a little sacrilegious.
397
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:19,546
Bobby loves God,
you worship the devil.
398
00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,383
Dinners must be tense.
399
00:15:21,421 --> 00:15:23,549
This has nothing
to do with religion.
400
00:15:23,589 --> 00:15:25,888
I've always been
against vandalism,
401
00:15:25,925 --> 00:15:28,485
be it on my bumper
or in my son's ear.
402
00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:30,394
I'm just setting things right.
403
00:15:30,430 --> 00:15:32,729
Now I'm going to finish
the job in Bobby's room.
404
00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,028
(sighs)
405
00:15:34,066 --> 00:15:36,661
How many Footprints
posters does a kid need?
406
00:15:40,473 --> 00:15:41,839
Bobby?
407
00:15:44,811 --> 00:15:47,804
Ah, damn, his Bible's gone.
408
00:15:47,847 --> 00:15:51,443
(rock music playing)
409
00:15:53,686 --> 00:15:54,984
(scratching)
410
00:15:55,021 --> 00:15:56,819
(laughing)
411
00:15:56,856 --> 00:15:59,121
(chanting): Praise
him! Praise him!
412
00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:03,089
Pastor K, what do you think?
413
00:16:03,129 --> 00:16:05,598
Sharp.
414
00:16:05,631 --> 00:16:07,122
Well, I better go now.
415
00:16:07,166 --> 00:16:09,499
One of the bands
asked me to leave
416
00:16:09,535 --> 00:16:11,936
before I give them
impure thoughts.
417
00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:15,373
Hey, K, dig the chain. New?
418
00:16:15,408 --> 00:16:17,138
Yeah. Thanks, Pop.
419
00:16:17,176 --> 00:16:18,769
That was your dad?
420
00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,404
Yeah, he's a roadie
for The A-Men.
421
00:16:20,446 --> 00:16:21,744
They've been spreading the word
422
00:16:21,781 --> 00:16:23,147
across North America all summer.
423
00:16:23,182 --> 00:16:24,150
So, you ready to rock?
424
00:16:24,183 --> 00:16:25,412
Let's do it.
425
00:16:25,451 --> 00:16:26,976
(ska music playing)
426
00:16:27,019 --> 00:16:30,820
♪ W-W-W-Want a Whataburger,
I'm all out of dough ♪
427
00:16:30,857 --> 00:16:33,656
♪ It's okay, it's
okay 'cause I know ♪
428
00:16:33,693 --> 00:16:36,492
♪ God will provide,
He'll provide for us all ♪
429
00:16:36,529 --> 00:16:39,260
♪ Might not get a large fry,
but we'll always get a small. ♪
430
00:16:39,298 --> 00:16:41,324
(shudders)
431
00:16:41,367 --> 00:16:44,895
Oh, it all smells so good.
432
00:16:44,937 --> 00:16:46,496
I bet bonny Prince Charles
433
00:16:46,539 --> 00:16:48,337
eats like this every night.
434
00:16:48,374 --> 00:16:53,142
I would be proud to make this
sumptuous banquet my last meal.
435
00:16:54,547 --> 00:16:56,243
Bon appetit!
436
00:16:56,282 --> 00:17:00,049
Remember, after this, the
next flavor in your mouth
437
00:17:00,086 --> 00:17:02,521
will be the sour taste of death.
438
00:17:02,555 --> 00:17:04,524
(all chuckle)
439
00:17:04,557 --> 00:17:06,185
(coughs)
440
00:17:06,225 --> 00:17:07,193
Oh...
441
00:17:07,226 --> 00:17:08,819
No, no.
442
00:17:10,429 --> 00:17:13,866
Well, some, dang ol'...
dang ol' dig in, man.
443
00:17:13,900 --> 00:17:16,529
Uh, here, Bill,
let me serve you.
444
00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,538
But I don't want to die!
445
00:17:18,571 --> 00:17:20,972
Gotdang, man, talkin' bout
dang ol' superstitions, man.
446
00:17:21,007 --> 00:17:22,532
Pass me that dang ol' salt, man,
447
00:17:22,575 --> 00:17:25,340
I'm gonna throw a little bit of
that crap over my shoulder, man.
448
00:17:25,378 --> 00:17:30,476
Yeah, uh, I had a big lunch
that, uh, didn't tempt fate.
449
00:17:30,516 --> 00:17:32,576
Oh, coming! Yeah, you hear that?
450
00:17:32,618 --> 00:17:33,813
Minh call me.
451
00:17:33,853 --> 00:17:35,481
(yells)
452
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:36,853
Whoa.
453
00:17:38,524 --> 00:17:40,425
Save yourselves!
454
00:17:40,459 --> 00:17:42,860
Yeah, but... don't...
don't leave me alone!
455
00:17:42,895 --> 00:17:45,694
I eat when I'm scared!
456
00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:50,066
(whimpering, muffled mumbling)
457
00:17:53,573 --> 00:17:54,939
Mm, shrimp.
458
00:17:54,974 --> 00:17:56,943
(rock music playing)
459
00:17:56,976 --> 00:18:00,936
Let's make some noise!
460
00:18:00,980 --> 00:18:01,640
(horrified gasp)
461
00:18:01,681 --> 00:18:02,979
I say Holy,
462
00:18:03,015 --> 00:18:03,983
you say Ghost.
463
00:18:04,016 --> 00:18:05,279
Holy! CROWD: Ghost!
464
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:05,944
Holy!
465
00:18:05,985 --> 00:18:07,009
Ghost!
466
00:18:07,053 --> 00:18:08,385
♪ The Lord is my Shepherd ♪
467
00:18:08,421 --> 00:18:09,946
♪ I shall not want ♪
468
00:18:09,989 --> 00:18:12,254
♪ He makes me lie
down in green pastures ♪
469
00:18:12,291 --> 00:18:13,657
They're green, y'all!
470
00:18:13,693 --> 00:18:16,185
♪ He leads me
beside the still waters ♪
471
00:18:16,228 --> 00:18:17,457
♪ He restores my soul ♪
472
00:18:17,496 --> 00:18:19,260
Aw-yeah!
473
00:18:22,168 --> 00:18:23,466
Amen!
474
00:18:23,502 --> 00:18:24,970
(cheering)
475
00:18:25,004 --> 00:18:26,097
(gasps)
476
00:18:28,007 --> 00:18:30,272
Dad, we're in the
middle of the show!
477
00:18:30,309 --> 00:18:31,743
Well, I hope you enjoyed it,
478
00:18:31,777 --> 00:18:34,474
'cause it's the last time
you're leaving your room
479
00:18:34,513 --> 00:18:35,537
until you graduate.
480
00:18:35,581 --> 00:18:36,708
Now, let's go.
481
00:18:36,749 --> 00:18:38,183
(cheering)
482
00:18:38,217 --> 00:18:40,550
Hey, what's up? We
still have another set.
483
00:18:40,586 --> 00:18:42,316
I'm taking my son home.
484
00:18:42,355 --> 00:18:43,846
I can't believe you, Dad.
485
00:18:43,889 --> 00:18:46,620
You're embarrassing
me in front of the pastor!
486
00:18:46,659 --> 00:18:48,287
Mr. Hill, you just don't get it.
487
00:18:48,327 --> 00:18:49,886
This is how we testify.
488
00:18:49,929 --> 00:18:51,625
(yelling, singing):
♪ Praise him! ♪
489
00:18:51,664 --> 00:18:53,064
(shudders)
490
00:18:53,099 --> 00:18:55,398
Can't you see you're not
making Christianity better?
491
00:18:55,434 --> 00:18:57,665
You're just making
rock and roll worse.
492
00:18:57,703 --> 00:18:59,171
You people are all the same.
493
00:18:59,205 --> 00:19:01,231
You look at us and
think we're freaks.
494
00:19:01,273 --> 00:19:03,139
Come on, even
Jesus had long hair.
495
00:19:03,175 --> 00:19:05,269
Only because I wasn't his dad.
496
00:19:05,311 --> 00:19:07,303
Is there a problem here, K?
497
00:19:07,346 --> 00:19:08,439
Yeah, Pop.
498
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:10,575
This dude won't let
Bobby praise J.C.
499
00:19:10,616 --> 00:19:11,982
And he's ruining my show.
500
00:19:12,885 --> 00:19:14,319
Look, I just want my son
501
00:19:14,353 --> 00:19:15,685
back in regular church
502
00:19:15,721 --> 00:19:18,384
obeying his normal
parents and acting right.
503
00:19:18,424 --> 00:19:20,518
See, Pop, he's holding him back.
504
00:19:20,559 --> 00:19:22,027
What're you doing, Kevin?
505
00:19:22,061 --> 00:19:23,859
You forgot Number Five.
506
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:24,896
Huh?
507
00:19:28,734 --> 00:19:31,363
Never come between
a kid and his dad.
508
00:19:31,404 --> 00:19:35,500
If the man doesn't want his
boy praising like you, it's cool.
509
00:19:35,541 --> 00:19:37,237
Yeah, but... Now
go finish your show
510
00:19:37,276 --> 00:19:39,370
before they start
mashing out of anger
511
00:19:39,412 --> 00:19:41,278
instead of jubilation.
512
00:19:41,313 --> 00:19:42,440
Fine.
513
00:19:42,481 --> 00:19:44,040
Sorry about that, friend.
514
00:19:44,083 --> 00:19:45,517
Oh, that's okay.
515
00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:48,146
I got to admit, when you
first walked up I didn't think
516
00:19:48,187 --> 00:19:50,315
you and I were going
to be on the same page.
517
00:19:50,356 --> 00:19:52,052
I feel where you're coming from.
518
00:19:52,091 --> 00:19:53,389
Teenagers.
519
00:19:53,426 --> 00:19:54,426
Amen.
520
00:19:55,561 --> 00:19:56,893
Let's go, Bobby.
521
00:20:02,068 --> 00:20:04,162
You can give me the
stink eye all you want,
522
00:20:04,203 --> 00:20:06,104
but it's not going
to change anything.
523
00:20:06,138 --> 00:20:07,629
Fine. But when I'm 18,
524
00:20:07,673 --> 00:20:10,905
I'm going to do whatever
I want for the Lord.
525
00:20:10,943 --> 00:20:13,742
Tattoos, piercings, the works.
526
00:20:13,779 --> 00:20:15,714
Well, I'll take that chance.
527
00:20:15,748 --> 00:20:18,183
Come here, there's
something I want to show you.
528
00:20:21,053 --> 00:20:23,215
Remember this?
529
00:20:23,255 --> 00:20:24,689
My Bean Bag Buddy?
530
00:20:24,724 --> 00:20:28,320
Oh, man, I can't believe
I collected those things.
531
00:20:28,360 --> 00:20:29,521
They're so lame.
532
00:20:29,562 --> 00:20:32,430
You didn't think
so five years ago.
533
00:20:32,465 --> 00:20:34,434
And how about your virtual pet?
534
00:20:34,467 --> 00:20:36,231
You used to carry
this thing everywhere.
535
00:20:36,268 --> 00:20:37,429
Then you got tired of it,
536
00:20:37,470 --> 00:20:39,371
forgot to feed it, and it died.
537
00:20:39,405 --> 00:20:43,274
I look like such a dork.
538
00:20:43,309 --> 00:20:44,868
I know how you feel.
539
00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:46,708
(laughs)
540
00:20:46,746 --> 00:20:49,215
I never thought that
Members Only jacket
541
00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:50,443
would go out of style.
542
00:20:50,483 --> 00:20:51,974
But it did.
543
00:20:52,017 --> 00:20:54,680
I know you think that stuff
you're doing now is cool,
544
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:57,315
but in a few years you're
gonna think it's lame.
545
00:20:57,356 --> 00:20:58,722
And I don't want the, uh,
546
00:20:58,758 --> 00:21:02,092
Lord to, uh, you know,
end up in this box.
547
00:21:03,562 --> 00:21:04,723
I got you, Dad.
548
00:21:07,967 --> 00:21:09,833
Hey, what's this picture?
549
00:21:09,869 --> 00:21:12,805
Mom used to have blond hair?
550
00:21:12,838 --> 00:21:16,206
HANK: Farrah Fawcett
was very popular back then.
551
00:21:16,242 --> 00:21:20,873
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
552
00:21:53,879 --> 00:21:56,474
HANK: You know
what's not cool? Hell.