1
00:00:06,990 --> 00:00:13,123
Captioning sponsored by FOX
BROADCASTING COMPANY
2
00:00:13,163 --> 00:00:19,125
and TWENTIETH
CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
3
00:00:33,050 --> 00:00:34,518
Q-bag.
4
00:00:35,686 --> 00:00:36,686
Q-bod.
5
00:00:36,753 --> 00:00:39,086
No, man. Looks like
dang ol' "Mogmo."
6
00:00:39,189 --> 00:00:41,351
I'm not even going
to give this animal
7
00:00:41,391 --> 00:00:43,917
the satisfaction
of trying to read it.
8
00:00:43,961 --> 00:00:45,293
That's just what he wants.
9
00:00:45,329 --> 00:00:47,389
One day you're
living in paradise.
10
00:00:47,431 --> 00:00:49,866
Next day, it's a
crime-ridden slum.
11
00:00:49,900 --> 00:00:52,927
Society's going to
hell in a handbasket.
12
00:00:52,970 --> 00:00:55,303
I blame the media-blamers.
13
00:00:57,407 --> 00:01:01,572
And one more thing, people.
14
00:01:01,612 --> 00:01:05,014
K-107 is sponsoring
this year's science fair
15
00:01:05,048 --> 00:01:08,280
which now will be known
as "Rock the Science."
16
00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,287
The winner gets to
present their findings
17
00:01:10,320 --> 00:01:12,846
to Easy Ed and the Chicken Boy.
18
00:01:14,625 --> 00:01:15,593
Dude, you want to be my partner
19
00:01:15,626 --> 00:01:16,753
for the science fair?
20
00:01:16,793 --> 00:01:18,762
I found a dead
bird in my backyard
21
00:01:18,795 --> 00:01:20,764
we could probably
do something with.
22
00:01:20,797 --> 00:01:21,765
Thanks, Joseph
23
00:01:21,798 --> 00:01:23,960
but I'd like to increase
my chances of winning
24
00:01:24,001 --> 00:01:26,266
and decrease my
chances of working.
25
00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:28,898
Hey, Connie, want to
be my science partner?
26
00:01:28,939 --> 00:01:29,907
That'd be great!
27
00:01:29,940 --> 00:01:32,500
I've got about 50 awesome ideas.
28
00:01:32,542 --> 00:01:35,102
Well, 57 if we're
allowed to use radium.
29
00:01:35,145 --> 00:01:41,551
I'll e-mail them to you tonight.
30
00:01:41,585 --> 00:01:43,611
Why are you trying to
get back together with her?
31
00:01:43,654 --> 00:01:45,350
What? I'm not.
32
00:01:45,389 --> 00:01:47,290
It's just a science project.
33
00:01:47,324 --> 00:01:49,418
It's not like we're
in a play together.
34
00:01:49,459 --> 00:01:51,519
Dude, she might be
thinking something else.
35
00:01:51,561 --> 00:01:54,087
When she walked out of the
room, she looked back at you.
36
00:01:54,131 --> 00:01:55,141
I think you've been reading
37
00:01:55,165 --> 00:01:57,760
too many of your
dad's romance novels.
38
00:01:57,801 --> 00:02:00,896
Why else would the
smartest girl in class
39
00:02:00,937 --> 00:02:02,132
want to work with you?
40
00:02:02,172 --> 00:02:04,835
You made sun tea for
last year's science project.
41
00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:10,837
Uh-oh.
42
00:02:16,153 --> 00:02:17,153
Damn vandal.
43
00:02:17,187 --> 00:02:18,815
This'll probably take us hours
44
00:02:18,855 --> 00:02:21,120
between the joking
around and the horseplay.
45
00:02:21,158 --> 00:02:22,854
And the beer runs.
46
00:02:22,893 --> 00:02:24,555
Look, we're all upset
47
00:02:24,594 --> 00:02:26,688
but this guy hasn't
licked me yet.
48
00:02:26,730 --> 00:02:27,857
This is going to be cool.
49
00:02:27,898 --> 00:02:31,460
Here we go.
50
00:02:34,771 --> 00:02:36,831
That was fast.
51
00:02:36,873 --> 00:02:38,239
You missed a spot.
52
00:02:38,275 --> 00:02:39,140
I did?
53
00:02:39,176 --> 00:02:40,405
No, man, he didn't.
54
00:02:40,444 --> 00:02:42,913
Like a dang ol' shadow.
55
00:02:42,946 --> 00:02:44,938
I got to let her down easy.
56
00:02:44,981 --> 00:02:46,779
Normally, I'd start with a joke
57
00:02:46,817 --> 00:02:49,719
but that's how she fell
for me in the first place.
58
00:02:49,753 --> 00:02:51,722
You know what
might soften the blow?
59
00:02:51,755 --> 00:02:53,724
Tell her I've always
been into her.
60
00:02:53,757 --> 00:02:55,851
And that I always stare at
her not because I'm creepy
61
00:02:55,892 --> 00:02:57,087
but because I'm deep.
62
00:02:57,127 --> 00:03:02,225
I'll do what I can.
63
00:03:02,265 --> 00:03:05,292
Hey, partner.
64
00:03:10,474 --> 00:03:11,474
Connie?
65
00:03:11,508 --> 00:03:12,508
Whoa.
66
00:03:12,542 --> 00:03:16,707
I knew you weren't
wearing slutty lipstick.
67
00:03:16,747 --> 00:03:17,715
Huh?
68
00:03:17,748 --> 00:03:18,791
I just got flipped by this girl
69
00:03:18,815 --> 00:03:19,908
who looked kind of like you
70
00:03:19,950 --> 00:03:21,919
but she was dressed
like a teenager.
71
00:03:21,952 --> 00:03:25,184
Ugh! That's Tid Pao,
my cousin from L.A.
72
00:03:25,222 --> 00:03:26,918
She's sleeping in my room.
73
00:03:26,957 --> 00:03:28,118
L.A.?
74
00:03:28,158 --> 00:03:30,320
She was so in my
face, I thought New York
75
00:03:30,360 --> 00:03:33,762
but L.A. is even better.
76
00:03:33,797 --> 00:03:34,526
Hey
77
00:03:34,564 --> 00:03:35,998
ain't you the fat kid
who jumped me?
78
00:03:36,032 --> 00:03:37,364
Yes, yes, I am.
79
00:03:37,401 --> 00:03:38,528
Bobby Hill.
80
00:03:38,568 --> 00:03:45,600
So, Tid Pao, how long
you going to be here
81
00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:46,610
on the Third Coast?
82
00:03:46,643 --> 00:03:47,667
Till I ain't.
83
00:03:47,711 --> 00:03:49,680
She's here for the
rest of the semester.
84
00:03:49,713 --> 00:03:51,409
Not that anyone asked me.
85
00:03:51,448 --> 00:03:53,917
And while you're here,
stop attacking people.
86
00:03:53,950 --> 00:03:56,283
This isn't L.A. where
"anything goes."
87
00:03:56,319 --> 00:03:58,481
Where it's cool to take
me to Knott's Berry Farm
88
00:03:58,522 --> 00:04:00,787
and totally ditch me.
89
00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:02,019
Whoa, sorry, I didn't know
90
00:04:02,058 --> 00:04:04,186
I was smacking
down your boyfriend.
91
00:04:04,227 --> 00:04:05,752
Uh, boyfriend?
92
00:04:05,796 --> 00:04:06,764
Well...
93
00:04:06,797 --> 00:04:07,765
Well, he's... uh...
94
00:04:07,798 --> 00:04:09,460
I'm not!
95
00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,263
We're just science partners.
96
00:04:11,301 --> 00:04:12,462
Nothing more.
97
00:04:12,502 --> 00:04:13,697
Peace.
98
00:04:13,737 --> 00:04:14,737
Catch you later.
99
00:04:14,771 --> 00:04:17,331
"Catch you later's" still
a cool phrase, isn't it?
100
00:04:17,374 --> 00:04:19,240
I mean, have you ever used it?
101
00:04:19,276 --> 00:04:20,244
No.
102
00:04:20,277 --> 00:04:21,677
Okay. Whew.
103
00:04:21,711 --> 00:04:24,112
Everybody, we
have a new student:
104
00:04:24,147 --> 00:04:25,376
Tid Pao.
105
00:04:25,415 --> 00:04:27,384
Now, I know there
are a number of ways
106
00:04:27,417 --> 00:04:28,316
we can make fun of her name
107
00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:29,842
like "Kung Pao"
108
00:04:29,886 --> 00:04:34,119
or I suppose "Tid Poo,"
so let's have none of that.
109
00:04:34,157 --> 00:04:37,491
So, do you enjoy exploring
the mysterious world of science?
110
00:04:37,527 --> 00:04:38,495
Do you?
111
00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,496
Uh... yes.
112
00:04:39,529 --> 00:04:42,931
Did you see how she
turned it around on him?
113
00:04:42,966 --> 00:04:45,663
Okay, Tid Pao
will need a partner
114
00:04:45,702 --> 00:04:47,193
for the science fair.
115
00:04:47,237 --> 00:04:49,570
I assume Joseph is available.
116
00:04:49,606 --> 00:04:50,665
I don't want Tid Pao.
117
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:51,936
I want Connie.
118
00:04:51,975 --> 00:04:53,034
You want Tid Pao.
119
00:04:53,076 --> 00:04:55,443
That whole family is hot.
120
00:04:55,479 --> 00:04:57,846
We could do something
with photosynthesis
121
00:04:57,881 --> 00:04:59,816
but that's not very sexy.
122
00:04:59,850 --> 00:05:02,217
And of course,
mitochondrial cell swapping
123
00:05:02,252 --> 00:05:04,221
has been done to death.
124
00:05:04,254 --> 00:05:06,985
Connie, I think we
should switch partners.
125
00:05:07,023 --> 00:05:07,991
What?!
126
00:05:08,024 --> 00:05:10,186
You asked me to be your partner
127
00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:12,594
and now you're blowing me off?
128
00:05:12,629 --> 00:05:13,597
Great.
129
00:05:13,630 --> 00:05:14,598
Fine.
130
00:05:14,631 --> 00:05:15,599
You and Joseph have fun.
131
00:05:15,632 --> 00:05:17,601
So what's it going to
be, paper airplanes?
132
00:05:17,634 --> 00:05:18,863
How a rock works?
133
00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:20,768
Actually...
134
00:05:20,804 --> 00:05:22,534
I want to work with Tid Pao.
135
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:25,542
But she's just a
stuck-up wiseass
136
00:05:25,575 --> 00:05:28,010
who wears too much makeup.
137
00:05:28,044 --> 00:05:29,945
And the real reason
138
00:05:29,980 --> 00:05:32,950
her parents made her leave L.A.
139
00:05:32,983 --> 00:05:35,919
is because her
grades are slipping.
140
00:05:35,952 --> 00:05:37,545
That's right, slipping.
141
00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:39,681
So, she's not book-smart.
142
00:05:39,723 --> 00:05:42,124
She gets an "A" in cool.
143
00:05:45,662 --> 00:05:47,358
Hi, science partner.
144
00:05:47,397 --> 00:05:50,265
You want to see my dead bird?
145
00:05:50,300 --> 00:05:51,495
Man, I hate it here.
146
00:05:51,535 --> 00:05:53,094
I just want to come home.
147
00:05:53,136 --> 00:05:54,934
Too soon, Q-Bag.
148
00:05:54,971 --> 00:05:56,132
Know what I'm saying?
149
00:05:56,172 --> 00:05:58,141
The Olvera Street
Queens still going off
150
00:05:58,174 --> 00:05:59,938
about that kilo you stole.
151
00:05:59,976 --> 00:06:01,842
Yo, just stay away, yo.
152
00:06:01,878 --> 00:06:05,747
Yeah, maybe I should give
back what I took from them.
153
00:06:05,782 --> 00:06:07,751
Where you going to
cop that much meth?
154
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,753
You don't know any
dealers down there.
155
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:12,119
I guess I'll have to
cook it up myself.
156
00:06:12,155 --> 00:06:14,124
I just got to get ahold
of the equipment.
157
00:06:14,157 --> 00:06:15,557
You better be careful, girl.
158
00:06:15,592 --> 00:06:19,393
People probably
got their eye on you.
159
00:06:19,429 --> 00:06:20,795
No sweat.
160
00:06:20,830 --> 00:06:22,799
I can con one of
these inbred hicks
161
00:06:22,832 --> 00:06:24,596
to do my dirty work for me.
162
00:06:24,634 --> 00:06:25,693
Hi.
163
00:06:25,735 --> 00:06:27,328
Hold on.
164
00:06:27,370 --> 00:06:29,862
Yo, Cleo, that hot dude
from next door is here.
165
00:06:29,906 --> 00:06:31,841
Call you back.
166
00:06:31,875 --> 00:06:34,868
Will you be my
science fair partner?
167
00:06:34,911 --> 00:06:37,938
Science partners, huh?
168
00:06:37,981 --> 00:06:39,882
Sounds cool.
169
00:06:39,916 --> 00:06:41,646
All right!
170
00:06:41,685 --> 00:06:44,018
I mean... 'Sup?
171
00:06:48,325 --> 00:06:51,784
See? I was right. It's Q-Bag.
172
00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:53,797
There's the "Q," and
that's clearly "bag."
173
00:06:53,830 --> 00:06:55,492
Gentlemen
174
00:06:55,532 --> 00:06:58,366
I believe I've solved
our graffiti problem.
175
00:06:58,401 --> 00:07:01,462
We build a protective
razor-wire-topped fence
176
00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:04,702
around our existing fence.
177
00:07:05,742 --> 00:07:06,710
Dang it, Dale...
178
00:07:06,743 --> 00:07:07,711
that's genius.
179
00:07:07,744 --> 00:07:08,712
Indeed.
180
00:07:08,745 --> 00:07:11,340
I will use a salami to simulate
181
00:07:11,381 --> 00:07:14,283
what this stuff will
do to a vandal's arm.
182
00:07:14,317 --> 00:07:15,285
Hmm.
183
00:07:15,318 --> 00:07:18,846
We need a real arm. Bill?
184
00:07:18,888 --> 00:07:22,791
Hey, Tid Pao
185
00:07:22,826 --> 00:07:26,695
I've been, uh
186
00:07:29,733 --> 00:07:32,897
jamming on some
science fair ideas.
187
00:07:32,936 --> 00:07:36,168
I've got some notions
involving goggles
188
00:07:36,206 --> 00:07:38,266
and some kind of beaker.
189
00:07:38,308 --> 00:07:39,308
Why don't we get together
190
00:07:39,342 --> 00:07:41,311
tonight for a
brainstorming session?
191
00:07:41,344 --> 00:07:42,471
See where it takes us.
192
00:07:42,512 --> 00:07:45,038
Don't worry about it.
193
00:07:45,081 --> 00:07:48,245
I already got an idea.
194
00:07:48,284 --> 00:07:49,252
Awesome.
195
00:07:49,285 --> 00:07:52,744
I'll pick you up at 7:00.
196
00:07:52,789 --> 00:07:55,190
Luann, you're the
hippest person I know.
197
00:07:55,225 --> 00:07:58,662
I need to take Tid Pao
someplace that's not boring.
198
00:07:58,695 --> 00:08:00,561
You know, sophisticated
199
00:08:00,597 --> 00:08:03,032
but close enough
that I can ride my bike.
200
00:08:03,066 --> 00:08:06,298
Okay. Um... you
know what's exciting?
201
00:08:06,336 --> 00:08:10,467
That place where you bet
on which chicken is madder.
202
00:08:10,507 --> 00:08:11,873
I could not help overhearing
203
00:08:11,908 --> 00:08:15,003
and I cannot help
making some suggestions.
204
00:08:15,045 --> 00:08:16,013
Here's what to do.
205
00:08:16,046 --> 00:08:17,708
The Pioneer Women's Museum.
206
00:08:17,747 --> 00:08:21,912
Mom, I'm looking
for cool, not lame.
207
00:08:21,951 --> 00:08:23,214
Lame? Well, maybe
208
00:08:23,253 --> 00:08:25,586
if you think it's "lame"
to spend an evening
209
00:08:25,622 --> 00:08:28,251
with costumes and artifacts
used by our foremothers.
210
00:08:28,291 --> 00:08:31,591
I bet you thought
we were too hick
211
00:08:31,628 --> 00:08:32,857
to have sushi in Arlen.
212
00:08:32,896 --> 00:08:35,695
And a year ago, you
would have been right.
213
00:08:35,732 --> 00:08:37,291
Salmon's almost defrosted
214
00:08:37,333 --> 00:08:38,494
so it'll be just a sec.
215
00:08:38,535 --> 00:08:41,903
Your fries are ready, though.
216
00:08:45,141 --> 00:08:47,133
Yo, man, this tuna's from a can.
217
00:08:47,177 --> 00:08:50,773
I got it, Carl.
218
00:08:50,814 --> 00:08:53,409
Maybe we should
go roller-skating.
219
00:08:53,450 --> 00:08:56,750
My mother clipped
a coupon for me.
220
00:08:58,254 --> 00:08:59,222
Um...
221
00:08:59,255 --> 00:09:01,224
Oh, no!
222
00:09:01,257 --> 00:09:04,227
They're after us!
223
00:09:05,762 --> 00:09:09,460
This is crap, isn't it?
224
00:09:09,499 --> 00:09:10,967
The crappiest.
225
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:11,968
Ooh
226
00:09:12,001 --> 00:09:15,438
I don't think you're supposed
227
00:09:15,472 --> 00:09:18,442
to touch the women.
228
00:09:18,475 --> 00:09:20,671
Got boogs?!
229
00:09:24,447 --> 00:09:31,149
I think the cow wants
to milk Grandma.
230
00:09:32,689 --> 00:09:36,649
You know what we
should do for our project?
231
00:09:36,693 --> 00:09:38,628
Find out how boys like Bobby
232
00:09:38,661 --> 00:09:40,027
could possibly be interested
233
00:09:40,063 --> 00:09:42,498
in some street
trash like Tid Pao.
234
00:09:42,532 --> 00:09:47,129
You know, if you're tired,
you could crash here.
235
00:09:47,170 --> 00:09:50,402
Oh, Joseph, I really don't want
236
00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:52,875
to get into this again.
237
00:09:52,909 --> 00:09:53,877
Joseph!
238
00:09:53,910 --> 00:09:58,871
Joseph, don't forget to
do the yawn and stretch.
239
00:10:01,117 --> 00:10:04,485
Uh.
240
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:08,219
Hey, check this out.
241
00:10:08,258 --> 00:10:10,727
You're the one doing that?
242
00:10:10,760 --> 00:10:12,319
My dad keeps having to sandblast
243
00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:14,957
restain and lacquer it off.
244
00:10:14,998 --> 00:10:16,523
He's the one doing that?
245
00:10:16,566 --> 00:10:17,795
You've got to understand.
246
00:10:17,834 --> 00:10:19,427
He doesn't even approve
247
00:10:19,469 --> 00:10:20,835
of bumper stickers.
248
00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:28,004
Yeah, but you're cooler
than that, aren't you?
249
00:10:28,044 --> 00:10:31,537
Give me that can.
250
00:10:31,581 --> 00:10:32,549
Hmm.
251
00:10:32,582 --> 00:10:36,019
Check it out, girl.
252
00:10:36,052 --> 00:10:37,816
I'm representing!
253
00:10:37,854 --> 00:10:39,618
Q-Bag!
254
00:10:39,656 --> 00:10:41,386
Painterer! You
255
00:10:41,424 --> 00:10:43,188
inside now.
256
00:10:43,226 --> 00:10:45,695
Dang it, Bobby.
257
00:10:45,728 --> 00:10:46,728
Your mother and I
258
00:10:46,763 --> 00:10:49,255
took our wedding photos
in front of that fence.
259
00:10:49,299 --> 00:10:52,030
Man, I'm just
keepin' it real, dawg.
260
00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:54,765
You'd never make it in L.A.
261
00:10:54,804 --> 00:10:57,535
I hope I never make it to L.A.
262
00:10:57,574 --> 00:10:58,574
I could make it in L.A.
263
00:10:58,608 --> 00:11:00,873
I just have very fair skin.
264
00:11:00,910 --> 00:11:03,004
My dermatologist says it
would be a death sentence.
265
00:11:03,046 --> 00:11:04,014
What's that?
266
00:11:04,047 --> 00:11:06,016
I'm sorry, Mom,
I-I couldn't hear you
267
00:11:06,049 --> 00:11:07,449
over the crickets and banjos.
268
00:11:07,483 --> 00:11:10,214
Mister, if you think
you're in a small town now
269
00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:12,484
you're about to be
mayor of your room
270
00:11:12,522 --> 00:11:14,582
for a few months,
I tell you what.
271
00:11:14,624 --> 00:11:16,820
And stay away from that Tid Pao.
272
00:11:16,860 --> 00:11:19,022
And don't think I
can't tell the difference
273
00:11:19,062 --> 00:11:21,588
between her and
Connie because I can.
274
00:11:21,631 --> 00:11:22,997
I swear to your father
275
00:11:23,032 --> 00:11:24,364
I keep you out of trouble
276
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,369
and now you get
mixed up with Bobby Hill!
277
00:11:26,402 --> 00:11:28,633
What is it with you
beautiful Asian girls
278
00:11:28,671 --> 00:11:30,731
and that stupid redneck boy?!
279
00:11:30,773 --> 00:11:33,265
Why so self-destructive?
280
00:11:33,309 --> 00:11:34,436
Low self-esteem?
281
00:11:34,477 --> 00:11:36,946
Uh, long distance.
282
00:11:36,980 --> 00:11:38,471
You use calling card?
283
00:11:38,514 --> 00:11:40,449
Of course not.
284
00:11:40,483 --> 00:11:42,281
Yeah, the stuff will
be ready by next week.
285
00:11:42,318 --> 00:11:44,947
I just got to sell it, then
book it back to Cali.
286
00:11:44,988 --> 00:11:46,866
I'll bring you a little
extra for your birthday.
287
00:11:46,890 --> 00:11:48,381
Aw...
288
00:11:48,424 --> 00:11:50,484
Clear your calendars
289
00:11:50,526 --> 00:11:52,051
open-cockpit biplane fans.
290
00:11:52,095 --> 00:11:53,529
This weekend is the dedication
291
00:11:53,563 --> 00:11:55,555
of Arlen Airfield's
new wind sock.
292
00:12:11,147 --> 00:12:13,548
Yo, Tid Pao
293
00:12:13,583 --> 00:12:15,245
my dad said I couldn't see you
294
00:12:15,285 --> 00:12:17,777
and I just said, "Chill, Hank.
295
00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:20,221
You don't tell me what..."
296
00:12:20,256 --> 00:12:21,690
Close the door!
297
00:12:21,724 --> 00:12:25,092
Oh, crap! Did my dad see me?!
298
00:12:25,128 --> 00:12:27,688
Whoa. My dad said that
you're a bad influence
299
00:12:27,730 --> 00:12:30,859
and here you got half our
science fair project done.
300
00:12:30,900 --> 00:12:31,868
What are we making?
301
00:12:31,901 --> 00:12:33,665
It's a... candy machine.
302
00:12:33,703 --> 00:12:34,671
All right!
303
00:12:34,704 --> 00:12:38,266
Hard candy, chewy candy,
sticky candy, gummy candy?
304
00:12:38,308 --> 00:12:39,276
Just candy.
305
00:12:39,309 --> 00:12:40,277
Interesting. Interesting.
306
00:12:40,310 --> 00:12:43,769
So, what's the filling...
Caramel, nougat, nuts, jelly?
307
00:12:43,813 --> 00:12:46,078
You ready to help me?
308
00:12:46,115 --> 00:12:47,083
Anything, partner.
309
00:12:47,116 --> 00:12:51,076
Yo, your dad works at
a propane place, right?
310
00:12:51,120 --> 00:12:53,089
Yeah, I'm going to
need, like, four tanks.
311
00:12:53,122 --> 00:12:54,818
Uh, I don't know.
312
00:12:54,857 --> 00:12:57,292
As soon as I ask him, he'll
want to know what it's for
313
00:12:57,327 --> 00:12:59,762
and when your name
comes up, no go.
314
00:12:59,796 --> 00:13:02,994
Then don't ask him.
315
00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:04,591
But...
316
00:13:13,509 --> 00:13:16,707
Sometimes I overthink.
317
00:13:19,349 --> 00:13:21,750
Can you believe the sass
coming out of his mouth?
318
00:13:21,784 --> 00:13:23,753
And now it's on my fence.
319
00:13:23,786 --> 00:13:24,879
Oh, come on, Hank.
320
00:13:24,921 --> 00:13:26,890
He's just trying
to impress a girl.
321
00:13:26,923 --> 00:13:28,915
Remember how when
we were first dating
322
00:13:28,958 --> 00:13:31,359
you used to run up
the down escalators?
323
00:13:31,394 --> 00:13:32,362
Yeah, well
324
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:35,627
at least he was using paint.
325
00:13:39,502 --> 00:13:41,733
This is your dad's job?
326
00:13:41,771 --> 00:13:43,797
This place stinks.
327
00:13:43,840 --> 00:13:46,571
Uh, yeah, you think that's bad?
328
00:13:46,609 --> 00:13:48,805
You should get a
whiff of his overalls.
329
00:13:48,845 --> 00:13:49,778
Most of his customers
330
00:13:49,812 --> 00:13:51,678
pay him in manure.
331
00:13:51,714 --> 00:13:53,910
We're going to
need two more tanks.
332
00:13:53,950 --> 00:13:56,181
But these were the
only little ones outside.
333
00:13:56,219 --> 00:13:58,950
So, get some from inside.
334
00:13:58,988 --> 00:14:00,889
You've already
jacked his key chain.
335
00:14:00,923 --> 00:14:03,154
What's the biggie?
336
00:14:03,192 --> 00:14:07,129
Oh...
337
00:14:11,701 --> 00:14:15,866
Just going to
grab a soda, fellas.
338
00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:46,629
Morning, Joe Jack.
339
00:14:46,669 --> 00:14:48,399
Morning, Enrique.
340
00:14:48,438 --> 00:14:54,639
Morning, darlin'.
341
00:14:54,677 --> 00:14:56,737
Oh, my God!
342
00:14:56,779 --> 00:14:58,748
Mr. Strickland,
we've been robbed!
343
00:14:58,781 --> 00:15:04,220
No, no, it all got spent on
coffee yesterday. Honest.
344
00:15:04,253 --> 00:15:08,987
What the hell is
going on in this town?
345
00:15:09,025 --> 00:15:11,961
First kids are
spray-painting fences.
346
00:15:11,994 --> 00:15:14,463
Now someone is stealing propane.
347
00:15:14,497 --> 00:15:17,990
I can understand wanting
propane so bad you could steal it
348
00:15:18,034 --> 00:15:20,299
but to actually
go through with it?
349
00:15:20,336 --> 00:15:21,599
What kind of sicko
350
00:15:21,637 --> 00:15:23,162
would do that?
351
00:15:24,207 --> 00:15:26,176
Well, the propane
is under my watch
352
00:15:26,209 --> 00:15:27,541
so, it's coming out of my pay.
353
00:15:27,577 --> 00:15:31,412
I was thinking maybe
354
00:15:31,447 --> 00:15:33,541
we can sell our
first batch of candy
355
00:15:33,583 --> 00:15:35,552
and use the money
to repay my dad.
356
00:15:35,585 --> 00:15:39,215
Also, I was thinking we
could call them Bobby Ruths.
357
00:15:39,255 --> 00:15:40,223
Forget that.
358
00:15:40,256 --> 00:15:44,318
I need you to jack us
some cough syrup, yo.
359
00:15:44,360 --> 00:15:46,886
You know, to finish our project.
360
00:15:46,929 --> 00:15:47,897
More stealing?
361
00:15:47,930 --> 00:15:50,866
Yeah, we got heavy into
that in the sixth grade.
362
00:15:50,900 --> 00:15:52,630
It's kind of played out.
363
00:15:52,668 --> 00:15:55,297
Now we're into asking
our parents for the money
364
00:15:55,338 --> 00:15:57,671
and explaining what it's for.
365
00:15:59,275 --> 00:16:03,212
Yeah, that's what's cool now.
366
00:16:03,246 --> 00:16:05,613
Come on, Q-Bob.
367
00:16:05,648 --> 00:16:07,640
Uh, I got five bucks.
368
00:16:07,683 --> 00:16:10,050
We can go buy a bottle
of children's cherry.
369
00:16:10,086 --> 00:16:13,853
Man, you are so weak.
370
00:16:13,890 --> 00:16:19,955
I'll meet you here
before the science fair.
371
00:16:19,996 --> 00:16:23,899
I mean, the science fizz-air.
372
00:16:23,933 --> 00:16:25,265
Check out this machine we made.
373
00:16:25,301 --> 00:16:26,701
It picks up radio signals.
374
00:16:28,538 --> 00:16:29,597
It's an incubator, Joseph.
375
00:16:29,639 --> 00:16:31,870
I had the radio on in my room
376
00:16:31,908 --> 00:16:32,876
while I was making it.
377
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,377
Then does music just...?
378
00:16:34,410 --> 00:16:37,278
So, Bobby, where's
your cool girlfriend?
379
00:16:37,313 --> 00:16:41,876
She'll be here. Don't
you worry about that.
380
00:16:49,325 --> 00:16:50,452
Mom, the science
381
00:16:50,493 --> 00:16:51,493
fair's today.
382
00:16:51,527 --> 00:16:52,961
I need some cough syrup.
383
00:16:52,995 --> 00:16:54,588
Are you trying to play sick?
384
00:16:54,630 --> 00:16:56,531
Because I will have
a thermometer in you
385
00:16:56,566 --> 00:16:57,829
before you can sit down.
386
00:16:57,867 --> 00:17:00,803
No, no, I want to go to school
and win that science fair.
387
00:17:00,836 --> 00:17:02,168
And when I come home
388
00:17:02,205 --> 00:17:06,074
the only thing I'm putting on
Dad's fence is a blue ribbon.
389
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,440
Or a Chicken Boy T-shirt.
390
00:17:07,476 --> 00:17:10,173
I don't remember
what the prizes were.
391
00:17:10,213 --> 00:17:14,048
I'll be honest with you.
392
00:17:14,083 --> 00:17:15,093
I'm a little uncomfortable
393
00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:17,086
buying such a large
quantity of zoom
394
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:18,678
from a 13-year-old girl.
395
00:17:18,721 --> 00:17:21,247
Please, mister, could
I just get the deposit?
396
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:23,259
I'm late for a Girl
Scout meeting.
397
00:17:23,292 --> 00:17:25,989
Don't you cross me, little girl.
398
00:17:26,028 --> 00:17:27,724
Just made my deal.
399
00:17:27,763 --> 00:17:31,222
It'll be enough to pay back
the Olvera Street Queens
400
00:17:31,267 --> 00:17:34,169
and fly back to
Cali first class.
401
00:17:34,203 --> 00:17:36,638
Your punk ass picking
me up at the airport?
402
00:17:36,672 --> 00:17:38,072
Great, thanks.
403
00:17:38,107 --> 00:17:42,010
Oh, this is lemon!
404
00:17:53,322 --> 00:17:56,884
You brought it here?
405
00:17:56,926 --> 00:17:59,020
God, you are one
dumb-ass pig farmer.
406
00:17:59,061 --> 00:18:00,529
What are you yelling at me for?
407
00:18:00,563 --> 00:18:02,862
I'm the one here
rocking the science.
408
00:18:02,898 --> 00:18:04,161
Now, if you're ready
409
00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:05,327
to make some candy
410
00:18:05,368 --> 00:18:08,270
hand me that brake fluid.
411
00:18:11,707 --> 00:18:12,731
What's that cop
412
00:18:12,775 --> 00:18:13,799
doing here?
413
00:18:13,843 --> 00:18:14,674
Oh, that's Mike Soto's dad.
414
00:18:14,710 --> 00:18:16,201
He's one of the judges.
415
00:18:16,245 --> 00:18:18,077
He was a substitute
science teacher
416
00:18:18,114 --> 00:18:20,913
last year while he was on
suspension from the force.
417
00:18:20,950 --> 00:18:23,886
Yo, I got two priors.
418
00:18:23,919 --> 00:18:28,220
But if you leave you
won't get any credit.
419
00:18:28,257 --> 00:18:30,055
It's all yours, man.
420
00:18:30,092 --> 00:18:32,459
Fine, more "A" s for me.
421
00:18:32,495 --> 00:18:36,296
Um, I think somebody
already did your project.
422
00:18:36,332 --> 00:18:39,166
Oh, yeah, it's right over there.
423
00:18:39,201 --> 00:18:40,931
The vending machine.
424
00:18:40,970 --> 00:18:43,201
That the best dig you got?
425
00:18:43,239 --> 00:18:46,732
Maybe you need to invent
a trash-talking machine.
426
00:18:55,518 --> 00:18:59,455
Doof! I hope this candy
tastes better than it smells.
427
00:18:59,488 --> 00:19:02,720
Oh, it's got to. It
smells like cat pee.
428
00:19:04,427 --> 00:19:07,420
Ammonia, cough
syrup, drain cleaner...
429
00:19:07,463 --> 00:19:10,023
Bobby, you're not making candy.
430
00:19:10,066 --> 00:19:13,036
Didn't you watch that MTV
special with Andy Dick?
431
00:19:13,069 --> 00:19:14,901
You're making...
432
00:19:14,937 --> 00:19:15,905
methamphetamine.
433
00:19:15,938 --> 00:19:21,400
You know... Crystal
meth, ice, crank?
434
00:19:21,444 --> 00:19:24,778
Big deal, I made
a crank machine.
435
00:19:24,814 --> 00:19:28,182
I'll just change the sign
to "How a Crank Is Made."
436
00:19:28,217 --> 00:19:30,516
Now, quit blocking
me from the judges.
437
00:19:30,553 --> 00:19:33,955
It's drugs, Bobby... The
kind you go to jail for.
438
00:19:33,989 --> 00:19:35,924
Oh, God.
439
00:19:35,958 --> 00:19:37,483
I swear I didn't know.
440
00:19:37,526 --> 00:19:38,494
She set me up.
441
00:19:38,527 --> 00:19:40,496
I'm just a
clod-hopping pig farmer
442
00:19:40,529 --> 00:19:42,521
who was too dumb to listen.
443
00:19:42,565 --> 00:19:44,591
You were so right about her.
444
00:19:44,633 --> 00:19:45,601
Yup.
445
00:19:45,634 --> 00:19:47,102
Connie, please, think.
446
00:19:47,136 --> 00:19:50,197
You got to help me.
447
00:19:50,239 --> 00:19:54,540
Hey, you wanted
excitement, you got it.
448
00:19:54,577 --> 00:19:58,275
Oh, my God, oh, my God.
449
00:19:58,314 --> 00:20:01,512
The compression
generated by the air pump
450
00:20:01,550 --> 00:20:04,281
can launch the potato
with enough force
451
00:20:04,320 --> 00:20:05,288
to go through
452
00:20:05,321 --> 00:20:07,119
a man's skull at 100 yards.
453
00:20:07,156 --> 00:20:08,124
Candy?
454
00:20:08,157 --> 00:20:11,616
Bobby, this is a
refreshing change
455
00:20:11,660 --> 00:20:15,563
from Emily's "Can
mice swim?" project.
456
00:20:15,598 --> 00:20:17,897
Turns out they
can, but not for long.
457
00:20:17,933 --> 00:20:18,901
Let me try a piece.
458
00:20:18,934 --> 00:20:19,902
No, no, no. No.
459
00:20:19,935 --> 00:20:21,733
The experiment is a failure.
460
00:20:21,771 --> 00:20:23,171
I'll take the "F", sir.
461
00:20:23,205 --> 00:20:25,674
Ooh, it's like rock candy.
462
00:20:25,708 --> 00:20:26,676
You know who has
463
00:20:26,709 --> 00:20:27,677
a sweet tooth?
464
00:20:27,710 --> 00:20:28,609
Officer Soto.
465
00:20:28,644 --> 00:20:29,873
Chad?
466
00:20:29,912 --> 00:20:32,814
No, you can't!
467
00:20:32,848 --> 00:20:34,282
It's bad! It's too sweet!
468
00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:35,409
You'll get diarrhea!
469
00:20:35,451 --> 00:20:38,580
I sneezed in it!
470
00:20:52,568 --> 00:20:56,027
W-what the heck
is wrong with you?!
471
00:20:56,071 --> 00:20:57,835
It was an accident.
472
00:20:57,873 --> 00:21:05,873
Prove it wasn't, yo.
473
00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,987
I'm the last uncle you got.
474
00:21:15,024 --> 00:21:16,617
You screw up here
475
00:21:16,659 --> 00:21:20,755
we ship you back
to Grandma in Laos.
476
00:21:26,469 --> 00:21:29,667
The yellowtail
smells a little funny
477
00:21:29,705 --> 00:21:31,674
but it all smells
kind of funny to me.
478
00:21:31,707 --> 00:21:34,006
Would you look at us...
479
00:21:34,176 --> 00:21:36,338
Chillin' in a hip
new sushi place
480
00:21:36,645 --> 00:21:38,341
right here in Arlen.
481
00:21:38,647 --> 00:21:40,172
Who needs L.A.?
482
00:21:42,251 --> 00:21:44,618
Hmm. So, this is
chicken tempura, huh?
483
00:21:46,021 --> 00:21:48,013
It's pretty good.
484
00:21:48,357 --> 00:21:51,020
Mmm, try it with the
gravy, Hank, it's... mmm.
485
00:21:53,028 --> 00:21:57,022
Domo arigato.
486
00:22:05,608 --> 00:22:11,570
Captioned by Media Access
Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org
487
00:22:29,999 --> 00:22:32,434
Man, I'm just
keepin' it real, dawg.