(TIRES SCREECH)
ANNOUNCER: And now, coming to the line,
last year's Rookie of the Year,Casey Alfonso!
In lane two,nine-time national champion, Tony Kumer.
(CROWD CHEERING)
Tony's got his light onin lane two, and now Caseyis approaching the line.
- How do you feel? - Great.
I feel like throwing up my guts.
You always feel like throwing up.
Come on, Dad. Let's get this digger on the line.
You sure you don't wanna go to law school?
- I hate lawyers! - Yeah, so do I.
Go get 'em, baby!
ANNOUNCER: Okay, looks like we're ready to go!
Let's hear it, folks!
And it's Casey Alfonso, by less thanhalf a car length!
What a spectacular finish for the young female.
Casey Alfonso, with an amazing finish.
What'd you do at the end there?
Yeah, yeah.
At about 250 feet, the car got out of shape a bit,
but about halfway down, I just got into the zone or something.
I pedaled it back into the groove. It was the coolest ride of my life.
How does it feel to be nine-time national champion...
(VOICE DISTORTS)
(CLEARS THROAT)
I'm sorry. Can you repeat that?
(VOICES DISTORTING)
Casey? Casey! Casey! Out of the way. Out of the way!
Casey! Get me an ambulance. Ron, get the ambulance! Casey?
THIRTEEN: Sixty-eight year old male, non-smoker.
Sixty-eight's a good run.
That'll leave something in the lock box for the rest of us. Next?
That's your breakfast?
Technically, it's Wilson's lunch.
Twenty-month old baby, persistent rash, fever...
Too much crying.
- Female college student with... - Too much drama.
You don't care about the crying or the drama,
'cause you won't see the patient.
And you'd treat Methuselah if his snot had an interesting color.
Means you've already decided which case you wanna take next.
Tell me about speed racer.
Female, seizure with visual and auditory processing deficiency.
I did a consult, and...
What kind of race car?
Dragster.
Continue.
You're gonna take a case based on the car she drives?
Nothing says, "Thanks for saving my life"
like a test drive in a car that accelerates faster than a space shuttle.
You can't save her life, 'cause she's not dying.
Her labs show signs of dehydration,
means the problem's just likely heatstroke.
Kind of hard to get heat struck in four and a half seconds.
Not when you're wearing a three-layer fireproof suit.
(DOOR OPENS)
Excuse me, Dr. House?
No. Lazy ass called in sick again.
We can give him the message.
May we talk in private?
So, either it's heatstroke, in which case we take the afternoon off,
or it's one of the diagnoses that you guys are gonna have for me
in two minutes.
You're in charge.
I know.
- Cop? - He's not packing.
Your dad's either a cop or a security guard.
Or she carries a weapon.
You're with the CIA.
One of our employees just returned from an assignment sick.
Now, we believe he may be the victim of an assassination attempt.
Sure.
You wanna close the door?
Door?
Well, I assume you're gonna drop trou at some point during the dance,
I don't see why I should share.
This isn't a joke.
If you're willing to help us, we need to leave now.
If I have to walk somewhere, there better be at least five girls involved.
And they better be working their way through college.
Okay, what have you got?
Hereditary brain disorder, transient ischemia
or paraneoplastic syndrome.
None of those go away with IV fluids. It's heatstroke.
Or Cushing's or calcium deficiency.
Who's your friend?
We use the term life partner.
Get a fresh history, neurological exam and an MRI of her head.
Fifteen minutes for the lap dance,
a half-hour to scrub the guilt off my soul...
See you in 45!
Dr. House, we need to hurry.
Yeah, we need to hurry.
Little advice.
I mean, obviously the Village People played out the whole cop thing.
But come on, CIA?
You seriously expect anyone to believe that?
It helps when you have props.
Keep your eye on my pen.
Very good.
Any nausea or vomiting before the seizure?
No.
My dad had some, but he's always like that before a race.
Could have been food poisoning.
- You two eat breakfast together? - No.
Any history of sciatica or spinal injury?
No.
Abnormal deep tendon reflex.
Really? Let me see.
- It's there. - I didn't say it wasn't there,
I said it was abnormal.
We're gonna give you an MRI to be sure,
but I'm guessing your symptoms were caused by just dehydration in the heat.
You're guessing?
Look, I make a living driving 300 miles an hour,
which makes the ability to stay conscious kind of important.
I'm sure it's just heatstroke,
but we're gonna do an MRI to be extra careful.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
You said you left your cell in your office.
I lied.
I wasn't going to take it.
Just tell you to turn it off for take-off.
I know.
I just wanted to see if you could tell that I was lying.
Useful information. Yeah?
Where are you?
I'm on a top-secret mission for the CIA.
Right.
There was nothing on your race car driver's CT
and the history and physical were normal.
Her deep tendon reflexes seemed a bit weak to me.
Areflexia could mean Miller Fisher.
Yes, areflexia could mean Miller Fisher,
but since the reflex was weak, not absent, it doesn't mean anything.
I'm releasing her. You can go back to your poker game.
Poker's illegal.
HOUSE: The CIA would never allowillegal activity.
THIRTEEN: Have you considered Miller Fisher?
Why? What happened?
She just had another seizure. And now she's getting a vertical nystagmus.
We think it's Miller Fisher, an inflammatory process.
In rare cases, it can cause respiratory failure, but...
Wait, wait. She could stop breathing?
You said there was nothing wrong. You said you were sure.
You just had another seizure. Clearly there's something wrong.
So, why should I trust you to figure out what it is?
Where's Dr. House? I'm at this hospital...
FOREMAN: It's gonna be all right.
We just need to start the plasmapheresis.
CASEY: No.
It's not going to be all right,
because you obviously don't have a clue what you're doing.
(MACHINE BEEPING) I'm not letting you touch me.
Honey!
I wanna see House. Where is he?
It looks a lot better on 24.
I take that back.
Dr. Samira Terzi. It's a pleasure to meet you, Dr. House.
We really appreciate the consult on such short notice.
There's nothing that gives me more pleasure than helping out a colleague.
This is Dr. Sidney Curtis from the Mayo Clinic.
He's also agreed to help with the diagnosis.
Dr. House.
Curtis on Immunology, Sidney Curtis?
You've read it?
Nope, but it is keeping my piano level.
So, where is the poor sick fella?
TAUB: What do we do?
I don't know yet.
COLE: She needs treatment.
AMBER: This is a test, right?
You're reporting back to him everything we do.
Yeah. And I asked the patient to be uncooperative.
Personally, I think she overplayed it.
She's being uncooperative because you made us all look like idiots.
We're only gonna look like idiots
if we can't figure out how to get her to agree to the treatment.
What would House do right now?
Pop a pill, insult us and trick the patient.
We can do that last part.
She's never met House before, has she?
KUTNER: Who's got a cane?
House isn't here.
We're not gonna act like him.
What do you want?
I'm gonna do what doctors aren't supposed to do,
admit I made a mistake.
I shouldn't have been so quick to dismiss your symptoms.
But you need to let us start the plasmapheresis.
What do you want?
Case? Honey, do you know where you are?
- She's burning up. - Start the treatment.
- I can't. - You've got my permission.
- She's obviously confused. - Doesn't matter anymore.
Miller Fisher doesn't cause delirium and fever.
I don't know what this is.
I'm afraid there are gonna be some limitations on his medical history.
Just let me know what you need and I should be able to provide it.
FYI, my malpractice insurance doesn't cover alien autopsies.
That's fine.
X-files are the next wing over.
Where was the patient when he first fell ill?
Sorry, that's classified.
But assume there aren't too many places in the world John hasn't been.
And, yes, John's a cover name.
And what makes you think it was an attempt on his life?
Sorry, can't tell you that, either.
- Well, what can you tell us? - Yeah.
Did Oswald really have sex with Marilyn Monroe?
(CURTIS EXCLAIMS)
Good Lord.
Very professional.
Five days ago he was 185 pounds. Perfect health.
Cool.
Fever and delirium rule out...
He's not gonna hire you just because you called him the most,
especially since it's obvious he doesn't want to be called.
Symptoms rule out Miller Fisher. MS fits better.
Progression's too fast. More likely meningitis.
Areflexia doesn't fit as well with...
Does with amyloidosis.
That's even slower than MS. It's lupus.
I'm with the little man on this one.
It's attacking the body and the brain, classic autoimmune.
Flirt all you want, but I should warn you, shiksas are for practice.
Lupus this aggressive wouldn't spare her kidneys.
It's primarily neurological. Let's start her on...
Then why no plaques on her MRI?
MRI was inconclusive. Start her on...
So, now you're sure that it's MS.
Just like you were sure it was Miller Fisher.
An hour after you were sure it was heatstroke.
The symptoms fit. Start her on interferon.
We're not gonna score any points with House
if we solve this just by running your errands.
- I get that you wanna be right. - You don't?
I'm just trying to save the patient, not score points with my boss.
Would it hurt the patient if you let us run some tests?
You've got three hours.
We've run six complete tox screens,
tested for every heavy metal, poison and biological agent we can think of.
It says here he ate a lot of chestnuts.
Hold on a second.
If the squirrel liberation army is involved, I'm out of here.
Those little rodents are...
Horse chestnuts are poisonous. If someone switched them...
Horse chestnuts may look like chestnuts,
but they taste like a horse's lower than chestnuts,
which makes the theory that he accidentally ate a couple of hundred
slightly less persuasive.
Seeing as how he was prowling the back alleys of Tehran...
It wasn't Tehran, it was...
(EXCLAIMS)
You almost got me.
Unless we know the local environmental factors,
the poisonous flora...
You know I can't tell you that.
Well, then why are we here? You might as well just Google "poison."
All they would tell me is he spent the last eleven months in Bolivia.
Who you gonna kill in Bolivia? My old housekeeper?
We don't kill people.
I'm sorry, who are you gonna marginalize?
If it is my housekeeper, she has it coming.
Cleaning the windows means cleaning both sides.
Am I right or am I right?
What does it matter what he was doing?
- The guy's dying. - Not anymore.
I know what's poisoning him, and who.
John.
It's just pancreatitis.
He's not an alcoholic.
And unless his pancreas is in his fingers...
Spies can't get fungal infections?
And the burns on his skin?
Spies can't get sunburns?
Bolivia doesn't have sun?
So, either we go with his theory of the non-drinking drunk,
or he was poisoned by some group
with the resources to make it completely untraceable,
some customized isotope.
Let's treat for radiation poisoning.
The iodine's to protect your thyroid. Antibiotics are to handle infections.
Should start working in a couple of hours.
We should celebrate with a beer or eight.
I don't drink.
Oh, me thinks he doth protest too much.
He's deathly ill. Why would he lie about drinking?
Guilt over killing a man would make anyone hit the sauce.
We don't kill people.
HOUSE: Right.
You just lie to your friends and family,
establish false identities, trick people into betraying their country.
He'd never cover up his drinking. He's too honest.
Hey! Something I've always wanted to know.
That poison lipstick that Ginger used to kiss Gilligan,
why didn't that kill her?
Okay, drum roll!
LP is negative for meningitis.
Sorry, Cole.
Fat pad biopsy is... Wait for it...
Negative for amyloidosis and Thirteen goes down!
Could we hurry this up? My son has...
Can I have a kid, too? I'm working too hard.
I could hook you up.
If I had two minutes and some anti-nausea meds,
I'd take you up on that.
And for the gold...
Protein's 65, glucose, 70.
It's MS, start her on interferon.
Now, turn to the last page.
Sad rate's 95, ANA's weakly positive.
Positive, it's lupus.
Weakly, not lupus. It's MS.
We obviously don't know what it is. Treat for both.
No. I gave in on the tests.
We're not treating her for two completely separate diseases
because you think lupus will win you a prize.
- Still think it's lupus? - Yeah.
Me, too.
In case of emergency, go to the emergency room.
Could be lupus.
That's what we figured.
Then why are you here?
You're an immunologist. We wanted to confirm...
Who are you looking for me to help you sell down the river? House or Cuddy?
Foreman.
- Sorry. - He's pushing MS.
Thinks that because he's in charge,
he has to prove he's the smartest guy in the room.
All I've heard about you, you put the patient above everything else.
That's why everyone finds you so annoying.
- All House cares about is results. - I know.
I'm talking about how to deal with Foreman.
So am I.
Fever's down to 101.5.
Treatment's working. Why are we out here?
Trying to figure out which treatment's working.
It's kind of tacky doing it in front of the patient.
You put her on steroids, too?
We had no choice.
The sad rate pointed to lupus.
And the ANA ruled it out!
Doctors!
Legs hurt?
I can't feel them at all. I don't think I can move them.
Vitals stabilizing.
Tummy ache's gone as well.
So, the treatment's working.
You wanna ditch Dr. Killjoy and hop on the company jet?
Little trip down Mexico way,
and I'm not talking about the country or the plane.
Do you think acting like an idiot and talking about sex works on girls?
Well, if it didn't, the human race would have died out long ago.
You're pretty cheery for someone
who was just proved wrong about his pancreatitis theory.
I'm appropriately cheery for someone who's been proved right.
John hasn't vomited in six hours.
What's to vomit? I'm eating his lunch.
Withholding nutrients is the treatment for pancreatitis.
That, and the antibiotics you put him on.
I did unhook your iodine, though.
Didn't seem to fit with the whole "I'm just jerking you guys around" Gestalt.
You're unbelievable.
Let's ask John if he'd rather be sick honestly or cured dishonestly.
John? John?
Any chance he's just overwhelmed with gratitude?
Paralysis.
It's a new symptom?
Big white space on the board where it would fit.
Nice, multicolored markers.
I'm not writing it because we can't know if it's a real symptom.
When these two went rogue and pumped her full of steroids, we lost...
Steroids don't cause paralysis.
FOREMAN: She was also on interferon.
Giving her both probably fried her immune system.
Who knows what infection you could cause...
We consulted an immunologist, she said we have...
She? You talking about Dr. Cameron?
- She thought lupus was... - She tell you to start treating?
Yes! They've ignored you, they screwed up
and it's fun watching you spank them.
But, can we get back to the medicine?
The last thing any of you give a damn about is the medicine.
Look.
I'm not saying you're bad doctors or bad people.
But House is.
He created a nasty little cutthroat world,
planted you in it, and is watching you play.
And none of it works for anyone except him.
And whoever wins.
Given its quick progression, we gotta assume botulism.
I'll go to her place. Check out her fridge and pantry.
It's not botulism. It's polio.
Brilliant. We should search her home for FDR's remains or a time machine.
She could have contracted it from anyone who's been to Africa, or...
She's been vaccinated.
Vaccines wear off.
There hasn't been a single American case in over 20 years.
I've seen this disease. I know what it looks like.
That's why you're finding it, because you're looking for it.
Polio?
- It's crazy. - House wouldn't think so.
So, go find House and tell him your theory.
Take a personal day. Seriously. Get out of here.
You don't have the power to fire me.
But I do have the power to kick your ass off my case.
I'm starting the botulism treatment.
The rest of you, look for confirmation.
He should be brought up on charges.
Okay, relax.
I'll take your book out from under my piano.
He's dying of radiation sickness. He's obviously in pain.
All of which could have been avoided if you hadn't interfered...
(GROANS)
What was that for?
Radiation sickness kills specific cells at specific times.
His hair should be coming out in clumps before he's writhing in pain.
Since it's not, I know who's trying to kill him.
God.
It's blood cancer, Waldenstrom's.
Radiation can cause infections, which set off neuropathy...
If you had any real evidence of foul play,
you'd be torturing Bolivians
instead of putting me into a state of anticipatory sexual arousal.
Can we treat for both?
Bad idea. Unless you're the one who's trying to poison him.
I'll arrange for plasmapheresis and chemo.
Are you gonna trust him after what he did?
I don't have to trust him to agree with him.
You make a good point.
I've been wrong every time and she still won't listen to you.
So, either she really likes me or she really hates you.
And I got a ride in the jet.
Oh, hi. What are you doing here?
Just came to say hi.
Hi again.
Where's Mrs. Bearman?
Sent her home.
I was scheduling her for an MRA.
If we gave MRAs to every patient with a headache...
This wasn't just a headache, it was the worst in her life.
And lucky for you, I'm a neurologist.
She went to a wine and cheese tasting. Both triggers for migraines.
She's never had a migraine before.
And I never had a blueberry bagel,
but for the first time I had one.
Bagels don't kill people.
This is a classic ticking bomb aneurism.
Wow. This taught me a lesson.
I guess when I mess with other people's patients,
I risk looking like an officious bitch.
We're gonna have to track down Mrs. Bearman.
Wait. Never mind.
It's funny.
It's not funny, it's totally immature.
It is funny.
You just can't appreciate it, because you're the victim.
Yeah. I deserve shame and ridicule for offering a consult.
Unheard of for a doctor.
You didn't offer a medical consult.
You offered a dealing-with-Foreman consult.
For the good of the patient. It's what House would have done.
Maybe House will hear about it and tear up with pride.
You think I'm trying to impress him.
I think that for someone who's not involved in his team,
you're remarkably involved in his team.
Let it go.
Let him go.
And that's mature.
One-twenty over 80. Let 'er rip.
Now we got the medical stuff out of the way,
why don't we meet back at your place
for some enhanced interrogation techniques?
My safe word is, "Help, please, please, stop."
It's two pleases. Anything less than that, you keep going.
You actually cure this guy, I'll show you my private water board.
We need to consult an oncologist about the chemo.
Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were still euphemizing.
My valet knows a little oncology.
I was wondering when you'd grow bored of avoiding my calls.
Oh, I could never grow bored of ignoring you.
What's the latest protocol on Waldenstrom's?
Where are you?
CIA headquarters.
How much fludarabine do you need...
Either you're sprawled naked on your floor with an empty bottle of Vicodin
or collapsed naked in front of your computer
with an empty bottle of Viagra.
Please tell me which, because Chase has another pool going.
They flew me in to help deal with a sick employee.
How much... WILSON: Hallucinations?
Damn, I shouldn't have bet on the Viagra.
Okay. Call the Langley switchboard, ask for extension...
- Thirty-five, seventy-eight. - Three, five, seven, eight.
He asked an awful lot of questions for a valet.
You know, I happen to have a position available on my penis.
Wait a second, I think I screwed up that joke.
You offering me a job?
I'd settle for that.
As tempting as a position on your staff is, I like it here.
Pays better, and we've only had one assassination attempt.
And I'm sure you're a great boss.
That's why your fellows left en masse a couple of months ago.
I have satellite images.
(PHONE RINGING)
Inspector Gadget?
My God, you're actually at the CIA.
You've gotta get down here.
They've got a satellite aimed directly into (Buddy's vagina.
I told them the chances of invasion are slim to none, but...
Waldenstrom's.
Recommended dose is 25 milligrams per meter squared.
They do a background check on you?
Twenty-five milligrams.
They did a background check on you,
they did a background check on your friends.
Relax. I'm sure they already know
that you brought heroin back from Afghanistan.
WILSON: That's not true.
I've never been to Afghanistan.
House?
LOU: She's getting worse.
Her fever's risen slightly.
But it's definitely... What? Botulism?
Right? Because if you're wrong again,
and you're treating her for something that she doesn't even have...
The anti-toxin hasn't had time to work yet.
I know it's hard, but try to be patient.
Excuse me.
I know you're pissed I interrupted,
but you're gonna be even more pissed in a second.
You tested her without telling me?
Yeah. I know, I'm really, really sorry, but...
On the other hand, it's positive.
She has polio.
Now what, boss?
Where's House?
He's blown off four hours of clinic.
He's consulting for the CIA.
Seriously, call Langley,
and ask for extension three, five... It's three, five, three, six?
It's definitely two threes.
I wrote it down. I have it somewhere.
He's gonna make up twice his skipped hours in the clinic.
Okay-duke.
And for protecting him, you're gonna make up twice that.
Why are you punishing me worse than him?
Because House never learns. You might.
(DOOR CLOSES)
How are you feeling?
Like crap.
Yeah. Cancer can be that way.
My hair is falling out.
Is that the chemo?
No, that's too quick.
So, what does it mean?
It means you don't have cancer.
Someone actually did try to kill you.
You're stubborn. You're arrogant!
There's no need to yell.
You may have cost that man his life.
He's getting the radiation treatment.
Twenty-four hours too late.
I didn't yell at you when I thought you were wrong.
- I wasn't wrong. - This isn't productive.
There is no "productive," it's too late!
Because of your inexperience, your poor judgment
and your failure to recognize a reckless fool.
Cordyceps sinensis.
It's an herbal treatment derived from a parasitic fungus.
Comes from caterpillars.
Along with dimercaprol chelation,
it's been shown to mitigate bone marrow damage
from radiation poisoning
in monkeys.
Sorry. I was stubborn and arrogant.
Self-recriminations won't help her.
Nothing's gonna help her, she's got polio.
There's no cure, but there are treatments.
No, she's dying.
Yeah, every death's a tragedy.
Funny how you weren't so depressed
when she was just dying because me and Amber screwed up.
And I'm also self-centered, thanks for clarifying.
Don't forget self-pitying.
Vitamin C. Extremely high doses.
It was experimental treatment protocol in the '50s...
And they haven't finished yet?
They lost funding.
That's because there's no logical reason vitamin C would cure polio.
Well, someone thought there was.
Someone thought black people made excellent farm implements.
I'm not talking about hurting anyone.
I just want to force-feed her some orange juice.
You wanna throw in some bacon and eggs as well?
If there's anything you learned today,
it's gotta be that you can be wrong.
John, can you hear me?
We're gonna start you on an experimental treatment.
Tea?
It's a Chinese herb which has been effective.
I'm dying, aren't I?
Probably.
We're gonna attempt an experimental protocol.
- A new drug? - An old one. Vitamin C.
Ultra-high doses have been shown
to destroy the polio virus and heal nerve damage.
She could regain use of her legs?
It's unlikely.
But we're gonna try.
Don't give up.
(SIGHS)
Nausea's not as bad.
Radiation sickness has a latency period.
You'll get better before you get worse.
Wanna know what I really did down there?
Only if it's interesting.
The women there,
during Carnival, they...
They do this dance.
They call it the devil dance.
Not interesting.
I spent the whole 40 days with this
attache to the Minister of Defense.
The most buttoned-down woman you'd ever meet,
except when she did this dance.
She agreed to tell me stuff.
(GASPS)
Okay, you got half a good story there.
Karma.
Best way to rid yourself of that guilt is to confess your sins.
This pain, it's right. It's comforting.
It makes me think that somehow it all makes sense.
What do you mean 40 days?
When they found out
what she'd told me...
Carnival in Bolivia's only eight days.
You have any idea what a chestnut looks like?
You idiot!
Who are you calling an idiot?
Whoever knew that John was stationed in Brazil, not Bolivia.
Brazil?
Well, then, I guess I'm talking to you, idiot.
It's the same region. It's the same parasites, same diseases.
But not the same language.
In Bolivia, chestnuts are chestnuts.
Brazil, on the other hand, has castanhas-do-péra
literally, chestnuts from Péra,
because it would be stupid for people from Brazil to call them Brazil nuts.
So, he ate Brazil nuts. Big deal.
No, he ate a lot of Brazil nuts, which is a big deal,
because they contain selenium,
which in high doses causes fatigue, vomiting, skin irritation,
discharge from the fingernail beds and hair loss.
Any of that sounding familiar?
Can you treat it?
We already started.
Treatment's chelation, the same as for radiation sickness.
The only difference is it works a lot better on nut poisoning.
So, what's the problem?
You're an idiot.
Why is she shivering?
Low serum calcium is a side effect of the treatment.
I can give her a calcium supplement.
My arm hurts.
The infusion rate has to remain high for the treatment to work.
Is it working?
(GASPS)
You feel that?
Yeah, it hurts.
It's working! This is fantastic.
There's a lot you could learn at my fellowship.
If you knew the procedures I could teach you...
Of course, we'd need a nurse to prep.
I know how to kill a man with my thumb.
Actually, I was just trying to make another euphemism for sex.
So was I.
Oh, God. How can you flirt with this idiot?
He lied to us again and again. He broke laws, ethical codes...
I was right.
That doesn't mean everything.
It means a lot.
Dr. Curtis, Dr. House. I appreciate your help.
(DOOR OPENS)
- Hey- - Hey-
When you were dying,
you tried to infect me,
because you knew I'd fight for you
if I thought I was dying, too.
Are you bringing this up now so I'll forgive you for messing with my patient?
I'm happy I changed jobs.
But I know I'll never have that sort of
excitement.
You miss people trying to kill you?
No.
I miss people doing whatever it takes to get the job done.
I guess that's why I'm having trouble giving it up.
I shouldn't have helped them mess with your patient.
They had to screw with me. I've gotten everything wrong.
I don't believe it.
You're not gonna get everything right.
But you're never gonna get everything wrong.
(DOOR CLOSES)
Morning!
Where have you been the last two days?
- Overslept. - We saved speed racer.
She had polio. We cured it with vitamin C.
Yeah. I cured depression with tonic water once.
Actually, I think there was some gin in it, too.
A hundred and fifty grams over six hours.
It worked.
FOREMAN: No, it didn't.
I told you, you can't cure polio.
It means either she's not cured or she never had it.
Since she's walking out of here, I tested her blood from admittance.
No polio.
Means Brennan screwed up the lab tests.
Or you screwed up your lab tests.
You must have. She got better.
So, it's relapsing and remitting. Maybe porphyria.
Well, that's a stretch.
If she had porphyria, you'd have seen purple urine.
You think it's more likely he cured polio?
Well, they believe it.
Her symptoms fit perfectly.
Any alternative is unbelievably convoluted.
Some doctor would have to poison her with thallium so it looks like polio,
then fake a lab test, then give her vitamin C
and stop the poison so she magically gets better.
Actually, it is kind of doable, right?
So, what do you think?
Shall we test her for thallium before you contact Stockholm?
You poisoned her?
HOUSE: The really shocking thing
is that Foreman was right about the heatstroke.
Vitamin C cures polio. I've seen it.
Yeah. In some bush clinic.
You needed polio in a place with a proper lab.
The only problem is that places with proper labs don't have polio.
There is no money in finding cures for diseases that only kill poor people.
This will make them do research.
What do you care if I faked a lab test,
if it saves a few thousand lives?
I did what I had to do.
Isn't that what you hired us for?
Which is why I'm not gonna fire you.
You're gonna quit.
Go on, get out of here.
So, you're just gonna let him go?
Absolutely.
And I'm gonna let him get as far away as possible before you call the cops.
Guy's a nut job.
Who the hell did I leave in charge?
Foreman.
There was a reason for that. Next time, listen to him.
Where have you been? And don't say the CIA.
Okay-
By the way, one of my employees...
Either you're gonna have to get someone from the CIA
to call and confirm your story,
or you're doing eight clinic hours and Wilson is doing 16.
I was in the Hamptons.
I was helping some rich hedge fund jerk treat his son's sniffles.
Fascinating as that sounds.
For your honesty, I will forgive your hours.
Thank you.
No!
The only thing less likely than you helping the CIA
is you helping some rich guy in Long Island.
You're doing your hours and Wilson's.
I know how to kill a man with my thumb.
Who doesn't?
Hi.
I'm gonna take you up on your offer.
Yeah?
Well, I live a couple of miles from here.
That's not the offer I meant.
I gave notice today.
You said you were happy at the company.
I lied.
Doubt you'll hold it against me.
I'll see you at 9:00 on Monday.