1 00:00:02,107 --> 00:00:04,818 (PEOPLE CLAMORING) 2 00:00:04,943 --> 00:00:08,447 Whoever thought walking in a circle at two miles an hour would be draining? 3 00:00:08,572 --> 00:00:11,241 Fresh air, exercise. 4 00:00:11,366 --> 00:00:13,410 You know, some things do have their negative sides. 5 00:00:13,535 --> 00:00:15,621 Our income just got cut in half. 6 00:00:15,746 --> 00:00:18,165 And we get to spend twice as much time together. 7 00:00:18,290 --> 00:00:20,751 More, if you don't leave before your lunch hour is over. 8 00:00:20,876 --> 00:00:22,419 (CHUCKLES) 9 00:00:23,003 --> 00:00:24,921 Out of my way. 10 00:00:25,047 --> 00:00:27,716 We have a legal right to hold you up for 15 seconds. 11 00:00:27,841 --> 00:00:29,176 Fifteen, fourteen... 12 00:00:29,301 --> 00:00:30,302 One. 13 00:00:30,427 --> 00:00:31,970 Eleven, ten... 14 00:00:32,888 --> 00:00:33,889 0w! 15 00:00:35,641 --> 00:00:37,434 Just trying to do my job. 16 00:00:38,977 --> 00:00:42,230 Hey, relax. Three more seconds and you can go. 17 00:00:45,025 --> 00:00:47,569 Are you telling me what to do? 18 00:00:47,819 --> 00:00:49,404 It's okay. 19 00:00:50,447 --> 00:00:52,074 Just take a breath. 20 00:00:52,199 --> 00:00:54,159 Get the hell off me! 21 00:00:54,284 --> 00:00:56,662 (LAUGHS) I think it's been 15... 22 00:01:00,791 --> 00:01:02,292 You Okay? 23 00:01:05,087 --> 00:01:05,962 (THUD) 24 00:01:06,254 --> 00:01:07,756 WOMAN: Oh, my God. Jeff? 25 00:01:39,329 --> 00:01:41,665 (ALL CHATTERING) 26 00:01:43,500 --> 00:01:44,543 WOMAN: Standby. 27 00:01:52,259 --> 00:01:53,260 (SLURPING) 28 00:01:56,138 --> 00:01:57,264 Place is a mess. 29 00:01:57,389 --> 00:02:00,183 Welcome to a world without nurses. Here, you can start with these. 30 00:02:00,308 --> 00:02:02,561 HOUSE: It's not my fault. I don't use nurses. 31 00:02:02,769 --> 00:02:04,563 Cuddy was looking for you, said she would send you down here. 32 00:02:04,688 --> 00:02:06,481 I know. That's why I'm here. 33 00:02:06,606 --> 00:02:08,775 Because Cuddy hasn't found you yet. 34 00:02:08,900 --> 00:02:12,946 She's going to look everywhere except the place she wants me to be. 35 00:02:26,418 --> 00:02:28,462 - Hey. - I've got an aortic dissection here. 36 00:02:28,587 --> 00:02:30,839 What's with the idiot? 37 00:02:30,964 --> 00:02:31,923 (CAMERON SIGHS) 38 00:02:32,841 --> 00:02:35,677 Fainting spell and a recent history of dysgeusia, 39 00:02:35,802 --> 00:02:37,471 everything tastes like lemon meringue pie. 40 00:02:37,596 --> 00:02:38,889 You want to take him? 41 00:02:39,014 --> 00:02:40,015 No. 42 00:02:44,019 --> 00:02:45,687 Si" 43 00:02:45,812 --> 00:02:48,398 Why do you have two lunches in front of you? 44 00:02:48,523 --> 00:02:50,484 Been here for two meals. 45 00:02:50,859 --> 00:02:52,611 - And you're happy with that? - No. 46 00:02:52,861 --> 00:02:55,030 I just don't see much use in complaining. 47 00:02:55,405 --> 00:02:56,823 Seriously? 48 00:02:58,492 --> 00:03:00,118 It's a pretty useful tool. 49 00:03:00,327 --> 00:03:02,871 You complain, make people miserable. 50 00:03:03,497 --> 00:03:05,832 Then they do what you want, to make the misery go away. 51 00:03:05,957 --> 00:03:08,835 We probably should say something. Maybe I can call one of the doctors... 52 00:03:08,960 --> 00:03:10,879 They're doing their best. 53 00:03:15,008 --> 00:03:16,009 0w! 54 00:03:16,134 --> 00:03:17,803 What the hell? 55 00:03:18,887 --> 00:03:21,097 I'm sure it was an accident. 56 00:03:21,640 --> 00:03:23,225 Is he Canadian? 57 00:03:23,350 --> 00:03:25,101 He's a low priority. 58 00:03:25,769 --> 00:03:27,229 Is that a yes? 59 00:03:27,729 --> 00:03:30,565 - He's just... - Happy- 60 00:03:31,149 --> 00:03:33,902 I've got to stop this, before it spreads. 61 00:03:34,027 --> 00:03:34,986 (WHISTLES) 62 00:03:35,862 --> 00:03:37,239 You guys are done. 63 00:03:39,616 --> 00:03:43,453 Could be a metabolic disorder, toxic exposure, 64 00:03:43,578 --> 00:03:46,957 carcinoma of the tongue metastasized to the brain, epilepsy, M.S. 65 00:03:47,082 --> 00:03:50,252 Or it could be the flu and we should all be back in the E.R. 66 00:03:50,377 --> 00:03:53,004 No, you're ignoring the big symptom. 67 00:03:53,129 --> 00:03:57,634 What if we were looking at both the flu and decent parenting. 68 00:03:58,552 --> 00:04:01,012 Okay, you two are perfectly healthy. 69 00:04:01,137 --> 00:04:03,223 This guy wasn't pandering. He wasn't vanilla nice. 70 00:04:03,348 --> 00:04:05,892 He was nice without any aspiration of personal gain. 71 00:04:06,142 --> 00:04:07,769 I'm thinking genetic defect. 72 00:04:07,894 --> 00:04:10,063 (SCOFFS) Niceness is a defect? 73 00:04:11,147 --> 00:04:14,901 Three cavemen see a stranger running towards them with a spear 74 00:04:15,026 --> 00:04:19,114 one fights, one flees, one smiles and invites him over for fondue. 75 00:04:19,239 --> 00:04:21,074 That last guy didn't last long enough to procreate. 76 00:04:21,199 --> 00:04:24,035 And how long has the patient been suffering? 77 00:04:24,160 --> 00:04:26,454 At least as long as his wife has known him, eleven years. 78 00:04:26,580 --> 00:04:28,915 The chances of him having an undiagnosed pathology for that long... 79 00:04:29,040 --> 00:04:30,250 What are you saying? 80 00:04:30,375 --> 00:04:31,585 Evolution is wrong? 81 00:04:31,710 --> 00:04:35,213 (SCOFFS) Where do you think we are? 21st century America? 82 00:04:35,338 --> 00:04:37,799 He's saying that statistics are true, too. 83 00:04:37,924 --> 00:04:39,467 The world is a bell curve, 84 00:04:39,593 --> 00:04:41,803 most of us fall within the standard deviation. 85 00:04:41,928 --> 00:04:43,138 But there are outliers. 86 00:04:43,263 --> 00:04:46,558 And if we believe in the existence of extreme jerkiness, 87 00:04:46,683 --> 00:04:49,394 which I suspect that we do, 88 00:04:51,187 --> 00:04:54,274 then we also have to accept the existence of the opposite extreme. 89 00:04:54,399 --> 00:04:57,736 You want it to be a symptom, because then we're supposed to be jerks, 90 00:04:57,861 --> 00:05:00,155 which means you don't even have to try to be nice. 91 00:05:01,531 --> 00:05:04,326 Okay, maybe I am biased. Let's take a vote. 92 00:05:04,451 --> 00:05:06,995 Who thinks that niceness is not a symptom? 93 00:05:08,079 --> 00:05:11,666 And who thinks that their vote counts? 94 00:05:16,338 --> 00:05:19,299 You two, check out his home for toxins. Taub and 31... 95 00:05:19,424 --> 00:05:20,467 31? 96 00:05:21,301 --> 00:05:24,054 Oh, I'm sorry, I thought that either way was good with you. 97 00:05:24,554 --> 00:05:28,391 Taub and Thirteen, MRI for tumors, EEG for nerve damage 98 00:05:28,516 --> 00:05:31,311 and test whatever comes out of him for everything else. 99 00:05:44,658 --> 00:05:46,618 CHASE: Too much axis tilt. 100 00:05:47,494 --> 00:05:51,456 Don't release until your thumb's at the bottom of the ball. 101 00:05:51,873 --> 00:05:53,541 I assume Wilson was busy. 102 00:05:53,667 --> 00:05:55,085 Again. 103 00:06:08,139 --> 00:06:10,100 No axis tilt. 104 00:06:14,145 --> 00:06:15,438 With Amber? 105 00:06:15,563 --> 00:06:16,523 Again. 106 00:06:16,856 --> 00:06:20,151 Still. It was nice of you to invite me. This is fun. 107 00:06:22,153 --> 00:06:24,406 No, it wasn't. No, it isn't. 108 00:06:24,531 --> 00:06:26,241 I didn't invite you to be nice, I invited you 109 00:06:26,366 --> 00:06:30,203 because bowling isn't one of the two things guys do by themselves. 110 00:06:30,662 --> 00:06:31,955 What's the second thing? 111 00:06:32,288 --> 00:06:34,124 Other hand. 112 00:06:38,128 --> 00:06:41,589 Well, if people are incapable of being nice, why bother having the word? 113 00:06:42,382 --> 00:06:44,175 The ontological proof of niceness. 114 00:06:44,300 --> 00:06:47,554 The existence of the word proves the existence of the concept. 115 00:06:47,679 --> 00:06:50,640 Look out for those minotaurs on your drive home. 116 00:06:50,974 --> 00:06:54,811 And I thought motives didn't matter, only results mattered. 117 00:06:55,645 --> 00:06:57,230 So what are you gonna do? 118 00:06:57,564 --> 00:06:59,899 To screw up Wilson's relationship so you don't have to listen to me 119 00:07:00,025 --> 00:07:01,568 while you bowl. 120 00:07:01,818 --> 00:07:06,698 I wish the best for them, and their tragically deformed children. 121 00:07:08,033 --> 00:07:10,410 She's good at being bad. 122 00:07:10,535 --> 00:07:11,494 (GUTTER BALLING) 123 00:07:11,703 --> 00:07:13,329 You might not be able to destroy her. 124 00:07:13,455 --> 00:07:17,208 As long as I give it my best shot, I can hold my head high. 125 00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:20,045 Cameron had this one insufferable friend. 126 00:07:20,170 --> 00:07:23,339 She wasn't going to get rid of her, and I sure wasn't going to join them. 127 00:07:23,465 --> 00:07:26,509 So I just said, "See her on Thursdays." 128 00:07:26,634 --> 00:07:29,304 I know it's not as exciting as an exploding birthday cake, 129 00:07:29,429 --> 00:07:33,975 but, hell, I don't want to hang out with her every night anyway. 130 00:07:34,100 --> 00:07:38,438 That's amazing. Cameron only has one insufferable friend? 131 00:07:55,830 --> 00:07:57,916 Joint custody. 132 00:07:58,041 --> 00:07:59,459 Of Wilson? 133 00:07:59,584 --> 00:08:01,961 Unless we have another love child. 134 00:08:02,587 --> 00:08:03,797 Deal with him. 135 00:08:04,047 --> 00:08:05,924 He needs a mother figure. 136 00:08:06,174 --> 00:08:07,967 I'm not saying you're not entitled to spend time with him. 137 00:08:08,218 --> 00:08:10,220 I'm just saying I'm entitled, too. 138 00:08:11,137 --> 00:08:14,349 I don't know how to deal with him when he's being reasonable. 139 00:08:14,474 --> 00:08:16,810 This is reasonable? This is crazy. 140 00:08:16,935 --> 00:08:19,062 You're not a child, you can make your own plans. 141 00:08:19,187 --> 00:08:22,232 No. Crazy is what House would normally do in this situation, 142 00:08:22,357 --> 00:08:24,400 swap your lubricant with super glue. 143 00:08:24,526 --> 00:08:25,568 The man knows me. 144 00:08:25,693 --> 00:08:29,155 This is his way of accepting us. 145 00:08:29,280 --> 00:08:30,990 It's actually a very touching moment. 146 00:08:31,116 --> 00:08:35,120 I'm proposing I get every other day and every other weekend. 147 00:08:39,290 --> 00:08:41,376 I have Yoga Wednesdays, you can have him then, 148 00:08:41,501 --> 00:08:44,212 but you have to have him home by 11:00. 149 00:08:46,172 --> 00:08:48,675 We can swap weekends. 150 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:50,969 Mondays and Wednesdays. And midnight. 151 00:08:51,094 --> 00:08:53,763 If he's not home till midnight, we won't be asleep till almost 2:00. 152 00:08:53,888 --> 00:08:56,182 Wilson, make a ruling. 153 00:08:56,307 --> 00:08:57,767 (LAUGHS) 154 00:08:57,892 --> 00:08:59,060 No. 155 00:08:59,185 --> 00:09:02,313 You two are like dogs circling each other in the park. 156 00:09:02,438 --> 00:09:05,275 And I say that with all the love in the world. 157 00:09:05,400 --> 00:09:07,402 You need to sniff each other's butts, bare your teeth 158 00:09:07,527 --> 00:09:09,320 and arrive at some strange détente. 159 00:09:09,445 --> 00:09:11,739 Otherwise you'll end up biting each other's eyes out. 160 00:09:11,865 --> 00:09:15,702 Again, with all the love in the world. 161 00:09:17,829 --> 00:09:19,330 I'll let you sniff first. 162 00:09:19,581 --> 00:09:21,666 Take my deal or get out of my apartment. 163 00:09:21,791 --> 00:09:25,753 Take my deal or I move in. 164 00:09:31,926 --> 00:09:34,804 This guy worked for Habitat for Humanity in Costa Rica. 165 00:09:34,929 --> 00:09:36,723 And coaches handicapped kids. 166 00:09:36,848 --> 00:09:38,558 You think we should do a work up, on the other coaches? 167 00:09:38,683 --> 00:09:40,310 It is possible he's too perfect. 168 00:09:40,435 --> 00:09:42,562 I'm not saying he's perfect, I'm saying he's trying to be. 169 00:09:42,687 --> 00:09:44,689 It's what people do. 170 00:09:46,316 --> 00:09:47,192 What? 171 00:09:47,317 --> 00:09:48,610 That's not what people do. 172 00:09:48,735 --> 00:09:52,322 People usually suck, but they want to be good, want to be nice. 173 00:09:52,447 --> 00:09:53,781 House? 174 00:09:54,115 --> 00:09:55,867 Exception that proves the rule. 175 00:09:56,242 --> 00:09:57,869 What sort of argument is that? 176 00:09:57,994 --> 00:09:59,037 Bad one. 177 00:10:03,166 --> 00:10:05,084 That might be relevant. 178 00:10:05,710 --> 00:10:09,923 Hydrofluoric acid. Lowers his calcium, causes the fainting and taste issue. 179 00:10:10,048 --> 00:10:12,133 But not the niceness. 180 00:10:12,258 --> 00:10:13,718 Wouldn't that be nice? 181 00:10:16,512 --> 00:10:18,681 You are King Solomon. 182 00:10:19,641 --> 00:10:21,976 If you want us to cut him in half, we're cool with that. 183 00:10:22,101 --> 00:10:24,938 My boyfriend's too much of a wuss to make the call for himself. 184 00:10:25,063 --> 00:10:27,440 And I mean that with all the love in the world. 185 00:10:27,565 --> 00:10:31,027 I'm gonna piss off one of them. And they both scare me. 186 00:10:47,919 --> 00:10:50,755 "Your treatment of patients is reprehensible." 187 00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:52,006 You're reading his performance review? 188 00:10:52,131 --> 00:10:54,634 I'm busy. We have a nurses' strike. 189 00:10:54,759 --> 00:10:57,553 "Your management of employees borders on abuse." 190 00:10:57,679 --> 00:10:59,264 Let's go. 191 00:10:59,555 --> 00:11:02,475 No, I... I want to hear it. 192 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,353 "You are overtly contemptuous of hospital hierarchy." 193 00:11:05,478 --> 00:11:07,272 And covertly. 194 00:11:07,397 --> 00:11:10,108 But I suppose, you didn't know about that. 195 00:11:10,233 --> 00:11:13,945 "Your attitude towards supervisory personnel is disrespectful. 196 00:11:14,070 --> 00:11:17,282 "And a disturbingly large proportion of your comments are racist or sexist." 197 00:11:17,407 --> 00:11:20,785 That top makes you look like an Afghani prostitute. 198 00:11:21,119 --> 00:11:23,079 Would be an example of that. 199 00:11:23,204 --> 00:11:25,790 Sign this. 200 00:11:25,915 --> 00:11:27,959 - House, I got the... - It can wait. 201 00:11:28,084 --> 00:11:30,295 I will sign if you will give us a ruling. 202 00:11:30,420 --> 00:11:34,299 I will give you a ruling if you do the reviews on your team. 203 00:11:37,343 --> 00:11:41,139 I'd be happy to continue the mockery of this process. 204 00:11:41,931 --> 00:11:44,100 - What did you offer him? - Wednesdays till 11 :00, 205 00:11:44,225 --> 00:11:45,143 and alternate weekends. 206 00:11:45,268 --> 00:11:47,979 Wednesdays till 11 :00, and alternate weekends. 207 00:11:48,104 --> 00:11:51,941 Yes! Wednesday nights are Ladies' Nights at Cheetah's. 208 00:11:53,067 --> 00:11:54,277 Calcium's normal. 209 00:11:54,402 --> 00:11:56,112 Wow. It really could wait. 210 00:11:56,237 --> 00:11:58,031 - Everything's normal. - And you thought it wouldn't be? 211 00:11:58,156 --> 00:12:00,325 He's a carpet cleaner, he's got a home full of hydrofluoric acid. 212 00:12:00,450 --> 00:12:02,035 Doesn't mean his calcium should be low. 213 00:12:02,160 --> 00:12:04,495 Yeah, actually, it kind of does. HF causes lower levels of... 214 00:12:04,620 --> 00:12:06,622 - Lower, not low. - Lower than normal. 215 00:12:06,748 --> 00:12:08,458 Lower than yesterday. Yesterday might have been high. 216 00:12:08,583 --> 00:12:10,460 What's lower than high? 217 00:12:11,669 --> 00:12:14,088 He actually has hypercalcemia, 218 00:12:14,213 --> 00:12:16,049 which is being lowered to normal by the HF. 219 00:12:16,174 --> 00:12:18,718 So what gives us elevated calcium, bad taste and fainting? 220 00:12:18,843 --> 00:12:20,136 I take it you know. 221 00:12:20,261 --> 00:12:22,430 Get the team. This is gonna be fun. 222 00:12:26,851 --> 00:12:28,978 Hello, again. 223 00:12:29,103 --> 00:12:32,690 These people think you're not too nice. 224 00:12:32,899 --> 00:12:34,817 Too nice? For what? 225 00:12:34,942 --> 00:12:37,904 For life as we know it to have evolved without an intelligent designer. 226 00:12:38,029 --> 00:12:40,031 I'm going to prove them wrong. 227 00:12:40,156 --> 00:12:42,200 Your wife is very ugly. 228 00:12:42,325 --> 00:12:43,201 Get out of here. 229 00:12:43,326 --> 00:12:44,243 JEFF: Deb... 230 00:12:45,453 --> 00:12:48,331 He's obviously trying to prove a point. 231 00:12:49,207 --> 00:12:53,086 I think I just did. You're either perfect or you're sick. 232 00:12:53,211 --> 00:12:55,046 And in my experience, sick is much more common. 233 00:12:55,171 --> 00:12:56,881 He's not sick. He's nice. 234 00:12:57,006 --> 00:12:59,967 Nice in the sense that your toaster is nice for making you breakfast. 235 00:13:00,093 --> 00:13:02,303 It's the only thing his wiring will let him do. 236 00:13:02,428 --> 00:13:04,138 He has Williams Syndrome. 237 00:13:04,263 --> 00:13:07,725 Your husband is missing the genes that make him suspicious. 238 00:13:07,850 --> 00:13:09,018 You're wrong, he's... 239 00:13:09,143 --> 00:13:11,020 Relax, there's no cure. 240 00:13:11,145 --> 00:13:13,314 He's gonna go right on tasting lemon meringue pie, 241 00:13:13,439 --> 00:13:15,066 fainting and being a sap. 242 00:13:15,566 --> 00:13:17,068 What about the other symptoms? 243 00:13:17,193 --> 00:13:18,486 He has no other symptoms. 244 00:13:18,611 --> 00:13:19,737 But Williams does. 245 00:13:19,862 --> 00:13:21,864 He's got the teeth, the glasses... 246 00:13:22,198 --> 00:13:23,825 Williams cuts IQ by 20... 247 00:13:23,950 --> 00:13:26,035 He doesn't work in the physics department, 248 00:13:26,160 --> 00:13:28,204 except when they spill a black hole on their carpet. 249 00:13:28,329 --> 00:13:30,123 Elfin appearance? 250 00:13:30,581 --> 00:13:33,709 Yeah, he's more Legolas than Keebler. 251 00:13:33,835 --> 00:13:36,587 Bet you he can still crack off a batch of Pecan Sandies. 252 00:13:36,712 --> 00:13:37,880 Perfect pitch? 253 00:13:38,172 --> 00:13:39,757 You love to karaoke, right? 254 00:13:40,883 --> 00:13:42,718 - I suck. - Modest. 255 00:13:42,844 --> 00:13:45,179 - Another symptom. - No, he really does suck. 256 00:13:45,847 --> 00:13:47,974 Give us a warble. Know any Cher? 257 00:13:48,099 --> 00:13:50,309 No, but I know Bread. 258 00:13:51,394 --> 00:13:53,354 (SINGING) Baby, I'm-a want you 259 00:13:54,272 --> 00:13:56,149 Baby, I'm-a need you 260 00:13:56,691 --> 00:14:01,529 You're the only one I care enough to hurt about 261 00:14:01,654 --> 00:14:03,364 Maybe I'm-a... 262 00:14:04,198 --> 00:14:08,744 (SINGING INCOHERENTLY) 263 00:14:08,870 --> 00:14:09,871 What's the matter? 264 00:14:09,996 --> 00:14:10,913 (GROANS) 265 00:14:11,038 --> 00:14:12,790 He's stroking! 266 00:14:17,920 --> 00:14:19,964 Not a moment too soon. 267 00:14:31,017 --> 00:14:32,768 TAUB: You were wrong. 268 00:14:33,060 --> 00:14:36,981 Why do people say that with such pleasure? It's very hurtful, you know. 269 00:14:37,106 --> 00:14:39,775 It means the patient gets to keep being nice. Why does that offend you? 270 00:14:39,901 --> 00:14:41,027 It's the way he said it. 271 00:14:41,152 --> 00:14:45,781 He wasn't relieved, he was excited. He was also wrong. 272 00:14:45,907 --> 00:14:47,909 And I say that with no sense of pleasure. 273 00:14:48,034 --> 00:14:49,452 KUTNER: Patient tested negative for Williams, 274 00:14:49,577 --> 00:14:51,662 which means the stroke and everything else wasn't caused... 275 00:14:51,787 --> 00:14:55,791 You have a friendly demeanor but you sometimes get too involved. 276 00:14:55,917 --> 00:14:58,669 You relate well to your peers and patients 277 00:14:58,794 --> 00:15:01,839 and you complete tasks in a timely manner. 278 00:15:02,256 --> 00:15:03,925 Please sign. 279 00:15:04,050 --> 00:15:05,343 - What the hell was that? - I have to give 280 00:15:05,468 --> 00:15:07,553 each of you performance reviews. 281 00:15:07,678 --> 00:15:10,640 Plenty of other conditions can cause debilitating niceness. 282 00:15:10,765 --> 00:15:12,892 How is that supposed to help him? 283 00:15:13,017 --> 00:15:15,353 I don't know, how was it supposed to help Wilson? 284 00:15:15,478 --> 00:15:18,105 Cross out Wilson's name and the date and then fill in your own. 285 00:15:18,231 --> 00:15:20,733 The point of a review is to give feedback to help... 286 00:15:20,858 --> 00:15:22,652 I'm thinking neurosyphilis. 287 00:15:22,777 --> 00:15:25,655 Wouldn't show up on the MRI without contrast. 288 00:15:27,740 --> 00:15:29,992 I'll go run the tests. 289 00:15:35,331 --> 00:15:39,377 He doesn't think it's syphilis, but he's gonna go run those tests anyway. 290 00:15:39,502 --> 00:15:42,255 Because he doesn't know, that's why we do tests. 291 00:15:42,380 --> 00:15:44,966 Because he's a wimp. Because he's afraid of you. 292 00:15:45,091 --> 00:15:47,718 You want me to intimidate him into not being afraid? 293 00:15:47,843 --> 00:15:49,887 - Not sure I know how to do that. - Reviews make a difference. 294 00:15:50,137 --> 00:15:51,597 People have to listen, so they have to learn... 295 00:15:51,722 --> 00:15:52,932 I don't think the right time 296 00:15:53,057 --> 00:15:56,018 to tell the dog not to pee on the rug is semi-annually. 297 00:15:56,143 --> 00:15:57,937 You don't want to do the paperwork. 298 00:15:58,062 --> 00:16:00,523 I am concerned about the rain forest. 299 00:16:01,232 --> 00:16:02,275 (SIGHS) 300 00:16:02,400 --> 00:16:03,818 I'll do it. 301 00:16:03,943 --> 00:16:05,027 I know. 302 00:16:10,157 --> 00:16:12,076 I don't have syphilis. 303 00:16:12,201 --> 00:16:13,619 You don't know. 304 00:16:14,287 --> 00:16:16,247 How many ways are there to get it? 305 00:16:16,372 --> 00:16:18,791 You can know who you had sex with, you can't know who she... 306 00:16:18,916 --> 00:16:20,001 I do. 307 00:16:20,126 --> 00:16:21,377 Not for sure. 308 00:16:21,502 --> 00:16:27,091 It's a waste of time. I had a stroke. You can't keep wasting time. 309 00:16:27,216 --> 00:16:28,384 We were tested for the Peace Corps. 310 00:16:28,509 --> 00:16:29,802 Ten years ago. 311 00:16:29,927 --> 00:16:32,430 You haven't been with your wife every minute of every day. 312 00:16:32,555 --> 00:16:34,640 You think I'm naive, don't you? 313 00:16:34,765 --> 00:16:37,643 I think you're... Yeah. 314 00:16:37,768 --> 00:16:38,978 I know my wife. 315 00:16:39,103 --> 00:16:40,187 She's not perfect. 316 00:16:40,313 --> 00:16:43,149 I'm not perfect. But she loves me. 317 00:16:44,692 --> 00:16:50,239 And she's always loved me. Every minute, every day. 318 00:16:53,534 --> 00:16:55,911 (PLAYING BLUES MUSIC) 319 00:16:59,582 --> 00:17:00,583 (KNOCKING ON DOOR) 320 00:17:04,879 --> 00:17:07,131 You're 15 minutes late. 321 00:17:10,134 --> 00:17:12,219 Have you heard the good news? 322 00:17:12,345 --> 00:17:14,597 Miley Cyrus is playing a third night at the Spectrum? 323 00:17:14,722 --> 00:17:16,599 Happiness is possible. 324 00:17:16,724 --> 00:17:18,893 And not just in this life but in the next. Where you can... 325 00:17:19,018 --> 00:17:22,980 Oh, you're selling religion! I'm sorry, I bought some Islam yesterday. 326 00:17:23,356 --> 00:17:25,816 Well, it's where your light showed signs before mending... 327 00:17:25,941 --> 00:17:27,276 MAN: Have a good evening. 328 00:17:27,568 --> 00:17:29,111 - You're late. - Fifteen minutes. 329 00:17:29,236 --> 00:17:31,405 Sixteen minutes. My sixteen minutes. 330 00:17:31,530 --> 00:17:34,158 So keep him an extra sixteen minutes. 331 00:17:34,283 --> 00:17:35,785 You hear that? She doesn't care. 332 00:17:35,910 --> 00:17:38,829 You're going mini-golfing, what's it matter? You've got a tee-off time? 333 00:17:38,954 --> 00:17:41,207 It matters because you don't get to decide what matters. 334 00:17:41,332 --> 00:17:44,126 It was my fault. I had to take a shower. 335 00:17:44,251 --> 00:17:46,837 Which was my fault. 336 00:17:46,962 --> 00:17:48,255 I have to take a dump. 337 00:17:48,381 --> 00:17:51,967 Anything else I don't need to know before you leave? 338 00:17:54,053 --> 00:17:57,848 Have fun on your play date. You've got mommy's numbers, right? 339 00:17:59,141 --> 00:18:00,935 Daddy needs a drink. 340 00:18:08,901 --> 00:18:11,320 I was thinking, if we discount the niceness issue... 341 00:18:11,445 --> 00:18:12,780 Sit down. 342 00:18:17,410 --> 00:18:19,704 - I think it's a heart defect. - Nothing on the echo. 343 00:18:19,829 --> 00:18:22,665 Could be a patent foramen ovale. Explains the stroke and the syncope 344 00:18:22,790 --> 00:18:25,126 and a PFO wouldn't show up on a routine echo. 345 00:18:25,251 --> 00:18:26,460 I'm going to do a bubble test. 346 00:18:26,585 --> 00:18:28,254 You got a minute, first? 347 00:18:29,547 --> 00:18:31,048 Sure. 348 00:18:32,258 --> 00:18:35,219 I think you've shown remarkable strength in a difficult situation. 349 00:18:35,344 --> 00:18:38,013 Are you giving me a performance review? 350 00:18:38,139 --> 00:18:39,098 A good one. 351 00:18:39,223 --> 00:18:42,143 I'm gonna do a bubble test. 352 00:18:42,268 --> 00:18:45,604 There was enough blood left over from his admission work up to run the VDRL. 353 00:18:45,730 --> 00:18:46,564 You doubted your patient? 354 00:18:46,689 --> 00:18:49,900 No, what I thought didn't matter. 355 00:18:50,025 --> 00:18:52,820 House said he wouldn't let us go on until we ruled out neurosyphilis. 356 00:18:52,945 --> 00:18:54,905 It's not neurosyphilis, it's a PFO. 357 00:18:55,030 --> 00:18:58,451 It's neurosyphilis. The tests were positive. 358 00:19:06,876 --> 00:19:09,545 It's always the same conversation. They tell you you must be mistaken, 359 00:19:09,670 --> 00:19:13,132 which is why I always run the tests twice. Then they blame the other guy. 360 00:19:13,257 --> 00:19:14,800 Which makes sense if they're innocent. 361 00:19:14,925 --> 00:19:16,510 But, obviously, half of them aren't. 362 00:19:16,635 --> 00:19:19,930 They don't seem to get that they're busted. Scientifically proven. 363 00:19:20,055 --> 00:19:21,766 Unless your spouse cheated, too. 364 00:19:21,891 --> 00:19:24,602 Exactly. That's what you're praying for in that moment, that she cheated, too. 365 00:19:24,727 --> 00:19:26,729 And then, if she doesn't kill you, you know that she did. 366 00:19:26,854 --> 00:19:28,230 You'd know she betrayed you. 367 00:19:28,355 --> 00:19:31,817 And then you realize that that sucks worse. 368 00:19:35,863 --> 00:19:37,031 (CLEARS THROAT) 369 00:19:37,656 --> 00:19:39,033 The test must be wrong. 370 00:19:39,158 --> 00:19:41,035 I ran it twice. 371 00:19:41,160 --> 00:19:44,538 Not that test. The one I took 10 years ago. 372 00:19:45,539 --> 00:19:48,042 What other explanation is there? 373 00:19:58,219 --> 00:20:00,012 He really sees no other possibility. 374 00:20:00,137 --> 00:20:02,014 Did you have an affair? 375 00:20:02,139 --> 00:20:02,973 No. 376 00:20:03,098 --> 00:20:04,850 Then why aren't you angry with him? 377 00:20:09,355 --> 00:20:11,690 You ever know anybody who's just too nice? 378 00:20:11,816 --> 00:20:13,776 - No. - It's annoying. 379 00:20:13,984 --> 00:20:15,444 Then you realize it's annoying 380 00:20:15,569 --> 00:20:17,863 because they remind you of what you're not, 381 00:20:17,988 --> 00:20:21,075 that you'll never be as good as they are. 382 00:20:21,200 --> 00:20:24,703 And then you think, why can't I? 383 00:20:24,829 --> 00:20:27,456 And before you know it, 384 00:20:27,581 --> 00:20:30,417 that naive idiot you laughed at 385 00:20:32,169 --> 00:20:34,713 has made you a better person. 386 00:20:36,465 --> 00:20:42,304 You really think I've been in love all these years with a symptom? 387 00:20:43,013 --> 00:20:44,974 If syphilis caused lesions in his brain, 388 00:20:45,099 --> 00:20:48,018 and the lesions caused personality changes... 389 00:20:48,143 --> 00:20:51,814 You may notice a change in him, as his condition improves. 390 00:20:53,274 --> 00:20:56,026 I know my husband. He's not going to change. 391 00:20:56,986 --> 00:20:59,154 You should get yourself tested. 392 00:21:02,658 --> 00:21:04,368 So much for the bell curve. 393 00:21:04,493 --> 00:21:06,912 How can House be an ass without it being an illness, 394 00:21:07,037 --> 00:21:08,914 but niceness is a biological crime? 395 00:21:09,164 --> 00:21:10,875 You got five bucks? 396 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:12,376 Yeah... 397 00:21:14,753 --> 00:21:18,883 Niceness just cost you five bucks, being an ass generally turns a profit. 398 00:21:19,300 --> 00:21:22,970 Kutner, could you excuse us? I need to do Taub's review. 399 00:21:23,095 --> 00:21:24,763 You can stay. 400 00:21:24,972 --> 00:21:27,474 I think it'd be better if this was done privately. 401 00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:28,976 This isn't going to be done. 402 00:21:29,101 --> 00:21:30,936 What is it with you guys? I've given you advice before. 403 00:21:31,061 --> 00:21:32,396 Not as our boss. 404 00:21:32,521 --> 00:21:34,607 What's the difference? Advice is advice. 405 00:21:34,815 --> 00:21:36,358 Fair enough. I'll go first. 406 00:21:36,483 --> 00:21:37,443 (CLEARS THROAT) 407 00:21:38,193 --> 00:21:40,696 "You demonstrate a great air of confidence, 408 00:21:40,821 --> 00:21:42,156 which is really pissing me off." 409 00:21:42,281 --> 00:21:44,033 - House authorized me to... - How long have you known him? 410 00:21:44,158 --> 00:21:45,576 - He's using you. - I volunteered because 411 00:21:45,701 --> 00:21:46,577 - I knew he wouldn't... - He could care less 412 00:21:46,702 --> 00:21:48,996 about the paperwork. He's using you to screw with you. 413 00:21:49,121 --> 00:21:51,582 He knows it'll annoy us, we'll stand up to you, 414 00:21:51,707 --> 00:21:53,000 which will force you to confront the fact that 415 00:21:53,125 --> 00:21:54,376 even though you think you're our superior, 416 00:21:54,501 --> 00:21:55,711 you're no different from us. 417 00:21:55,836 --> 00:21:59,173 He gave you authority, to keep you in your place. 418 00:22:00,132 --> 00:22:03,510 - It's true. - Thanks. 419 00:22:03,636 --> 00:22:04,511 Not him. What did he say? 420 00:22:04,637 --> 00:22:06,055 Nothing. What's true? 421 00:22:06,180 --> 00:22:07,890 If there's something wrong with this guy, 422 00:22:08,015 --> 00:22:11,101 it means there's something wrong with House. 423 00:22:17,483 --> 00:22:20,069 Are you trying to get me drunk? 424 00:22:20,194 --> 00:22:21,320 (WILSON CHUCKLES) 425 00:22:22,863 --> 00:22:24,698 - What time is it? - 10:30. 426 00:22:24,823 --> 00:22:25,950 (EXCLAIMS) 427 00:22:26,158 --> 00:22:26,992 She'll kill you. 428 00:22:27,117 --> 00:22:29,536 I'll get you home before lights out. 429 00:22:29,662 --> 00:22:35,209 Great, then she'll kill me. If I get any more drunk... 430 00:22:36,460 --> 00:22:39,505 It might not work. 431 00:22:41,298 --> 00:22:43,676 If you know what I mean. 432 00:22:43,801 --> 00:22:45,678 Really? 433 00:22:45,928 --> 00:22:49,682 You'd think one or more of your ex-wives would have mentioned that to me. 434 00:22:49,807 --> 00:22:52,059 They told you? Wait. 435 00:22:52,184 --> 00:22:54,770 Why do you want to get Amber angry? 436 00:22:54,895 --> 00:22:56,188 Because I'm your friend. 437 00:22:56,313 --> 00:22:58,232 No, no, no, you said you approved. 438 00:22:58,357 --> 00:23:00,192 (CELL PHONE RINGING) You said you were taking the high road. 439 00:23:00,317 --> 00:23:02,027 For how long, the first exit? 440 00:23:02,152 --> 00:23:06,407 Hello, and thank you from saving me from being righteous to death. 441 00:23:06,532 --> 00:23:07,783 THIRTEEN: Patient's vomiting blood. 442 00:23:07,908 --> 00:23:08,951 Hematemesis could indicate... 443 00:23:09,076 --> 00:23:10,911 HOUSE: Don't put it on the board. 444 00:23:11,036 --> 00:23:12,079 You don't think it's a symptom? 445 00:23:12,204 --> 00:23:14,164 I think it's my marker. 446 00:23:14,289 --> 00:23:16,000 HOUSE: He has syph and what? 447 00:23:16,125 --> 00:23:18,585 And syph. It can cause hematemesis. 448 00:23:18,711 --> 00:23:21,296 Not everyone agrees. 449 00:23:21,422 --> 00:23:22,715 How could you... 450 00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:24,675 Because if you all thought it was just syph 451 00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:26,969 you wouldn't have woken me up in the middle of the night. 452 00:23:27,094 --> 00:23:28,804 If it was just syph, he wouldn't be getting worse. 453 00:23:28,929 --> 00:23:30,097 He's already on penicillin. 454 00:23:30,222 --> 00:23:31,724 The bleeding's probably from liver damage, 455 00:23:31,849 --> 00:23:35,477 probably caused by ethanol in the cleansers or the penicillin. 456 00:23:35,602 --> 00:23:38,313 Two more probablies than I like to hear. 457 00:23:38,439 --> 00:23:40,858 Liver test and serologies, are going to take a full day. 458 00:23:40,983 --> 00:23:42,568 Full night, actually. 459 00:23:42,693 --> 00:23:44,153 Guy might not make it to brunch. 460 00:23:47,322 --> 00:23:50,743 Yes, I knew about your issue with alcohol. 461 00:23:50,868 --> 00:23:52,911 Yes, I intentionally got you drunk 462 00:23:53,037 --> 00:23:54,747 to provoke an argument, between you and Amber. 463 00:23:54,872 --> 00:23:57,708 And why I'd do such a thing is an interesting question. 464 00:23:57,833 --> 00:24:00,669 But what's more interesting is that you knew as much as I did, 465 00:24:00,961 --> 00:24:04,882 and you're the one who's pouring down the drinks. Why? 466 00:24:05,299 --> 00:24:07,760 Because I thought I was out having fun with a friend. 467 00:24:07,885 --> 00:24:11,138 I didn't know the drinks had subtext. 468 00:24:11,263 --> 00:24:14,266 I gotta get home. 469 00:24:17,478 --> 00:24:19,938 GGT's normal, that rules out alcohol. 470 00:24:20,064 --> 00:24:21,440 TAUB: What about serum protein? 471 00:24:21,565 --> 00:24:22,649 It's positive. 472 00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:24,777 Kind of assumed he had protein. 473 00:24:24,902 --> 00:24:26,904 It's how much protein he has that we care about. 474 00:24:27,029 --> 00:24:28,822 He's positive for syphilis. 475 00:24:28,947 --> 00:24:31,617 Do you mind if I give you a performance review? 476 00:24:31,742 --> 00:24:36,705 Not the patient. House. He has syphilis. 477 00:24:44,630 --> 00:24:45,672 What happened? 478 00:24:46,715 --> 00:24:50,260 Every time I searched my soul, I found Anna. 479 00:24:51,053 --> 00:24:52,930 Are you going to tell Marie? 480 00:24:53,055 --> 00:24:54,598 I have to. 481 00:24:54,723 --> 00:24:56,058 WOMAN ON TV: It will destroy her! 482 00:24:57,059 --> 00:24:58,769 MAN ON TV: Will it be any worse... 483 00:25:00,687 --> 00:25:02,606 Yes? 484 00:25:02,731 --> 00:25:04,942 You might want to turn off the TV. 485 00:25:05,067 --> 00:25:09,321 I'm multitasking. Also doing my taxes. And Cuddy. 486 00:25:09,446 --> 00:25:10,739 What did you find out? 487 00:25:10,864 --> 00:25:12,825 Patient has hepatitis. 488 00:25:12,950 --> 00:25:15,828 I assume from your omission of the word "viral" before the "hep" 489 00:25:15,953 --> 00:25:17,788 that it's not another STD. 490 00:25:17,913 --> 00:25:20,791 Put him on steroids and test him for sarcoid before the liver failure 491 00:25:20,916 --> 00:25:23,627 becomes liver failed. 492 00:25:23,752 --> 00:25:25,963 We're all doing this. 493 00:25:26,964 --> 00:25:29,258 There's more? 494 00:25:29,758 --> 00:25:31,552 You have syphilis. 495 00:25:31,969 --> 00:25:33,971 MAN ON TV: Love lasts forever. 496 00:25:39,434 --> 00:25:41,019 No, I don't. 497 00:25:41,145 --> 00:25:42,813 One of us found a vial of your blood in the lab from when we... 498 00:25:42,938 --> 00:25:44,648 Which one of you? 499 00:25:44,773 --> 00:25:46,275 It's treatable. 500 00:25:48,110 --> 00:25:50,654 We filled a prescription. 501 00:25:58,120 --> 00:26:00,038 You Okay? 502 00:26:22,352 --> 00:26:25,731 So, this is why he is who he is. 503 00:26:25,856 --> 00:26:26,857 We don't know. 504 00:26:26,982 --> 00:26:29,860 We know. It's not just a coincidence. 505 00:26:29,985 --> 00:26:31,403 Wilson says he's always been a jerk. 506 00:26:31,528 --> 00:26:32,613 But he got worse. 507 00:26:32,821 --> 00:26:33,822 After his leg. 508 00:26:33,947 --> 00:26:35,532 The leg was a coincidence. 509 00:26:35,782 --> 00:26:38,160 Did you sleep with him? 510 00:26:42,998 --> 00:26:45,792 So what's going to happen? What's gonna change? 511 00:26:45,918 --> 00:26:46,877 Maybe he'll be less of a jerk. 512 00:26:47,002 --> 00:26:48,629 Or less of a doctor. 513 00:26:48,754 --> 00:26:50,172 You gotta be a jerk to be a good doctor? 514 00:26:50,297 --> 00:26:51,882 I don't know. Maybe House does. 515 00:26:52,007 --> 00:26:53,508 Why aren't you answering me? 516 00:26:53,634 --> 00:26:56,011 Because it's none of their business. 517 00:26:57,679 --> 00:26:58,931 It's none of your business. 518 00:26:59,056 --> 00:27:02,601 I think the STD makes it my business. 519 00:27:05,562 --> 00:27:07,105 Humans are complicated. 520 00:27:07,231 --> 00:27:08,482 Humans are simple. 521 00:27:08,607 --> 00:27:10,317 A million different things make us who we are. 522 00:27:10,442 --> 00:27:12,486 You change one, you change everything. 523 00:27:12,611 --> 00:27:16,114 If Mozart was better adjusted, 524 00:27:16,240 --> 00:27:19,409 decides to play catch one day, maybe there's no Magic Flute. 525 00:27:24,289 --> 00:27:27,292 You did, didn't you? 526 00:27:30,921 --> 00:27:32,714 Something I need to tell you. 527 00:27:32,839 --> 00:27:34,883 AMBER: You returned him drunk. 528 00:27:36,009 --> 00:27:38,136 - On time. - Drunk. 529 00:27:38,262 --> 00:27:40,514 On time. No tag backs. 530 00:27:40,639 --> 00:27:42,933 The purpose of the time was to give me time. 531 00:27:43,058 --> 00:27:44,101 So you didn't have sex... 532 00:27:44,226 --> 00:27:46,353 - I like sex. - You can have it tonight. 533 00:27:46,478 --> 00:27:48,021 The L Word is on. 534 00:27:48,146 --> 00:27:50,816 You don't get to decide what matters. 535 00:27:50,941 --> 00:27:54,695 Either you're genuinely afraid I'm gonna make him miserable, 536 00:27:54,820 --> 00:27:58,949 or you're afraid I'm gonna make him happy, or you simply can't stop screwing 537 00:27:59,074 --> 00:28:01,034 with anything that moves. it doesn't really matter because, 538 00:28:01,159 --> 00:28:02,327 whatever the reason, 539 00:28:02,452 --> 00:28:08,125 you'll only get worse. Until either I stop seeing Wilson 540 00:28:08,250 --> 00:28:10,669 or I stop you. 541 00:28:14,089 --> 00:28:16,091 What do you think I'm going to choose? 542 00:28:16,216 --> 00:28:19,094 If you terminate the agreement, that's not gonna bring peace to the Mideast. 543 00:28:19,219 --> 00:28:21,346 I'm not terminating the agreement. 544 00:28:21,471 --> 00:28:24,182 I'm amending the agreement. 545 00:28:24,933 --> 00:28:26,893 I'm adding penalty clauses. 546 00:28:27,019 --> 00:28:30,605 Fine. Whoever violates it gets their finger cut off. 547 00:28:30,731 --> 00:28:32,482 - I'm serious. - So am I. 548 00:28:32,607 --> 00:28:33,859 You want people to drive safer, 549 00:28:33,984 --> 00:28:36,945 take out the airbags and attach a machete pointing at their neck. 550 00:28:37,070 --> 00:28:39,406 No one will drive over three miles per hour. 551 00:28:39,531 --> 00:28:40,782 - I'm not cutting... - We'll figure it out. 552 00:28:40,907 --> 00:28:42,617 On your time. 553 00:28:45,829 --> 00:28:46,830 (SIGHS) 554 00:28:53,378 --> 00:28:58,383 You know she's certifiable, right? I got forms in my desk. 555 00:28:59,760 --> 00:29:01,511 Where is she wrong? 556 00:29:02,888 --> 00:29:05,182 What were you going to tell me? 557 00:29:05,599 --> 00:29:06,725 Nothing. 558 00:29:06,850 --> 00:29:09,144 You're punishing me? 559 00:29:09,353 --> 00:29:13,732 I needed to tell you something privately. 560 00:29:13,857 --> 00:29:15,567 I'm not gonna tell her. 561 00:29:15,692 --> 00:29:18,820 You'll tell her. She's your girlfriend. You should tell her. 562 00:29:18,945 --> 00:29:20,405 You're my friend. 563 00:29:20,530 --> 00:29:21,531 It's not the same. 564 00:29:22,908 --> 00:29:24,701 Don't sulk. 565 00:29:26,828 --> 00:29:28,622 Where am I wrong? 566 00:29:29,664 --> 00:29:30,665 (DOOR CLOSES) 567 00:29:32,709 --> 00:29:35,420 "Your management style is counterproductive. 568 00:29:35,545 --> 00:29:38,090 "You gave me authority over the team just so they could undercut..." 569 00:29:38,215 --> 00:29:40,926 Critiquing the clap-addled? 570 00:29:41,051 --> 00:29:42,552 Sort of tasteless. 571 00:29:42,677 --> 00:29:45,347 I don't feel like waiting until your genitals cleared up. 572 00:29:45,472 --> 00:29:47,641 You need to formalize my authority over the team. 573 00:29:48,058 --> 00:29:49,184 No, I don't. 574 00:29:49,309 --> 00:29:51,019 You don't think I'm qualified? 575 00:29:51,144 --> 00:29:52,896 Compared to those three? 576 00:29:53,021 --> 00:29:54,815 You want to punish Cuddy for hiring me without... 577 00:29:54,940 --> 00:29:56,817 I like Cuddy. 578 00:29:56,942 --> 00:29:58,819 Parts of her. 579 00:29:58,944 --> 00:30:00,654 You want to crush the team, by crushing me? 580 00:30:00,779 --> 00:30:02,989 I want to empower them. 581 00:30:03,907 --> 00:30:06,660 Those three idiots need to respect you. 582 00:30:06,785 --> 00:30:09,996 They should respect you. They should be afraid of you. 583 00:30:10,122 --> 00:30:11,581 So I have to humiliate you. 584 00:30:11,706 --> 00:30:13,625 See, if the team fears you, they won't question you, 585 00:30:13,750 --> 00:30:15,335 if they don't question you, they won't get any answers, 586 00:30:15,460 --> 00:30:17,671 if they don't get any answers, they're useless. 587 00:30:17,796 --> 00:30:19,131 Mocking me saves lives? 588 00:30:19,256 --> 00:30:21,842 Hospital will probably build you a statue one day. 589 00:30:22,134 --> 00:30:24,219 You know, with a "kick me" sign, on the back. 590 00:30:24,344 --> 00:30:26,096 So when you think about it, the more I mock you, 591 00:30:26,221 --> 00:30:27,848 the more it shows that I have respect for you. 592 00:30:27,973 --> 00:30:31,476 Or you made up that B.S. because you like humiliating me. 593 00:30:31,601 --> 00:30:33,979 Wouldn't rule that out completely. 594 00:30:34,104 --> 00:30:35,230 YOU busy? 595 00:30:35,355 --> 00:30:36,690 Almost done. 596 00:30:36,815 --> 00:30:43,238 So just remember, the rabbit goes around the tree and jumps down the hole. 597 00:30:44,865 --> 00:30:47,033 Negative for sarcoidosis. 598 00:30:49,286 --> 00:30:51,079 Run him for everything you can think of. 599 00:30:51,329 --> 00:30:55,959 Lepto, schisto, hemo and the fourth Marx Brother nobody ever heard of. 600 00:30:57,961 --> 00:30:59,212 You bitch! 601 00:31:02,007 --> 00:31:04,259 I just went to get us some lunch. You were asleep. 602 00:31:04,384 --> 00:31:06,178 You moved my book! 603 00:31:07,137 --> 00:31:09,806 Jeff, calm down, it's just the drugs. 604 00:31:09,931 --> 00:31:12,559 The drugs didn't move my... 605 00:31:12,684 --> 00:31:13,560 (JEFF GASPS) 606 00:31:13,685 --> 00:31:15,187 Jeff? 607 00:31:15,312 --> 00:31:16,813 (MACHINES BEEPING RAPIDLY) 608 00:31:16,938 --> 00:31:20,275 My husband's having a heart attack! Can somebody help me, please? 609 00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,112 Somebody help me, please! 610 00:31:26,490 --> 00:31:28,033 (HEART MONITOR FLAT LINES) 611 00:31:32,996 --> 00:31:34,831 She saved his life. 612 00:31:35,207 --> 00:31:38,793 Or she scabbed. Depends on your point of view. 613 00:31:38,919 --> 00:31:43,381 So, what do we think? New symptom? Or just a wife beater? 614 00:31:44,591 --> 00:31:45,592 Hey. 615 00:31:46,426 --> 00:31:49,262 Time for you to take this baby for a spin. 616 00:31:52,599 --> 00:31:56,394 We loaded him full of prednisone to try to fix the liver. 617 00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:59,689 Good news is, he's running out of organs to fail. 618 00:31:59,814 --> 00:32:03,985 Prednisone could cause roid rage, which could cause hypertension, 619 00:32:04,110 --> 00:32:05,153 which results... 620 00:32:05,278 --> 00:32:06,863 Roid rage after six hours? 621 00:32:06,988 --> 00:32:10,158 That rate, by sundown, he'll have eaten most of us. 622 00:32:12,661 --> 00:32:15,664 Still could be the penicillin, allergic reaction. 623 00:32:15,789 --> 00:32:17,082 How does a fried liver put him into a rage? 624 00:32:17,207 --> 00:32:19,584 It's not frying his liver, it's frying his syphilis. 625 00:32:19,709 --> 00:32:22,420 The penicillin's working. The real patient's emerging. 626 00:32:22,546 --> 00:32:26,174 So syphilis prevents domestic violence. 627 00:32:26,299 --> 00:32:28,593 I'm gonna be even more attractive to the ladies. 628 00:32:28,718 --> 00:32:30,971 I was going to test for a heart issue before the syphilis. 629 00:32:31,096 --> 00:32:32,514 PFO could explain the heart attack, 630 00:32:32,639 --> 00:32:36,434 and reduced blood flow to the brain could explain the rage. 631 00:32:36,560 --> 00:32:39,229 Well, they're all good ideas. 632 00:32:39,354 --> 00:32:40,605 Okay. Let's take a vote. 633 00:32:40,730 --> 00:32:43,483 How many think it's the roids talking? 634 00:32:44,276 --> 00:32:46,611 And who's for the penicillin? 635 00:32:46,736 --> 00:32:49,739 And how about whatever she said? 636 00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:54,619 Someone hasn't raised their hand. 637 00:32:56,413 --> 00:32:58,498 Whatever I decide? 638 00:32:59,291 --> 00:33:01,042 You're setting me up. 639 00:33:01,167 --> 00:33:03,378 Why would I do that? 640 00:33:06,047 --> 00:33:07,507 PFO. 641 00:33:09,593 --> 00:33:10,927 'V : have it. 642 00:33:12,387 --> 00:33:16,391 I just hope the bubble test is positive. Or it's no more Mr. Nice Guy. 643 00:33:23,315 --> 00:33:26,651 (CLATTERING) 644 00:33:26,776 --> 00:33:30,864 We gave van Gogh chelation therapy. Turned him into a house painter. 645 00:33:31,281 --> 00:33:35,285 Maybe not. Maybe we just put Hitler on Ritalin. 646 00:33:35,744 --> 00:33:37,704 Are you comparing House to Hitler? 647 00:33:37,829 --> 00:33:38,872 Oh, God. 648 00:33:39,331 --> 00:33:42,334 Just because I don't think he's Hitler doesn't mean I slept with him. 649 00:33:42,459 --> 00:33:45,629 I don't sleep with everyone who's better than Hitler. 650 00:33:45,754 --> 00:33:49,507 Maybe Taub's right. Maybe this is good. 651 00:33:49,633 --> 00:33:50,884 This is not good. 652 00:33:51,009 --> 00:33:55,639 He respected our opinions, he mocked himself, he was civil, he shared. 653 00:33:55,930 --> 00:33:57,349 He didn't care. 654 00:33:57,474 --> 00:33:58,308 He never cares. 655 00:33:58,516 --> 00:34:02,187 He didn't vote. He always cared about one thing, 656 00:34:02,312 --> 00:34:03,688 solving the puzzle. 657 00:34:03,813 --> 00:34:07,400 But he was irrelevant in that diagnosis, he had no opinion of his own. 658 00:34:07,525 --> 00:34:10,987 He now cares about nothing. 659 00:34:11,112 --> 00:34:15,450 You had no choice, you had to treat him. What's done is done. 660 00:34:24,459 --> 00:34:28,254 You know that thing I was going to tell you? I gotta tell you. 661 00:34:28,797 --> 00:34:32,425 I gotta tell someone. You have to swear not to tell C.B. 662 00:34:33,259 --> 00:34:35,512 - Whatever. - That's not swearing, that's shrugging. 663 00:34:35,637 --> 00:34:37,555 It's actually the opposite of swearing. 664 00:34:37,681 --> 00:34:39,307 I won't tell Amber. 665 00:34:45,438 --> 00:34:48,650 My team thinks that I have syphilis. 666 00:34:49,442 --> 00:34:51,152 - Do you? - Not yet. 667 00:34:51,903 --> 00:34:53,446 Why do they think you do? 668 00:34:53,571 --> 00:34:56,282 Because I knew they had access to an old blood sample. 669 00:34:56,408 --> 00:34:58,535 I knew they'd test it sometime for something. 670 00:34:58,660 --> 00:35:01,121 Why would you swap your blood? What are you afraid they'll find? 671 00:35:01,246 --> 00:35:05,417 Shut up, you're missing the point. Now they think that I'm on penicillin. 672 00:35:06,793 --> 00:35:09,629 Is this some clever practical joke that I'm not aware of? 673 00:35:09,754 --> 00:35:13,174 And as I get better, I get nicer. 674 00:35:18,555 --> 00:35:19,764 That's brilliant. 675 00:35:19,889 --> 00:35:22,517 Foreman thinks I actually value his opinion. 676 00:35:22,642 --> 00:35:26,062 Thank God he said PFO or I'd have had to do some dancing. 677 00:35:26,187 --> 00:35:27,397 You got time for bowling? 678 00:35:29,733 --> 00:35:32,444 Come on, it's work hours. 679 00:35:32,569 --> 00:35:34,779 I'll get my shoes. 680 00:35:36,865 --> 00:35:39,576 - So we don't need to talk about... - No. 681 00:35:39,701 --> 00:35:41,202 - You're gonna keep screwing... - Yeah. 682 00:35:41,828 --> 00:35:44,622 And you're gonna keep talking about it. We are who we are. 683 00:35:46,166 --> 00:35:47,542 I'll get my shoes. 684 00:35:49,627 --> 00:35:53,173 Okay, got a good view of the heart. 685 00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:59,262 What if we lower House's dosage? Maybe stabilize him? 686 00:35:59,387 --> 00:36:01,514 He doesn't get worse, he doesn't get better. 687 00:36:01,639 --> 00:36:04,768 Quite the line to walk. If we're wrong, he dies of neurosyphilis. 688 00:36:04,893 --> 00:36:06,519 If we don't, other people die. 689 00:36:06,644 --> 00:36:08,605 Other people who aren't our boss. 690 00:36:08,730 --> 00:36:09,981 People. 691 00:36:10,607 --> 00:36:12,984 This sucks. The guy had a gift. I killed... 692 00:36:15,320 --> 00:36:17,655 - Hi. What... - House doesn't have syphilis. 693 00:36:17,781 --> 00:36:19,616 He switched the blood samples. 694 00:36:20,408 --> 00:36:21,409 How do you know that? 695 00:36:21,534 --> 00:36:22,660 House told Wilson. 696 00:36:22,786 --> 00:36:25,622 I wanted to ruin House's day. See you. 697 00:36:27,582 --> 00:36:29,584 - We're idiots. - We're not idiots. 698 00:36:29,709 --> 00:36:31,377 Positive blood test means positive blood test. 699 00:36:31,503 --> 00:36:32,796 Apparently not. 700 00:36:33,588 --> 00:36:35,590 There they are. Let's see if they... 701 00:36:35,715 --> 00:36:37,842 What are you doing? We're not done. 702 00:36:37,967 --> 00:36:39,594 He doesn't have syphilis. 703 00:36:40,345 --> 00:36:41,429 I know. 704 00:36:48,728 --> 00:36:52,023 KUTNER: Patient tested positive for syphilis, right? 705 00:36:52,649 --> 00:36:54,025 Is this some sort of recap? 706 00:36:54,150 --> 00:36:56,736 But why did he test positive for syphilis? 707 00:36:56,861 --> 00:36:58,863 Oh, oh, I know this. 708 00:36:59,072 --> 00:37:01,032 Either, one, he has syphilis. 709 00:37:01,366 --> 00:37:02,242 I was gonna say that. 710 00:37:02,367 --> 00:37:04,369 Or two, the test was wrong twice. 711 00:37:04,494 --> 00:37:07,872 Or three, he gave us someone else's blood. 712 00:37:14,420 --> 00:37:16,381 - Who? - Amber. 713 00:37:18,633 --> 00:37:22,720 Get that idiotic smile out of my face, I gotta go on a killing spree. 714 00:37:23,012 --> 00:37:26,808 Or four, he has something that tests positive for syphilis. 715 00:37:28,184 --> 00:37:29,894 - It's not Chagas. - He worked in Costa Rica, 716 00:37:30,019 --> 00:37:31,062 before he was married. 717 00:37:31,437 --> 00:37:33,857 Is two a spree or do I have to kill you too? 718 00:37:34,315 --> 00:37:35,942 Chagas wouldn't explain the niceness. 719 00:37:36,067 --> 00:37:40,321 I've heard of remote tribes that actually practice acts of kindness. 720 00:37:40,446 --> 00:37:43,074 Or the Chagas caused encephalitis. 721 00:37:43,199 --> 00:37:44,325 The MRI showed no signs... 722 00:37:44,450 --> 00:37:47,203 Until we started him on steroids, compromised the immune system 723 00:37:47,328 --> 00:37:48,621 and let the infection flare up. 724 00:37:48,746 --> 00:37:52,292 I did another one. It's not much. 725 00:37:55,295 --> 00:37:56,921 It's plenty. 726 00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:01,968 You figured this out because I don't have syphilis? 727 00:38:03,720 --> 00:38:04,762 Damn. 728 00:38:06,389 --> 00:38:08,850 It should have been my epiphany. 729 00:38:12,312 --> 00:38:14,147 Good news and bad news. 730 00:38:15,023 --> 00:38:17,984 Good news is, we know what you have, 731 00:38:18,109 --> 00:38:21,821 it's treatable, and you're going to live. 732 00:38:22,530 --> 00:38:24,240 Really? 733 00:38:24,365 --> 00:38:25,450 What's the bad news? 734 00:38:25,575 --> 00:38:28,953 The cure is a grueling course of pills. 735 00:38:29,078 --> 00:38:30,163 It's like 736 00:38:30,288 --> 00:38:33,583 one a day for a month. 737 00:38:33,708 --> 00:38:35,752 Now you're just trying to make me laugh. 738 00:38:35,877 --> 00:38:37,837 Yeah, like that's a challenge. 739 00:38:37,962 --> 00:38:39,464 You have Chagas disease. 740 00:38:39,589 --> 00:38:42,634 It's a parasite. It's been asymptomatic for 10 years. 741 00:38:42,759 --> 00:38:45,845 Not quite. Your brain's been swollen, not enough to see, 742 00:38:45,970 --> 00:38:47,513 but enough to alter your personality. 743 00:38:47,639 --> 00:38:48,765 We're back to that? 744 00:38:48,890 --> 00:38:51,309 He screamed at you, you don't think he can change? 745 00:38:51,434 --> 00:38:54,062 That was because of the drugs. 746 00:38:54,187 --> 00:38:57,398 So you think drugs are more powerful than parasites? 747 00:38:57,523 --> 00:39:00,318 I mean, the ones we're gonna give you to treat the parasites obviously are, 748 00:39:00,443 --> 00:39:03,947 but I stand by the principle. 749 00:39:04,072 --> 00:39:06,199 (JEFF BREATHES DEEPLY) 750 00:39:09,535 --> 00:39:11,871 I'm not worried. 751 00:39:11,996 --> 00:39:12,997 Neither am I. 752 00:39:15,208 --> 00:39:18,294 Neither am I. But that's because I don't care. 753 00:39:34,227 --> 00:39:35,228 Reviews? 754 00:39:35,353 --> 00:39:38,064 It was brought to my attention that, on occasion, 755 00:39:38,189 --> 00:39:40,316 I am not respectful of hospital hierarchy. 756 00:39:40,441 --> 00:39:42,568 The word was "contemptuous." 757 00:39:49,242 --> 00:39:51,953 Well phrased, thoughtful... 758 00:39:55,039 --> 00:39:58,209 identically phrased. These are all the same. 759 00:39:58,334 --> 00:40:02,755 Because underneath it all, we are all the same. 760 00:40:02,880 --> 00:40:06,217 And Foreman refused to type his up. 761 00:40:06,342 --> 00:40:07,635 Well, it's more than I expected. 762 00:40:08,386 --> 00:40:10,346 There's an extra one in there. 763 00:40:20,314 --> 00:40:23,443 "Your treatment of patients is nonexistent 764 00:40:23,568 --> 00:40:27,238 "because you're not a doctor, you're an administrator." 765 00:40:27,363 --> 00:40:29,782 Foreman convinced me that these could be helpful. 766 00:40:29,907 --> 00:40:31,826 "Your management of employees is, 767 00:40:31,951 --> 00:40:35,246 well, let's face it, they're outside carrying signs." 768 00:40:35,663 --> 00:40:39,083 The strike ended. The nurses have been back for two shifts already. 769 00:40:39,208 --> 00:40:42,378 You'd think I'd have noticed. What exactly did they do around here? 770 00:40:47,383 --> 00:40:52,722 "You act like employees should fear and respect you, but your eyes tell us... 771 00:40:52,847 --> 00:40:55,725 "Actually your eyes tell us nothing, because we're looking at your boobs, 772 00:40:55,850 --> 00:40:57,852 "which tell us that you're desperate to have someone jump on you 773 00:40:57,977 --> 00:41:01,606 "and tell you they love you one grunted syllable at a time. 774 00:41:01,731 --> 00:41:05,234 "What you want, you run away from. What you need, you don't have a clue. 775 00:41:05,359 --> 00:41:09,614 "What you've accomplished makes you proud. 776 00:41:09,739 --> 00:41:11,699 "But you're still miserable." 777 00:41:12,742 --> 00:41:14,494 Please sign. 778 00:41:16,996 --> 00:41:18,748 I got a call from Amber today. 779 00:41:18,873 --> 00:41:22,001 Says there's been a violation your contract. 780 00:41:22,126 --> 00:41:24,921 You've been seeing Wilson on her time. 781 00:41:25,046 --> 00:41:26,506 She breached confidentiality. 782 00:41:26,631 --> 00:41:29,759 You can let it slide, Officer, we're even. 783 00:41:29,884 --> 00:41:33,262 Yes, you are. You're both losing fingers. 784 00:41:36,641 --> 00:41:38,142 Look what I found. 785 00:41:38,267 --> 00:41:39,268 Nice. 786 00:41:42,939 --> 00:41:45,191 They think you might be able to come home tomorrow. 787 00:41:45,316 --> 00:41:47,026 Yeah? That's good. 788 00:41:50,279 --> 00:41:51,322 What's the matter? 789 00:41:51,447 --> 00:41:54,784 The ketchup. There's something wrong with that. 790 00:41:58,538 --> 00:42:01,332 Tastes fine. ls there anything else? 791 00:42:01,457 --> 00:42:03,167 Everything else is great. 792 00:42:03,292 --> 00:42:07,547 I just, I don't know, I guess I don't like ketchup anymore. 793 00:42:08,756 --> 00:42:11,008 Wonder what else I don't like. 794 00:42:29,193 --> 00:42:30,611 Roll over. 795 00:42:33,364 --> 00:42:35,116 We need a tougher punishment. 796 00:42:35,241 --> 00:42:37,994 You want to come over to the poopy side? 797 00:42:39,328 --> 00:42:42,206 So where are you two going Friday night? 798 00:42:42,331 --> 00:42:43,249 Dinner at L'Auberge. 799 00:42:47,044 --> 00:42:49,297 You're lying. 800 00:42:49,422 --> 00:42:50,381 Of course I am.