1
00:00:00,230 --> 00:00:05,235
So, you got a Green Beret,
a Navy SEAL and a sister from Brooklyn.
2
00:00:05,360 --> 00:00:08,238
The general hands
each of them a gun and says,
3
00:00:08,363 --> 00:00:11,742
"Your spouse is seated next door
in a room in a chair.
4
00:00:11,867 --> 00:00:15,203
"In order to pass this test,
you must go inside and kill them."
5
00:00:16,622 --> 00:00:18,165
Immediately
the Green Beret says,
6
00:00:18,290 --> 00:00:20,834
"No, sir, I could never kill my wife.
I just can't do it."
7
00:00:20,959 --> 00:00:22,919
The General looks at him
and says, "You know what?
8
00:00:23,045 --> 00:00:26,131
"You ain't got what it takes.
Take your wife and go on home."
9
00:00:26,256 --> 00:00:27,466
Navy Seal then heads in.
10
00:00:27,591 --> 00:00:30,385
Five minutes later, comes out,
tears strolling down his face.
11
00:00:30,510 --> 00:00:32,554
"I tried, I tried, I tried,
I just can't do it,
12
00:00:32,679 --> 00:00:35,015
"she looked so beautiful
in the chair, I can't do it."
13
00:00:35,140 --> 00:00:36,933
General looks at him and says,
"You know what?
14
00:00:37,059 --> 00:00:38,352
"You ain't got what it takes."
15
00:00:38,477 --> 00:00:41,897
Finally, sister from Brooklyn
strolls in with a swagger.
16
00:00:42,022 --> 00:00:43,190
(MIMICKING GUN FIRING)
17
00:00:43,315 --> 00:00:44,149
Shots rang out,
18
00:00:44,274 --> 00:00:46,026
there's banging, there's screaming,
it's going crazy!
19
00:00:46,151 --> 00:00:48,195
Suddenly,
everything goes silent.
20
00:00:49,529 --> 00:00:51,365
The General says,
"Well, what the hell happened inside?"
21
00:00:51,490 --> 00:00:52,783
The sister from Brooklyn
screams back,
22
00:00:52,908 --> 00:00:54,868
"The damn gun
had blanks in it,
23
00:00:54,993 --> 00:00:57,537
"so I had to beat him to death
with my bare..."
24
00:00:58,497 --> 00:00:59,665
What the hell?
25
00:00:59,790 --> 00:01:01,416
A little bit of warning
would have been nice!
26
00:01:01,541 --> 00:01:02,959
The sound of a saw
cutting a hole in the wall
27
00:01:03,085 --> 00:01:04,002
wasn't warning enough?
28
00:01:04,127 --> 00:01:04,961
Bite me.
29
00:01:08,548 --> 00:01:11,093
(MAN CHATTERING ON RADIO)
30
00:01:13,220 --> 00:01:15,013
(WOMAN CHATTERING ON RADIO)
31
00:01:15,138 --> 00:01:18,058
What, are you kidding me? Tub of Goo
there's gotta be over six bills.
32
00:01:18,183 --> 00:01:19,935
You ain't gonna lift him
with a couple of blankets.
33
00:01:20,060 --> 00:01:21,395
SMITH: You got a better idea,
Einstein?
34
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:23,063
Yeah, just roll him off.
35
00:01:24,106 --> 00:01:25,857
What? He's already dead,
it ain't like he's gonna feel it.
36
00:01:25,982 --> 00:01:27,359
How the hell's
a guy get that big?
37
00:01:27,484 --> 00:01:28,360
You roll him off
from this high,
38
00:01:28,485 --> 00:01:30,028
he's likely to go right
through the floor and take us with him.
39
00:01:30,153 --> 00:01:32,989
Are you ready?
All right, one, two, lift!
40
00:01:33,115 --> 00:01:34,408
(FARTING)
41
00:01:35,409 --> 00:01:36,368
Come on, man!
42
00:01:36,493 --> 00:01:37,869
Me? You're the kielbasa king.
43
00:01:37,994 --> 00:01:39,121
It wasn't me.
44
00:01:39,913 --> 00:01:41,748
Whoa, it wasn't me, either.
45
00:01:45,043 --> 00:01:46,461
Don't look at me.
46
00:01:50,298 --> 00:01:52,008
Please tell me
dead guys can fart.
47
00:01:52,134 --> 00:01:54,136
Of course. Dead bodies are full
of all sorts of gases.
48
00:01:54,261 --> 00:01:55,554
But a dead body
can't tighten a sphincter.
49
00:01:55,679 --> 00:01:57,222
You need a tight sphincter
to make a fart.
50
00:01:57,347 --> 00:01:58,765
No, you need a loose sphincter.
A tight sphincter...
51
00:01:58,890 --> 00:02:00,475
You check his femoral?
52
00:02:00,600 --> 00:02:03,353
No. He peed all over himself!
53
00:02:03,478 --> 00:02:06,022
Look, I've heard dead bodies
moan, groan, hiss,
54
00:02:06,148 --> 00:02:07,774
hell, I've even seen them
sit straight up on a gurney.
55
00:02:07,899 --> 00:02:11,236
Trust me, his skin's cold, pupils are
fixed and dilated, he's not breathing.
56
00:02:11,361 --> 00:02:13,238
- He's got a pulse!
- No way.
57
00:02:13,363 --> 00:02:15,991
All right, give me an Ambu bag and
an EKG. It's thready, but it's there.
58
00:02:16,116 --> 00:02:17,701
Let's get him in a basket.
Ready?
59
00:02:17,826 --> 00:02:19,786
One, two, lift!
60
00:02:55,155 --> 00:02:57,866
Forty-six-year-old guy
in a coma.
61
00:02:57,991 --> 00:02:59,785
Doesn't appear to be
anything wrong with him
62
00:02:59,910 --> 00:03:02,078
except for the fact
that he weighs over 600 pounds.
63
00:03:02,204 --> 00:03:03,371
What time
does he usually get in?
64
00:03:03,497 --> 00:03:05,290
Any time between
8:00 and 10:00.
65
00:03:05,415 --> 00:03:07,083
- Did you say 600?
- At least.
66
00:03:07,209 --> 00:03:09,002
Biggest scale we got
only goes up to 350
67
00:03:09,127 --> 00:03:11,421
but this guy's waistline
is over seven feet.
68
00:03:11,546 --> 00:03:14,466
Which means he's a diabetic
with blood thicker than pancake batter.
69
00:03:14,591 --> 00:03:16,301
No mystery there,
not much we can do.
70
00:03:16,426 --> 00:03:17,385
Blood sugar's normal.
71
00:03:17,511 --> 00:03:21,056
Cholesterol's lower than mine,
tox screen's clean, no sign of trauma.
72
00:03:21,181 --> 00:03:22,641
Sure there wasn't
a mix-up at the lab?
73
00:03:22,766 --> 00:03:24,226
Three times?
74
00:03:24,351 --> 00:03:26,561
It's almost 11:00,
where is House?
75
00:03:28,396 --> 00:03:29,940
(MAN SINGING)
76
00:04:06,685 --> 00:04:08,478
(SPEAKING FRENCH)
77
00:04:08,603 --> 00:04:10,438
(CONTINUES SINGING)
78
00:04:10,939 --> 00:04:11,982
Hello!
79
00:04:13,358 --> 00:04:15,277
It's 11:00.
80
00:04:15,402 --> 00:04:19,656
Which means my friend is ready for his
sponge bath and I shouldn't be here!
81
00:04:21,116 --> 00:04:25,620
Hey, Gomer Pyle!
I know you can hear me.
82
00:04:27,497 --> 00:04:29,082
(DOOR OPENING)
83
00:04:36,089 --> 00:04:38,008
I think you mean Barney Fife.
84
00:04:38,341 --> 00:04:41,052
So many great idiot icons
to choose from.
85
00:04:42,220 --> 00:04:44,514
You need time
to think of some more?
86
00:04:44,639 --> 00:04:46,683
Either arraign me
or let me go.
87
00:04:46,808 --> 00:04:49,144
No problem.
Which do you prefer?
88
00:04:59,905 --> 00:05:01,114
What took you so long?
89
00:05:01,239 --> 00:05:04,409
Sorry. I didn't have 15 grand
in my loose change jar.
90
00:05:04,534 --> 00:05:06,745
- What the hell did you do?
- Nothing.
91
00:05:06,912 --> 00:05:10,290
Your motorcycle was impounded,
that explains the speeding, DUI,
92
00:05:10,415 --> 00:05:11,708
and driving
without a license.
93
00:05:11,833 --> 00:05:15,295
The fact that you're you explains
the illegal possession of narcotics
94
00:05:15,420 --> 00:05:17,339
and resisting arrest.
95
00:05:19,382 --> 00:05:20,634
Where's your car?
96
00:05:20,759 --> 00:05:21,843
What happened?
97
00:05:21,968 --> 00:05:24,888
Some idiot cop with crotch rot
obviously thought
98
00:05:25,013 --> 00:05:27,641
that I didn't treat him with the
deference due to a man of his stature.
99
00:05:27,766 --> 00:05:29,267
He trumped up a traffic stop,
100
00:05:29,392 --> 00:05:30,936
next thing I know
I'm sharing a cage
101
00:05:31,061 --> 00:05:32,312
with a guy
who thinks that showers
102
00:05:32,437 --> 00:05:34,856
are the way the devil
gets inside you.
103
00:05:34,981 --> 00:05:36,107
Does Cuddy know?
104
00:05:36,232 --> 00:05:38,151
Everything she needs to.
105
00:05:39,194 --> 00:05:41,529
- I'm innocent.
- Till proven guilty.
106
00:05:41,655 --> 00:05:44,407
Guy wanted to punish me,
he did it. It's over.
107
00:05:44,532 --> 00:05:45,617
Gotta get yourself a lawyer.
108
00:05:45,742 --> 00:05:46,660
Already got one.
109
00:05:46,785 --> 00:05:49,496
You know what they say about the lawyer
who has himself as a client?
110
00:05:49,621 --> 00:05:51,873
Same thing they say
about the doctor who lends 15 grand
111
00:05:51,998 --> 00:05:54,417
to a friend he knows
can't pay him back.
112
00:05:54,542 --> 00:05:57,754
Relax, you'll get it.
Where am I gonna take off to?
113
00:06:02,968 --> 00:06:05,720
Does Salma Hayek
live in Mexico or Spain?
114
00:06:07,681 --> 00:06:10,684
There's nothing abnormal in the EEG
or the neurological exam.
115
00:06:10,809 --> 00:06:12,769
I'm guessing
it's food-related.
116
00:06:12,894 --> 00:06:14,354
Improperly prepared
puffer fish
117
00:06:14,479 --> 00:06:15,814
can have toxins
that could cause a coma
118
00:06:15,939 --> 00:06:18,525
and might not show up
on the tox screen.
119
00:06:19,025 --> 00:06:20,151
Where do you think he is?
120
00:06:20,276 --> 00:06:21,611
He's probably
at the track.
121
00:06:21,736 --> 00:06:23,780
If he's at the track he'd tell us
so we don't have to page him,
122
00:06:23,905 --> 00:06:26,449
and if it was a puffer fish, he'd
be dead in six to eight hours, tops.
123
00:06:26,574 --> 00:06:27,909
He's been in a coma
at least 24.
124
00:06:28,034 --> 00:06:31,079
And the guy didn't get to 600 pounds
eating a load of sushi.
125
00:06:31,204 --> 00:06:32,580
What if he was
in a motorcycle accident?
126
00:06:32,706 --> 00:06:35,250
Explains the coma.
But how'd he get back in bed?
127
00:06:35,375 --> 00:06:37,877
Oh, Cameron's talking
about House!
128
00:06:38,003 --> 00:06:39,212
You ever see how he drives?
129
00:06:39,337 --> 00:06:40,338
No, we haven't.
130
00:06:40,463 --> 00:06:42,298
But I have seen how many pills
he's been popping lately,
131
00:06:42,424 --> 00:06:45,010
I wouldn't be surprised
if he's in a coma somewhere himself.
132
00:06:45,135 --> 00:06:47,137
If I am, this is
one lame hallucination.
133
00:06:47,262 --> 00:06:48,263
What happened to you?
134
00:06:48,388 --> 00:06:51,558
If you ever end up in a bar with the Cambridge Women's
Heavyweight Eight,
135
00:06:51,683 --> 00:06:54,477
do not accept an offer
of an upside-down kamikaze shot.
136
00:06:54,602 --> 00:06:56,438
- We have a case.
- Fat guy in a coma, I know.
137
00:06:56,563 --> 00:06:57,480
- Cuddy found you?
- Nope.
138
00:06:57,605 --> 00:06:59,149
But the wall
between Wilson's office
139
00:06:59,274 --> 00:07:00,608
and this one
is thinner than you'd think.
140
00:07:00,734 --> 00:07:01,818
Which means
we need to stop talking
141
00:07:01,943 --> 00:07:03,570
about what a pathetic loser
he is.
142
00:07:03,695 --> 00:07:06,197
Start treating Jabba
for pickwickian syndrome.
143
00:07:06,322 --> 00:07:10,368
His 96 double-Zs are probably putting
pressure on his chest, suffocating him.
144
00:07:10,493 --> 00:07:12,162
CO2 and oxygen
sats are normal.
145
00:07:12,287 --> 00:07:14,748
For you and me.
What's normal for a hippopotamus?
146
00:07:14,873 --> 00:07:16,207
And get
a detailed medical history.
147
00:07:16,332 --> 00:07:17,417
From who?
He was brought in alone.
148
00:07:17,542 --> 00:07:21,004
And I doubt a guy who weighs 600 pounds
bothers with annual physicals.
149
00:07:21,129 --> 00:07:22,797
Talk to the neighbors
and search the house.
150
00:07:22,922 --> 00:07:26,134
Let's see what else
Shamu's been up to besides eating.
151
00:07:26,885 --> 00:07:27,969
This conversation is over
152
00:07:28,094 --> 00:07:32,057
because I've officially run out
of clever things to call the guy.
153
00:07:38,897 --> 00:07:42,525
It's hard to believe you can even attach
this much flesh to a human skeleton.
154
00:07:42,650 --> 00:07:45,737
CHASE: I wouldn't exactly
call this attached.
155
00:07:45,862 --> 00:07:46,780
This is ridiculous.
156
00:07:46,905 --> 00:07:49,324
A person shouldn't be able to
eat themselves into oblivion
157
00:07:49,449 --> 00:07:52,285
and then just expect everyone
to pull out the stops to fix everything.
158
00:07:52,410 --> 00:07:55,371
What are we supposed to do?
Refuse treatment to anyone who's obese?
159
00:07:55,497 --> 00:07:58,166
Come on, give me a break.
This guy's not obese.
160
00:07:58,291 --> 00:08:00,960
He's not even morbidly obese.
He's suicidal.
161
00:08:01,086 --> 00:08:02,629
People who attempt suicide
get treated.
162
00:08:02,754 --> 00:08:04,547
Plenty of noncompliant
diabetics don't.
163
00:08:04,672 --> 00:08:06,382
We don't give
drug addicts dialysis
164
00:08:06,508 --> 00:08:08,760
or alcoholics
liver transplants.
165
00:08:08,885 --> 00:08:10,220
What is your problem?
166
00:08:10,345 --> 00:08:11,930
You get beat up
by a gang of fat kids
167
00:08:12,055 --> 00:08:13,264
when you were in grade school
or something?
168
00:08:13,389 --> 00:08:16,351
Yeah. I'm the one
with the problem.
169
00:08:17,268 --> 00:08:19,270
So, I think
his bedroom's through there,
170
00:08:19,395 --> 00:08:21,606
and the kitchen's
to the left.
171
00:08:21,773 --> 00:08:23,608
Have you seen any changes
in his personality?
172
00:08:23,733 --> 00:08:25,944
Any trouble with memory
or balance?
173
00:08:26,069 --> 00:08:28,905
No, but I really
don't see him that often.
174
00:08:29,030 --> 00:08:30,615
He's not unfriendly
or anything,
175
00:08:30,740 --> 00:08:32,784
I guess he just likes
to keep to himself.
176
00:08:32,909 --> 00:08:36,746
I think he only gave me a spare set
of keys 'cause I gave him mine.
177
00:08:38,248 --> 00:08:39,207
What?
178
00:08:39,332 --> 00:08:43,253
Nothing. Just reminds me
of someone I know. Who is unfriendly.
179
00:08:43,378 --> 00:08:44,963
Does George have a job?
180
00:08:45,088 --> 00:08:47,215
He has a headhunting business
he runs from home.
181
00:08:47,340 --> 00:08:49,259
Occasionally
he'll interview people here,
182
00:08:49,384 --> 00:08:51,344
but he does most of it
over the phone.
183
00:08:51,469 --> 00:08:52,637
WOW!
184
00:08:52,762 --> 00:08:55,557
Yeah, he loves to cook.
185
00:08:55,765 --> 00:08:57,851
And eat, obviously.
186
00:08:57,976 --> 00:09:00,395
Four-course gourmet meals
almost every night,
187
00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:01,604
sometimes for lunch, too.
188
00:09:01,729 --> 00:09:04,732
Do you know if he ever uses
any unpasteurized cheese or wild game?
189
00:09:04,858 --> 00:09:05,942
I'm not sure.
190
00:09:06,067 --> 00:09:08,862
He gets all his groceries delivered
from that market down on Alden.
191
00:09:08,987 --> 00:09:10,572
They'd probably know.
192
00:09:12,365 --> 00:09:14,492
- He have any friends?
- No.
193
00:09:14,617 --> 00:09:17,120
I mean, sometimes women
do come by.
194
00:09:17,662 --> 00:09:21,332
Young, attractive, never the same one
twice, if you know what I mean.
195
00:09:21,457 --> 00:09:22,292
I see.
196
00:09:22,417 --> 00:09:26,171
There can't be many women
who'd wanna be with a guy like him.
197
00:09:29,591 --> 00:09:32,468
(WOMAN CHATTERING ON PA)
198
00:09:32,594 --> 00:09:34,554
It's usually worst
in the morning.
199
00:09:34,679 --> 00:09:36,139
Especially
if I've slept on my arm.
200
00:09:36,264 --> 00:09:39,142
If I sleep on my back
or with my arms out, I'm usually okay.
201
00:09:40,351 --> 00:09:44,272
So your arm only hurts
after you lie on top of it all night.
202
00:09:44,397 --> 00:09:45,356
Yeah.
203
00:09:46,524 --> 00:09:50,153
Well, have you thought about,
I don't know, not doing that?
204
00:09:50,278 --> 00:09:53,114
Yeah. But it's how I sleep,
it's how I've always slept.
205
00:09:53,239 --> 00:09:54,324
Well, there's always surgery.
206
00:09:54,449 --> 00:09:56,367
To do what? Like, clean out
some cartilage or something?
207
00:09:56,492 --> 00:10:00,371
You're not sleeping on some cartilage,
you're sleeping on your arm.
208
00:10:00,496 --> 00:10:02,415
You wanna remove my arm?
209
00:10:02,540 --> 00:10:05,376
Well, it is your left.
You know, a guy's gotta sleep.
210
00:10:06,169 --> 00:10:07,712
Are you insane?
211
00:10:15,345 --> 00:10:17,597
(HOUSE WHISTLING)
212
00:10:17,722 --> 00:10:20,058
I see spending a night in jail
hasn't humbled you a bit.
213
00:10:20,183 --> 00:10:22,393
While following
my every move is flattering,
214
00:10:22,518 --> 00:10:26,147
a single rose on my doorstep
each morning would be more enticing.
215
00:10:26,272 --> 00:10:27,941
Just bringing your boss
up to speed,
216
00:10:28,066 --> 00:10:30,735
which I guess
you didn't feel was necessary.
217
00:10:30,860 --> 00:10:32,737
You gonna add that
to my list of charges?
218
00:10:32,862 --> 00:10:36,115
People who are innocent
tend not to try to hide their arrest.
219
00:10:36,241 --> 00:10:40,370
Is that based on your years of
experience arresting innocent people?
220
00:10:42,330 --> 00:10:44,040
The way
you're going at that gum,
221
00:10:44,165 --> 00:10:46,501
it's obviously not having
the desired effect.
222
00:10:46,626 --> 00:10:49,837
You're the addict. You're gonna be back
on the butts in a month.
223
00:10:49,963 --> 00:10:53,466
You're just taking out your frustration
on me 'cause my meds actually work.
224
00:10:54,175 --> 00:10:56,094
Why don't you quit
while you're ahead.
225
00:10:56,219 --> 00:10:57,804
Before you end up
as a security guard
226
00:10:57,929 --> 00:11:00,265
working the night shift
at some strip mall.
227
00:11:01,474 --> 00:11:03,268
I think working around
a bunch of nurses
228
00:11:03,393 --> 00:11:06,604
has given you a false sense
of your ability to intimidate.
229
00:11:15,446 --> 00:11:16,781
Who was that?
230
00:11:17,991 --> 00:11:20,827
Apparently Cuddy's widened
her sperm donor search
231
00:11:20,952 --> 00:11:22,578
to include Neanderthals.
232
00:11:22,704 --> 00:11:25,123
Cuddy's looking for
a sperm donor?
233
00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:29,460
It was a joke.
Like Cuddy would ever want a kid.
234
00:11:29,585 --> 00:11:30,670
Or a kid
would ever want Cuddy.
235
00:11:30,795 --> 00:11:33,006
Hello, that's why it's funny!
236
00:11:33,506 --> 00:11:34,882
Why are you guys here?
237
00:11:35,008 --> 00:11:36,426
It's not pickwick's.
238
00:11:36,551 --> 00:11:38,469
Intubation and steroids
have had no effect.
239
00:11:38,594 --> 00:11:40,346
Except maybe to cause
whatever it is to get worse.
240
00:11:40,471 --> 00:11:41,431
He's got a fever now.
241
00:11:41,556 --> 00:11:42,640
What'd you find out?
242
00:11:42,765 --> 00:11:45,435
That you and George have the same taste
in home furnishings and women.
243
00:11:45,560 --> 00:11:47,312
Danish Modern
and Russian gymnasts?
244
00:11:47,437 --> 00:11:48,604
Pianos and prostitutes.
245
00:11:48,730 --> 00:11:50,481
We should do an LP
and look for neurosyphilis.
246
00:11:50,606 --> 00:11:52,442
- It's not syphilis.
- How do you know?
247
00:11:52,567 --> 00:11:54,652
Because you get STDs
from people you trust,
248
00:11:54,777 --> 00:11:56,863
people you don't feel
the need to protect yourself from.
249
00:11:56,988 --> 00:11:59,574
Whatever he has is connected to his gut,
not what's below it.
250
00:11:59,699 --> 00:12:01,326
MRI his brain,
look for clots.
251
00:12:01,451 --> 00:12:04,370
Weight limit
on the MRI machine is 450 pounds.
252
00:12:04,495 --> 00:12:05,747
So do a CT.
253
00:12:05,872 --> 00:12:07,457
Limit's 350.
254
00:12:07,582 --> 00:12:08,958
Then just start treatment.
255
00:12:09,083 --> 00:12:10,877
If we give him blood thinners
and the coma's caused
256
00:12:11,002 --> 00:12:12,545
by a bleed instead of a clot,
we could kill him.
257
00:12:12,670 --> 00:12:15,965
Either start treatment
or start building a stronger MRI.
258
00:12:16,090 --> 00:12:17,383
Whatever you do, do it fast.
259
00:12:17,508 --> 00:12:18,634
The longer
he stays in the coma,
260
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:21,637
the less likely it is
he'll ever wake up.
261
00:12:24,182 --> 00:12:25,892
There's no way.
262
00:12:26,017 --> 00:12:28,811
His head's the only part
that we have to get in the machine.
263
00:12:28,936 --> 00:12:30,313
If we can just
get him on the table...
264
00:12:30,438 --> 00:12:32,231
We get him on the table,
we break the table.
265
00:12:32,357 --> 00:12:34,650
We break the table,
hospital's out a million dollars
266
00:12:34,776 --> 00:12:35,610
and we're out of our jobs.
267
00:12:35,735 --> 00:12:37,987
The weight limit's
obviously just an estimation.
268
00:12:38,112 --> 00:12:40,198
It's not like if it can hold
450 pounds fine,
269
00:12:40,323 --> 00:12:42,283
it'll instantly collapse
under 451.
270
00:12:42,408 --> 00:12:46,162
He's not one pound over,
he's 150 pounds over.
271
00:12:46,287 --> 00:12:49,499
I don't care! He still deserves the
same standard of care as anyone else.
272
00:12:49,624 --> 00:12:52,877
Then you believe the machine
will stand on principle.
273
00:12:57,632 --> 00:12:59,759
You guys gonna help or not?
274
00:13:01,844 --> 00:13:03,346
How much
does this guy weigh?
275
00:13:03,471 --> 00:13:05,473
- 440.
- Looks like a lot more than that.
276
00:13:05,598 --> 00:13:06,766
It's 'cause he's lying down.
277
00:13:06,891 --> 00:13:09,227
You guys ready?
One, two, three.
278
00:13:09,352 --> 00:13:11,062
(ALL GRUNTING)
279
00:13:14,023 --> 00:13:15,983
(TABLE CREAKING)
280
00:13:25,993 --> 00:13:28,371
- Here.
- What's this?
281
00:13:29,288 --> 00:13:31,207
I made some calls for you.
282
00:13:31,332 --> 00:13:33,209
The guy's the best criminal attorney
in Princeton.
283
00:13:33,334 --> 00:13:34,460
Thanks, but I don't need it.
284
00:13:34,585 --> 00:13:36,337
I assume
you told Inspector Clouseau
285
00:13:36,462 --> 00:13:38,256
that I have a valid prescription
for the Wcodin.
286
00:13:38,381 --> 00:13:40,967
Yeah, and I assume you did as well.
Did it make a difference?
287
00:13:41,092 --> 00:13:42,218
The guy's pissed!
288
00:13:42,343 --> 00:13:45,263
And with the DEA now treating
pain doctors like Colombian...
289
00:13:45,388 --> 00:13:47,974
I'm not a pain doctor,
I'm a pain patient.
290
00:13:49,100 --> 00:13:51,310
Tell it to your lawyer.
291
00:14:04,824 --> 00:14:08,286
No midline shifts,
no bleeds, clots, infarcts.
292
00:14:08,411 --> 00:14:09,912
I don't see
any edema, either.
293
00:14:10,037 --> 00:14:11,622
So what do we do now?
294
00:14:11,747 --> 00:14:12,707
An LP.
295
00:14:12,832 --> 00:14:15,626
Even if it's not an STD, a fever points
toward some sort of infection.
296
00:14:15,751 --> 00:14:19,547
I'm not sure we can do an LP
on a guy his size.
297
00:14:22,383 --> 00:14:23,259
What?
298
00:14:23,384 --> 00:14:25,595
You have to be able to palpate the spine
to know where to go.
299
00:14:25,720 --> 00:14:27,263
We could use fluoroscopy
to guide us.
300
00:14:27,388 --> 00:14:29,599
He still wouldn't be able
to bring his knees up and bend forward
301
00:14:29,724 --> 00:14:31,017
in order to open the space
between...
302
00:14:31,142 --> 00:14:32,518
(GRUNTING)
303
00:14:33,394 --> 00:14:34,645
(SCREAMING)
304
00:14:35,104 --> 00:14:36,731
George, it's all right,
you're in a hospital!
305
00:14:36,856 --> 00:14:38,691
Calm down, man, calm down!
306
00:14:38,816 --> 00:14:40,485
- Get him out already!
- I'm trying!
307
00:14:40,610 --> 00:14:41,652
Come on!
308
00:14:41,777 --> 00:14:43,029
(GEORGE SCREAMING)
309
00:14:45,031 --> 00:14:46,574
We're gonna get you out!
310
00:14:55,333 --> 00:14:57,502
CAMERON: We still have no idea
why he was in the coma to begin with.
311
00:14:57,627 --> 00:14:59,420
Or why he woke up.
312
00:14:59,754 --> 00:15:01,881
CHASE: It was probably
just some sort of head trauma
313
00:15:02,006 --> 00:15:02,882
and we missed the swelling
314
00:15:03,007 --> 00:15:05,760
because, well,
his head's already swollen.
315
00:15:05,885 --> 00:15:08,012
Bump on the noggin
doesn't explain the fever.
316
00:15:08,137 --> 00:15:10,973
An infection made worse by the steroids
we gave him for pickwick's does.
317
00:15:11,098 --> 00:15:13,059
He's not worse,
he's better.
318
00:15:13,184 --> 00:15:16,062
We just replaced
the last MRI you broke.
319
00:15:16,187 --> 00:15:19,106
Referring to the fund-raising funbags
by the royal "we" now?
320
00:15:19,232 --> 00:15:20,900
Let me explain
cause and effect to you.
321
00:15:21,025 --> 00:15:24,111
I specifically told them
to skip the boring testing part
322
00:15:24,237 --> 00:15:25,530
and jump right to
the dangerous treatment.
323
00:15:25,655 --> 00:15:28,449
You blow stuff up,
makes my life miserable,
324
00:15:28,574 --> 00:15:31,160
makes me need to make
your life miserable.
325
00:15:31,285 --> 00:15:32,870
He's telling the truth.
326
00:15:38,084 --> 00:15:40,753
Kids these days, got no respect
for other people's property.
327
00:15:40,878 --> 00:15:42,630
Repairmen cost less
than lawyers.
328
00:15:43,923 --> 00:15:46,551
Morbid obesity
is a legally defined disability,
329
00:15:46,676 --> 00:15:48,678
which means
if we'd denied access to the MRI,
330
00:15:48,803 --> 00:15:52,181
he could have sued us for discrimination
as well as malpractice.
331
00:15:52,306 --> 00:15:53,849
This was your idea?
332
00:15:53,975 --> 00:15:54,934
Yeah.
333
00:16:05,278 --> 00:16:08,739
Looks like Cameron's gonna be having
a lot more ideas in future.
334
00:16:08,864 --> 00:16:11,659
Who knew that being bloated and bitchy
could actually come in handy?
335
00:16:11,784 --> 00:16:13,369
- Shut up.
- What if it is hormones?
336
00:16:13,494 --> 00:16:14,620
It's not hormones.
337
00:16:14,745 --> 00:16:15,997
I'm talking about George.
338
00:16:16,122 --> 00:16:19,000
Acute adrenal insufficiency
could cause a temporary coma.
339
00:16:19,125 --> 00:16:21,836
A glandular problem would cause
his temperature to be low, not high.
340
00:16:21,961 --> 00:16:23,087
Maybe the fever's
not related.
341
00:16:23,212 --> 00:16:24,797
If it's not related,
there's nothing to talk about.
342
00:16:24,922 --> 00:16:26,841
We should do
an ACTH stimulation test
343
00:16:26,966 --> 00:16:28,884
and check his skin
for acanthosis nigricans.
344
00:16:29,010 --> 00:16:32,013
Or the fever is related
and so are the prostitutes.
345
00:16:32,138 --> 00:16:34,890
We should do a full STD panel
and check his genitals for chancres.
346
00:16:35,016 --> 00:16:36,183
CHASE: We should do nothing.
347
00:16:36,309 --> 00:16:38,519
Just keep him a couple of days
for observation.
348
00:16:38,644 --> 00:16:39,645
If he doesn't get any worse,
349
00:16:39,770 --> 00:16:43,399
it was probably just a hematoma
that dissipated on its own.
350
00:16:43,899 --> 00:16:46,027
Or we do all of the above.
351
00:16:46,694 --> 00:16:48,362
You check his belly
for patches.
352
00:16:48,487 --> 00:16:50,156
You check underneath
for sores.
353
00:16:50,281 --> 00:16:53,576
And you just sit on your ass.
354
00:16:59,373 --> 00:17:03,419
Acanthosis nigricans
is a hyperpigmentation of the skin,
355
00:17:03,544 --> 00:17:06,213
usually indicates some sort
of hormonal imbalance.
356
00:17:06,339 --> 00:17:08,257
There's nothing wrong
with my hormones.
357
00:17:08,382 --> 00:17:11,260
It's the first thing every doctor
I've ever gone to has checked.
358
00:17:11,385 --> 00:17:14,096
Then it's the blood pressure,
then it's gotta be diabetes.
359
00:17:14,221 --> 00:17:17,642
They all figure there's gotta be
something wrong with me.
360
00:17:17,767 --> 00:17:19,769
You having any problems
with your vision?
361
00:17:19,894 --> 00:17:22,772
No, I have nystagmus.
I've had it since birth, I'm fine.
362
00:17:22,897 --> 00:17:24,940
You're not fine.
You were in a coma for two days.
363
00:17:25,066 --> 00:17:26,150
There's something wrong
with you.
364
00:17:26,275 --> 00:17:30,279
Was something wrong with me,
now I'm better, now I'd like to go home.
365
00:17:30,988 --> 00:17:32,823
A coma's not like
a stomach ache.
366
00:17:32,948 --> 00:17:35,117
You can't just shrug it off
and hope it's not anything serious.
367
00:17:35,242 --> 00:17:37,620
My company places
a lot of insurance executives.
368
00:17:37,745 --> 00:17:42,958
There are over 300,000 deaths
caused each year by medical mistakes
369
00:17:43,084 --> 00:17:46,962
and hospital-associated infections.
I'll come in for tests.
370
00:17:47,088 --> 00:17:50,633
There are over 400,000 deaths
caused by obesity-related illnesses.
371
00:17:50,758 --> 00:17:54,303
The CDC says those figures
are a gross overestimation.
372
00:17:54,428 --> 00:17:57,682
George, you ever notice
you don't see a lot of obese old men?
373
00:17:57,807 --> 00:17:59,934
If I'm gonna
have a heart attack,
374
00:18:00,059 --> 00:18:05,648
I would rather it be caused
by a perfect pan-roasted ris de veau
375
00:18:06,273 --> 00:18:10,736
than running 26 miles for no reason
other than to brag that I can do it.
376
00:18:10,861 --> 00:18:15,116
Or to have an MRI machine
break in the middle of a procedure!
377
00:18:15,241 --> 00:18:16,575
We're sorry about that.
378
00:18:16,701 --> 00:18:18,828
It was the only way to rule out
a stroke or brain hemorrhage.
379
00:18:18,953 --> 00:18:22,206
And now that you have,
when can I go?
380
00:18:26,335 --> 00:18:28,671
(WOMAN CHATTERING
ON PA SYSTEM)
381
00:18:31,132 --> 00:18:32,842
It's probably her mom.
382
00:18:32,967 --> 00:18:36,137
I bet she's huge.
She's from the Midwest.
383
00:18:37,555 --> 00:18:38,889
Since when do you eat beets?
384
00:18:39,014 --> 00:18:40,057
Since I was five.
385
00:18:40,182 --> 00:18:42,393
And who are we talking about?
You know, just in case you need me
386
00:18:42,518 --> 00:18:44,562
to chime in and tell you
you're a lunatic at some point?
387
00:18:44,687 --> 00:18:48,149
Cameron. She's lying,
destroying hospital equipment,
388
00:18:48,274 --> 00:18:49,567
telling Cuddy off.
389
00:18:49,692 --> 00:18:51,986
I gotta find out
where she got the Fat Scratch Fever.
390
00:18:52,111 --> 00:18:54,321
Yeah, you definitely better
get to the bottom of that.
391
00:18:54,447 --> 00:18:56,031
I heard Cuddy gave you
the name of a lawyer.
392
00:18:56,157 --> 00:19:00,035
Or it could just be pity. She feels
guilty about being born beautiful.
393
00:19:00,161 --> 00:19:02,788
So she overcompensates
by being nice to ugly people.
394
00:19:02,913 --> 00:19:04,790
Would explain why
she gets along so well with you.
395
00:19:04,915 --> 00:19:07,501
From what I hear,
the patient reminds her of you, not me.
396
00:19:07,626 --> 00:19:08,461
Call the lawyer.
397
00:19:08,586 --> 00:19:10,796
Cameron sees a clump of dirt
and she thinks of me.
398
00:19:10,921 --> 00:19:14,884
Or a lump of something else.
You're a lunatic. Call the lawyer.
399
00:19:18,304 --> 00:19:20,097
- Very mature.
- You started it.
400
00:19:20,222 --> 00:19:23,142
Skin exam and ACTH stimulation test
were both normal.
401
00:19:23,267 --> 00:19:25,311
He has nystagmus
but it's congenital.
402
00:19:25,436 --> 00:19:26,771
No way it's related
to the coma.
403
00:19:26,896 --> 00:19:30,065
You say, "No way,"
I say... Yeah, no way.
404
00:19:30,191 --> 00:19:32,526
Blood and urine were negative
for chlamydia, herpes, and syphilis.
405
00:19:32,651 --> 00:19:34,403
Looks like
we got ourselves a mystery.
406
00:19:34,528 --> 00:19:36,947
Not for long.
He wants to be discharged.
407
00:19:37,072 --> 00:19:39,325
Oh, sure.
Places to go, people to eat.
408
00:19:39,450 --> 00:19:40,534
He insists
his chance of dying
409
00:19:40,659 --> 00:19:41,786
from a hospital-acquired
infection
410
00:19:41,911 --> 00:19:44,038
is greater than him dying
from whatever caused his coma.
411
00:19:44,163 --> 00:19:48,209
Did you tell him that statistics
also say that he's a big, fat idiot?
412
00:19:48,334 --> 00:19:50,211
- Yeah, I did.
- He's not backing down.
413
00:19:50,336 --> 00:19:52,171
He says if we don't discharge him,
he'll leave AMA.
414
00:19:52,296 --> 00:19:55,758
Selectively rational,
stubborn, uncooperative,
415
00:19:55,883 --> 00:19:57,676
maybe you ought to
check his leg.
416
00:19:57,802 --> 00:19:59,345
(FORCED LAUGHTER)
417
00:19:59,470 --> 00:20:02,932
Do you see what he did there?
The patient's like me.
418
00:20:03,057 --> 00:20:04,850
The patient's three mes.
419
00:20:05,309 --> 00:20:06,852
If I were him...
420
00:20:10,356 --> 00:20:13,025
Maybe it's not
such a mystery after all.
421
00:20:19,323 --> 00:20:20,950
(EXHALES)
422
00:20:22,326 --> 00:20:24,036
Enjoying your Salisbury steak?
423
00:20:24,161 --> 00:20:25,996
Putting chopped parsley
in a hamburger
424
00:20:26,121 --> 00:20:28,207
does not
a Salisbury steak make.
425
00:20:28,666 --> 00:20:31,418
You must be Dr. House.
426
00:20:31,877 --> 00:20:36,340
And you must be
full of baloney. A lot of it.
427
00:20:36,465 --> 00:20:39,802
Right. Fat joke. Always fun.
428
00:20:39,927 --> 00:20:41,929
The only people
you can still make fun of.
429
00:20:42,054 --> 00:20:44,682
And Christians.
Oh, and black people.
430
00:20:45,432 --> 00:20:48,018
No one in their right mind
comes out of a coma
431
00:20:48,143 --> 00:20:50,396
and immediately asks to go home
with an unknown condition,
432
00:20:50,521 --> 00:20:52,273
which means that either
you're not in your right mind
433
00:20:52,398 --> 00:20:53,816
or it's not
an unknown condition.
434
00:20:53,941 --> 00:20:56,068
So, what is it?
You tried to off yourself?
435
00:20:56,193 --> 00:21:00,239
You figure I'm fat,
therefore I hate myself.
436
00:21:00,364 --> 00:21:02,867
Yeah, that's a huge leap
of logic.
437
00:21:02,992 --> 00:21:06,245
I don't wanna die.
I just don't wanna be here.
438
00:21:06,370 --> 00:21:08,622
Then it's a condition
you've already had diagnosed,
439
00:21:08,747 --> 00:21:10,291
or it's something
you know you've inherited.
440
00:21:10,416 --> 00:21:12,793
Let's see, your stomach
has deep-seated feelings
441
00:21:12,918 --> 00:21:14,253
of abandonment
written all over it,
442
00:21:14,378 --> 00:21:16,380
which points toward
sexual abuse.
443
00:21:16,505 --> 00:21:20,467
While a fear of hospitals, that points
to a more specific traumatic event.
444
00:21:20,593 --> 00:21:25,055
So I'm gonna say, your mom
in the hospital with a candlestick.
445
00:21:25,180 --> 00:21:28,434
And by candlestick, of course,
I mean inherited OTC deficiency.
446
00:21:28,559 --> 00:21:31,854
My parents are both alive and well
and living in Boca Raton.
447
00:21:31,979 --> 00:21:33,939
Thyrotoxic periodic paralysis?
448
00:21:34,064 --> 00:21:35,441
I have no idea what that is.
449
00:21:35,566 --> 00:21:37,860
- Leukoencephalopathy.
- Will you stop!
450
00:21:39,403 --> 00:21:41,947
If I knew what was wrong,
I would tell you.
451
00:21:42,072 --> 00:21:44,950
I'm not an imbecile,
and I'm not miserable.
452
00:21:46,869 --> 00:21:48,621
I'm just overweight.
453
00:21:49,788 --> 00:21:51,498
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
454
00:21:54,084 --> 00:21:54,919
What?
455
00:21:55,461 --> 00:21:56,462
When?
456
00:21:58,881 --> 00:22:00,466
To be continued.
457
00:22:03,010 --> 00:22:04,136
(EXCLAIMS)
458
00:22:25,407 --> 00:22:26,659
What are you doing here?
459
00:22:26,784 --> 00:22:28,994
Executing a search
of the premises.
460
00:22:29,119 --> 00:22:31,956
When you...
When you got bailed out
461
00:22:32,081 --> 00:22:34,959
before we could get a judge
to approve this,
462
00:22:36,210 --> 00:22:38,963
I almost didn't bother.
463
00:22:39,088 --> 00:22:43,050
I thought for sure you'd come
straight home and throw everything out.
464
00:22:43,175 --> 00:22:47,429
Rookie mistake. Never underestimate
the stupidity of an addict.
465
00:22:48,722 --> 00:22:53,060
There's gotta be
over 600 Wcodin in here.
466
00:22:53,185 --> 00:22:55,980
Which most DAs would say
proves intent to traffic.
467
00:22:56,105 --> 00:23:00,234
Even if all you really intended was
to simply be wasted 2417
468
00:23:00,359 --> 00:23:01,485
while practicing medicine.
469
00:23:01,610 --> 00:23:04,446
In case you hadn't noticed,
those are prescription bottles.
470
00:23:04,571 --> 00:23:07,157
I'm not an expert
on linguistics per se,
471
00:23:07,282 --> 00:23:10,285
but I think that means
they were prescribed.
472
00:23:10,744 --> 00:23:12,329
(PILLS RATTLING)
473
00:23:13,122 --> 00:23:14,540
All these
were legally prescribed
474
00:23:14,665 --> 00:23:16,709
to a man
who's in constant pain
475
00:23:16,834 --> 00:23:17,960
but never misses
a day of work?
476
00:23:18,085 --> 00:23:20,671
Has it ever occurred to you
that's why I don't miss a day?
477
00:23:20,796 --> 00:23:24,258
Yeah. Yeah, crossed my mind.
Among other things.
478
00:23:24,383 --> 00:23:28,512
Like what an unprofessional,
unethical, arrogant ass you are.
479
00:23:30,472 --> 00:23:32,975
Because if you're unprofessional
in one area,
480
00:23:33,100 --> 00:23:34,810
it only makes sense.
481
00:23:36,103 --> 00:23:40,899
Now maybe just a few of these
are in someone else's name.
482
00:23:42,276 --> 00:23:44,236
Forged prescription,
483
00:23:44,361 --> 00:23:48,032
or just, um, swiped from the pharmacy
when nobody's looking.
484
00:23:50,701 --> 00:23:55,247
No, but, well,
you wouldn't do that. Right?
485
00:24:04,798 --> 00:24:05,841
Send him home.
486
00:24:05,966 --> 00:24:07,593
Why? You think he's healthy?
487
00:24:07,718 --> 00:24:09,136
Either I'm right,
488
00:24:09,261 --> 00:24:11,972
he knows what's wrong,
he's just too stubborn to admit it,
489
00:24:12,097 --> 00:24:14,058
or I was right
and it's pickwick's.
490
00:24:14,183 --> 00:24:16,018
The treatment
just had a delayed effect.
491
00:24:16,143 --> 00:24:18,020
You don't have
delayed effects to oxygen.
492
00:24:18,145 --> 00:24:19,646
And Pickwick's
doesn't explain the fever.
493
00:24:19,772 --> 00:24:21,857
Being engulfed
in an electric blanket of blubber
494
00:24:21,982 --> 00:24:23,108
could explain the fever.
495
00:24:23,233 --> 00:24:25,527
Yesterday you insisted
we keep him here because of the fever.
496
00:24:25,652 --> 00:24:27,112
We have no idea
what's wrong with the guy.
497
00:24:27,237 --> 00:24:29,531
For all we know
he could be dead in 12 hours.
498
00:24:29,656 --> 00:24:31,366
He does not want our help.
499
00:24:32,034 --> 00:24:33,577
Which means
he doesn't want your help.
500
00:24:33,702 --> 00:24:36,580
He's obviously just rationalizing.
And so are you!
501
00:24:36,705 --> 00:24:38,040
You would never give up
this easy
502
00:24:38,165 --> 00:24:41,752
if you weren't so busy dealing with
your own personal problems.
503
00:24:41,877 --> 00:24:43,879
Send him home.
504
00:24:44,004 --> 00:24:46,006
What did you tell that cop?
505
00:24:46,131 --> 00:24:48,425
- Nothing.
- Nothing as in nothing?
506
00:24:48,550 --> 00:24:50,094
Or as in nothing
that could cause him to think
507
00:24:50,219 --> 00:24:51,720
I have a stash
in my apartment?
508
00:24:51,845 --> 00:24:54,765
He called to see if I prescribed
the pills, I said yes. That's all.
509
00:24:54,890 --> 00:24:56,725
- Obviously not.
- What happened?
510
00:24:56,850 --> 00:25:00,020
He searched my house,
found a buttload of pills.
511
00:25:01,146 --> 00:25:02,564
Guy's gotta be prepared
for a rainy day.
512
00:25:02,689 --> 00:25:05,067
Last I checked pharmacies
were still open when it rained.
513
00:25:05,192 --> 00:25:07,694
And because I never know when
you're gonna be in one of your moods
514
00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:09,905
- and cut me off.
- Oh, it's my fault.
515
00:25:10,030 --> 00:25:11,490
I'm not the one
who talked to the cop.
516
00:25:11,615 --> 00:25:14,576
Well, I'm not the one
who put a thermometer in his rectum.
517
00:25:14,701 --> 00:25:18,163
So stop yelling at me
and start talking to your lawyer.
518
00:25:21,959 --> 00:25:23,627
Is there someone
who can check on you?
519
00:25:23,752 --> 00:25:24,711
Oh, don't worry.
520
00:25:24,837 --> 00:25:27,965
There's gonna be a whole crew
of carpenters in my bedroom
521
00:25:28,090 --> 00:25:29,967
for the next week at least.
522
00:25:30,551 --> 00:25:34,763
You know, there's an Overeaters
Anonymous meeting here at the hospital.
523
00:25:34,888 --> 00:25:38,016
If I wanted to jump out of airplanes
or climb Mount Everest,
524
00:25:38,142 --> 00:25:40,769
would you be telling me
to go to Daredevils Anonymous?
525
00:25:40,894 --> 00:25:43,021
I would be worried about you
just like I am now.
526
00:25:43,147 --> 00:25:44,273
Don't be.
527
00:25:44,398 --> 00:25:45,983
I enjoy food.
528
00:25:46,483 --> 00:25:50,112
I like cooking it, I like looking at it,
I like smelling it,
529
00:25:50,237 --> 00:25:52,614
and I especially
like eating it.
530
00:25:53,448 --> 00:25:57,077
Listen, whatever happens
is gonna happen.
531
00:25:58,036 --> 00:26:01,456
Ultimately it's all
out of our control anyway.
532
00:26:01,582 --> 00:26:02,833
Why doesn't
that philosophy apply
533
00:26:02,958 --> 00:26:06,670
to medical mistakes and
hospital-acquired infections as well?
534
00:26:08,505 --> 00:26:10,966
I'm a complicated man,
Dr. Cameron.
535
00:26:12,009 --> 00:26:15,095
But don't worry, I plan on staying
that way for a long time.
536
00:26:15,220 --> 00:26:16,763
Wait, wait, let us take you
all the way outside.
537
00:26:16,889 --> 00:26:18,098
I'm fine.
538
00:26:18,223 --> 00:26:20,517
It doesn't matter,
it's hospital rules.
539
00:26:20,642 --> 00:26:23,770
Oh, screw the rules.
I've been on my back for four days.
540
00:26:23,896 --> 00:26:25,314
I need the exercise, right?
541
00:26:25,439 --> 00:26:27,191
George, come on,
let us just take you to the taxi.
542
00:26:27,316 --> 00:26:31,612
Don't worry, I may not be able
to climb Everest, but I can walk, okay?
543
00:26:31,737 --> 00:26:34,031
- George...
- Now enough already.
544
00:26:41,288 --> 00:26:43,248
George, are you all right?
545
00:26:48,170 --> 00:26:50,881
George? You all right? George?
546
00:26:59,306 --> 00:27:01,308
FOREMAN: Disorientation
and loss of balance
547
00:27:01,433 --> 00:27:03,727
could mean
a neurofibromatosis.
548
00:27:03,852 --> 00:27:05,145
- Where's Chase?
- Don't know.
549
00:27:05,270 --> 00:27:07,773
Haven't seen him since you told him
to sit on his ass yesterday.
550
00:27:07,898 --> 00:27:09,358
Interesting.
551
00:27:09,483 --> 00:27:11,902
NF2 is also inherited,
which means I was right.
552
00:27:12,027 --> 00:27:12,986
You kept saying
it was pickwick's.
553
00:27:13,111 --> 00:27:14,905
Between the first pickwick's
and the second pickwick's,
554
00:27:15,030 --> 00:27:15,864
I said it was inherited.
555
00:27:15,989 --> 00:27:18,033
Whatever.
NF2 doesn't explain fever.
556
00:27:18,158 --> 00:27:19,910
I think we should focus
on the coma and the fever.
557
00:27:20,035 --> 00:27:22,246
Why? The disorientation
and loss of balance are more recent.
558
00:27:22,371 --> 00:27:23,622
The coma was
the most severe symptom.
559
00:27:23,747 --> 00:27:27,000
But he's not in the coma anymore
and he is disoriented.
560
00:27:27,125 --> 00:27:28,877
No, he's not.
561
00:27:29,002 --> 00:27:32,422
We have a rather large piece
of tempered glass that begs to differ.
562
00:27:32,547 --> 00:27:35,133
I just mean
it's not connected.
563
00:27:35,259 --> 00:27:36,593
You don't know that.
564
00:27:36,718 --> 00:27:37,552
Yeah, I do.
565
00:27:37,678 --> 00:27:38,845
How could
you possibly know...
566
00:27:38,971 --> 00:27:40,973
Because I did it!
567
00:27:44,476 --> 00:27:47,062
I didn't think
he should be discharged,
568
00:27:47,187 --> 00:27:49,940
so I gave him
three grams of phenytoin.
569
00:27:50,232 --> 00:27:51,733
I wasn't gonna just
let him leave.
570
00:27:51,858 --> 00:27:54,486
But you were okay with him
crashing through a glass wall?
571
00:27:54,611 --> 00:27:57,364
I tried to keep him in the wheelchair,
but he's tough to stop.
572
00:27:57,489 --> 00:27:59,408
Nice audible, Peyton.
573
00:28:00,575 --> 00:28:02,160
So, what do we do now?
574
00:28:02,286 --> 00:28:05,163
Discharge report says
he didn't eat his breakfast.
575
00:28:05,289 --> 00:28:08,041
Humpty Dumpty didn't get to be the size
of all the king's horses
576
00:28:08,166 --> 00:28:10,043
by skipping
the most important meal of the day.
577
00:28:10,168 --> 00:28:12,879
What causes coma, fever,
and loss of appetite?
578
00:28:13,005 --> 00:28:15,299
It can't be Chagas',
he's never been outside the country.
579
00:28:15,424 --> 00:28:16,300
But his stomach has.
580
00:28:16,425 --> 00:28:18,844
The food we eat no longer
comes from America's heartland.
581
00:28:18,969 --> 00:28:21,596
It comes from South America's
deforested jungle land
582
00:28:21,722 --> 00:28:24,266
where lettuce now grows
and lettuce pickers now poop.
583
00:28:24,391 --> 00:28:25,600
Get a sample of his CSF
584
00:28:25,726 --> 00:28:28,854
before the bugs that are now feasting
on his brain move on to dessert.
585
00:28:28,979 --> 00:28:32,149
How are we gonna do that?
He's too big to do an LP.
586
00:28:32,983 --> 00:28:35,068
So go straight to the source.
587
00:28:36,862 --> 00:28:39,698
You wanna drill a hole
in my head?
588
00:28:39,823 --> 00:28:40,907
It's the only way.
589
00:28:41,033 --> 00:28:43,952
It's gotta be something
other than a parasite.
590
00:28:44,077 --> 00:28:48,415
I buy my produce at the best market
in town and I always wash it.
591
00:28:48,540 --> 00:28:50,417
Leafy vegetables
can suck contaminated water
592
00:28:50,542 --> 00:28:52,044
through their roots
right into the plant.
593
00:28:52,169 --> 00:28:53,795
You could have
washed them in chlorine
594
00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,714
and it still
wouldn't have mattered.
595
00:28:55,839 --> 00:28:58,425
Then other people
would be sick as well.
596
00:28:58,550 --> 00:29:01,094
The parasites could have been
on only a few items,
597
00:29:01,219 --> 00:29:03,055
or maybe they just didn't eat
as much as you did.
598
00:29:03,180 --> 00:29:05,932
It's always
about my weight, isn't it?
599
00:29:06,058 --> 00:29:08,602
Why can't you people
come up with one theory...
600
00:29:08,727 --> 00:29:10,062
This one fits, George.
601
00:29:10,187 --> 00:29:14,399
It explains your coma,
your fever, your loss of appetite...
602
00:29:19,363 --> 00:29:22,157
And the disorientation?
603
00:29:23,241 --> 00:29:24,659
It's all explained.
604
00:29:24,785 --> 00:29:26,995
And if we don't treat it
while it's still in the acute stage,
605
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:28,163
it'll be too late.
606
00:29:28,288 --> 00:29:31,458
It could go on to infect your heart,
intestines, esophagus...
607
00:29:37,756 --> 00:29:40,300
This is what I get
for eating salad.
608
00:29:42,260 --> 00:29:44,638
(DRILLING MACHINE WHIRRING)
609
00:29:47,641 --> 00:29:48,558
FOREMAN: Suction.
610
00:29:48,683 --> 00:29:49,810
NURSE: Suction.
611
00:29:49,935 --> 00:29:51,311
Aspirator.
612
00:30:00,028 --> 00:30:01,530
Your turn.
613
00:30:03,740 --> 00:30:04,825
Irrigation.
614
00:30:05,992 --> 00:30:07,160
SPQHQG.
615
00:30:07,285 --> 00:30:08,578
What did you do?
616
00:30:08,703 --> 00:30:09,704
Nothing. Why, what's wrong?
617
00:30:09,830 --> 00:30:11,915
(STUTTERING) I can't see.
618
00:30:12,040 --> 00:30:13,375
\fision's blurry
or you've lost...
619
00:30:13,500 --> 00:30:15,168
I didn't lose it,
you took it from me!
620
00:30:15,293 --> 00:30:16,962
- George, calm down.
- I can't see!
621
00:30:17,087 --> 00:30:18,505
Give me some lorazepam!
622
00:30:18,630 --> 00:30:20,424
- What did you do to me?
- Hold still!
623
00:30:20,549 --> 00:30:21,675
- George! George!
- What's going on?
624
00:30:21,800 --> 00:30:24,719
- No. No. Calm down!
- What did you do to me?
625
00:30:26,805 --> 00:30:29,683
There's no inflammation in
the optic nerve and his retina's intact.
626
00:30:29,808 --> 00:30:32,018
The blindness has to have been caused
by something in his brain.
627
00:30:32,144 --> 00:30:34,187
And not surprisingly
there was no sign of Chagas'
628
00:30:34,312 --> 00:30:36,148
or any other
parasites in his CSF.
629
00:30:36,273 --> 00:30:38,442
So we've ruled out
his parents,
630
00:30:38,567 --> 00:30:40,819
prostitutes, the arugula.
Means either...
631
00:30:40,944 --> 00:30:42,237
I took the sample
from the prefrontal.
632
00:30:42,362 --> 00:30:44,322
I was never anywhere
near his visual cortex.
633
00:30:44,448 --> 00:30:47,033
Or you missed a tumor
on the MRI.
634
00:30:47,159 --> 00:30:49,035
Not a chance,
the MRI was clean.
635
00:30:49,161 --> 00:30:50,912
- You mind?
- Where are you going?
636
00:30:51,037 --> 00:30:52,664
To get a $400 butt plug.
637
00:30:52,789 --> 00:30:53,707
What about George?
638
00:30:53,832 --> 00:30:56,209
He's gonna have to
get his own. Come on.
639
00:30:56,334 --> 00:30:57,669
Let's see if we can
get this thing figured out
640
00:30:57,794 --> 00:30:59,546
by the time
we get to the elevator.
641
00:30:59,671 --> 00:31:00,922
It could be MS.
642
00:31:01,047 --> 00:31:02,757
Would explain the coma,
the blindness,
643
00:31:02,883 --> 00:31:04,050
loss of balance,
and the fever.
644
00:31:04,176 --> 00:31:06,052
Could also explain
his lack of concern for his health.
645
00:31:06,178 --> 00:31:07,596
MS can cause
excessive cheerfulness.
646
00:31:07,721 --> 00:31:09,222
Yeah, he's a delight.
647
00:31:09,347 --> 00:31:11,433
You don't get to MS
with coma as the first symptom.
648
00:31:11,558 --> 00:31:15,103
Blindness plus coma
says diabetes. Just in time.
649
00:31:15,228 --> 00:31:18,106
No. Blood sugar, urine dip stick
and hemoglobin A1c are normal.
650
00:31:18,231 --> 00:31:19,816
Were normal when you tested.
651
00:31:19,941 --> 00:31:20,942
He's been
in and out of a coma,
652
00:31:21,067 --> 00:31:22,652
whatever's going on
is waxing and waning,
653
00:31:22,777 --> 00:31:24,613
unlike his pants size,
which only waxes.
654
00:31:24,738 --> 00:31:27,282
Which also points to diabetes.
Test him again.
655
00:31:27,407 --> 00:31:29,784
And this time add
a glucose tolerance test and an HEC.
656
00:31:29,910 --> 00:31:31,495
We already have
a CSF sample,
657
00:31:31,620 --> 00:31:34,164
we might as well check it for proteins
to rule out MS first.
658
00:31:34,289 --> 00:31:36,625
Agreed. Except for the part
about doing it first.
659
00:31:36,750 --> 00:31:37,792
Where are you going?
660
00:31:37,918 --> 00:31:40,378
The butt plug was my way of saying,
"Mind your own business."
661
00:31:40,504 --> 00:31:42,547
Apparently too subtle.
662
00:31:42,672 --> 00:31:45,383
George, all it is
is sugar water, I promise.
663
00:31:45,509 --> 00:31:48,136
Just because I'm overweight
doesn't make me diabetic!
664
00:31:48,261 --> 00:31:50,305
You tested me,
everybody's tested me.
665
00:31:50,430 --> 00:31:52,182
Sometimes the blood sugar levels
can fluctuate,
666
00:31:52,307 --> 00:31:53,475
make it difficult
to diagnose.
667
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:56,895
You stuck a needle in my brain
and 10 seconds later I was blind!
668
00:31:57,020 --> 00:31:58,939
How is that difficult
to diagnose?
669
00:31:59,064 --> 00:32:01,358
Who the hell knows
what else you guys done to me?
670
00:32:01,483 --> 00:32:03,193
- I should have never come here!
- You didn't come here,
671
00:32:03,318 --> 00:32:06,154
you were brought here because you were
in a coma and barely alive.
672
00:32:06,279 --> 00:32:09,616
We didn't do that to you,
you need to let us figure out what did.
673
00:32:12,327 --> 00:32:13,954
For someone who insists
he enjoys life as much as you do,
674
00:32:14,079 --> 00:32:15,956
you certainly don't seem willing
to do much to prolong it.
675
00:32:16,081 --> 00:32:17,457
Yeah,
676
00:32:17,582 --> 00:32:22,128
because I don't agree with the brilliant
doctors, suddenly I'm suicidal!
677
00:32:22,254 --> 00:32:24,548
Refusing to cooperate with us
does not make you suicidal,
678
00:32:24,673 --> 00:32:25,799
it makes you an idiot.
679
00:32:25,924 --> 00:32:28,426
You think
we want to see you blind or in a coma?
680
00:32:31,972 --> 00:32:33,557
I've been fat all my life.
681
00:32:34,683 --> 00:32:37,769
I've only been sick
for the past few days.
682
00:32:39,229 --> 00:32:42,399
You look for a disease
that has nothing to do with my size,
683
00:32:42,524 --> 00:32:44,025
and I will help you.
684
00:32:45,694 --> 00:32:49,155
Otherwise, leave me alone.
685
00:32:52,200 --> 00:32:57,455
Speeding, DUI,
reckless driving,
686
00:32:57,581 --> 00:33:01,459
resisting arrest,
possession of a class three narcotic.
687
00:33:01,585 --> 00:33:02,586
And now it looks like
they've added
688
00:33:02,711 --> 00:33:06,464
another possession with intent
to traffic charge as well.
689
00:33:07,799 --> 00:33:09,593
They found some pills
at your house.
690
00:33:09,718 --> 00:33:11,886
All of which
I had a prescription for.
691
00:33:12,012 --> 00:33:12,929
That's a lot of pills.
692
00:33:13,054 --> 00:33:14,931
I'm in a lot of pain.
693
00:33:15,098 --> 00:33:18,393
This is all because some cop
came into the clinic,
694
00:33:18,518 --> 00:33:21,313
I was rude to him,
this is his way of getting back at me.
695
00:33:21,438 --> 00:33:22,314
You've made it pretty easy.
696
00:33:22,439 --> 00:33:27,235
His insane reaction to a simple
rectal thermometer reading
697
00:33:27,360 --> 00:33:30,947
probably says a lot more
about his mother than it says about me.
698
00:33:31,781 --> 00:33:34,743
I'm inclined to think
your particular charm
699
00:33:35,660 --> 00:33:39,247
may not be immediately
appreciated by a jury.
700
00:33:39,372 --> 00:33:41,124
I'm not interested
in a plea bargain.
701
00:33:41,249 --> 00:33:43,627
It's your best bet
to make this go away.
702
00:33:43,752 --> 00:33:46,421
There is no this.
There's a him.
703
00:33:46,546 --> 00:33:49,341
The only thing I'm guilty of
is humiliating a bully.
704
00:33:49,466 --> 00:33:51,926
I wasn't speeding,
I wasn't impaired, I didn't resist,
705
00:33:52,052 --> 00:33:53,887
and I certainly was not
distributing narcotics
706
00:33:54,012 --> 00:33:55,013
to anyone but myself,
707
00:33:55,138 --> 00:33:57,265
because I need
those narcotics.
708
00:33:58,058 --> 00:33:59,517
Five grand retainer.
709
00:33:59,643 --> 00:34:03,021
If we end up going to trial, there'll
be another 30 due before the first day.
710
00:34:03,146 --> 00:34:06,107
My hourly is 450.
That work for you?
711
00:34:10,904 --> 00:34:12,822
What'd your lawyer say?
712
00:34:13,573 --> 00:34:16,201
I looked up butt plug
in a legal dictionary. What'd he say?
713
00:34:16,326 --> 00:34:18,745
That a smile like mine
can't lose.
714
00:34:19,537 --> 00:34:20,372
What did the tests say?
715
00:34:20,497 --> 00:34:23,541
You were right about MS.
No myelin basic proteins in his CSF.
716
00:34:23,667 --> 00:34:24,918
- What about diabetes?
- Don't know.
717
00:34:25,043 --> 00:34:26,127
He says
we only think it's diabetes
718
00:34:26,252 --> 00:34:29,130
because of his weight,
won't let us test him.
719
00:34:43,937 --> 00:34:47,440
So, you would rather be a blind invalid
than admit the fact
720
00:34:47,565 --> 00:34:50,276
that maybe you might have
a little problem with overeating.
721
00:34:50,402 --> 00:34:51,444
By a little problem,
of course,
722
00:34:51,569 --> 00:34:53,238
I mean you've eaten yourself
half to death.
723
00:34:53,363 --> 00:34:55,699
And you would rather let me die
than consider the fact
724
00:34:55,824 --> 00:34:59,035
that whatever is wrong with me
has nothing to do with my weight.
725
00:34:59,160 --> 00:35:01,496
I go where the symptoms
tell me to go.
726
00:35:01,621 --> 00:35:03,581
And right now
they're asking why this stuff
727
00:35:03,707 --> 00:35:05,625
is the first thing
you've ever refused to swallow.
728
00:35:05,750 --> 00:35:07,794
I am not diabetic.
729
00:35:07,919 --> 00:35:11,715
Grocery stores giving away medical
degrees with the free turkeys now?
730
00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:13,633
The sooner you drink this,
the sooner I get to go waste my time
731
00:35:13,758 --> 00:35:14,676
with something else.
732
00:35:14,801 --> 00:35:16,428
Get the hell off of me!
733
00:35:16,553 --> 00:35:19,139
No dessert
till you've finished your dinner!
734
00:35:20,682 --> 00:35:22,142
George, just drink it!
735
00:35:22,267 --> 00:35:23,268
Nurse!
736
00:35:23,393 --> 00:35:26,104
Get this jackass off of me!
737
00:35:26,229 --> 00:35:27,814
What the hell is going on?
738
00:35:27,939 --> 00:35:29,232
Just trying to force
a horse to...
739
00:35:29,357 --> 00:35:30,442
(GEORGE GROANING)
740
00:35:31,443 --> 00:35:32,652
Let go!
741
00:35:54,257 --> 00:35:55,800
What's going on?
742
00:35:55,925 --> 00:35:59,721
Get X-rays of his hands.
Then bronc him, do a sputum cytology
743
00:35:59,846 --> 00:36:02,265
and check his CSF
for anti-hu antibodies.
744
00:36:02,390 --> 00:36:03,308
How are we gonna get him
to do all that,
745
00:36:03,433 --> 00:36:05,101
we can't even get him to drink
a bottle of sugar water?
746
00:36:05,226 --> 00:36:07,687
Tell him that lung cancer
is in no way connected to obesity.
747
00:36:07,812 --> 00:36:10,106
You don't think
he'll realize we're lying?
748
00:36:10,231 --> 00:36:12,567
You're not. Lung cancer's
got nothing to do with obesity.
749
00:36:12,692 --> 00:36:14,235
I meant about him
having lung cancer.
750
00:36:14,360 --> 00:36:16,571
You didn't notice
his fingers?
751
00:36:16,696 --> 00:36:17,781
I noticed they were fat.
752
00:36:17,906 --> 00:36:19,240
You should have
pissed him off,
753
00:36:19,365 --> 00:36:20,200
he would have grabbed you.
754
00:36:20,325 --> 00:36:21,367
Then you would have
felt the bones,
755
00:36:21,493 --> 00:36:24,287
they're not just fat,
they're clubbed.
756
00:36:57,111 --> 00:36:58,655
George,
757
00:37:00,615 --> 00:37:01,533
it's me.
758
00:37:06,162 --> 00:37:08,122
Your tests were positive.
759
00:37:09,707 --> 00:37:12,252
You have a small cell
lung carcinoma.
760
00:37:12,377 --> 00:37:14,587
It caused a paraneoplastic
neurologic syndrome,
761
00:37:14,712 --> 00:37:17,549
which in turn
caused your blindness and coma.
762
00:37:17,924 --> 00:37:20,593
The cancer's metastasized
to your lymph nodes.
763
00:37:21,886 --> 00:37:23,346
It's inoperable,
764
00:37:23,471 --> 00:37:26,224
but there are
radiation treatments available.
765
00:37:28,893 --> 00:37:31,563
They might give you
a few more months.
766
00:37:35,650 --> 00:37:37,151
I never smoked.
767
00:37:42,866 --> 00:37:44,075
(SIGHS)
768
00:37:51,165 --> 00:37:52,500
C'est Ia vie.
769
00:38:29,454 --> 00:38:30,830
CAMERON: You were right.
770
00:38:32,790 --> 00:38:35,126
- So was he.
- He said, "C'est la vie."
771
00:38:35,251 --> 00:38:36,711
He's a complicated man.
772
00:38:36,836 --> 00:38:37,962
What about you?
773
00:38:39,130 --> 00:38:40,632
What are you gonna do
about your problem?
774
00:38:40,757 --> 00:38:42,550
Nothing. Just got a call
from my lawyer.
775
00:38:42,675 --> 00:38:45,011
He gave the DA copies
of my prescriptions.
776
00:38:45,136 --> 00:38:46,679
Soon as they confirm
they're bona fides,
777
00:38:46,804 --> 00:38:49,557
they're gonna drop the possession,
DUI and resisting arrest.
778
00:38:49,682 --> 00:38:51,851
Soon as I pay
my $85 speeding ticket
779
00:38:51,976 --> 00:38:53,561
and the impound fine,
I get my bike back.
780
00:38:53,686 --> 00:38:54,812
I guess that's good.
781
00:38:54,938 --> 00:38:56,814
- You guess?
- No, it's good.
782
00:38:59,233 --> 00:39:01,778
You get to keep going
like you always have.
783
00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:06,491
All right, I give up.
Who was it?
784
00:39:06,616 --> 00:39:08,451
Who in your family
had the weight problem?
785
00:39:08,576 --> 00:39:10,036
You think I can only care
about a patient
786
00:39:10,161 --> 00:39:11,996
if I know someone else
who's been through the same thing?
787
00:39:12,121 --> 00:39:13,414
You care for everybody.
788
00:39:13,539 --> 00:39:15,708
You only lie
and stand up to Cuddy for a few.
789
00:39:15,833 --> 00:39:17,961
You lie for everybody
and only care about a few.
790
00:39:18,086 --> 00:39:19,629
You're avoiding the question.
791
00:39:19,754 --> 00:39:22,048
I like damaged people,
remember?
792
00:39:22,507 --> 00:39:24,425
It explains everything I do.
793
00:39:24,550 --> 00:39:25,802
Almost everything.
794
00:39:28,554 --> 00:39:30,056
It wasn't you, was it?
795
00:39:31,015 --> 00:39:33,309
- Does it matter?
- Nope, but it'd be interesting.
796
00:39:33,434 --> 00:39:34,477
Sorry to disappoint you,
797
00:39:34,602 --> 00:39:37,730
but sometimes the answers
just aren't that simple.
798
00:39:42,860 --> 00:39:44,737
I know he can be a real ass,
799
00:39:44,862 --> 00:39:47,198
and he has no problem lying
when it serves him,
800
00:39:47,323 --> 00:39:48,908
but he's not lying
about the pain.
801
00:39:49,033 --> 00:39:52,328
He needs the medication,
which is why I prescribed it.
802
00:39:52,453 --> 00:39:53,287
All of it.
803
00:39:53,413 --> 00:39:56,624
Well, I see a lot of cases
804
00:39:58,042 --> 00:40:01,879
where people who have
real injuries end up getting addicted.
805
00:40:03,423 --> 00:40:08,428
And then, well, things kind of
spiral out of control.
806
00:40:08,553 --> 00:40:11,347
And lives get ruined,
and not just their own.
807
00:40:15,101 --> 00:40:17,645
I don't know what else
to tell you.
808
00:40:28,698 --> 00:40:29,699
What about these?
809
00:40:29,824 --> 00:40:31,576
This is getting...
810
00:40:31,701 --> 00:40:33,953
If it's got my name on it,
it's a legit scrip.
811
00:40:34,078 --> 00:40:35,621
- You sure?
- Yeah.
812
00:40:36,164 --> 00:40:38,291
Because the signatures
on these
813
00:40:38,416 --> 00:40:41,794
look a little different
than the signatures on those.
814
00:40:50,553 --> 00:40:51,429
You look surprised.
815
00:40:51,554 --> 00:40:53,181
No, I'm just...
816
00:40:54,348 --> 00:40:58,811
I hadn't thought about it.
I do sign my name differently sometimes.
817
00:41:03,858 --> 00:41:05,693
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
818
00:41:05,818 --> 00:41:07,904
I just, I guess get bored
signing it the same way.
819
00:41:08,029 --> 00:41:10,865
You know what they say
about doctors' handwriting.
820
00:41:11,199 --> 00:41:14,535
I'm gonna give you a moment
821
00:41:15,828 --> 00:41:19,040
to reconsider that answer.
822
00:41:19,207 --> 00:41:23,628
Because if you are,
for some reason, mistaken,
823
00:41:26,214 --> 00:41:30,384
we will find out,
and that will not be good for you.
824
00:41:31,344 --> 00:41:33,012
Or Dr. House.
825
00:41:34,847 --> 00:41:36,891
I am sure. Absolutely.
826
00:41:40,645 --> 00:41:42,271
All right.
827
00:41:44,690 --> 00:41:46,275
I guess that's it, then.
828
00:41:57,120 --> 00:41:58,079
Thank you for your help.
829
00:41:58,204 --> 00:41:59,789
Okay, no problem.
830
00:42:04,544 --> 00:42:06,129
(DOOR OPENING)
831
00:42:07,463 --> 00:42:09,632
(DOOR CLOSING)