1 00:00:08,774 --> 00:00:11,476 What happened? What did you do? Dick, he touched it! 2 00:00:14,313 --> 00:00:17,015 What the heck is going on here? 3 00:00:17,016 --> 00:00:18,516 You almost made me spill my Joe. 4 00:00:18,517 --> 00:00:20,785 That noise, Don-- what is it? 5 00:00:23,656 --> 00:00:25,657 All right, everyone, 6 00:00:25,658 --> 00:00:28,093 there's no need to panic. 7 00:00:28,094 --> 00:00:32,330 This has been a test of the emergency broadcast system. 8 00:00:32,331 --> 00:00:34,666 - Why? Is there an emergency? - No. 9 00:00:34,667 --> 00:00:37,435 This has only been a test. 10 00:00:37,436 --> 00:00:39,804 Had this been an actual emergency, you would have been instructed 11 00:00:39,805 --> 00:00:42,340 on where to go in your area for shelter. 12 00:00:42,341 --> 00:00:44,408 - Shelter from what? - Bombs. 13 00:00:44,409 --> 00:00:47,411 - To interrupt a program of this quality 14 00:00:47,412 --> 00:00:50,481 under the guise of national security is preposterous! 15 00:00:50,482 --> 00:00:52,884 Ooh, look. It's back on. 16 00:00:56,288 --> 00:00:58,356 Hmm, x-files. 17 00:00:58,357 --> 00:01:01,025 Never really got it. 18 00:01:01,026 --> 00:01:03,361 I know. It's so inaccurate. 19 00:01:03,362 --> 00:01:05,930 Say, Sally, how's about tomorrow night 20 00:01:05,931 --> 00:01:08,066 I buy you the biggest steak in town? 21 00:01:08,067 --> 00:01:10,068 How's about you throw in a baked potato? 22 00:01:10,069 --> 00:01:12,070 How's about you wear that red dress? 23 00:01:12,071 --> 00:01:14,606 - How's about you pick me up at 8:00? - How's about I come early? 24 00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:16,808 How's about you let us watch our show? 25 00:01:19,712 --> 00:01:22,747 Oh, look at this. I bet they break the genetic code 26 00:01:22,748 --> 00:01:26,651 and realize scully's been implanted by the smokin' guy. 27 00:01:26,652 --> 00:01:30,688 Oh, look at that! The alien just put a probe in that guy's ear. 28 00:01:30,689 --> 00:01:32,790 Everybody knows you can't get a brain scan through the ear. 29 00:01:32,791 --> 00:01:35,760 You got to go through the butt. 30 00:01:35,761 --> 00:01:37,862 You know, I bet I could write a killer x-files. 31 00:01:37,863 --> 00:01:39,864 I could write one in my sleep. 32 00:01:39,865 --> 00:01:42,267 - I could write one hanging upside-down. - I could write one with crayon. 33 00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:44,636 I could write one if I lost both my arms and had to type with my feet. 34 00:01:44,637 --> 00:01:47,038 - I could write one-- - I want to watch one! 35 00:01:47,039 --> 00:01:49,207 Why don't you shut up and go write one? 36 00:01:49,208 --> 00:01:51,976 Fine, then. We will. Come on, Harry. 37 00:01:51,977 --> 00:01:54,645 - Yeah, come on. - Good! 38 00:01:54,646 --> 00:01:56,647 And when it's on Tv, I'll talk all through the damn thing, 39 00:01:56,648 --> 00:01:58,883 see how you like it! 40 00:01:58,884 --> 00:02:02,420 Someone should take the probe out of his butt. 41 00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,659 So sad when a colleague leaves. 42 00:02:41,660 --> 00:02:44,696 You know, you really feel as though a part of yourself-- 43 00:02:54,740 --> 00:02:57,408 so, Sonja, it's a shame 44 00:02:57,409 --> 00:02:59,877 we didn't have time to get to know each other better. 45 00:02:59,878 --> 00:03:02,480 Uh, yes, 15 years goes by 46 00:03:02,481 --> 00:03:05,550 rather quickly, doesn't it? 47 00:03:05,551 --> 00:03:09,220 Yeah. So, uh... 48 00:03:09,221 --> 00:03:11,889 why'd you decide to take that job at Columbia? 49 00:03:11,890 --> 00:03:14,626 Um, well, my mind was made up 50 00:03:14,627 --> 00:03:18,162 once I found out that they had the only unpublished collection 51 00:03:18,163 --> 00:03:20,164 of the early geometry writings 52 00:03:20,165 --> 00:03:22,133 of Nicolai Lobachevsky. 53 00:03:23,703 --> 00:03:26,771 That would be my major reason for relocating. 54 00:03:30,242 --> 00:03:32,743 - Can we take more than one? - Oh, take as much as you want. 55 00:03:32,744 --> 00:03:35,446 Nobody's gonna show up to this thing. 56 00:03:36,615 --> 00:03:38,883 You two should be ashamed of yourselves. 57 00:03:38,884 --> 00:03:41,285 Poor Sonja Umdahl has wasted years of her life 58 00:03:41,286 --> 00:03:44,088 in this stuffy, mildewed book mausoleum. 59 00:03:44,089 --> 00:03:46,290 The least you could do is wish her well. 60 00:03:46,291 --> 00:03:48,960 Yeah! Shame on you! 61 00:03:48,961 --> 00:03:51,362 Uh, good-bye, Sonja. 62 00:03:52,731 --> 00:03:54,832 Well, she doesn't have many friends, does she? 63 00:03:54,833 --> 00:03:57,701 No, she's just shy 64 00:03:57,702 --> 00:03:59,670 and introverted, 65 00:03:59,671 --> 00:04:01,906 weird. 66 00:04:01,907 --> 00:04:03,974 Go introduce yourself. 67 00:04:03,975 --> 00:04:05,776 Oh, no, Mary! Some of the students said 68 00:04:05,777 --> 00:04:08,579 that she has spiders in her hair! 69 00:04:08,580 --> 00:04:10,315 Get over there! 70 00:04:18,290 --> 00:04:21,726 Ah! Morgan's physical basis of heredity. 71 00:04:21,727 --> 00:04:23,728 It's a quick read, 72 00:04:23,729 --> 00:04:26,564 although I did find the footnotes intrusive. 73 00:04:26,565 --> 00:04:30,168 - Me too. - Dick Solomon, physics department. 74 00:04:30,169 --> 00:04:32,237 Sonja Umdahl. 75 00:04:32,238 --> 00:04:34,339 I knew you two would get along! 76 00:04:34,340 --> 00:04:37,342 Well, thanks for coming. 77 00:04:38,410 --> 00:04:40,644 And staying. 78 00:04:40,645 --> 00:04:43,248 - So, uh, let's go. - No, no, no, no. 79 00:04:43,249 --> 00:04:45,416 I got an idea. Let's do this right. 80 00:04:45,417 --> 00:04:47,685 Sonja, why don't you come over to my house tonight, 81 00:04:47,686 --> 00:04:51,255 say, uh, 7:00, and we'll fix a going-away dinner for you. 82 00:04:51,256 --> 00:04:53,324 - I'll bring dessert. - Great! 83 00:04:53,325 --> 00:04:56,060 Well, um-- 84 00:05:12,277 --> 00:05:14,579 hi, uh, excuse me. I'm looking for somebody, 85 00:05:14,580 --> 00:05:16,647 a big, strapping guy, handsome. 86 00:05:16,648 --> 00:05:19,316 - He's a cop. - Hi. 87 00:05:19,317 --> 00:05:22,453 - Here I am. - Good for you. I'm looking for somebody. 88 00:05:23,522 --> 00:05:27,091 Sally? It's me, Don. 89 00:05:28,561 --> 00:05:30,495 Don? 90 00:05:31,564 --> 00:05:34,465 Did you shave your mustache? 91 00:05:34,466 --> 00:05:36,634 I never had a mustache. 92 00:05:36,635 --> 00:05:39,037 Are you wearing contacts? 93 00:05:39,038 --> 00:05:41,673 No, Sally, I'm wearing my glasses. 94 00:05:43,242 --> 00:05:45,943 - Are they new? - Not since eighth grade. 95 00:05:50,249 --> 00:05:52,717 - In strictly quantum terms. - Of course. 96 00:05:52,718 --> 00:05:55,453 And just like you can have quarks and anti-quarks-- 97 00:05:55,454 --> 00:05:57,488 and neutrinos and anti-neutrinos. 98 00:05:57,489 --> 00:06:01,292 Wait a minute. Isn't a neutrino a breakfast bar? 99 00:06:03,195 --> 00:06:05,029 You were saying? 100 00:06:05,030 --> 00:06:07,165 You can actually have a particle 101 00:06:07,166 --> 00:06:09,200 that doesn't have a counterpart-- 102 00:06:09,201 --> 00:06:11,536 but is an energy all to itself 103 00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:14,171 - which exist simultaneously as its own opposite. - Right. 104 00:06:14,172 --> 00:06:17,241 - Both: the photon! - Yes! 105 00:06:21,546 --> 00:06:24,115 Oh, Dr. Solomon! 106 00:06:26,117 --> 00:06:28,786 - You are a fountain of knowledge. - And you... 107 00:06:28,787 --> 00:06:31,923 are a puddle of smartness. 108 00:06:31,924 --> 00:06:34,191 Okay, that's it. Party's over. 109 00:06:34,192 --> 00:06:36,327 Drive her home. 110 00:06:36,328 --> 00:06:39,830 Mary, it's so early. I wanted to hear Sonja's thoughts on refraction. 111 00:06:40,833 --> 00:06:43,634 Well, I'm sure it wouldn't be that interesting. 112 00:06:43,635 --> 00:06:45,769 Oh, Sonja, I'm sure it's fascinating, 113 00:06:45,770 --> 00:06:47,705 but I'd rather go to bed. 114 00:06:47,706 --> 00:06:51,109 So have a nice flight, drive, life, 115 00:06:51,110 --> 00:06:53,044 whatever. 116 00:06:54,513 --> 00:06:56,347 I'm so glad we met. 117 00:06:56,348 --> 00:06:59,550 And I'm so glad you don't have spiders in your hair. 118 00:07:01,086 --> 00:07:04,255 Okay, Harry, the first scene is critical. 119 00:07:04,256 --> 00:07:07,191 We have to hook the viewers with something exciting. 120 00:07:07,192 --> 00:07:10,261 How about a picnic? 121 00:07:10,262 --> 00:07:14,599 - Picnics aren't exciting. - I've been to some exciting picnics. 122 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,234 We need something to get the juices flowing. 123 00:07:17,235 --> 00:07:19,370 Maybe we should just start with a fight. 124 00:07:19,371 --> 00:07:21,639 Ooh! I bet that might just work. 125 00:07:38,790 --> 00:07:41,559 "Scully... 126 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:44,762 and Mulder... at a picnic." 127 00:07:49,602 --> 00:07:54,705 - Good morning. - Yes, isn't it? 128 00:07:54,706 --> 00:07:57,307 The air is crisp. Dew is on-- 129 00:07:57,308 --> 00:08:00,511 where the hell have you been? 130 00:08:00,512 --> 00:08:02,446 I took Sonja home, 131 00:08:02,447 --> 00:08:04,515 and we were having so much fun that I spent the night. 132 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:10,287 - Did you have sex with her? - No! 133 00:08:10,288 --> 00:08:12,991 I only do that with you! 134 00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:16,761 And sometimes Farrah fawcett in my head. 135 00:08:16,762 --> 00:08:18,963 Mary, all we wanted to do was talk. 136 00:08:18,964 --> 00:08:22,033 A man and a woman cannot connect intellectually 137 00:08:22,034 --> 00:08:26,170 without eventually connecting with their connectors. 138 00:08:26,171 --> 00:08:28,406 Are you saying that just because Sonja and I share 139 00:08:28,407 --> 00:08:31,842 the same intellectual interests, we're destined to share the same bed? 140 00:08:31,843 --> 00:08:34,278 - Yes. - But that's ridiculous! 141 00:08:34,279 --> 00:08:37,848 Sonja's far too intelligent to have sex with me. 142 00:08:45,757 --> 00:08:47,658 - Here you go. - Thank you. 143 00:08:47,659 --> 00:08:50,828 Nina, do you have many men friends? 144 00:08:50,829 --> 00:08:54,966 - Oh, yeah, lots. - And they're just friends? You don't... you know. 145 00:08:54,967 --> 00:08:56,901 Then, no. 146 00:08:59,370 --> 00:09:02,072 I think Sonja Umdahl likes Dick. 147 00:09:02,073 --> 00:09:04,408 So? A man would have to be a lunatic 148 00:09:04,409 --> 00:09:06,677 to be attracted to that woman. 149 00:09:07,746 --> 00:09:10,547 - Uh-oh. - Oh, no, Nina. 150 00:09:10,548 --> 00:09:13,217 I trust Dick, I really do, but... 151 00:09:13,218 --> 00:09:16,120 there's something about that woman that bothers me. 152 00:09:17,789 --> 00:09:19,990 - Want to know what I heard? - What? 153 00:09:19,991 --> 00:09:22,260 Sometimes if you peek through the library window 154 00:09:22,261 --> 00:09:24,262 - and she doesn't know you're looking, - Yeah? 155 00:09:24,263 --> 00:09:27,665 You can catch her with snakes moving all over her head. 156 00:09:27,666 --> 00:09:29,834 Just moving all over her head. 157 00:09:29,835 --> 00:09:32,737 Snakes and mo-- oh, and then I rinse 158 00:09:32,738 --> 00:09:35,707 and then I repeat 159 00:09:35,708 --> 00:09:37,775 and then I rinse and then I'm done. 160 00:09:37,776 --> 00:09:40,277 Oh, hello, Sonja. I thought you moved. 161 00:09:40,278 --> 00:09:43,147 Um, soon, soon. 162 00:09:43,148 --> 00:09:45,950 I'm just tying up dead ends. 163 00:09:45,951 --> 00:09:47,752 Great. 164 00:09:47,753 --> 00:09:50,688 I, uh, understand you and Dick 165 00:09:50,689 --> 00:09:53,290 had an interesting conversation last night. 166 00:09:53,291 --> 00:09:55,960 - Oh, he told you? - Dick tells me everything. 167 00:09:55,961 --> 00:09:59,664 Uh, what she needs to know is, are you after Dick Solomon, yes or no? 168 00:09:59,665 --> 00:10:01,765 Oh, my god! Is that what you think? 169 00:10:01,766 --> 00:10:03,901 That I want your boyfriend? 170 00:10:03,902 --> 00:10:06,604 Uh, yeah. 171 00:10:06,605 --> 00:10:08,739 Oh, I'm so sorry. 172 00:10:08,740 --> 00:10:10,808 I never should have kept talking, 173 00:10:10,809 --> 00:10:13,110 boring him with my thoughts. 174 00:10:13,111 --> 00:10:15,112 Please forgive me. 175 00:10:15,113 --> 00:10:17,782 You're the only friend I have. 176 00:10:19,418 --> 00:10:21,685 I'm sorry. 177 00:10:21,686 --> 00:10:24,989 It's okay. I'm still your friend. 178 00:10:24,990 --> 00:10:27,424 - So's Dick. - 'Kay. 179 00:10:27,425 --> 00:10:30,328 Do you want to go get a cup of coffee? 180 00:10:30,329 --> 00:10:33,864 No, I'll just stay here for a moment. 181 00:10:33,865 --> 00:10:36,634 I have to get my thoughts together. 182 00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:41,605 Oh, oh, okay, honey. 183 00:10:41,606 --> 00:10:44,208 I hope you're happy! You made her cry! 184 00:10:50,048 --> 00:10:52,783 Hello, professor. 185 00:10:52,784 --> 00:10:54,885 Sonja, I thought you left. 186 00:10:54,886 --> 00:10:57,855 I couldn't leave, Dr. Solomon. 187 00:10:57,856 --> 00:10:59,890 I couldn't leave you. 188 00:10:59,891 --> 00:11:02,393 Oh, I'll be all right. 189 00:11:02,394 --> 00:11:05,029 You can pretend all you want, professor, 190 00:11:05,030 --> 00:11:08,299 but Sonja sees through your little char-r-Ade. 191 00:11:08,300 --> 00:11:12,069 - Take me! - Sonja, I can't do this with you! 192 00:11:12,070 --> 00:11:15,205 This is what Mary is for. 193 00:11:15,206 --> 00:11:17,508 Ah, come on! 194 00:11:17,509 --> 00:11:20,043 Do you mean to tell me you always talk calculus 195 00:11:20,044 --> 00:11:22,346 with women you're not attracted to? 196 00:11:24,182 --> 00:11:26,817 Now, Sonja is itchy! Scratch her! 197 00:11:36,694 --> 00:11:40,297 Dick, I just want you to know I spoke with Sonja today. 198 00:11:40,298 --> 00:11:42,966 - You did? I didn't. - She considers us 199 00:11:42,967 --> 00:11:46,003 to be just good friends-- that's all she wants. 200 00:11:46,004 --> 00:11:48,839 Then why did she try to do unspeakable things to me? 201 00:11:48,840 --> 00:11:51,008 - What? - Right here on this desk! 202 00:11:51,009 --> 00:11:54,445 Things that only you do! Not nearly often enough. 203 00:11:56,348 --> 00:11:59,950 - I can't believe it! - Believe it, Mary. She wants me! 204 00:11:59,951 --> 00:12:02,486 And not just my mind. She wants my body, 205 00:12:02,487 --> 00:12:04,989 my beautiful body! 206 00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:08,159 I can't believe that woman stood in my office and lied to me! 207 00:12:08,160 --> 00:12:09,560 But I resisted her, Mary. 208 00:12:09,561 --> 00:12:11,862 I told her I wasn't interested in her that way. 209 00:12:11,863 --> 00:12:14,865 - I should hope so! - I told her to get right out of our office. 210 00:12:14,866 --> 00:12:16,833 Good for you! 211 00:12:16,834 --> 00:12:19,904 - And I promised to see her tonight. - What? 212 00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:22,440 - It was the only way I could get rid of her. - The only way? 213 00:12:22,441 --> 00:12:25,442 Did you try a fire hose? 214 00:12:25,443 --> 00:12:28,612 No, but I did tell her to put her blouse back on. 215 00:12:30,548 --> 00:12:33,217 That was quick thinking, right? 216 00:12:33,218 --> 00:12:35,886 You know, I'm beginning to wonder 217 00:12:35,887 --> 00:12:38,555 if you're as committed to this relationship as I am. 218 00:12:38,556 --> 00:12:41,692 Look, tonight I'm gonna tell her I can't see her anymore. 219 00:12:41,693 --> 00:12:43,827 Good, 'cause it's either me... 220 00:12:43,828 --> 00:12:45,263 or the spider woman. 221 00:12:47,498 --> 00:12:50,634 Oh! I'm the devil's candy! 222 00:12:55,707 --> 00:12:57,641 Sally? 223 00:12:59,611 --> 00:13:01,779 Yeah? 224 00:13:01,780 --> 00:13:04,014 I been thinking about what happened last night. 225 00:13:04,015 --> 00:13:06,050 Well, here's what I'm thinking. 226 00:13:09,353 --> 00:13:11,354 I'm thinking I'm a starving woman, 227 00:13:11,355 --> 00:13:13,891 and you're the blue-plate special at the beef 'n' griddle. 228 00:13:16,027 --> 00:13:19,429 You had me worried. I thought we took the midnight train to splits-ville. 229 00:13:19,430 --> 00:13:22,199 Well, we may have crossed signals at the last junction, 230 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,634 but now we're back on track. 231 00:13:24,635 --> 00:13:26,570 All aboard. 232 00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:30,807 Whoo, whoo. 233 00:13:32,844 --> 00:13:35,145 Okay, they run down the hallway-- 234 00:13:35,146 --> 00:13:37,581 - a government agent is waiting. - He shoots. 235 00:13:37,582 --> 00:13:40,484 - His hits the agent-- - But he's wearing a bulletproof vest. 236 00:13:40,485 --> 00:13:42,453 - Mulder runs. - The agent follows. 237 00:13:42,454 --> 00:13:44,855 - He traps Mulder in the hallway. - Both: he kills Mulder! 238 00:13:47,526 --> 00:13:49,993 - You're brilliant. - Oh, thank you. And you're a genius. 239 00:13:49,994 --> 00:13:52,996 - True, but you're the best. - Back at you. And you are super. 240 00:13:52,997 --> 00:13:55,266 Both: we're both great! 241 00:13:55,267 --> 00:13:58,435 All right, let's get that down. 242 00:13:58,436 --> 00:14:00,671 Okay, buddy. 243 00:14:00,672 --> 00:14:03,540 - What'd we say? - I don't remember. 244 00:14:20,191 --> 00:14:22,826 Dr. Solomon, I knew you'd come. 245 00:14:22,827 --> 00:14:24,795 Sonja, I-I-- 246 00:14:24,796 --> 00:14:27,531 I have something to tell you. 247 00:14:27,532 --> 00:14:30,267 You are a brilliant, 248 00:14:30,268 --> 00:14:32,970 beautiful, fascinating woman. 249 00:14:32,971 --> 00:14:35,673 - Let's go to bed. - All right. 250 00:14:35,674 --> 00:14:39,309 No, no, no. What I mean is, 251 00:14:39,310 --> 00:14:42,213 I'm sorry if I've misled you in any way, 252 00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:45,449 but my heart, my mind, and Mr. Wiggly 253 00:14:45,450 --> 00:14:47,584 all belong to Mary Albright. 254 00:14:51,022 --> 00:14:53,356 Oh, really? 255 00:14:53,357 --> 00:14:55,926 Then I have something to tell you, my darling, 256 00:14:55,927 --> 00:14:58,462 but my words would be hollow 257 00:14:58,463 --> 00:15:00,398 unless sung. Please sit. 258 00:15:07,038 --> 00:15:09,440 ♪ First there was newton ♪ 259 00:15:09,441 --> 00:15:12,309 ♪ who could tell how things fell ♪ 260 00:15:12,310 --> 00:15:16,147 ♪ but I never have fallen that way ♪ 261 00:15:17,749 --> 00:15:19,917 ♪ then there was hawking ♪ 262 00:15:19,918 --> 00:15:22,553 ♪ who told of black holes ♪ 263 00:15:22,554 --> 00:15:26,657 ♪ but I've never been sucked in, per Se ♪ 264 00:15:28,060 --> 00:15:31,128 ♪ and no one, not Einstein ♪ 265 00:15:31,129 --> 00:15:35,265 ♪ has made me feel as fine ♪ 266 00:15:35,266 --> 00:15:39,203 ♪ as Solomon's made me ♪ 267 00:15:39,204 --> 00:15:41,772 ♪ today... ♪ 268 00:15:41,773 --> 00:15:43,740 I gotta go. 269 00:15:43,741 --> 00:15:46,677 ♪ You've awakened my passion, Dick Solomon ♪ 270 00:15:46,678 --> 00:15:50,747 - ♪ you've made physics a physical thing ♪ - I did? 271 00:15:50,748 --> 00:15:54,018 ♪ Our electronics magnetic, our energy's kinetic ♪ 272 00:15:54,019 --> 00:15:58,021 - ♪ my harmonic is oscillating ♪ - Oh, lord! 273 00:15:58,022 --> 00:16:01,525 - ♪ You've awakened my passion, Dick Solomon ♪ - Please stop! 274 00:16:01,526 --> 00:16:03,527 ♪ You've made my life turn ♪ 275 00:16:03,528 --> 00:16:06,163 ♪ on a dime... ♪ 276 00:16:06,164 --> 00:16:08,031 chiffon. 277 00:16:08,032 --> 00:16:12,002 ♪ I know this sounds crass ♪ 278 00:16:13,237 --> 00:16:16,440 ♪ but your energy times ♪ 279 00:16:16,441 --> 00:16:19,309 ♪ my mass... ♪ 280 00:16:22,647 --> 00:16:26,283 ♪ would create an explosion ♪ 281 00:16:26,284 --> 00:16:29,520 - ♪ through time. ♪ - Listen, Sonja, no. 282 00:16:29,521 --> 00:16:31,455 Oh my god, we're skipping! 283 00:16:33,291 --> 00:16:35,259 Oh my god! 284 00:16:40,165 --> 00:16:42,632 Can't you see it's bigger than both of us? 285 00:16:42,633 --> 00:16:45,635 Well, thank you, but I-I feel-- 286 00:16:45,636 --> 00:16:47,004 I have to go home! 287 00:17:00,318 --> 00:17:02,919 I love walking in the rain. 288 00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:04,921 It's fun. 289 00:17:04,922 --> 00:17:07,291 Really? I found it tedious. 290 00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:09,426 Maybe that's because I was with you. 291 00:17:10,895 --> 00:17:13,230 Oh, Don, this isn't working. 292 00:17:13,231 --> 00:17:15,933 Yeah, I kinda got that vibe. 293 00:17:15,934 --> 00:17:17,935 I'm sorry, Don. 294 00:17:19,170 --> 00:17:21,204 I'm sorry too. 295 00:17:21,205 --> 00:17:24,474 Oh, look. The sun came out. 296 00:17:24,475 --> 00:17:27,011 Yeah, but not for us. 297 00:17:27,012 --> 00:17:29,312 Well, 298 00:17:29,313 --> 00:17:31,381 good bye, Sally. 299 00:17:31,382 --> 00:17:34,818 It was nice... while it lasted. 300 00:17:34,819 --> 00:17:36,153 Good bye, Don. 301 00:17:36,154 --> 00:17:38,388 Hold on a minute there, big guy! 302 00:17:41,158 --> 00:17:43,627 Maybe I've, uh, been a little hasty. 303 00:17:43,628 --> 00:17:46,163 Freeze! 304 00:17:46,164 --> 00:17:48,565 I may not have officially made detective yet, 305 00:17:48,566 --> 00:17:52,469 but I think I've figured out what's going on here. 306 00:17:52,470 --> 00:17:54,705 You're not in love with me. 307 00:17:54,706 --> 00:17:57,808 You're in love with the uniform. 308 00:17:57,809 --> 00:17:59,810 Could you be right? 309 00:17:59,811 --> 00:18:03,413 Could my attraction to you be completely superficial? 310 00:18:07,285 --> 00:18:08,986 I'm afraid so. 311 00:18:08,987 --> 00:18:11,054 What does this mean for us, Don? 312 00:18:11,055 --> 00:18:13,023 I'll tell you what it means. 313 00:18:13,024 --> 00:18:16,193 It means you never see me out of uniform again. 314 00:18:16,194 --> 00:18:18,528 Hot dog! 315 00:18:18,529 --> 00:18:20,430 And you know, 316 00:18:20,431 --> 00:18:22,699 I've got a hat too. 317 00:18:24,302 --> 00:18:26,837 Wear it. 318 00:18:41,519 --> 00:18:44,321 - Oh, it's you. - Hello, Sonja. 319 00:18:45,923 --> 00:18:49,693 I just spoke to Dick. I believe we have a problem. 320 00:18:49,694 --> 00:18:52,029 I don't see your boyfriend 321 00:18:52,030 --> 00:18:54,564 wanting me as a problem. 322 00:18:54,565 --> 00:18:56,834 Let's get down to business, shall we? 323 00:18:56,835 --> 00:19:00,504 - No! - Dick, I told you to wait in the car! 324 00:19:00,505 --> 00:19:02,773 I can't allow women to fight over me. 325 00:19:02,774 --> 00:19:05,910 Not even if they're wearing bikinis in a big tub of mud! 326 00:19:06,978 --> 00:19:09,413 Mmm. 327 00:19:09,414 --> 00:19:11,815 We're not going to fight. 328 00:19:13,318 --> 00:19:15,786 Let's just settle this once and for all, shall we? 329 00:19:15,787 --> 00:19:18,488 Dick, are you interested in Sonja romantically? 330 00:19:18,489 --> 00:19:21,291 Well, she's very smart and very attractive-- 331 00:19:21,292 --> 00:19:24,828 - Dick! - But no, Mary, I love you. 332 00:19:24,829 --> 00:19:27,064 There you have it. Game over. 333 00:19:27,065 --> 00:19:29,800 The game's not over till I say it's over. 334 00:19:29,801 --> 00:19:31,835 - Is the game over? - No. 335 00:19:33,104 --> 00:19:35,572 Sonja, stay away from my man! 336 00:19:35,573 --> 00:19:37,708 He'll be mine soon. 337 00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:39,977 Not while I'm still breathing. 338 00:19:39,978 --> 00:19:43,680 Then I'll just have to stop you from breathing, won't I? 339 00:19:43,681 --> 00:19:46,283 Listen, um-- wait, wait-- hold it-- 340 00:19:46,284 --> 00:19:49,119 - can't we please just be friends? 341 00:19:50,555 --> 00:19:52,556 Someone use a fist! 342 00:19:55,960 --> 00:19:58,495 I give! I give! 343 00:20:02,467 --> 00:20:05,035 Game over. Let's go. 344 00:20:05,036 --> 00:20:07,037 Oh! 345 00:20:07,038 --> 00:20:09,039 Oh, my god! 346 00:20:09,040 --> 00:20:11,108 Mary... 347 00:20:11,109 --> 00:20:14,478 I am so turned on! 348 00:20:23,120 --> 00:20:26,523 Ah, my little tigress. 349 00:20:26,524 --> 00:20:29,460 Once again I must tell you how magnificent you were. 350 00:20:29,461 --> 00:20:32,896 I was pretty terrific, wasn't I? 351 00:20:32,897 --> 00:20:36,033 Dick, does Sonja have something I don't have? 352 00:20:36,034 --> 00:20:38,635 Oh, yes, a gargoyle door-Knocker. 353 00:20:40,905 --> 00:20:44,374 I mean, do I stimulate you enough intellectually? 354 00:20:44,375 --> 00:20:47,010 Oh, Mary. 355 00:20:47,011 --> 00:20:49,546 - No. - What? 356 00:20:49,547 --> 00:20:53,250 Nobody does. But that's not what I want from you, Mary. 357 00:20:53,251 --> 00:20:56,320 I want to hear about your day, what you had for lunch, 358 00:20:56,321 --> 00:20:58,922 why you got so mad at the dry cleaners, 359 00:20:58,923 --> 00:21:02,659 your charmingly misguided theories on evolution. 360 00:21:02,660 --> 00:21:04,661 Your voice, Mary, 361 00:21:04,662 --> 00:21:07,264 I want to hear your beautiful voice. 362 00:21:07,265 --> 00:21:09,466 - Thank you. - Mary? 363 00:21:09,467 --> 00:21:11,235 What? 364 00:21:11,236 --> 00:21:13,470 You're hurting my hand. 365 00:21:23,114 --> 00:21:25,115 Well, that's it-- 366 00:21:25,116 --> 00:21:27,651 two and a half pounds of x-files gold. 367 00:21:27,652 --> 00:21:29,820 - Let's send it off. - Pleasure working with you, my man. 368 00:21:29,821 --> 00:21:31,421 - Effortless. - Seamless. 369 00:21:31,422 --> 00:21:33,423 You know, it's times like these it makes me proud 370 00:21:33,424 --> 00:21:35,792 to be an alien posing as a human being writer. 371 00:21:41,465 --> 00:21:44,935 Times like these I wish I'd numbered the pages.